Chapter 35: Yes

Elizabeth could not believe her ears as Darcy's words struck her like lightning, and she struggled to free herself from his grasp, but he held on to her firmly and pulled her closer.

"What... What are you saying? Let me leave," she cried, just wanting to run away from him.

"Why did I say something wrong?"

She could not fathom how he discovered her real identity.

"How could you do this to me?" Darcy cried in agony.

"What did I ever do to you?"

"You made a fool of me and made me believe my feelings were one-sided. You did a great job of convincing me that you detested me."

Elizabeth was speechless.

"Tell me, is that the truth? Were you sincere when you said you had no regard for me, stating that I was blind about your indifference to me?"

"Mr. Darcy, you do not understand anything."

"Of course I do, Elizabeth. I understand everything about your past, including what happened in your home, forcing you into the world. Forcing you to employ yourself in disguise."

Tears streamed down her eyes.

"Do you think my love for you would change because of your past? Ever since I understood the truth, I was tormented as to how you could think so ill of me. How could you be so cruel?"

"No, I did not think like that and would never insult you so."

"But you did and questioned the depth of my feelings and made me feel guilty for expressing myself to a woman who hated me. All this while, I was guilty of distressing your livelihood here, and I spent sleepless nights unable to come to terms with your refusal. Tell me, why did you refuse me?"

"Because I could never accept you. If you know my identity, you must know why I ran away from home. My birth.. my mother... I cannot put you in a position to bear the misery of marrying someone like me."

"You have no right to decide that for me, Elizabeth. I do not care about society or your past. I am enraged that you believe me capable of forsaking someone who I love more than my life. And your words that day have haunted me day and night. How could you do this? Tell me now, do you love me?" he asked angrily.

"Mr. Darcy, please...I cannot..," she cried, with despair.

"Elizabeth, answer me, do you love me?" he growled.

"Yes, yes, I do. I love you with all my heart," she blurted out, unable to lie to him anymore, and fell into his chest, crying unbearably.

Darcy held her close to him and allowed her to cry her heart out. He felt a sense of peace to hear her declaration.

Elizabeth could not believe that she was crying on his chest; he had his hands wrapped around her protectively.

Nothing made sense to her, how he became aware of her secret, knew everything about her past life, and who informed him everything.

But she realized the truth. The anger she had seen on his face the day before was because he somehow knew she loved him and had lied about the same.

Darcy did not say anything, and he did not want to, he wanted her to let out all the emotions she had been holding within herself.

How long they stood there she never knew and finally asked him, "How... how do you know?"

He replied in one word.

"Mary."

A week ago in Lucas Lodge, as Sir William left the library, Darcy held a bookmark, with a beautiful painting of tulips on it. He found it in the book of sonnets and had seen the same tulips, the color, and the style of strokes before. And it struck him immediately, as she had seen Georgiana use the same, and she had informed him that Elizabeth had gifted her the bookmark. He turned the bookmark and read what was written.

To my,

dearest friend

Charlotte.

With love,

Elizabeth

All the questions he had in mind about the Bennets, the strange behavior of Sir William while mentioning his daughter's friend, Mary's sadness, everything made sense to him now. He felt as though all the missing pieces of the puzzle had fallen into place. Just then, the library door opened, and in walked Mariah Lucas.

She had come in search of her father and was startled to see Darcy holding the bookmark.

"Miss Lucas, who made this bookmark?" he asked, not wasting an instant.

"It is my sister's, her friend gave it to her," she said, answering in worry.

"May I ask who the friend is?"

Maria could not reply. Darcy did not want her to. He pocketed the bookmark and left the room.

He found Mary in the company of other ladies and waited for his moment to talk to her.

"Miss Mary, do not be alarmed. I need to speak with you in private, and it is regarding your sister."

Mary was too stunned to speak.

"Which sist.. I mean.. sir...I," she stammered.

"You very well know which sister, please meet me at the Mount tomorrow morning," he said and left with his friend.

That night was a torment to both Darcy and Mary. Each of them did not know what to expect the next morning. Mary understood from Maria about his questioning in the library.

Whatever happens, I must meet him tomorrow. This is my only opportunity to help Elizabeth. She thought.

The next morning, they met at Oakham Mount, and Darcy immediately showed her the bookmark.

"I apologize for demanding you to meet me in private, but I know this bookmark was painted by the same person with whom I have been acquainted in Derbyshire. The same person employed in Ashton Park as Miss Elizabeth Smith. Do you deny it?"

"I don't, sir. Miss Smith, is my sister."

"But why? Why does she have to live a life in disguise?"

"Because she did not have a choice, and I was the one who pushed her to run away from home," she said with tears.

One by one, Mary revealed all the happenings that led to Elizabeth's decision to leave Longbourn.

Darcy was enraged when he heard about the horrific plan of her parents to ruin her.

"She had no other choice, and there was no one we could trust at that point, and our uncle in town was away. Had she spent another day in Longbourn, that horrible man would have ruined her for life. My parents behaved with cruelty towards her, and to date, I cannot forgive them."

"How do you correspond with her?"

"My letters reach Lizzy through Charlotte, Sir Williams's eldest. Maria has been helping me regarding this."

"So, you knew who I was since the day we were introduced, didn't you?"

"I did."

"Does she know I am here?"

"No, she does not."

"Why?"

"Because I chose not to."

"Did you fear that I would ruin her employment there?"

"Good Lord, no, it is because….,"

"Because she told you about my proposal," realizing how close the sisters were.

Mary nodded.

"Sir, may I ask you a question?"

Darcy nodded.

"Do you still love my sister?"

"I do not know what she informed you about the nature of my proposal. But the truth is, I love her and will forever, there is no place in my heart for any other woman."

"Do you think she is indifferent towards you?"

"I have pondered about this since the day I declared my feelings to your sister, and I still cannot believe she does not care for me. The reason I left Derbyshire was to allow her to be at peace without enduring my company."

"Forgive me, but if you love her deeply, you must know the real reason why she refused you."

Darcy's heart raced. It cannot be true.

Mary handed him some letters and asked him to read them.

Darcy read one and finally came to understand Elizabeth's heart. The reason why she refused him was because she loved him equally and could not watch him suffer by marrying her. He could not read more and did not want to. He handed them back to Mary.

How could she think so ill of me? If I had cared about society, I would have married long ago.

"Please do not be angry with her," Mary pleaded.

"But I am. She chose to inflict misery not only on me but upon herself as well. From her words, I can understand the suffering is not mine alone."

Mary could see he was angry with Elizabeth.

"Mr. Darcy, Lizzy has always lived for the happiness of the people she loves. In this case, her decision was based on your welfare and your sister's as well."

Darcy was silent.

"I wanted to reveal the truth to you but did not know how to. As for Lizzy, she has no idea that you are here."

"You have been very careful of safeguarding your sister. I must thank you. The reason I am not returning with you to Longbourn to deal with your parents is because I need to speak with your sister first before I act on my instinct."

Mary could see that he did not want to spare her parents. Inwardly, she wanted them to get paid for what they did.

"Are you leaving for Derbyshire as planned?"

"Yes. I cannot give you an exact picture of how things will turn out there, but once I speak with your sister, you will hear from her."

Mary nodded. She felt strangely light as she went back home and hoped with all her heart that Darcy would be able to resolve everything between him and Elizabeth. Mary hoped that she would see her sister soon.

As Darcy related the details, Elizabeth listened in astonishment.

Mary hid his presence in Hertfordshire from me for long. Oh! God! I cannot believe all this.

"You found out this because of the bookmark?" she asked in amazement at the developments.

"Yes, I did. I remember the ones you painted in Emily's book and the ones you gave to Georgiana, as well. I may not have expressed myself very articulately before, but every single action of yours is etched in my memory forever, and I cannot tell you how much you have impacted my life. I was so angry at you after knowing the truth, and I still cannot forgive you for hiding your love. You do not know much I have suffered, and from your letter, I understand you felt the same."

"Did you read all the letters?"

"No, just one. I did not want to read anymore. I wanted to come and see you in person. I did not have to wait till today to confirm your feelings. Even though you tried to hide it, the happiness and tears on your face when I entered the parlor yesterday confirmed everything to me."

Elizabeth was speechless.

"Elizabeth, I do not care about your past. All I want is to live a life with you and give you the love you deserve. I have never cared about society, and trust me, our union will never cause any shame to me. There is nothing in your past that you need to be ashamed of. The only people who need to be ashamed are those who raised and betrayed you. Now tell me, do you trust me on my words?"

"Ye.. yes," Elizabeth trembled.

"Will you marry me?" he asked, looking at her, his gaze piercing her soul.

Everything she had held as a reason to refuse him seemed trivial to her. In her heart, she realized she could not live without him and understood that he felt the same. She did not doubt her future with him, and for Darcy, it seemed like an eternity before she replied.

"I will," she said and fell into his arms again.