A/N More Gina POV! She's a genuinely good character. I enjoyed this one. Kind of wishing I hadn't said in Imagine Happiness that she took a back seat, but then again I don't see her doing this sort of thing that often anyway. Hope you enjoy

Gina POV

I pick up the phone as it rings. "Hello, Elm Tree House."

"Gina?"

"Oh, Tracy!" It's been a hard morning, and the small voice on the other end of the phone is a very welcome surprise. "Oh babes, how are you doing?"

"I, I don't know. Better I guess. I'm not in hospital anymore so I must be a bit better."

I smile sadly at Tracy's struggle with her feelings. I assume she's been feeling numb a lot of the time, leading to an inability to tell how she feels. "You definitely sound a bit better. It's so nice to hear your voice after all these weeks."

"I'm sorry."

"No, don't be sorry." I can feel my frustration growing, at myself. I've asked a question she's struggled to answer, and now I've made her apologise. "You haven't been well. I'm just so glad you decided to call."

"Mike said I should say hi."

"Is he there with you now?"

"Yeah. He's staying until his shift."

"That's good to hear. I'm glad he's been looking after you." I smile. "Oh Tracy, it is so good to hear your voice. You have no idea."

I pause for a moment.

"Did you want to talk about anything in particular? Or did you just want to call?"

"I, I just wanted to call. I haven't really spoken to anyone other than Mike and Cam for a few weeks since I've been home. I thought I'd be brave."

"You've been very brave through all of this from what I've heard."

"I haven't. I've just relied on Mike and Cam to get me through."

"You've fought very hard to keep going. You could have given up, you could have become more ill when you got home. You're doing really well."

"I guess."

"And you called me! And you know how big and scary I am!"

Tracy giggles.

It feels a bit like I'm dealing with one of the kids at the moment, but that seems to be what she needs right now. Slow and gentle. Kind and calm.

"The kids are missing you. They're really looking forward to you coming back."

"I miss them too."

"I know babes. It's strange not having you around."

I hear a sniffle.

"Oh no, Tracy, don't cry. Is Mike with you?"

"He's in the living room." There's another sniffle.

"Oh Tracy, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make you cry."

"I want to see the kids, but I don't think I can cope with that at the moment. I want to seeyou. I miss everyone."

I look to my watch. My shift is actually over in a couple of hours. "Did you want me to pop round later?"

"Pop round?" There are still tears in her voice, and it breaks my heart.

"Just to come and see you. It feels like forever since I last saw you."

There's a moment of silence. Then her quiet voice comes through. "I'd like that."

"I'll be with you soon after Mike leaves then. As soon as he gets here I'll head to yours."

"Ok. I'll make sure I'm dressed then."

"It's up to you. I don't mind you in your pyjamas. Whatever you're comfortable with."

"Ok."

"Right, well I'd better get back to work. Go get a hug from Mike for being brave, and I'll see you later."

"See you later."

I say goodbye, then put the phone down, a smile on my face. I'm looking forward to seeing Tracy, and giving her a hug of my own.

I must be going soft!

I look up from my paperwork as I hear the door go. I needed something to help make the time pass.

Mike comes into the office, looking a little drained.

"Mike? Are you ok?"

He sighs, taking a seat at his desk. "Just Tracy."

"What's wrong?"

He sighs again. "I'm an idiot. I had the lunchtime news on, they did a bit about mental health figures and deaths in the region... I wasn't really listening, but she obviously was."

"Oh poor mite. Too soon for something like that."

"Much too soon."

I pause for a moment. "Is Cam with her?"

"We don't leave her alone at the moment."

"And is she still ok for me to visit?"

"She should be. Obviously if it's too much you might need to leave, but it won't be anything to do with you."

"I'm not going to take that personally, you know that. I'd just love to see her."

"She was looking forward to it."

"Right, well I'd better go then." I pick up my bag. "I'll see you later."

"See you later."

As I head out of the door my stomach knots up a little. I really must be going soft. Then again she's been through so much, it's only natural that we're all worried about her at the moment.

I get in my car and head to hers.

I knock on the door.

Cam answers. "Oh hi Gina. Mike said you'd be popping round."

"Cam, it's lovely to see you. How are you?"

She sighs. "It's been a lot. We're just trying to get through."

"Let me know if there's anything I can do."

She gives me a smile. Then she shows me through.

My eyes find Tracy immediately. She's curled up on the sofa, dressed in some leggings and one of her long sleeved tops. "Hi Tracy."

She doesn't seem to hear me.

Cam sits down next to her. "Trace? What's wrong?"

"Nothing, I just, I should have been more presentable for Gina coming. She doesn't want to see me like this." She gets up, going to head past me.

I put my arm out to stop her. "Tracy, I just want to see you. I don't care if you're presentable as you put it or if you're curled up in bed in four day old pyjamas. I've missed you."

I think I'vegonesoft now.

"You've missed me?"

"I have. Mike's been keeping me updated with everything you've been going through and it's been absolutely awful. I've wanted to be there, but I had to stay at Elm Tree, to try and keep some stability for the kids. I was so glad when you called today."

Tracy begins to cry. I put my hand on her back and gently steer her back to the sofa. As I wrap her in a hug I can feel how tense she is.

"Shh, it's ok." I give her a squeeze. "It's ok, babes. Just calm. You're ok."

Tracy settles in my arms. Her tension fades. I can feel myself calming too. I know how hard this time has been for Mike and Cam, that it hasn't been nearly as hard for me. But my heart did ache when Mike told me what Tracy had done, and that ache hasn't quite gone away.

I can feel it lessening as I hold her to me. Not being able to see her, not knowing how she was really getting on, has definitely kept the ache there for longer.

I let Tracy go as she pulls away from me. I watch her as she curls herself back up, as she takes a couple of deep breaths.

"You ok?"

She nods. "Thank you."

I give her a smile. "No need to thank me."

There's a moment of silence.

"The kids go back to school next week. It's a lot quieter here than it is at Elm Tree at the moment. I'll be glad when they go back!"

Tracy doesn't answer.

I sigh. I seem to be saying all the wrong things at the moment. "You're sad you've missed the holidays, aren't you?"

She nods.

"You'll get more holidays, Tracy. I'm sure you'll be well enough to spend Christmas there if you want to."

"I hope so."

"You will. You've come so far already."

She sighs, then turns to look at Cam. She's sat at the table, doing something on her laptop.

"Cam?"

"Yes?"

"Can we, talk to Mike about me going back?"

Cam sighs, then comes and joins us on the sofa. "You're not well enough, Trace, you know that."

"But I haven't seen them for ages!"

"I know, love." Cam puts a hand on her shoulder. "But you need to be better before you go back to work."

"I'm sick and tired of being ill! I can't doanything!"

"I know. I know." Cam begins to rub Tracy's back. "But you've got to get your strength back before you go rushing into work and end up back in hospital."

Tracy sighs. Then tears filled her eyes.

"Oh Trace." Cam sighs too. "Come..."

I've taken Tracy before Cam has a chance. I can feel the pain in her body, the sadness that she can't see the kids. I hold her as the tears run down her cheeks.

"It's ok." I gently rub Tracy's back. "You'll get to see them soon, Tracy. They're not going anywhere."

"I know, I just miss them."

"I know you do."

Tracy cries for a few more moments, before she pulls away. She looks to Cam, and Cam wraps her in a hug.

As I watch them I have an idea.

"Tracy, did you want to write the kids a letter? I can read it to them, so they know you're thinking of them."

Tracy looks at me. "You'd do that?"

"Of course. And I think it would help you."

Tracy nods, then goes to get some paper.

Tracy sits at the table for a long time. I take the opportunity to talk to Cam, catching up with what she was doing before all this happened. She tells me about New York, giving us both something to distract us.

After a while Tracy hands me a piece of paper. "I don't want to listen to it. Am I ok to go to my room?"

"I won't read it aloud, but you can go if you want to." I turn the paper so Cam can read it too.

Carmen, Lily, Tee, Johnny, Frank, Gus, Elektra, Sapphire, Harry, Tyler,Rick,

I just wanted to say first of all, thank you for your cards. I'm sorry for not responding sooner, but they really meant a lot. I can see how hard you all worked on them, and they did help me to feel better.

I'm sorry I haven't been in. As you know, I haven't been well. I don't need to go into details, but needless to say it's been a lot. I know Mike and Gina told you I was very sad. I'm feeling a bit happier now, things are getting easier, but I just need a bit of time to recover properly.

I will come and see you as soon as I can, I promise. I want you to know it wasn't your fault, you didn't do anything wrong. I love all of you, and I can't wait to see you again. I miss you.

Be good for Mike and Gina, as I know you are being. Be good as you go back to school. I know it's sad the holidays are going to be over, but hopefully I'll be able to spend the next holidays with you.

And finally, if you're feeling sad, down, worried, anything at all, talk. Talk to Mike and Gina, talk to a friend. Don't do what I did. Make me proud by looking after yourselves until I get back.

All my love,

Tracy xxxxx

"That's lovely, Tracy." I give her a smile. "I'll read it to them when I get back."

She gives a small smile back.

"How long did you want me to stay? I'm free all afternoon, but I don't want to wear you out. Mike's told me how tired you are at the moment."

"Maybe just another half hour? I don't want to overdo it."

"Sounds good to me."

She joins Cam and I on the sofa.

"There's never much to talk about: I just don't do anything at the moment." Tracy sighs. "But it's a bit boring sitting in silence."

"I can tell you about what I've been up to, but only if it won't hurt you to hear about the kids."

"I'd like to know what they've been up to."

I spend some time telling Tracy about the holidays. About day trips and fun games and barbeques. As I tell the stories I can see in her eyes that she misses them, but I can also see her relief to know they've been having a good time.

As Tracy rests her head on Cam I look at the clock. It's been forty five minutes.

"Oh wow, that went quick!"

Tracy looks at the clock too. "I didn't even notice."

"Did you want me to take that letter to Elm Tree?"

"Yes please."

"Ok." I hesitate for a moment, before I pull her into a hug. "It was so lovely to see you, Tracy. Give me a ring anytime, ok?"

"I will. Thank you."

I give her a smile as I pull away. "Right, I'll be off. I'll see you later."

"See you later."

Cam shows me out of the house. "Thank you, for coming."

"It was my pleasure." I pause for a moment. "I'm around if you need me as well. Let me know if there's anything I can do. I know it's not been easy for you."

"I will."

I say goodbye to Cam, and then go out to my car, Tracy's letter in my bag. I have a feeling the kids are going to appreciate this.

"Hi Mike."

Mike looks up as I enter the office. "Gina. What are you doing back? How's Tracy? Has something happened?"

"No, nothing's happened, we had a good visit." I take Tracy's letter out of my bag. "I just wanted to read this to the kids."

"Can I see?"

I hand the letter to Mike.

As he reads it I can see him processing it. Obviously he's seen Tracy through all of this, but probably hasn't thought about her missing the kids in that time.

"She's still a good writer." Mike hands the letter back. "She hasn't lost that."

"Should we go and show them?"

"Yes. I know some of them have been worrying. I think it'll help."

I smile, going out into the hall. "House meeting!"

It's hard not to get a sense of deja vu. I think back to the last time we had a meeting like this, having to tell the kids that Tracy was in hospital. Thankfully this meeting is going to be more positive.

"Right," I say when everyone's arrived, unfolding the letter. "I've just been to see Tracy, and she wanted to send a message for you."

As I read I watch the kids. They seem happy that Tracy's doing better, but obviously they're still missing her presence.

As I finish I look up. "She really is missing you all. I know as soon as she's better she'll be back here to give you all hugs."

"When will she be better?" asks Carmen.

"I don't know. Hopefully it won't be too long. We'll let you know when she's coming in, obviously."

"But why don't you know?" asks Gus.

I sigh, looking to Mike. He gives me a look to handle this one.

I look back to the kids. "She's been very unwell. And recovery is slow, and different for every single person.

"But she came out of hospital weeks ago!" says Johnny.

"Three weeks ago, and we discharged her early." Mike has stood up to address the kids. "She's not well still. She's feeling happier, but she's still got a long way to go."

"So we're not going to see her for months?"

"She will come back when she's ready. She will come back before she's ready for work, I'm sure."

The kids look disappointed with Mike's answer, and I feel for them. I'm lucky that I've been able to see Tracy, but I know how much my visit took out of her, and she was able to be fully open with me, use me as support. She'll have to be better before the kids see her.

"I'm sorry, kids." I give them a smile. "I know how much you miss Tracy. But we can't have her ending up back in hospital. We all just need to be a bit patient, let her go at her pace."

"We wouldn't mean she had to go back to hospital," says Carmen. "She likes us, we can help her."

I sigh. "I've just been to see Tracy. And even with only me there she was stressed and worried she'd upset me, and she cried. You kids are noisy and rely on her. It would make things very difficult for her."

"But..." Johnny pipes up.

"ENOUGH!"

Mike has clearly reached his limit. He knows just how unwell she is, everything that's going on, from her body to her mind. He knows far more than I do, and even I can see that Tracy isn't up to seeing the kids.

The kids look worried. They know as well as I do that Mike doesn't raise his voice often. For him to raise it now, the situation must be pretty serious.

"She will be back when she's better," says Mike. "Until then I'm really sorry."

"We understand," says Lily. "We'll see her soon."

"It'll come sooner than you realise."

The kids still look disappointed, and I can understand why. But we have to put Tracy first. We can't have her going too far backwards, back to hospital. I'm not sure she'd survive a second attempt.

"Why don't we do something to cheer you all up? Any suggestions?"

Some of the kids shrug. Others don't answer me at all.

Mike sighs. "If you want to do something for Tracy I'll be going back there tomorrow. You can do things like that, we're just limiting visitors at the moment so we don't overwhelm her."

"Can we bake her something?" asks Tee.

Mike gives her a smile. "I think that's a wonderful idea. Do you all want to help?"

The kids make noises of agreement, beginning to get out the baking things.

I gesture for Mike to follow me to the office.

When we get there I show him to have a seat. He looks at me a little confused.

"It's not like you to shout at the kids."

He sighs. "I'm sorry."

"No, I didn't mean that." I look at him closely. "Is she ok? I think she put a front on for me today."

Mike sighs again. "She told Cam last night she still gets twinges of pain in her liver. She was in tears after your call but she insisted on getting dressed."

"She said she didn't feel presentable enough when I got there."

"I'm thankful she doesn't feel that need with Cam and me. She doesn't get dressed most days. It's just..." Mike put his head in his hands for a moment. "It's exhausting. I'm so glad I'm able to support her, and I know it's ten times worse for her, but it's a lot sometimes."

"Is there anything I can do?"

"I don't know. I'm just taking one day at a time at the moment. It's always unpredictable as to how she'll be, what she'll need. I have a feeling she'll spend tomorrow in bed."

"In bed?"

"She's exhausted, Gina. Your visit will have really worn her out. I know she would have loved seeing you, but she'll need some time to recover."

I sigh. I know Mike's told me she's been tired, but knowing my visit will lead to Tracy needing a day in bed hurts. The Tracy I know is bubbly and bouncy and full of energy and ideas and fun. The Tracy I saw today was tired and sad and full of trauma and worries and pain.

"She's not well, is she?"

"No. She's changed. I'm hoping she'll come back, be able to do everything she used to. But it's been so hard."

"Are you sure there's nothing I can do?"

"I don't think so. Cam and I have it pretty much covered. She just needs time, unfortunately. If you could just keep this place running like you have, that would be really helpful."

"Of course." I look to the door. "Should we see what mess the kids have made of the kitchen?"

Mike sighs, though there's a smile on his face.

I follow him out of the office.

The kitchen is cleaner than I was expecting. There's still flour everywhere, sticky fingerprints on the cupboards, a sprinkling of chocolate chips on the counter. But dough is being made, and I can see a recipe for cookies open.

"How many are you making?" I ask.

"The book says it makes twelve." Tee answers.

"Triple it. Then you can have some for tea too."

There are smiles as more ingredients go into the bowl.

I watch as the kids make the cookies, stirring the ingredients, rolling out the dough, cutting them out and adding more chocolate chips to the top of each. As each tray is ready I put it in the oven.

Once the cookies are out I leave them to cool.

"Can we make a little note to put on the box?" Tee seems to be leading the operation.

"Of course." I get out a tub from the cupboard. "Have you got any paper?"

She rushes off to the living room, then comes back with some paper and a box of pens. She writes a note, than decorates it.

I help the kids clear the kitchen as Tee writes, and watch as she calls the kids over one by one to add their names to the note.

By the time she is finished the kitchen is tidy. She sticks the note to the lid of the tub going to Tracy. "There."

Tracy

We thought you might like some cookies, to bring some sweetness to your day. We love you lots

Tee xx

There are other names scattered on the note, in between hearts and stars and flowers. I smile, knowing Tracy will appreciate the note as much as she will the treats inside.

"Can you put the cookies in when they're cool?"

"Of course."

Tee gives me a smile, before she follows the others out of the room.

I smile too, heading to the office. The cookies won't be ready to go in the box for a couple of hours, and there's something I need to do.

I hold the phone to my ear as it rings.

"Hello?"

"Hi Tracy."

"Gina? Is everything alright?" Tracy's voice has a hint of worry.

"Everything's fine. I just wanted to make sure you were ok after my visit."

"I'm ok." She pauses for a moment. "Why?"

"Mike said I might have worn you out. He said you're more unwell than you let on today."

Tracy sighs. "I am tired. But I'm alright. It was nice to see you."

"It was lovely to see you too." I smile. I can hear in Tracy's voice she's a little tired, but she sounds ok. I know Mike's told me about how ill she's been, and I can't hear that from her at the moment.

"Are the kids alright?"

"They've made some cookies for Mike to bring you tomorrow. They wanted to do something to cheer you up."

"Did you read the letter?"

"I did. They know you miss them."

I decide against telling Tracy how much the kids had been arguing to come and see her. As much as I know it would mean, I also know it will upset her at the moment.

There's some mumbling in the background. I hear Tracy decline something.

"You alright?"

"Yeah, Cam's just trying to sort dinner."

"And you're not having any?"

"I'm not hungry. I'll be ok."

I sigh. "Tracy, you've lost weight. I could see that as soon as I walked in today. You need to try and eat something."

"Will everyone stop bugging me about eating?"

"We just want you better, babes. We're just worried. No one's trying to have a go."

Tracy sighs. "I'm sorry. I know I need to eat. I just don't feel well."

"Did you want me to bring something round? I could stay and give the kids a curry night, save them from Mike's cooking, and bring some for you and Cam too?"

I know that curry night is a staple at Elm Tree, and that a sense of familiarity might help Tracy settle a little bit.

Tracy giggles at the idea of the kids being saved from Mike's cooking. Then there's a moment of silence.

Then Cam takes the phone. "That would be really appreciated if you wouldn't mind. I'm not sure I had the energy to cook tonight anyway."

"I'll go let Mike know not to start cooking then! I'll see you later."

There's more mumbling. I hear Cam ask if Tracy is sure.

"If you'd like to join us you're more than welcome. Rather than just dropping it off on the doorstep."

"Has Tracy got the energy for that?"

"She says she'll be ok. She can rest tomorrow."

"Ok. I'll pop round around half six?"

"Sounds good."

I say goodbye to Cam, and then hang up the phone. There is a smile on my face as I go to tell Mike I'll make dinner.

As I pack up the food into a bag after dinner I look around the kitchen, content. The kids were very happy with a surprise curry night, and I'm sure Tracy is going to be equally so. I put the cookies in the bag too, knowing those are going to be just as well received.

I turn to Mike as he clears the table. "Right, I'll be off for tonight. I'll see you tomorrow."

"See you tomorrow. Give her my love."

"I will."

I head out of the house and to my car. I just hope Tracy is going to be well enough.

I knock on the door when I get to their house.

Cam opens it. "Oh wow, is that all for us?"

"Dinner and dessert." I smile.

Cam shows me through to the kitchen. I note Tracy on the sofa. I smile as I see she's changed into pyjamas, happy to know she's more comfortable with me being here.

"Hi Gina."

"Hi Tracy." I start taking the containers out. "Loving the outfit choice, I should have brought mine!"

I see her relax at my words. I could sense she was a little nervous still about not being dressed with me coming, and I'm so glad to have been able to reassure her that I couldn't care less what she's wearing as long as she's comfortable.

Cam and I dish up the food, and Tracy joins us at the table. Cam has given her a small portion, obviously used to how much Tracy's stomach can handle at the moment.

As we begin to eat I tell Cam and Tracy about the cookie making. Tracy giggles, knowing the state the kitchen gets in when the kids decide to do baking.

"And they were very glad for the curry night. Harry even cheered!"

Tracy giggles again. "I remember when I was a kid and Mike had to take over the cooking, we got to the point that I just had to say "me again" when I called the local takeaway."

"Well thankfully he's improved since then!"

"Yes, the meals are sometimes edible now!"

"I don't think you're one to talk, Tracy. You put banana on pizza on your first night as a care worker!" Cam joins the conversation.

"That was your fault! You put them in my bag, what else was I supposed to do with them?"

"I don't know why you didn't just bring them home!"

I laugh as I think about that night. It was stressful at the time, but I know I was too harsh on Tracy. She handled it well, even if we did have an epidemic team arrive for Mike!

I keep a discreet eye on Tracy as we continue to eat, and am very glad to see her finish her portion. Cam and I are still eating.

"Can I have some more please?"

"Of course." Cam gets up, taking Tracy's plate. She puts a little more on it and then hands it back.

I give Tracy a smile. "I knew you wouldn't be able to resist the curry."

Tracy smiles back.

We continue to eat. Cam tells me about some writing she's been doing since she got home, a new children's novel. I listen with great interest.

As we finish our meals I am once again glad to see Tracy's plate empty. Cam clears the plates as I get the box of cookies. I place it in front of Tracy.

She reads the note on top. I watch as her face crumples, and she puts her head in her hands.

"Oh Tracy." Cam rushes over, putting a hand on her shoulder. "What's wrong, sweetheart?"

"I just miss them so much."

"I didn't mean it to upset you, Tracy. I'm sorry." I put my hand on her other shoulder.

"It's not your fault." Tracy sniffles. "I just wish I could see them."

"You'll be able to soon, I'm sure."

Tracy takes a moment to calm, before she takes her hands away from her face. She opens the box of cookies, smiling as she sees them. "They're lovely. They must have worked hard."

"They took great care over them."

"Did you want one now?" Cam takes the box and puts it on the side.

"Maybe later. I'm a little full."

Cam gives her a smile as she puts the lid back on.

Tracy makes her way to the sofa. I sit down next to her.

"Thank you for bringing the curry. It was good."

"You're very welcome." I give her a smile. "Well done for eating it."

Tracy gives me a small smile.

Cam comes to join us. "I'll do the washing up when you're gone."

"Nonsense." I stand up, going over to the sink. "It's only a few plates, I'll sort it."

I spend a few minutes washing up, and place everything on the rack to dry. As I come back Cam holds a finger to her lips.

Tracy is resting on her shoulder, fast asleep. Cam gently strokes her hair.

"Is she ok?"

"Just tired. She'll be alright." She smiles. "At least she's got some food in her."

"Is there anything I can do?"

"If you could just hold her for a moment, then I can lie her down."

I do as I'm told, gently holding Tracy as Cam stands up and moved a cushion. We then lie Tracy down, and Cam gets a blanket, laying it on top of her.

"Is she alright there?"

Cam sighs. "I can't lift her. Mike moves her when he's here. She's slept on the sofa a few times now though, she'll be ok."

"And are you alright?"

Cam gives me a smile. Then her face falls. I give her a hug as she starts to cry.

"I'm here if you want to get things off your chest. I don't think Mike's told me about everything that's been going on, and he certainly hasn't told me what's going on in your head."

"I..." Cam chokes out a sob.

I gently lead her to the table, guiding her to a chair. I take the chair next to her, placing my arm round her shoulders.

"Talk to me. About anything you like."

Cam begins to offload. Some things I was aware of, others Mike hasn't told me. She tells me of how sick Tracy was in hospital, how in the first couple of weeks home the house was on lockdown, Tracy on constant watch at times as the suicidal thoughts took over. How Tracy's been struggling with the most basic things.

"She hasn't been herself for so long, Gina. You have no idea how much you coming has settled her. I know she's tired and she's going to have to deal with that, but you've brought some normality back."

"I didn't realise she was that ill."

"Has Mike not been giving you updates?"

"He has, just... I didn't realise it was that bad. He didn't say about the lockdown."

"Her mattress is still on the floor. I'm hoping I can put it back up tonight. She wouldn't sleep in her bed because it wasn't safe."

"It sounds like you've been dragged through hell and back."

"It's been worse for Tracy."

I place my hand on hers. "It's been horrific for you too. I'm here, if you need me. "Have you got my number?"

"Tracy's got the number for Elm Tree."

"Has she got my personal number?"

"I don't know. I don't think so. But you don't have to give me that."

"I'd like to. You and Tracy need all the support you can get right now."

Cam's eyes are brimming with tears again. "Thank you."

"Have you got a bit of paper?"

"Um, I, there's a note block on the counter."

I spot it. I get up and write my number on a piece of pink paper, then tear it off and hand it to Cam. "There. Then you can put it in your phone. Ring anytime about anything. Tell Tracy the same." I pause for a moment. "Did you want a hand with the mattress?"

"Oh, no, I couldn't..."

"You wanted it back up tonight?"

"Tracy did say she'd be willing to try it earlier."

"Come on then. Which is her room?"

Cam leads me through to Tracy's room. She goes in, then pulls the mattress out the way of the door.

As I enter the room it's was like a window into the past few weeks. Bedding in a heap, a pile of letters on the desk from her mental health team, a tub of shredded paper, the bin half full of snack wrappers, and a couple of plates on her bedside table.

"I always forget to clear away when she eats in here." Cam moves the plates onto the desk. "Right, should we get this mattress up?"

Together we lift the mattress off the floor and placed it on the bed. Cam places the bedding on top.

"I meant to change these, really. I'll do it later."

"Where do you keep the covers?"

"Gina, really, I..."

"You're just as tired as she is, Cam." I interrupt her, putting my hand on her shoulder. "Let me help out for this evening. I'm here, I might as well."

Cam sighs. "In a cupboard in the bathroom, next door on the right."

I go and locate some bedding, then change Tracy's sheets. I can hear Cam washing up the plates.

I come back into the main room, giving her a smile. "All done."

Cam gives me a smile.

I look back to Tracy. She's still fast asleep.

"Is there anything else that needs doing?"

"I need to argue with her mental health team, but I'll do that tomorrow."

"Argue?"

"The idiots have discharged her."

My eyes widen. "Discharged?"

Cam shakes her head. "I don't know. She told them she wasn't stable enough for therapy, which I entirely agree with, and that she doesn't want medication because it doesn't work. And so she got a letter a couple of days ago to say if she needs help to go back to them but that as there's nothing they can do, they're discharging her."

My heart aches for Tracy. Even asleep on the sofa I can see she clearly isn't well.

"Absolute morons. It's like they want her to die."

"That's not going to happen."

Cam sighs. "I hope not. We seem to be a little more out of the woods. Not having to grab things off her or restrain her anymore, thank goodness."

"Restrain her?"

"Mike had to a couple of times. That was terrifying. She screamed the house down." She sighs. "I'm sorry, you don't want to hear all this."

"I do if it's helpful to tell me."

"I just..." Cam sighs. "It was such a shock. I was in New York and then I got a text from Mike and suddenly I needed to come back home because Tracy had tried to die and might have been dead when I got back and then I got to her and it was like I barely knew her. She's slowly coming back but she's been so lost. It's just been a lot to deal with. And I just miss her."

"She's definitely not like she was at the moment. But it's only been a few weeks. She'll get better. She's a fighter, your Tracy."

"She has been fighting extremely hard."

"You all have by the sounds of it."

"Poor Mike's in work too. I can't even imagine having a job at the moment."

"That means you've taken the brunt of this though. Mike's doing ok."

Cam sighs.

"Is there anything else I can do?"

"I don't think so. I need to clean the place really, but I can't while Tracy's asleep in here. There's nothing urgent that needs doing."

"Ok." I look to my watch, and see time has gone quicker than I expected. "I might head home then, if that's ok."

"Of course. Thank you again, for the meal, and for the help, and just for coming at all."

"It's been lovely to see you both." I go over to Tracy, and give her a gentle kiss on the forehead, then stroked her hair a couple of times. "Sleep well, babes." Then I turn to Cam and give her a hug. "Take care of yourself. Like I said, ring me if you need me."

Cam hugs me back tightly. "Thank you."

She shows me out, and we say our goodbyes. I turn to look as she closes the door behind her.

I go to my car, happiness and sadness mixing inside of me. Of course I'm glad I was able to help, was glad that Tracy has eaten something, and glad that she's was slowly on the mend. But to see how quickly she fell asleep, see how upset Cam is, and hear about everything that's gone on makes my heart break a little.

I drive home, knowing Tracy is going to be on my mind tonight.

I spend the evening sorting my own home, Greg having told me this morning he'd be out with some work friends tonight. As night draws near my phone pings.

She's in bed. Not on the floor. She's barely used her bed since she's been back. Thank you for coming, and for helping. She's a lot more settled. Hope you sleep well

I smile at Cam's text. Knowing I was able to help them both means the world.

I'm so glad I was able to help. Get some sleep yourself, hope you have a restful night

I put my phone down, and go into the dark kitchen, looking out of the window. There are so many stars in the sky tonight, each one shining down on us.

As one shoots across the sky I close my eyes, making a wish for Tracy to make a full recovery.

I know she's capable of it anyway. Like I said to Cam, she's a fighter. She'll get through this.

I know I can't spend much time with her, that I have to run Elm Tree, almost having taken on position of head care worker while Mike's been juggling the two. But I know I'll be here if they need me.

As I watch the stars for a moment more I smile. They often say that stars are loved ones watching down on you. It's a sweet sentiment, though I'm not sure how much I believe it. I do know one thing for certain though, even if she's not certain of it herself.

Tracy's not going to join them just yet.