[KING'S LANDING, CERSEI'S CHAMBERS]
[PODRICK PAYNE pours wine for TYRION, who is seated at a table. QUEEN CERSEI LANNISTER stands in the background. TYRION removes his napkin from his neck and wipes his face.
"Excellent lamprey pie. Were you slaving away in the kitchen all day? I hear Joffrey plans on fighting. An inspiration for the troops. The young king in his shining armour fighting to defend the capital against the wicked old rebel."
"He's only a boy."
Brandon snorted. Women of the South were too soft with their children. If it were his mother she'd have sent him without any doubts.
"Younger boys are off fighting his war."
"He's not ready."
"If he is not ready at that age, I question the Master at Arms you have at the capital" Olenna Tyrell stated snidely.
"It's less about the Master at Arms and more about Cersei not allowing Joffrey to learn properly. Any injury done was punished severely, so people did not try to fight properly in training with him" Jaime explained with a sigh. He had once tried to talk about this with his sister, but Cersei had shut him up with choice words.
"Stupid woman" Olanne grunted and Brandon smiled.
Perhaps Branond had been too hasty in judging all the women in the South,
"What is he, seventeen? Remember Jaime at seventeen?"
"Better than you. Some men have a gift for this sort of thing, some don't. His place is not on the battlefield."
"It's not on the throne, either, sadly for all of us."
"You are too carefree about what you say or how you act. Your sister hates you, and your nephew, the King, despises you. You won't be hand for long and I don't think your father would still have a hand out to help you" Elia pointed out grimly.
"I always find a way to save myself, worry not Princess" Tyrion smiled tightly.
"You shipped off my only daughter. And now you want to send my eldest son to the battlefield to die."
"He'll have his Kingsguard protecting him. He has the finest armour gold can buy. He needs to be out there. The men will fight more fiercely seeing their king fighting beside them instead of hiding behind his mother's skirts. Any dessert?"
"Do you know why Varys is so dangerous?"
"I am flattered she thinks so" Varys muttered.
"Because he has thousands of spies in his employ. Because he knows everything we do before we do it."
"Because he doesn't have a cock."
"I am certain Lord Tyrion's assessment is a better one" the Master of Spies muttered, a little insulted by Cersei's assessment.
"Neither do you."
"Perhaps I'm dangerous, too."
Tyrion snorted.
"You, on the other hand, are as big a fool as every other man. That little worm between your legs does half your thinking.
Tyrion scratched his head, unsure of what to say.
"Well... she's something" Tyrion finally muttered, to the amusement of his brother and mother.
[CERSEI laughs and sits]
"Because I have your little whore."
"I thought you preferred blondes."
"Such a droll little fellow. Tell me, have you married this one yet? No? Good. Father will be so pleased."
"I'm sure him learning of who you fuck will please him so" Tyrion muttered darkly. He wasn't angry that she'd found a person his future self cared for, he was angry Cersei thought herself clever enough to think she could walk away from this with no repercussions. If she was here he'd kill her for sure. He'd had enough of the woman.
"Why do you care who I fuck?"
"Because a Lannister always pays her debts. You stole my only daughter, you plot to have Joffrey killed."
"This is madness. Stannis will be here in days. You need me."
"For what? Your skill in battle?"
"That idiot would rather give leadership to some imbecile like her son than trust me to protect them all" Tyrion fumed.
"You didn't leave her much choice" Myrcella pointed out. "You sent me away without telling her about it directly. She has no reason to trust you."
Tyrion's brows furrowed.
"Pretty thing, your whore. Lovely body. The bruises will heal in time."
"Where did you find her?"
"Varys isn't the only one who hears whispers. Really, a Lannister lion necklace? You need to hide your secret whores more carefully."
Jaime raised a brow.
"You're an idiot," Joanna said blandly, unimpressed by her youngest.
Tyrion for his part lowered his head to hide the blush. He was an idiot.
"You've forgotten the most important thing about whores."
"Oh? Well, you're the expert. Tell me."
"You don't buy them, you only rent them."
|You're usually a better liar, baby brother. This one you like. You like her very much. Could it be love? Don't worry, she'll be treated gently enough. Unless Joffrey is hurt. And then every wound he suffers, she'll suffer, too. And if he dies, there isn't a man alive who could devise a more painful death for your little cunt."
"And how do I know you haven't killed her already?"
"Would you like to see her? I thought you might. Ser Mandon, bring in my brother's whore."
[SER MANDON MOORE moves behind her and opens the chamber door. TYRION looks worried. Two guards bring in ROS, rather than SHAE. TYRION looks her over.]
Tyrion snorted before guffawing.
"That idiotic whore!" the imp laughed.
"Tyrion—"
"Please be a bit more civilised uncle, that is my mother" Myrcella hissed.
Tyrion stopped laughing and stared at his niece before sighing.
"Apologies. Your mother and I—"
"We know. So hold your tongue around me about her, please" the girl whispered and looked away.
Tyrion frowned at the girl.
[The guards take her away. CERSEI looks pleased.]
"I will hurt you for this. A day will come when you think you're safe and happy, and your joy will turn to ashes in your mouth. And you will know the debt is paid."
"You are an idiot" Joanna parroted her earlier statement.
Tyrion waved her off with a scowl. He meant every word of it. Why would he not say it?
[THE RIVERLANDS]
[ROBB and LORD ROOSE BOLTON sit in conference.]
"Still no word?"
"We've sent a dozen ravens. None have returned. My bastard is only a few days from Winterfell. Once he captures the castle—"
"Theon has my brothers. If we storm the castle"
"You don't know yet" Arya said to Robb.
"Aye…" Robb muttered. He wasn't sure how he'd react if he found out.
"He wouldn't dare hurt the boys. They're his only hope of escaping the North with his head."
"If he had a brain up there, he'd think like that too" Oberyn cackled.
Theon fisted his hands and glared at the ground. Why hadn't he thought of that? No, he had thought of it. He knew he did. Why had he let his anger have the best of him?!
"Send word to your son. Any Ironborn who surrender will be allowed to return safely to their homes."
Many raised their brows in question, Robb included.
"A touch of mercy is a virtue, Your Grace. Too much-"
"Any Ironborn with the exception of Theon Greyjoy. He betrayed our cause. He betrayed me. And we will hunt him down no matter where he runs."
"That makes sense" Brandon the Elder muttered.
"I expect his countrymen will turn on him the minute they hear the offer."
[TALISA enters. They stand. ROOSE BOLTON exits.]
"How are you?"
"How am I? I've had to arrest my mother."
Catelyn flinched.
"The Lannisters have my sisters. The man I considered my closest friend has seized my home and my brothers."
Theon flinched.
"I'm fighting a war and I don't know if I should march south or north."
"Always secure home before you take more" Rickard advised the young man. "A King with no home is no King, remember that."
Robb nodded.
"I'm sorry. It was a stupid question. I'm sorry."
"No. Forgive me. You're being kind. I have no right."
"You have every right. You're a king."
"That's not the kind of king I want to be."
"What kind do you want to be?"
"I don't know. The good kind. Most kings grew up as princes. They spend their whole lives preparing for the crown. I was raised to be Lord of Winterfell."
"And I the Lord of Storm's End. You do what you can to the best of your abilities, and you keep people you trust close and listen when they advise you. Something I have failed many times at doing, but you should not" Robert advised.
Robb nodded again, taking in all the advice he could.
"I was raised to be a proper little lady, to play the harp and dance the latest steps and recite Valyrian poetry."
"I'd like to hear you play the harp."
"No. No, you would not."
[They laugh. ROBB pours some wine and hands it to her.]
"How did you go from reciting Valyrian poetry to sawing off men's feet?"
"When I was twelve, my mother and father went to a wedding. Weddings in Volantis last for days, you know. And they left me with my little brother. The second afternoon they were gone was the hottest day in the three-year summer. We couldn't bear to be inside, so we ran down to the Rhoyne. Every child in Volantis was in the Rhoyne that day. The rich, the poor, we were all there. Naked, screaming, racing to the little islands. Drummers were playing for coppers on the east bank. I was treading water, talking to a friend, when I realized I hadn't seen my brother. I called his name. Then I started screaming his name. And then I saw him floating face down. My heart just stopped. I dragged him from the water. My friend helped me, I think. I don't even remember. He was so little. Then we pulled him onto the riverbank. And I screamed at him and I shook him. And he was dead. Just dead. A man ran over. He had a fish tattoo on his face. In Volantis, the slaves have tattoos. So you know what they are without having to talk to them. And this man worked on a fishing boat. And he pushed me out of the way. You have to understand, for a slave to push a highborn girl, that's death for the man, a terrible death. But he pushed me out of the way, and he started pressing on my brother's chest again and again and again until my brother spat out half of the Rhoyne and cried out. And the man cradled his head and told him to be calm. I decided two things that day. I would not waste my years planning dances and masquerades with the other noble ladies. And when I came of age, I would never live in a slave city again."
"It is always the experiences that put death before us that change our lives forever" Brynden muttered.
"Have you gone through something similar?" Rhaegar questioned.
"Mayhaps" Brynden shrugged.
Rhaegar frowned at the non-answer.
"I'm sorry, Your Grace. You told me of your problems and I've blathered on."
"I don't want to marry the Frey girl."
"I don't want you to marry her. But you needed that bridge. I hope it's a very beautiful bridge."
[They kiss passionately, and undress one another in a fury. They make love on the floor.]
"Ned, brother, I love you, truly I do, but what is this?!" Brandon the Elder snapped. "You have your wife meddling in war affairs and releasing the most important prisoner you have and you have your son fucking some random woman from Volantis claiming she's a noble! What's next? They marry and your son loses himself another ally?!"
Angry as he might be with Brandon, Ned couldn't help but stare at Robb, who was doing his best to hide. He prayed Robb did not do something stupid… like his mother had done.
[HARRENHAL COURTYARD, NIGHT]
Doran and Oberyn leaned forward with curiosity. They wanted to see what that Faceless Man was going to do now. Will he help or is he luring the girl into a trap to save himself and fulfil whatever mission he is on?
"The sour cherries was all crushed up and ready."
"Shut up."
"Probably in the piecrust by now. In the oven. The nice, warm oven."
"Shut up. What did you bring?"
"The cheese could be better. I did get some nice sausages."
"What did he want us to do about those guards?"
"He didn't say. He just said, Walk through the gates."
"What about the guards?"
"He didn't say anything about the guards."
"What, he left that bit out? It's a pretty important part, don't you think?"
"We have to trust him."
"Why? Because he killed someone for you?" Sansa asked her sister.
"I don't know what she is thinking!" Arya argued.
"Of course you do! It's you!"
"Girls enough" Ned said somberly and both girls shut up.
"Trust him? You trusted him to fight with us when you set him free and he ran."
Sansa threw Arya a look.
"I want to go back to the kitchens."
"Shut up. Stay here if you're afraid."
[ARYA gets up and walks towards the gate. GENDRY and HOT PIE follow. When they reach the guards, they realize that all have been slaughtered. They walk through the gate.]
Arya threw Sansa a look.
Oberyn and Doran both stared with a small frown. The assassin was doing too much. What was his angle?"
[STANNIS'S FLEET]
"I admire you, Ser Davos."
"I thank you, Your Grace."
"Pleased to hear it. Some highborn fools call you Onion Knight and think they insult you. So you take the onion for your sigil, sew it on your coat, fly the onion flag."
"My son wishes me to change it. Three mermen with tridents, something like that. I understand why the older families look down at me."
"Do you? Why?"
"Because he was a smuggler?" Renly asked sarcastically.
"Ser Davos has paid for his crimes and now leads a better life" Shireen defended the Onion Knight with a glare.
"And what does that change, girl?" Renly stared boredly, "Any Lord of good standing will not see him and accept him as one of them because of his past.
Shireen glared at her uncle but said nothing since her Father forbade it with a look.
"My father was a crabber."
"And?"
"Well, sons of lords don't like to break bread with sons of crabbers. Our hands stink."
"And where were those lords when Storm's End starved?"
"Many fought bravely for your brother. Many fought for the Mad King."
"You defend these men who insult you behind your back."
"Some are happy to do it to my face."
"We were forgotten. Robert and Ned Stark, they were the heroes. The glorious rebels marching from battle to battle, liberating towns from the yoke of the Mad King, while I held Storm's End with five hundred men."
Both men in question shifted uncomfortably. True as it was, neither wished for a reminder of that time.
"No one has forgotten, Your Grace."
"No? Robert did. He gave Storm's End to Renly after the war. Renly never fought a day in his life."
"You were my heir, and Dragonstone is the seat of the heir" Robert clarified.
"A Targaryen heir. You are a Baratheon. Why not change that?" Stannis challenged.
Robert had nothing to say to that.
"He was only a boy."
"Then why'd he give him Storm's End?"
Robert's frown deepened.
"First, we ate the horses. We weren't riding anywhere, not with the castle surrounded. We couldn't feed them, so fine, the horses. Then the cats. Never liked cats. So fine. I do like dogs. Good animals. Loyal. But we ate them. Then the rats. And then you made it through the lines. Slipped right through in your little black sailboat with your onions."
Renly frowned. Had it been that bad? He had been young, it was no surprise he wouldn't remember it, but listening to Stannis say it… Stannis never exaggerated…
"And potatoes. Some salted beef, I believe."
"Every man in Storm's End wanted to kiss you that night."
"I was relieved they did not."
"Robert told me to hold Storm's End, so I held it. Then he told me he was giving it to Renly, so I gave it up. Insult or no, I gave it up. Because Robert was my older brother, and he was the king and I've always done my duty. But now, I'm the rightful king by every law of Westeros. And when I sit the Iron Throne, you'll be my Hand."
"Your Grace, I pray I serve you well."
"I expect you'll be the first crabber's son to wear the badge."
"You trust him greatly" Robert noted.
"He is loyal and unashamedly frank about his thoughts. He is someone whose company you will yourself enjoy" Stannis explained.
That was high praise coming for the man.
Robert took note of it.
[QARTH]
[DAENERYS TARGARYEN peers through a boarded entryway. SER JORAH MORMONT approaches.]
"Careful, Khaleesi. Xaro owns this city and the warlocks have a thousand eyes watching for you. I found one. A ship with a good captain. She leaves for Astapor tomorrow."
"Astapor?"
"We cannot stay here."
"Is this man stupid? How is he even thinking about leaving the dragons?!" the reminder of the dragons still missing ignited a fire in Rhaegar. "You dare not leave the dragons, Daenerys."
"Shut up" the Princess muttered.
"I'm sorry?" Rhaegar narowe dhis eyes.
"I said shut up!" Daenerys screamed at him, shocking him. "You do not get to say a single thing to me about what choices I can or can't make. Nor do you get to judge what actions I commit, now or in the future."
"You will doom the world!" Rhaegar said with outrage. "Those dragons are our only way—"
"You are dead!" hissed Daenerys. "You dare to sit and judge me while it's your fault House Targaryen lost their seat! You were the one to run off with Lyanna Stark and hide while the realm descended into war!"
"What does that have to do with this?!" Rhaegar snapped.
"Everything! You care for no one but yourself, you care not about what happens to your wife and children, as evident you left them. You care little about what happens to your siblings! You care more about Dragons than what happens to me! What if I had been there when they came to take my dragons? What if they'd kill me too!"
"Daenerys! I—"
"Ou will not speak to me until I want to speak to you. You will not come close to me or speak about me to anyone! You will stay away with your prophecy and blame everything on everyone when you could have prevented all of which happened to our family if you used your fucking head for once! Now you sit here and act like you're better than me, that you'd have done things better than I and pick at my mistakes when you're the reason I'm in that situation, to begin with!" Daenerys inhaled deeply. "You're a waste of space and air, Rhaegar."
The Prince was too stunned to speak. He couldn't believe what his sister was saying… none of it made sense! How was it his fault she'd lost the dragons? How was it his fault that she was prepared to risk the world for herself? How could she be so selfish?!
"They have my dragons. A mother does not flee without her children."
"They're not your children. I know they call you the Mother of Dragons and I know you love them, but you didn't grow them in your womb. They didn't suckle at your breast. They are dragons, Khaleesi. And if we stay in Qarth, we'll die."4
"You should sail to Astapor. I'm sure you'll be safe there."
"You know I would die for you."
"He says that, but he speaks like a craven" Jaime muttered.
"I will never abandon you. I'm sworn to protect you, to serve."
"Then serve me. If my dragons are in the House of the Undying, then take me there."
"That's what the warlock wants. He told you so himself. If you enter that place, you will never leave again. His magic is strong."
"And what of my magic? You saw me step into the fire. You watched the witch burn. What did the flames do to me? Do you remember?"
"Until my last breath, I will remember. After I have forgotten my mother's face."
"He's so smitten" Olenna rolled her eyes. The Targaryen needed loyal men, not men who have a boner at the sight of her.
"They are my children. And they are the only children I will ever have. Take me to them."
[WINTERFELL]
"We should bury them."
"I'd leave 'em up a few more days. Sends a message."
"Fucking savages" Jon muttered under his breath. Lyanna gripped his hand and squeezed it.
Jon smiled at her tightly.
"If they haven't got the damn message yet, a few more days won't help."
"As you say. But it don't hurt to let 'em rot a while longer. What's this?"
"Gold for the farmer. For his trouble."
"His troubles are done. He's feeding the crops now."
Ned's eyes hardened at the Ironborn. Not Theon, the other. The devil on the boy's shoulder.
[MAESTER LUWIN approaches and looks at THEON and DAGMER.]
"His wife, too. You want to keep a man silent, you silence him."
[LUWIN walks over to look at the burned bodies of BRAN and RICKON.]
[CUT TO DARKNESS]
[OSHA lights a candle.]
"She's alive" Catelyn sat up. She left them. The fucking whore left them!
"Got as far as the farm and then doubled back. Walked through the stream to throw off the hounds. Hoped this would be the last place they'd think to look."
Ned's eyes narrowed. He dared not hope. Yet…
"You're right so far."
"Who was that out there hung up at the gates?"
"Must have been the farmer's boys."
Catelyn and Ned sucked in a sharp breath.
"He killed them and burned them and passed them off as the little lords?"
"They mustn't know. Bran would blame himself."
"They'll never hear it from me. The little lads have suffered enough."
[LORD BRAN STARK sits just out of sight, having heard everything. HODOR and RICKON STARK sleep.]
Catelyn let out a strangled cry before embracing her son, who was equally in shock. He was alive… Theon did not kill him. He was alive! But… but two boys died because of him… He didn't know whether he could forgive himself… or Theon… Even if he hadn't done it yet.