s12. April deals with an upsetting case at work and Jackson comforts her.
It feels like deja vu in the worst way when her trauma patient loses her baby.
Arizona and Alex had done everything they could to get a pulse, yet nothing had worked. She was gone, and all April could focus on was the sound of the mother's tears and pleas, desperate for some sort of miracle.
April's hands shake, and she feels herself beginning to spiral as she repeats how sorry she is to the mother. Arizona and Alex give her knowing looks, motioning for her to step away for a moment.
Jackson, who is currently trying to stitch up someone's arm across the ER, notices April leaving and looks confused. He can hear the patient's sobs and Arizona manages to make eye contact. Her face says it all: the case was upsetting, and he makes a mental note to go find his ex-wife when he's done with his patient.
He finds her sitting on a bench outside of the hospital, having heard her crying before he actually spotted her, and notices her hand on her stomach. It's the same bench they'd sat on together once when she was pregnant with Samuel, and it makes his chest hurt just thinking about it.
"Hey, you okay?" He asks gently, watching as he quickly tries to wipe away her tears. He knows that things aren't exactly the way they used to be between them, but they'd reached a good place within the last few weeks. They weren't fighting anymore, and she was being more open with him. It felt like a good start.
"Uhm, y-yeah, I'll be fine," She insists, but Jackson isn't convinced, so he sits down next to her. April sighs through her tears, shaking her head for a moment, "Okay, I'm not fine. My patient...her baby died...and I...I couldn't be in there...not right now."
Jackson looks at her sympathetically, wanting to take away her pain, "I know. I get it."
April continues, "I just...I'm so scared. I know I've been so positive for most of this pregnancy, wanting to believe it'll all be okay and praying to God that it is, but that just...brought back memories. What if something happens, Jackson? During the delivery? What if I can't do this?"
She looks at him for a moment, wiping her cheek again. It feels good to get things off her chest, but she also doesn't want to worry him, knowing how reluctant he was about this pregnancy in the first place.
"Look, April, I might not believe in the same things you do, but I believe that you'll be okay and that you can do this. We can do this, and this baby is going to be happy and healthy, okay? I believe that too, and I'm gonna be here for you anyway that I can."
April takes in his words for a moment, before nodding slightly, feeling herself calm down a little, "T-Thank you."
She surprises him for a moment by taking one of his hands to hold onto, "Uhm, could you just stay with me for a few minutes? I'm not ready to go back in yet."
He looks at her softly, before answering, "Sure. Whatever you need."