"Can you believe in all that time we never did this?"
Jack chuckled, "I know, as much time that we spent on roofs you'd think it would've been inevitable"
They were wrapped in Jack's coat, which by some feat of engineering that Ianto could never understand would fit Jack like a glove but also comfortably accommodate the two of them in each other's arms. Ianto's head leaned on Jack's shoulder, casually trailing patterns on his chest with his fingertips. Jack's arm wrapped around the younger man, his hand resting on his hip as if it had never left.
Ianto coughed quietly, "So are we going to talk about what this was or?"
"Do we need to stick a label on it?" Jack said lightly, not really wanting to get into those kinds of thoughts,
"Guess we never did before, did we" Ianto murmured, "you hate the word couple, after all"
Jack stiffened, "That's not what I meant" he said darkly, "I just don't know where we stand right now, Ianto. It's been a long time, there's a lot we don't know about each other"
"You're right" Ianto said bluntly, shifting to face away from Jack, who let the man move but kept a hand wrapped protectively around him, instinctively afraid to let him go,
"But that doesn't mean I regret what happened" Jack said quickly, "Ianto, I…"
"I think we've probably been gone long enough" Ianto pulled away completely and reached for his clothes. Jack nodded, turning to reach for his own. They dressed in silence, facing away from each other, the heat of the moment dissipated. They had come together in a passion that had lasted throughout the years apart, and there would always be feelings between the two of them. But neither of them was naive enough to think things could just go immediately back to the way things were. Too much had happened, twenty years was a very long time to forgive.
X-X-X
The cog door sounded as it always had as they entered the hub, and as Gwen looked up she felt the warmth of familiarity at the sight of the two men walking in. They weren't hand in hand, but there was an air between them, almost an understanding, even if it was buried beneath the questions right now. And of course Gwen was very much acquainted with the sight of post-coital Jack and Ianto, noting how Ianto's hair was ruffled and Jack's shirt was creased. She raised an eyebrow in amusement as they approached,
"Welcome back boys"
"Don't say a word" Ianto said tightly
"Oh I wouldn't dare" she grinned, "Evelyn's gone back to mine with Anwen. She was going to stay the night there, take some time"
Ianto nodded, "of course"
"I want to see her" said Jack, "at least to apologise for running off like that"
"She understood" Gwen smiled softly, "She's asked to see you tomorrow. Get to know you properly. Thought you might need the night to process it all"
"you could say that" Jack ran his hand wearily through his hair, sinking down onto the sofa. There was a moment of silence where Gwen looked between the two men, and knew she had to intervene. These were two of the people she loved most in the world, after all.
"Right" Gwen clapped her hands together, "I propose we order pizza, open some beers, and just have it all out right here".
Ianto looked to Jack for confirmation, who nodded in acceptance. Immediately Ianto headed off to sort out the pizza, glad that the local place had developed with the times and continued delivering. Some things didn't change, Ianto thought with a sad smile.
Gwen sidled closer to Jack as they watched him go,
"all very familiar isn't it? Ianto organising the food with his hair all messed up like… Jack" she caught herself as she noticed the tears streaming down his cheeks,
"I just… he's alive, Gwen" Jack gasped, "More than that, he's alive forever"
"I know it's a lot" Gwen touched his arm, "we honestly thought we were doing the right thing. He thought you'd move on and be happy and…"
"I didn't" Jack said bitterly, "I mean, yeah, there've been the odd fling or whatever but…I have never moved on. Even if I deny it and push it away, if I make a point of avoiding labels, He is the love of my long, long life".
"Does he know that?"
Jack shook his head, "if he did he wouldn't have kept all of this from me for so long would he"
"No, I guess not" Gwen agreed, "I'm sorry, Jack"
"I forgive you" Jack said, "And I'll forgive him, eventually. There's just so much I want to know. About his life, your life, our…daughter, God I can't believe I'm even saying that word"
"Tonight we can talk about all of that, whatever you want to ask I will answer"
"As will I" Ianto said as he walked back up to the pair, "No more secrets, Jack, I promise"
Jack nodded, subtly wiping his eyes, "Ok, good. Can see this being an all nighter"
Ianto grinned, "Good thing I've put the coffee on then"
Jack's eyes widened, "Oh my God the coffee!"
He bounded to the kitchenette excitedly, Ianto smiling fondly as he followed the man. Everything was updated to a modern and functional kitchen leaps and bounds ahead of the dingy little space they had before. But centred on the counter sat a huge coffee machine, and Jack inhaled contentedly as the familiar scent hit him,
"There is nothing in the universe that can beat the smell of your coffee, Ianto Jones"
Ianto chuckled, "I try my best. If you move I'll pour you a cup"
Jack stepped dutifully aside to let Ianto at the machine. Within a few seconds he'd worked some coffee magic and presented Jack with a cup. Jack grasped the cup gratefully and took a deep breath before bringing it to his lips. As soon as the steaming liquid hit his tongue Jack welled up at the familiarity of the taste, so distinctively Ianto that it almost hurt. He closed his eyes as he savoured the mouthful. Ianto watched on as Jack took a sip, his eyes misting up at the sight.
"I never thought i'd taste this again" Jack smiled, and in seeing that smile Ianto crumpled.
"Jack I... I'm so.." he broke down, and Jack was there in a second pulling the man into his arms.
"Hey, hey" Jack held the man into his chest, tucking him under his chin, "I know. I can't tell you I'm not hurt, or confused. But I know you, and I know you thought you were doing the best thing for everyone. Its going to take time to come to terms with all this. But you have to hear something"
He placed his hands on Ianto's shoulders, pulling him so they were looking into each other's eyes, the gaze intense and loving and nostalgic.
"I love you" Jack murmured, "I have loved you all this time, and through all this madness that hasn't changed"
"But earlier you said..."
"I know, and I stand by that. We have a lot we need to talk about, and we should probably take things slow, get to know each other again. Starting tonight with Gwen and those pizzas"
Ianto nodded, "I love you too, though"
Jack leant to peck him on the lips lightly, "Good. Because i've lost you once, Ianto Jones. I don't plan on doing it again"