A/N: Enjoy!
13. Bitches Be Crazy (part 2)
Rage.
I thought I knew what it was before today.
I thought I'd felt it before.
I was wrong.
In that instance when Lori uttered Rick's name, when she so ignorantly referred to Nugget as Jr., rage and I were properly introduced for the first time.
Every last one of my pores felt like they were on fire.
I welcomed the burn.
My rage awakened a primal need within me to break Lori in every way possible, by any means possible. I needed her to feel all of the chaos, the anger, the anguish, the sadness, the heartache, the strife, the insecurity she left behind in the wake of her disappearing act.
I had only one decision to make: Choke or punch.
My hands balled into tight fists.
Punch it was.
When I was close enough for my right cross to land, for that blow to give Lori the first taste of my rage, I cocked back my fist…
And let out a very surprised gasp when I was being lifted and carried away from Lori.
"Dickhead!" Daryl barked at Mike. "What don't you understand about grab Michonne?!"
"Daryl, let me go!" I shouted, trying to free myself from his arm tightly secured around my waist.
He grunted and kept walking farther away from Lori.
"Daryl!" I shouted.
I was beyond livid as I watched the fear on Lori's face turn into a smirk.
"Excuse me, Daryl… I don't believe I've yet had the pleasure of making your acquaintance," Mike said, sounding flustered.
Daryl stopped walking and turned to Mike.
I kept my eyes on Lori, still trying to break free from Daryl's hold.
"Who's this prick?" Daryl asked.
"Daryl Vernon Dixon, put me down!" I shouted.
"Some things never change. Still the same Daryl. Still the same Michonne," Lori sneered.
Daryl glared at Lori.
Because he was only wearing his swim shorts, I could feel how fast his heart was beating. I could feel how close he was to losing control.
Lori had a way of bringing out the absolute worst in all of us.
He walked us back over to her, making sure to angle his body so that he was the barrier between me and her. I squirmed more aggressively to try to free myself.
"You're right, Lori. Some shit don't change," he growled. "You're still the same Florida trash who was never good enough for Rick. Never will be."
She scowled at Daryl with ice in her eyes.
There was no love lost between the two, which made his refusal to let me go even more infuriating. I squirmed harder.
"Hey, guys!" I heard Maggie's bubbly voice shout. "What's goin' on?"
"You should leave. You're not welcome here," Daryl warned Lori.
"We'll see about that," she said, walking past us with a crooked little smile on her face.
She must have seen Rick.
"Daryl!" I pleaded.
His hold on me only tightened.
I kicked at Lori, but my feet only hit air.
She turned back and scowled at me. "Whatever you've been doin' with my family, you can stop now. Your services are no longer required."
I softly gasped.
I shouldn't have allowed them to, but her words shook me to my core. They so closely mirrored what I'd said to Rick when we argued a few weeks ago...
"But I can't help but feel like I'm acting as a seat warmer. That once she comes back... you'd have what you've been waiting for since she left… That you'd have your real family…"
Lori believed that Rick was hers. She believed that Nugget was hers. She believed that I no longer served a purpose in their lives.
I sluggishly squirmed around, defenseless against her words as they burrowed into me.
But a whisper of a thought floated through my mind, shielding me from Lori's verbal assault.
Mine.
That possessive little four-letter word was strong enough to pull me from my distress, and my rage came roaring back.
"She's still fuckin' crazy," Daryl muttered.
"Perhaps you should unhand Michonne, friend," Mike said to Daryl.
Daryl let out an agitated sigh. "And if I don't, friend?"
When Daryl turned to Mike, I whipped my head around to keep my eyes on Lori while continuing to try to free myself.
"I assure you I am more than proficient in Georgia laws and statutes," Mike prattled. "Unlawful restraint is a criminal offense. It is prosecutable."
"Mike, I'm fine," I growled, continuing to watch Lori.
"Hold up! This asshole is Panty Man?!" Daryl asked in shock, loosening his hold on me.
Before I could escape, he locked me into place again.
"Daryl!" I shouted in exasperation.
Maggie, who'd made her way over to us, looked curiously at me, Daryl and Mike but addressed Lori.
"Who're you?"
When Lori starting walking without acknowledging her, Maggie's eyes narrowed.
"Let's try this again," she said, catching up to Lori and blocking her path. "Who. Are. You?"
"Not. Your. Concern," Lori snapped.
"I don't know you, Daryl. You don't know me. Perhaps you'd be more comfortable having this conversation with an officer of the law," Mike said.
I rolled my eyes. What Mike seemed to have forgotten was that Rick—one of Daryl's best friends—was an officer of the law. Contacting any authority type would do nothing.
"I said I'm fine, Mike!" I shouted.
"You threatenin' me?" Daryl growled.
"Well that sign you passed by when you drove onto this property… the sign that says Hershel Greene's Farm? That's my daddy. This is his land," Maggie informed Lori. "It's private property, bitch! So you see? Who you are is my concern."
"Cuz I don't respond well to assholes threatenin' me," Daryl warned Mike. "It pisses me off."
"Daryl, calm down!" I could feel how fast his heartbeat was racing again.
He ignored me. "You tryin' to piss me off, motherfucker?"
"With all due respect to you and your daddy, I'm here to speak with Rick Grimes. You're not Rick," Lori hissed.
She attempted to walk past Maggie.
Maggie stepped to the side and continued blocking Lori's path.
"Move aside," Lori demanded.
Maggie ignored her. My eyes followed Maggie's to where Rick and Glenn were standing by the tree swings. I couldn't read the expression on Rick's face from so far away, but he was pacing. Glenn seemed to be keeping him calm enough.
I knew my words would keep him calmer, and I wanted to be by his side.
I really did.
But I wanted to punch Lori more.
"Your juvenile name-calling will neither distract nor deter me from insisting that you release Michonne," Mike told Daryl. "You are about to make this situation unnecessarily complicated for yourself."
"Mike, I said I'm fine!" I screamed.
Daryl grunted. "You better stop talkin', Panty Man."
Because of what was unfolding between Maggie and Lori, I couldn't give my full attention to what was unfolding between Daryl and Mike. If something flared-up between them, Mike was on his own.
"Doesn't seem like Rick is interested in talkin' to you," Maggie said to Lori, crossing her arms.
"I really don't care what anything seems like to you. Move."
Maggie and Lori were staring each down.
"I'm gonna ask you one last time," Maggie said slowly. "Who are you?"
And then Maggie took a step closer to Lori.
Shit!
Prior to meeting Glenn, Maggie admitted she had a bit of a bad girl reputation from her days of "brawlin', boozin' and bad boys." Her words. She wasn't ashamed of it. She owned up to the life choices she used to make.
But the day she met Glenn, whose kindness and goodness made her smile in a way she never had before, she was inspired to be better, to want more for herself. She gave up her wild ways.
She didn't miss the bad boys because she found a happiness and stability with Glenn that none of the bad boys were able to provide. She didn't miss drinking to excess because the high she sought from alcohol was something she was able to experience naturally with Glenn. But the fighting? She really did miss the fighting. She always enjoyed being the one to put someone in their place if they stepped out of line.
Glenn regularly coached her on how to effectively deal with conflict using her words rather than using her hands... or her elbows... or her legs... or her feet... or her forehead… or her teeth. And while she appreciated learning how to express herself assertively, she still felt that itch to put someone in their place nonverbally.
If not for the life growing inside of her, I would've supported Maggie scratching that itch with Lori, but putting baby Gleggie's safety at risk was not an option.
My mindset quickly shifted to defuse mode. Time was of the essence. If Lori introduced herself or if Maggie recognized Lori from the picture on Rick's mantle, I wasn't certain I'd be able to stop a brawl. If I could just get Daryl to let me go, I could get Maggie out of harm's way.
"Daryl," I whispered urgently, tapping his arm to get his attention.
"That's Lori Grimes. Rick's wife. The mother of his child," Mike chimed in.
Oh, no.
Maggie looked at me with her mouth hanging open.
Lori, taking advantage of Maggie's shock, bumped past her and continued marching to Rick.
"Fuck," I grumbled under my breath. "Mag, why don't you—"
"So you're not lettin' Michonne go," Maggie said to Daryl in a calm voice. A voice that was entirely too calm for her to have so much venom dancing in her eyes.
Before Daryl or I could respond, Maggie nodded her head as if she had come to an understanding.
"It's ok," she said with a chilling smile. "I got this bitch."
And then with a quickness I didn't expect, she caught up to Lori, grabbed her hair from behind and yanked. Hard.
Lori screamed out in pain as her body bent backwards.
"Damn," Daryl said in awe, dropping his arm from around my waist.
Since he was too distracted to realize he'd let me go, I rushed over to Maggie and Lori. "Maggie, don't do this!"
"Don't do what?" she asked in confusion, tightening her grip on Lori's hair. "Don't beat her ass?"
"Yeah, that. Don't do that."
I couldn't believe what I was requesting.
Maggie looked like she couldn't believe it either.
"Maggie!" Glenn yelled.
He was running toward us with Rick trailing behind him.
"I don't understand," Maggie slowly said to me. The confusion on her face grew thicker. "Isn't this Lori? The Lori?"
"Yes. That's her." I didn't try to mask the contempt in my voice.
"Then I don't understand. What's the problem, Michonne?"
Lori clawed at Maggie's wrist, trying to get up, but Maggie yanked her back down to the ground by her hair.
"Don't," she growled at Lori.
"Maggie," Glenn panted once he and Rick made it over to us. "W-what are you doing? Use… use your words."
"I love you, Glenn, but no," Maggie said.
"Lori," Rick uttered in disbelief.
I rolled my eyes. "You," I said, pointing at Rick. "Stay out of this! And you," I said, pointing at Maggie. "You need to stop."
"No!" Maggie shouted. "Didn't she abandon her family? Your family that's now my family?"
"She did." There was no point in lying about the ugly truth.
"And how many times did we talk about this? About what you would do if she came back?" Maggie asked.
I sighed. "So many times. Too many to count," I admitted.
"The moment is here, Michonne. The time is now!" she said a little overdramatically. "And I'm callin' dibs."
Lori whimpered.
"But, Maggie-" I began.
"No!" she shouted. "What she did as a wife, as a friend, as a… it's unforgivable! And she has a major attitude problem. And," she said, glaring at Lori. "I. Don't. Like. Her. I can't not beat her ass, Michonne."
Lori whimpered again.
"Maggie, you don't wanna do this. Violence won't solve anythang. Let her go," Rick instructed.
He'd used a deputy's tone of voice rather than a concerned husband's tone of voice, but the idea of him helping Lori in any capacity did not sit well with me.
"I told you to stay out of this!" I snapped.
"Rick," Lori whined.
"Shut up!" Maggie, Daryl and I shouted.
Maggie sighed impatiently. "So it's decided. I'm kickin' her ass."
"Maggie, stop! You can't do this," I said, panicking.
She narrowed her eyes at me in a way that probably should've had me sweating bullets, but I couldn't back down.
"This isn't about you, Maggie. This isn't about me. It's not about her! You have someone else to think about. So start thinking about that someone else right now!"
As Maggie processed what I said, the indignation on her face started to fade. She glanced down at her stomach and released Lori's hair.
When she looked at me, her green eyes were filled with remorse. "I would never do anythang to hurt..."
She covered her stomach with her hand.
"I know, Maggie. That's why you need to walk away," I said gently.
Looking crestfallen about what she'd almost done, Maggie stepped over Lori and walked to Glenn.
"What happened to using your words, babe?" Glenn asked with both concern and compassion.
"I-" was all she got out before she was being shoved from behind by Lori.
I watched in horror as Maggie stumbled forward. Thankfully, Glenn caught her before she fell. Without giving it a second thought, I rushed over to Lori and slammed her back down to the ground with a hand to her throat.
She landed roughly on her back and tail bone and cried out in pain.
"She's pregnant!" I shouted at her.
The instant Maggie's secret flew from my mouth, everyone became unnaturally quiet.
"Glenn?" a soft voice called out.
Hershel was making his way over on his crutches. He'd probably heard all the commotion and was coming to investigate. He'd probably hear me shout that Maggie was pregnant.
"Maggie?" Glenn asked, looking at her with a bewildered expression on his face.
"Michonne," Maggie whispered in fear, looking at me.
"You're..." Glenn said to Maggie.
When she wouldn't look at him, he looked at me.
"She's..." he said to me.
I ignored Maggie's terrified eyes and nodded at Glenn.
My nod, a confirmation of his new status in life, was like a jolt to his senses. He let Maggie go and backed away from her, from all of us, and walked to the house in a stupor.
Maggie's face crumbled. Uncertain of what to do, she looked at me, Rick and Daryl. When she looked at Hershel, her tears started to fall.
"Daddy," she sobbed, running to him and wrapping her arms around him.
Unable to hold her because of his crutches, he rested his head against hers as she cried on his shoulder. He whispered something in her ear, and she nodded, wiped her tears and hugged him again. He gave her a kiss on the cheek before she chased after Glenn.
Hershel watched Maggie jog away and wobbled on his crutches. Rick was by his side in a flash to make sure he didn't fall.
"I didn't know," Lori whined from the ground. "Rick, I didn't know! If I had, I never would've touched her. I'm a mother now, too!"
And my rage was back.
First, she shows up at Nugget's birthday party.
Then, she attacks Maggie.
And now, she utters the M word.
My fists balled.
Lori was sitting right there, and no one was holding me back this time.
Except someone was. Daryl pulled me back by my wrist.
"Anger makes you stupid, right?" he asked.
"She's not his mother," I growled through gritted teeth.
And then Lori buried her face in her hands.
And then she started crying.
Fucking Lori Grimes.
"Daryl!" Rick called out.
Daryl and I both looked his way. He gestured for Daryl to come over and then pointed at Hershel. Daryl nodded in understanding.
"Rick's comin' over here. You good?" he asked me.
My eyes drifted to Lori.
"Are you good?" Daryl asked again.
"You can let go," I murmured, keeping my eyes on Lori.
When he didn't let go of my wrist, my eyes shot to his. There was an understanding in them that I wasn't expecting to see.
"She's not his mother, 'Chonne," he said quietly, letting go of my wrist. "Rick knows that. We all do."
I wanted to be comforted by his words, but he knew as well as I did how Lori affected Rick. He may not have been the lovesick fool from a year ago, but he also hadn't had his 'I can do better by myself!' epiphany yet.
His vulnerability made Lori dangerous.
When Daryl took Rick's place by Hershel's side, Rick walked over. I felt his gaze on me but avoided it and anxiously clutched the M charm on my necklace. If Rick's eyes communicated anything other than animosity for Lori, I would without question allow anger to make me stupid.
"Rick," Lori muttered softly, sniffling.
I cringed.
The way she said his name, as if it somehow belonged to her after all this time, was like fingernails on chalkboard. But it got Rick's attention. I felt his gaze shift from me.
I steeled myself and watched their reunion.
Lori was sitting up on her knees now, and though there was an impressive amount of sniffling coming from her, I had yet to see any tears actually fall.
Rick stood in front of her, keeping his distance.
And then he was squinting.
Tilt your head, Rick. Tilt your head, Rick. Tilt your head, Rick.
Instead, he ran his hand down his face and looked at Lori with a blank expression.
A blank expression was too far removed from anger, as far as I was concerned. A blank expression meant the door to forgiveness and acceptance was wide open.
Lori held out her hand for Rick to help her up.
I turned away from them, closing my eyes. This all seemed so surreal, yet so very, very predictable.
I knew where things were headed.
I felt myself start to shake.
Breathe, Michonne.
Breathe.
When I was calm enough to do so, I opened my eyes.
Mike, who had fallen off my radar once things escalated between Maggie and Lori, fell into my line of sight.
The uneasy calm I'd just found was shattered, and my rage started churning again. But I was also baffled by the troubled look on Mike's face as he watched Rick and Lori. I expected to see nothing less than unabashed glee as he took them in.
Them. Rick and Lori.
I rubbed the bridge of my nose and squeezed my eyes shut at the thought… at the reality of them.
"Are you ok?" I heard Rick ask.
Un-fucking-believable!
When we reminisced about Nugget's first birthday in the days or months or years to come, our happy memories would forever be eclipsed by the chaos that Lori brought with her. Yet Rick was asking her about her well-being.
After everything, she still had him wrapped around her finger.
After everything, he still wanted to be wrapped around that finger.
My rage petered out.
Weariness took its place.
My desire to break Lori was in direct conflict with Rick's unshakeable commitment to her.
I would never support their reconciliation.
I had only one choice now. I had to accept that my place in this Rick and Lori saga had come to an end.
I was done fighting with Rick about her.
I was done picking up his broken pieces because of her.
I was just done.
My only concern was Nugget. Lori would undoubtedly try to prevent me from seeing him, but I-
"Hey," Rick said, gently grabbing hold of one of my elbows. "Michonne, are you ok?"
I flinched from his touch, completely surprised by it.
"Huh?" was all I could manage to say as I turned to face him.
"Are you ok?"
I looked at Lori.
She was still sitting in the dirt.
Huh?
I pulled my shades off and looked into Rick's eyes. When I saw that his concern was for me and my well-being, I threw my arms around his neck and hugged him tight.
"Cuz I'm not doin' ok right now," he whispered.
I nodded and whispered, "I know, Rick."
"How?" he asked, wrapping his arms around me.
"Because I'm not doing ok either," I whispered, hugging him tighter.
I caught Lori staring at us as she got up from the ground unassisted. She patted the dirt off her jeans with her lips pinched together in a frown.
I was petty enough to smile at her.
"Daddy!" Beth shouted, running to Hershel. "Maggie's cryin' and Glenn's upset. What happened?"
I pulled away from Rick. There was a storm of emotions brewing in his eyes, so I told him what he needed to hear…
"You got this."
I hoped that was true. There was still so much doubt in my mind.
Rick took a deep breath and hooked his pinky finger around mine.
"Pregnant!" Beth squealed in delight.
I gave Rick's pinky a quick squeeze and put my shades back on. I tried to keep my face neutral, but Rick was too good at reading me.
"What is it?" he whispered.
I shrugged as if I didn't know what he was talking about, but I just didn't want to admit the truth. And truthfully, I was about to take great pleasure in whatever unpleasant interaction Beth was about to have with Lori.
Beth wasn't as easily triggered as Maggie was when it came to fighting, but she was fiercely protective of her older sister. There was no way Beth was walking away from Lori without leaving a mark.
"What!" Beth screeched. "Who?"
I watched Hershel nod his head in Lori's direction.
Beth took a few steps toward her.
"You pushed down my sister?" she asked, her entire face scrunched in anger. "My pregnant sister?"
Lori started to back away slowly. She should've started running. Beth tackled her to the ground before she was able to take a full step back.
I tried to contain my joy, but I think I may have snorted.
"Really, Michonne?" Rick deadpanned.
Ever the sheriff's deputy, he sprang into action to pull Beth off Lori. It took him a minute, but he eventually carried her away as she screamed out obscenities and threats.
The Greenes really, truly were something else.
"Told you! You aren't welcome here!" Daryl shouted to Lori.
I was enjoying the view of Lori curled into a fetal position when I felt Mike's hand on my elbow. I jerked away from his touch and whipped around to face him.
"Michonne," he said, an uncharacteristic hint of nervousness in voice. "It was not my intention-"
I held up my hand to silence him.
"When you were on the phone last night at Blue Fish, on our date night, you were on the phone with her?"
The truth looked like it pained him, but I waited for him to answer.
"Yes, Michonne."
"This morning when you left, it was to get her?"
"Yes," he answered.
"When you were on your business trip, you were in Florida to find her?"
"Yes. However, my intentions-"
The sound of my palm cracking against his cheek rang out. I gave him a hard stare before walking over to Daryl and Hershel.
"And on that note, I think it's best that you two get off my property," Hershel said in a loud, cold voice. "Immediately."
"I have been assaulted!" Lori screamed, sitting up.
"If I have to repeat myself, I will consider you two to be trespassers," Hershel continued, ignoring her, "and I will let my shotgun take over this conversation. Do we understand each other?"
"We understand," Mike mumbled, rubbing his jaw.
Being oh so familiar with those Georgia laws and statutes, Mike knew the rights that were granted to landowners when it came to removing trespassers from their land. He helped Lori up and steered her towards their parked cars despite her loud protests.
"Tata, motherfuckers!" Daryl shouted.
I rolled my eyes. "Don't be extra, Daryl."
"Says the woman who just slapped the hell out of Panty Man," he retorted, scoffing.
"That wasn't extra. That was deserved," I said very seriously.
"Or you coulda just told him to leave and lose your number," he argued. "See? Sometimes extra is necessary."
"Alright, you two. No one was being extra. You both were being just enough," Hershel said diplomatically.
I doubted he knew what extra even meant.
"Thank you, Hershel," Daryl said, smirking at me.
"Michonne, you need some ice on that hand," Hershel advised. "Go on to the house and get some. And when you see Annette, would you ask her to bring around the golf cart and my shotgun?"
Daryl and I stared at him.
"Just making sure they leave without incident," he said with a shrug.
"You watch it, old man... I'm not helping you bury any bodies today," I joked.
He winked at me and gave me a smile that made me wonder if I actually would have to help him bury bodies today. Then he cleared his throat and looked at me a little bashfully.
"A grandfather?" he asked.
"A grandfather," I told him.
"A grandfather," he said proudly with a big smile.
I fixed a glare on Daryl. "Hey, Hershel? Will you be ok standing on your own for just a minute?"
"Yes, I think I will," he replied, enjoying his grandfatherly thoughts.
Daryl grunted when I grabbed him by his wrist and pulled him to the side. "Don't look at me like that," he mumbled when I stood in front of him, staring at him.
"Like what, Daryl?" I asked innocently, dropping his wrist.
"Like-"
I shoved him in the chest.
"Like you're about to do that," he said, stumbling backwards.
"Don't you ever hold me back from her again!"
He rolled his eyes. "You need to take that up with Rick. He told me to not to let you go after you took off like a bat outta hell to get Lori."
I gave him the middle finger. It was a short-lived middle finger because it was on the hand I used to slap Mike with and that hand was throbbing.
"I will never, ever forgive you, Daryl!"
He looked completely unbothered by what I said. "Three king-sized Big Kats and a liter of Dr Pepper say you will forgive me."
"Ten king-sized Big Kats, a bag of minis and a case of Dr Pepper by the end of the day," I demanded.
He rolled his eyes again. "Fine, Michonne."
We both glanced at Hershel to make sure he didn't need help standing. He looked steady.
"I was headed down the Slip 'N Slide when I saw 'em," Daryl said to me. "Took a second for me to realize it was Lori. It never crossed my mind that the asshole with her was Panty Man. I just thought he was some asshole. I got to you and Rick as fast as I could."
"She's back, D," I murmured.
"That doesn't mean shit."
"But if Rick-"
"He won't," Daryl said. "He didn't."
"He didn't today, but Lori has a way of-"
"Michonne," he interrupted, looking at my necklace. "He won't."
I sighed again as he put his arm around my shoulder, and we walked to Hershel.
"You got Rick?" he asked.
"Yeah, I got him."
"Yeah, I'm sure you do," he retorted, smirking. "What exactly were you two talkin' about before I ran over to you?"
"Batman," I deadpanned.
"Uh huh."
"Anyways, where's your girlfriend?" I asked, changing the subject.
I grinned when I noticed how his cheeks turned the faintest shade of pink.
"Figured Lori was gonna be trouble, so I asked her to leave."
Fucking Lori Grimes.
"Calm down. You'll meet her," he grumbled before I could pout about how I didn't get the chance to meet her.
"What do you think?" Hershel asked, grabbing onto Daryl's arm for support once Daryl was close enough. "Pop Pop? Gramps? Grampy?"
"I think you have a golf cart and a shotgun headed your way, Pop Pop," I said as I took off to the house.
A/N: Thank you for reading! Please take the time to leave a review. It's appreciated!