Lucius watched their conversation from the bedroom window. Whatever resolution it came to obviously left Narcissa upset and trying to hide it, while Draco, hugging her tightly, had a look of relief on his face that made Lucius realize exactly how drawn he had looked for the past three years.
The doors opened and their voices echoed around the entryway, and then one set of footsteps approached the bedroom. Draco knocked at the open door and came in to find Lucius still leaning on the window frame, unable to bolt away and disguise his purpose.
"I have to talk to you," Draco said.
"That sounds like a good idea. Let me get my cane and we can go down to my study."
"We can stay here." Draco came forward with an arm out. "Just sit in the armchair. I'll sit on her vanity stool."
Lucius accepted the help, and sat slumped much lower in the soft chair than he would have wished. The best show of himself could now only be made, really, when he was standing still with the support of his wife at his side.
"Mum said you talked about Hogwarts already. I'm not going back."
"That's fine. You did have most of the school year, whether or not anyone else thinks it was done correctly."
"I know. And I'll take the N.E.W.T.s when they're offered. But in the meantime I'm not going to stay here. I'm going to Marrakesh to live with Toby Neville and his family, and I'll have a job with him."
Lucius had been expecting something like this; although his wife was much closer to Draco, it had given her illusions of his desires, and also a somewhat desperate need to keep him close. He admired her for it, knowing that was all borne out of how she had spent years fighting every moment of the day to keep him safe, but it was obvious that their son was now disconnected from everything that his parents had created for him.
"That seems like a responsible plan, as long as you're sure they're really ok with having a houseguest."
"There may have been some mention of appreciating an occasional babysitter."
"Ah, that's a classic one."
"If it's too much, I can leave and live alone, or come back. I'll have the natural break when I come back for exams anyway, if it seems like it isn't working out. But I am going."
"You're an adult. I think you're supposed to sow your wild oats now, or whatever it is they say."
The corner of Draco's lips twitched. "Is that what you did?"
"I don't know. I was very consumed in waiting for your mother. I don't think it's sowing your wild oats to buy and furnish a house in anticipation of your wedding day. But that is when I – I made all my choices." Lucius, knowing he was not meant to use the words the Dark Lord, usually preferred to stumble over mentions of him rather than call him by his name or use some mouthful of a euphemism. "It wasn't a usual youthful exploration of the world. It was too much commitment. I thought I was an adult and ready for all of it, and of course I wasn't."
"How old were you when you took the Mark?"
"Just about your age now. Older than you were, unfortunately. I hope you know that I desperately wish it hadn't happened to you. I failed entirely in that regard, and I set up the woman I love to watch it all happen with no support."
"At least we had Professor Snape. Although I didn't appreciate him."
"No one appreciated him, other than your mother, and apparently Dumbledore. He lived a very hard life."
"I can't believe that kept him going all those years, just watching over Potter. Knowing it would probably get him killed someday."
"I can't explain it, Draco, but he really loved that woman. It drove me crazy when we were younger. And he was watching you too, and he did get companionship from us. I can only hope that did bring him happiness sometimes."
Narcissa came to the open door and was relieved to find the two in a conversation that seemed to have a peaceful bent to it. Lucius met her gaze and offered a tired smile, and Draco turned to her.
"I think it's time for tea," she told them. "And we can talk about what you'll need to pack."
Andromeda did not reply to Narcissa's letter of peace in a timely manner. The Manor was completely put to rights and late summer wildflowers were blooming in the lanes beyond the gates before an owl arrived with a short invitation to Narcissa only.
Teddy will be napping, she warned, so don't knock.
It was the same little house Lucius had spent a late night protecting so long ago, in a row with half a dozen Muggle cottages of the same design. The garden overflowed its bounds, and Narcissa wondered if Muggles walking past ever noticed the way the roof was almost bulging with what she could immediately detect as an expansion charm.
She had meant to walk in timidly, to follow where she was led and to wait for her sister to start any conversation, for her consent to do anything at all. But as soon as she stepped through the gate, the front door opened, and Narcissa could not stop herself from flying forward and into arms that were, remarkably, open to her.
The first thing they did was silently admire Teddy in his crib. The windowsill of his tiny nursery was lined with photographs, several of his parents both with and without the baby in their arms, and of his grandfather, and one of him and Harry Potter that had to be brand new, judging by how big Teddy was shown to be. Narcissa was really shocked by his size; although she had known when he was born, it was still awful to see him as little more than a newborn and know he was an orphan. Andromeda shut the door quietly behind them and led Narcissa back downstairs, past her own sparse and tranquil bedroom and past a room that was a riot of neon colors with a sort of snow drift of eccentric clothing and school issued, half-used potions kits, and more than one splintered broomstick, rimming the walls.
"She hadn't lived here for years," Andromeda said softly as Narcissa paused to look. "And I was always hounding her to come back and clean it out. Then she came before he was born, and just shoved it all to the edges. Someday he'll need the bigger room, but for now…"
There were far too many things to say. They sat down in the kitchen for tea and began to stumble over it, Andromeda first asking after their parents, who Narcissa could only report were the same.
"They haven't noticed the War is over, except that Bellatrix is gone, as if she was ever a good daughter to them. Mother won't last much longer without her, I don't think. I know that sounds hard-hearted."
"Do you think I care, with the way I was treated?"
"I know."
"I heard that Lucius was hurt." This was not an expression of sympathy, beyond opening the door for Narcissa to share.
"He should have died. I thought Draco and I had just watched him die. It's aged him greatly."
"I feel like I'm 75."
"Me too."
Andromeda got up to heat more water, leaving Narcissa to stare at a man's cloak still hanging on a hook by the back door. For the Malfoys, the end of the War seemed like the end of everything, of their purpose and reputation. Andromeda was left to start over entirely with a baby, all alone.
"I want to give you money, Andy," Narcissa said when the teapot was refilled. There was no reason to try to temper the words or wait to ask; the two were not likely to start spending cozy afternoons together with regularity. There was no relationship to protect from awkwardness. "I know it's forward, and maybe you have savings, maybe there are things I don't know about. But I know you'll never get it from Mother and Father, and I know Remus and Nymphadora were working for love of a cause, not to make money. Let us do something."
"I have a pension from Ted, and there's a Victim's Fund for both of us. Harry wants to take care of Teddy."
"Harry will have his own family someday, and I hope you are going to live a long life. All I want is to give what should have been your inheritance. It's ridiculous of them to leave it all to me when I'm already – when Lucius and I are so lucky."
"I've been reading about his sentencing in the paper. Don't you think you're going to need it?"
"No. You were engaged to him once, Andy. You saw how it is."
"Merlin. Don't remind me of that. What are you going to do if I say no?"
"I don't know. Give it away. That's what we mean to do anyway, to try to do some good."
"Yes, that is always how you seem to come through these things. Get that Malfoy name on another building."
"It's not going to be like that. They're taking down that ridiculous statue at the Ministry tomorrow, and when it's gone and they've had time to choose something else, it'll be a memorial. That was all Lucius's idea, and it won't have a name on it. No one is to know, although I suppose I've just told you."
"See? You can't resist telling, and neither can he, I'm sure."
"We have to do something, Andromeda. Do you have a better suggestion?"
Her sister paused and twisted her lips as she turned her teaspoon over and over between slender fingertips. She did look so like Bellatrix, especially as they had both aged. She had probably seen pictures in the newspaper and hated it, but she would never have the firsthand experience Narcissa did. A walking ghost of her despised sister, softened everywhere as if Bellatrix had learned a lesson and been transformed. As a girl, the marked difference between Narcissa's appearance and theirs had always made her feel outside of something, although obviously it had never done any good for the relationship between the other two.
"If you aren't careful, Mother and Father will find out about this whole plot and disinherit you too."
"I'll be plenty careful, Andy. There's really no kind of conversation with them anymore, anyway. We just sit and listen to diatribes about how things used to be."
"Put what you like in an account in his name, then. Don't think about me."
"I think of you all the time, and I intend to do something about it at least on your birthday, and at Christmas."
Andromeda went quiet again, looking out the window and watching as the mail carrier walked down the street, passing their house as if it wasn't even there. "It can't be the way it was, Cissy. You know that Bellatrix was the one…who…"
"I know, Andromeda, but you can hardly blame that on me for the rest of my life."
"I know it's not logical, but can you blame me? What if Draco had been killed by someone in the Order?"
"It would have ripped me to pieces, and I can praise you now because if it had happened to me, I would have died too. You are stronger than me in many ways. But please, Andy, I can blame you at least a little bit, can't I? You did leave knowing that you would have be replaced in marriage by someone else."
Andromeda stiffened. "I offered you an escape. I don't think that it's caused you any great heartache to have "had" to marry Lucius, has it? And look, your family is alive, you have been loved by our parents all these years, your fortune is barely diminished. I don't doubt that there were hardships, but please. You were hardly used ill."
"I think you're deflecting from the fact that I was used, ill or otherwise, but we should stop. You were happy to see me. I would trade all those years with Mother and Father and Bellatrix for having known you."
"Narcissa. Listen to yourself. What was stopping you? There were 14 years without any war in them. I don't even think Lucius would have cared, and you would never have had to tell our parents. This world you're trying to craft for a cozy future doesn't exist. I am happy to stay in touch now, but look at my life and yours. Could I invite you to Teddy's birthday party with all the people who will be there?" At that moment the little boy started to cry, and Andromeda stood up, brushing crumbs off her corduroy skirt. "You can come hold him now that he's awake, if you like."
"No, I…I should go. Thank you for tea, and I'll write a letter about…arrangements."
"Goodbye, Cissy."
"Goodbye, Andy."
I'm no one to talk if you read some of my other fic but these past few chapters have really made me aware of the age gap between Lupin and Tonks like he was literally in her parents' generation at school! Just kind of a fascinating choice to throw in there in these books where the relationships are never anything that unexpected
I want to prepare your minds for the fact that I'm going to portray Draco and Astoria's relationship beginnings differently than they are said to have happened in "canon", which is basically all just from a blog post written by JKR and not anything out of an actual book. If I can't have just a little fun with my fic what's the point of living am I right. (and I actually think my version will make the trio seemingly not knowing Draco's wife during the epilogue make SENSE. Ok I've said too much)
Also, if you're wondering how long this will go on, I would be surprised if there are four more chapters left. I don't know exactly when it will end but certainly not going all the way to Lucius and Narcissa's deaths or anything like that lol
