Authors note:

Thank you so much for bearing with me as I slowly try to finish this story. Shout out to Tokentroll, thank you for your kind words. I have to admit you inspired me to try and find my creative side again to finish this story. I'm immersed in science each and every day so I had to spend a few weeks trying to squeeze some fanfiction reading into my routine to help me get back in to it.

Anyway, I hope you like this chapter, I promise I have already started working on what is probably going to be the last chapter. I'm just need to figure out how I want it to end. 28 year old me (when I started writing this story) had waaay different ideas to 46 year old me ;-).

Chapter 19: Redemption

Int: Hospital ward, Los Angeles General Hospital

Buffy woke with a start, the room was bright and blinding; she squinted at the fluorescent lights in the ceiling, momentarily confused.

"She's awake!"

Buffy slowly became more aware of her surroundings, the regular drip of the fluid running into the IV line connected to the cannula in her hand, delivering life saving fluids. She tried to sit up but a wave of nausea overcame her and she slumped back against the pillow. It was surprisingly comfortable.

"Take it easy." It was Giles, "You lost quite a lot of blood from that wound, you need to give your slayer healing a bit longer."

"How long?" Buffy's voice was croaky.

"36 hours, not too long. You needed the rest."

Buffy suddenly sat bolt upright again, regretting it instantly but not caring, "Faith!"

Giles moved to calm his slayer, "Critical, but alive."

"I need to see her." Buffy was desperate.

"Soon – " Giles interjected.

"The way we left things, I stabbed her, the abyss." Buffy was frantic.

"Buffy, you're not making any sense, Spike shot Faith, you and Kennedy saved her! She wasn't stabbed, and certainly not by you." He stared at the blonde, concerned.

"No, but – " Buffy paused and frowned, trying hard to recall. It finally dawned on her it had been a slayer dream. She relaxed a little, "We have unfinished business, I need to see her." Buffy pleaded.

"Buffy, she's in a coma." Giles said softly.

The blonde paused briefly, taking in that devasting news, "I don't care," she said sadly, "we can communicate in Slayer dreams." She looked up at Giles pleading.

He finally conceded, he knew better than to try to prevent Buffy from doing something when she had her stubborn pouty face on. He managed to get one of the attending nurses to help him out and assist Buffy into a wheelchair.

"She's in the ICU, Buffy, so you probably won't be able to stay long." He started pushing her wheelchair.

"Where is the gang?" Buffy was scared to see the dark slayer, to see what condition she was in, small talk helped distract her.

"They're at a motel having a much needed and deserved rest. We've been taking turns to spend time with you and Faith and the other injured."

Buffy nodded, the glass doors of the ICU loomed and she was suddenly terrified of what lay beyond those doors. Faith was so badly hurt, she didn't know what to expect.

At least she's alive. Buffy could feel the tingle of their connection, it was weak but there.

Int: ICU, Los Angeles General Hospital

"I don't know how she survived those wounds." The voice was muffled, it seemed far away.

"She's not out of the woods yet."

Faith was aware of voices around her, they seemed distant, muffled, but she could feel hands gently touching her, checking the multitude of tubes poking out of her broken body.

"Did you see the news? What happened to Sunnydale?"

"Earthquake?"

If only you knew the truth. Faith was acutely aware of pain, intense pain, lots of it, everywhere. She winced gently, tried to open her eyes but they were heavier than lead.

"Doctor, she stirred!"

Faith sensed more movement around her.

"Faith." The voice was gentle, "Faith, can you hear me?"

The dark slayer frowned, she tried to nod affirmative, to open her eyes but was shocked at how impossible this task was.

"Maybe it was nothing."

"No, she definitely moved." The owner of the voice gently touched Faith's arm.

Faith summoned all of her strength, enough to raise her right index finger ever so slightly.

"There!" the voice was excited, "She moved her finger."

"Her heart rate is increasing, so is her blood pressure." Faith felt a cool sensation on her chest as the doctor used a stethoscope to listen to her heart and lungs.

Her eyes flickered open briefly but the bright lights were too much and her eyelids still felt leaden.

"Faith, can you open your eyes for me?" the voice was gentle, reassuring.

Faith swallowed, her throat dry, she tried to open her mouth to speak but discovered she was unable to because of the tube in her airway. Her eyes started to flicker open, she tried to raise her arm to remove the tube but everything was heavy like lead. She started to panic a little, her heart rate and blood pressure started to elevate more.

"She's panicking, doctor."

"Faith, Faith, it's ok, you're in the hospital." the slayer felt gentle hands on her shoulder. Her eyes finally fluttered open and she could make out a blurry figure standing over her.

"Welcome back."

Faith's vision cleared and she could see the kind face of the person who was trying to reassure her.

"I'm Kara, one of the nurses caring for you."

Faith tried to reach for the tube in her mouth again.

"That's helping you breathe; your lung was badly damaged by the bullet." Kara gently stopped the slayer from ripping the tube out of her mouth and turned to the doctor, "Do you think it's time to remove the ET tube?" she enquired.

Faith saw another figure come into view, the owner of the stethoscope. She looked tired, concern for her patient etched on her face.

"Faith, I'm Dr Bristow, I'm going to see if you can breathe unassisted, if you can I'll remove the tube from your trachea. It will feel a bit weird and maybe uncomfortable, but you'll be able to speak."

Faith nodded slightly as the doctor gently started to unscrew the ventilator connection, "I'm going to disconnect this first," She explained, "If you are unable to breathe I will reconnect it so don't worry. It will be hard at first, you need to remind your muscles to move to take a breath."

Faith blinked slowly and nodded her head ever so slightly.

The doctor unconnected the ventilator and put a hand on Faith's shoulder to comfort her. With the ventilator connection lost the dark slayer started to panic a little when she couldn't breathe right away, there was an intense heaviness on her chest as if something was crushing her, she looked at the doctor desperately.

"It's ok, Faith, just try to take a deep breathe." The doctor's voice was soothing, "You just need to remind your muscles what to do."

Faith closed her eyes and concentrated as hard as she could on taking a breath, beads of sweat broke out on her forehead from the exertion.

"Maybe she isn't ready." The nurse said, concerned for her patient.

"Give her a bit longer, her recovery so far has been miraculous," The doctor reassured the nurse and then turned to her patient, "You're ready." She said with conviction, smiling at her patient.

Faith frowned as she concentrated on what should be second nature. Everything was so heavy, so hard. Finally she felt her muscles and lungs stop spasming and she was able to take a breath, the pain in her chest was excruciating and she winced before starting to cough against the endotracheal tube.

Dr Bristow quickly deflated the cuff and removed the tube and between her and Kara they adjusted the bed and assisted Faith into a more upright position to help with her breathing. Kara placed an oxygen mask over the slayer's face, "Breathe deeply, this will help." She said gently.

Faith nodded her appreciation as she leant back into the inclined bed. Her brow was furrowed, her entire body was wracked with pain and she could feel the darkness starting to close in again as exhaustion overcame her.

"Faith!" the brunette was suddenly very aware of the strength of her slayer connection with Buffy. She turned toward the voice and saw the blonde in a wheelchair being pushed towards her by Giles.

"B…" it was barely audible, she smiled at the blonde before her eyes fluttered closed again, the exertion too much for her still healing body.

"Oh god, Faith!" Buffy stood up and crossed the remaining distance to be at the dark Slayer's side.

"It's ok, she just passed out." Dr Bristow reassured the blonde, "She is in a lot of pain and just endured having the breathing tube removed which took a lot of energy."

Buffy's shoulder's sagged with relief and she started to feel a bit wobbly, luckily Giles had reached her with the wheelchair so she was able to fall back into the seat.

"How is she, Dr." Giles gazed at the brunette, concern in his expression.

"She is doing remarkably well, I've actually never seen someone with such severe injuries make such rapid progress." Dr Bristow was shaking her head, astonished.

Buffy was holding Faith's hand, careful not to disrupt the IV line. She took in all the machinery around Faith's bed, all monitoring vital signs or providing lifesaving medication.

"God she's going to hate all of this." Buffy said softly, "She hates hospitals," she clarified for Dr Bristow, "She was in a coma for 8 months…" Buffy trailed off, it wasn't important, what was important was the brunette lying in the bed in front of her.

"I'd like to stay with her." Buffy looked up at the doctor, "Please," She pleaded, "I need to stay with her."

The doctor smiled and nodded affirmatively before giving Kara instructions to give Faith more pain killers and then she headed away to keep checking on her other patients.

Buffy climbed on to the bed next to Faith, careful not to disrupt all the lines and tubes. She pulled the unconscious slayer close and gentle rested her head on Faith's uninjured shoulder. The tingle of their slayer connection was comforting, relaxing, healing. The blonder slayer started to doze off.

Giles cleared his throat softly and awkwardly removed his glasses to start cleaning, "Well, um, I'll, ahem, I'll go and check on the other slayers."

Buffy yawned and nodded slightly before falling into a deep sleep next to her love.

Slayer Dream

Buffy frowned as she took in her surroundings. She was standing on the roof of the apartment the Mayor had bought for Faith. Memories of that fateful night came flooding back to her, her chest tightened and she struggled to take a breath as despair and regret filled her. Tears welled in her eyes as she saw the scattered glass from the window that had shattered.

There was a chill in the air, unfinished business was lingering.

Buffy rubbed her bare arms with her hands, the hairs standing up, but not only because of the temperature, but because of what had transpired between herself and the dark slayer. She approached the edge of the roof, there was a pool of blood dripping down the wall, the same wall where Faith had stood, clutching desperately at the stab wound in her abdomen, before she fell.

Willow's voice rang in her head, "Buffy, if Angel drains Faith's blood it'll kill her."

"Not if she's already dead."

Buffy felt her chest tighten, like something was squeezing her heart. She struggled to draw breathe.

"I just don't want to lose you."

"I won't get hurt!"

"That's not what I meant."

The knife she had used to stab the brunette was sitting on the ledge. The blade coated in Faith's blood. She choked back tears as she relived that tragic night.

She heard footsteps behind her and spun around to face the unknown, fists raised.

"B."

The dark slayer was standing in front of Buffy, not the younger, angrier, wilder Faith, the slayer that Buffy had stabbed, this was the older, wiser, mature Faith, the slayer that Buffy loved.

She slowly dropped her hands but paused when she saw the knife clutched in her right hand. Faiths blood still on her hands.

"What's the matter? All that killing and you're afraid to die?"

"That's mine!"

"You're about to get it back."

"B." Faith took a step towards the blonde; she could sense the panic and regret coming from the older Slayer.

Buffy looked up at the brunette as she approached, tears streaming down her face.

"You did it! You killed me."

Buffy dropped the knife, the metallic chink on the floor loud in the tense silence, "This knife always comes between us."

"Buffy." Faith said the blonde slayers name so quietly as she took another step forward and reached out to take her hand.

Buffy pulled her hand back out of the dark Slayers grasp, "I always end up hurting you, Faith." She cried, taking a step backwards.

The sight of the distraught blonde broke the brunette's heart, she advanced again and put her hands on the older slayers shoulders, ignoring her protests.

"Please, Faith, how can you forgive me for this? How?" Buffy threw her blood soaked hands up in despair and crumpled to her knees, the pain and emotion too overwhelming.

Faith knelt in front of the woman she loved, "B, you have to let it go, you can't keep holding on to this night, you have to learn to forgive yourself."

"I can't…" Buffy sobbed, holding her face in her hands, her body wracked with sobs.

Faith brushed a rogue strand of hair behind the blonde's ear, "You can, you already are coming to terms with that night." The dark slayer gestured at the knife lying on the ground next to them, "Usually by now that thing is embedded in my abdomen." She smiled as she saw the realisation hit Buffy.

"I forgave you long ago, B, you helped me find redemption and forgive myself, now it's your turn. You need to let go of the guilt you feel for trying to take a human life."

Faith saw that her words were slowly starting to have an impact, she pulled Buffy into a fierce hug and held her tight. The blonde protested only weakly before relaxing in her love's arms. They could both feel the tension between them finally start to disappear.