It was lunch time and even though the official start of fall had been a few weeks ago, it was still warm enough in Hope Valley for the kids to eat their lunch outside. Elizabeth, however, stayed inside the schoolhouse and tried to get some grading done as she ate the sandwich and apple she had brought from home. Unfortunately, she wasn't very successful. Something, or rather a certain someone, was occupying her mind instead.
"This is pointless," Elizabeth finally muttered, as she set down her pen. She had to go talk to Nathan. Now. There was no way she would get any work done otherwise. Elizabeth packed her unfinished lunch back into her lunch pail and then headed outside to let Allie and the other kids know where she was going and that she would be back by the time lunch was over.
Elizabeth wanted nothing more than to run through town and straight into the Mountie office, but that would surely look suspicious, so she settled for a brisk pace instead. Elizabeth had climbed the stairs and was about to push open the wooden door when she heard voices coming from inside.
Nathan stared at the piece of paper on the desk in front of him, but for the life of him, he couldn't seem to comprehend it.
"So, what do you think?" Nathan glanced up sharply at Bill, who was staring at him.
"Um, well." Nathan leaned back in his chair and ran a hand through his hair. "I-I think it makes sense," Nathan finally sputtered out.
"Really?" Bill raised his eyebrows.
"Yeah," Nathan replied, gesturing vaguely with his hand. "Don't you?"
"Oh well, sure. I totally agree that every Mountie dog should have to travel to Union City once a month for a check-up."
"Yeah, exactly." It took a moment for Bill's words to sink it. "Wait, what did you say?!" Nathan burst out.
Bill couldn't help but smirk as Nathan sat straight up in his chair and stared at Bill.
"Once a month?!" Nathan repeated, incredulous. "But that's-"
"Ridiculous?" Bill finished for him. "You clearly didn't read the paper, pal," Bill said to the younger Mountie.
"What do you mean?" Nathan protested, scowling now. "I read the paper."
"Oh sure. Of course you did," Bill replied, obviously being sarcastic as he smirked again. "If by reading you mean that you stared at the words and hoped that they would just magically transmit themselves to your brain, then yeah. I guess you did read the paper."
"Fine. I didn't read it," Nathan said, his words a harsh admission. Nathan scowled as he looked down at the paper and then back up at Bill. "I had no idea what you were talking about. There. Are you happy?" Nathan threw up his hands in frustration and sent a fiery look Bill's way.
"No, I'm not happy," Bill replied, much to Nathan's chagrin. "Is there something on your mind? Did something happen between you and Elizabeth?" At the question, the fire in Nathan's eyes died and he slumped back against the chair, glancing away.
"What makes you say that?" Nathan muttered, almost too quietly for Bill to hear, but the judge winced at the heavy sarcasm filling Nathan's words.
"Nathan," Bill said gently, knowing from experience that Nathan would probably be better off if he just got it off his chest. "What happened?" Finally, Nathan glanced up at Bill.
"We didn't have an argument or anything like that," Nathan finally said. "It's just… something happened last night and I can't seem to let it go." When he didn't elaborate further, Bill took a seat in the chair on the other side of the desk and leaned forward a little.
"What happened?" Bill asked again, after a minute. Nathan ran a hand through his dark hair as he proceeded to tell Bill about the dream Elizabeth had the night before.
"And now I just can't help but feel selfish," Nathan admitted, when he was done. His hair was all over the place now and his face looked stricken.
"How so?" Bill asked, narrowing his eyes a bit.
"Every time I go away or run into active danger, it worries Elizabeth. And Allie and Jack too," Nathan explained. "When I put myself in danger, I am hurting them and causing them pain. How can I do that, Bill?" Nathan asked, his eyes full of anguish. "How can I ask them to put up with that day after day and year after year? How can I ask the three people I love most to live like that? It's not fair." Nathan glanced away as he felt his eyes starting to sting. "I just don't know if I can do it anymore."
"So you're thinking about quitting the Mounties." Bill didn't say it like a question. He already knew that's what was running through Nathan's head. In response, Nathan just nodded, but he couldn't manage a longer reply. "Have you talked to Elizabeth about it?" Bill asked then, looking across the desk at his friend. Nathan shook his head.
"She's just going to say that nothing has ever happened before and that I shouldn't quit," Nathan said, running a hand through his already unruly hair.
"But you haven't asked her yet," Bill pointed out. "So how do you know what she's going to say?"
"Because that's what she's said every other time we've talked about it," Nathan replied.
"But that's not this time," Bill countered. Nathan didn't have an answer for that, so he just averted his eyes instead. "Maybe you should talk to her before you determine what you already think she is going to say." Nathan turned to study Bill for a second before he slowly nodded his head, though somewhat reluctantly.
It felt as if the weight of the world was pressing down on Nathan's shoulders. He wasn't looking forward to it, but Nathan knew what had to be done. Bill was right. He had to talk to Elizabeth. He had to tell her what he was going to do. Nathan Grant was quitting the Mounties.
