Happy May 1st! Since today's the 20th anniversary of Spongebob SquarePants, which premiered May 1, 1999, I've decided to do a parody that I've been saving for a while. Based on one of my favorite episodes: Spongebob Meets The Strangler.
I'd like to thank you to Stephen Hillenburg for making one of the best cartoons out there. I'm looking forward to the SpongeBob's 20th Birthday special coming soon!
Also, tomorrow's the 3rd year anniversary of The Loud House!
At Lincoln's elementary school, the white haired boy was called into the principal's office. "You wanted to see me sir?"
"Yes, have a seat Lincoln."
Lincoln sat down.
"Lincoln, it has come to my attention that you are the most hardworking student in your class to never miss a day of Litter Patrol Duty, so the school would like to honor you with an award."
Lincoln smiled. "An award? Wow. I'd be so honored."
"But you get it after your after school litter patrol."
"I'll make you real proud, sir."
After school, Lincoln went outside with a bag and a stick to collect the trash. He was also wearing a hat that said "Litter bugs me" on it.
"Litter." He picked up the wrapper with the stick. "Looks like someone missed the trash basket, huh Mr. Candy wrapper? Kids these days."
Then another wrapper was seen. "Another one. The place was spotless this morning." He picked it up. "Well, at least it's all over now."
Then more litter spread onto the yard. Lincoln rapidly picked them all and grew exhausted. Then one more piece of trash landed near him.
"Where is all this litter coming from?!" Lincoln yelled. Then he saw a man in his car. The man left a trail of litter nearby. Lincoln narrowed his eyes. "Not on my watch."
Lincoln walked up to the man. "Sir, I'll have you know it's against the law to litter."
"So?" The man said. "What are you gonna do? Call the police?"
Suddenly, police officers arrived.
"Yes." Lincoln replied smugly. The cops arrested the man, putting lots of handcuffs on him. Principal Huggins came outside.
"How goes it, Lieutenant?"
"Well, let's just say that litterbug over there saved room for his just desserts."
"Well, I came to give you your award and-" Then the principal gasped when he clearly saw the man who was getting arrested. "Lincoln, don't you know who that is?"
"Who?"
"That's the Tattletale Strangler!"
"Who?"
"The Tattletale Strangler!" Huggins gave Lincoln a photo of the guy, who was a criminal. "He's promised to strangle anyone who turns him in!"
"Would he really strangle a kid?"
Lincoln sees the Strangler growling at him. Lincoln and Huggins get startled. "He seems kinda angry with us, eh Principal?"
Lincoln noticed the principal is gone. "Principal? Principal?"
The police officers sent the Strangler to the police car.
"You're doing time, Strangler." Officer Johnson said. "Hard time."
Lincoln walked up to the officers. "Hey officers. So, he's going to jail right?"
"Strangler?" Officer Nancy said.
"Yeah, Strangler."
"Oh yeah, he's going to jail for a long time."
The Strangler draws something on the back of the drivers headrest, and flips it to reveal the exact likeness of Lincoln's face.
"Hey, that looks like me." Lincoln said.
Strangler growls and attacks the headrest, representing what he was gonna do to Lincoln. Lincoln screams.
"Don't worry Lincoln. He won't be able to get you." Officer Nancy assures.
"Yeah, we chained him up real good." Officer Johnson said. "He'll never get away."
"Oops, not again."
It's revealed the Strangler has escaped and his handcuffs are in his seat.
"Yep, he got away."
Lincoln screams and panics. "You nice officers will protect me, right? I'm just a kid!"
"Sorry kid, we ain't bodyguards." Officer Nancy said.
"Yeah, give us a call if you see him again, Mr. Tattletale." Officer Johnson said. The two officers drove off, leaving dust that makes Lincoln cough.
"Those officers are right. I need a bodyguard."
Lincoln went back into the school and told his gym teacher about his situation.
"Coach, there's this crazy guy after me! I need a bodyguard!"
Coach Pacowski chuckles. "I'm not a championship brestler for nothing. That's a boxer/wrestler. When he sees my moves, he'll be running scared. So where is this bully, huh? At the arcade? The park? What does he look like, kid?"
Lincoln showed the coach the picture of The Tattletale Strangler. "This would be him, Coach."
"The Tattletale Strangler?!" The coach screamed like a little girl and ran away.
Lincoln went all over town trying to find any tough guy who would protect him, but they were all terrified of the Strangler. The kid was now at a bus stop. "That's it. I've gotta get outta out of town till I can find a bodyguard."
"Bodyguard huh? I might be able to help you out." Lincoln sees a man sitting on a bench, but his face is covered by a newspaper.
"You don't understand mister. I need protection from the scariest guy in town. Here's his picture."
The man reveals his face, which turns out to be the Tattletale Strangler with a mustache. "He doesn't look so tough."
"I tattled on him and now he wants to strangle me with his diabolical hands. I hope he at least washed them."
The Strangler laughs sinisterly as he shows his dirty hands. He was about to strangle Lincoln when a bus came. The people watched so the Strangler stopped and the bus left.
"Dang it. There's too many witnesses around here." He speaks to Lincoln. "Listen kid, I could be your bodyguard. Here's my card."
He hands Lincoln a fake ID card with the words "Tattletale Strangler" crossed out and "Bodyguard" underneath.
"Hey, do you think I'm stupid or something?" Lincoln questioned.
"Uh..what do you mean?"
"This card expired yesterday."
"Oh, well, it's still in good use just for today."
"Hmm...ok. You're hired. I feel safer already. What's next?"
"Well, that maniac could be anywhere. Wearing a disguise."
He pointed at a guy in a squirrel costume. "He could be in that squirrel costume."
He points at Chandler. "Or that kid."
"And look at this litter he could've left behind." Lincoln pointed at a wrench, a brick, and a piece of paper. He picked the paper up. "A receipt for the Phoney Baloney Mustache Emporium?"
The Strangler took the receipt. "Uh, that's mine."
"Oh bodyguard, my body is in your guarding hands. What should we do first?"
"Well, I suggest we go to a nice quiet secluded location. Like behind a dumpster or a dark alley."
"Why hang out at those places? Let's go to my house. My family is out right now so we've got the whole house to ourselves."
"Perfect. Then no one can hear you being strangled, I mean protected."
"Oh, ok."
The Strangler smiled evilly at the viewers.
"But first I need to buy some new comics from the comic store." Lincoln said.
The Strangler looked back at Lincoln. "Huh? Oh yeah, sure. But let's make it quick."
Lincoln and his "bodyguard" are at the comic book store. Lincoln looks at two issues. "Hmm...Mutant Reptiles from Outer Space or Mutant Reptiles from Another Place? Outer Space or Another Place? Which issue do you think I should get, Bodyguard?"
"Whichever one gets us to your house quicker."
"I'll take both!"
Now Lincoln was paying for his comics. But then he saw another comic that caught his attention. "Ooh, a new Ace Savvy issue!"
He went over to get it. The Strangler sighed in annoyance. Then on the walk back home, Lincoln and the Strangler were at a food stand as Lincoln tried a free sample.
"Mmm, this stuff on a stick is actually pretty good. You should try some, Bodyguard."
"Can we just go to your house?"
Lincoln and the Strangler finally arrived at the Loud House. "Here we are, the Loud residence. Bodyguard, let me take this opportunity to say you're the best bodyguard a fellow could ever have."
"Alright, enough with the sappy talk. Open the door so I can strangle you, er, I mean choke you, uh, no, I mean crush you with my, uh, I mean-"
"Protect me?"
"Yeah, thanks."
"Don't mention it, Strangler. (gasps) I mean, Bodyguard." Lincoln checked his pocket. "Now where did I put that key?"
Twenty minutes later
Lincoln checked his other pocket as the Strangler was steaming. "I can't seem to find it."
"Forget the key! There's gotta be another way in." The Strangler said. Charles the dog, was outside and he spotted the Strangler. Thinking Lincoln was in danger, Charles charged and bit the Strangler on the butt. The Strangler screamed.
"Charles, no!"
"Get this dog off me!"
Lincoln tried to pull Charles off. "I'm trying but his teeth are really gripped onto you!"
The Strangler ran around screaming as Lincoln tried to get Charles off.
Two hours later
The man still had Charles on him as he ran and screamed. Finally, he took the dog off himself. Lincoln took Charles.
The Strangler now had a big bandage on his butt.
"Sorry about Charles, Bodyguard." Lincoln said. "I guess he thought you were some intruder. I'll just get the key from under the mat and we can go inside."
The Strangler was shocked when he heard this. All this time the key was under the mat! His head exploded with anger.
"Ah, there you are." Lincoln used the key to unlock the door. "Now to finally get inside."
The Strangler came up behind him, looking ready to strangle Lincoln. Lincoln opened the door and they went inside.
"Step inside."
"Close the door." The Strangler closed the door.
"Well, here we are."
"I've finally got you!" The Strangler smiled evilly as he was about to strangle the kid. "Now you're gonna-"
Suddenly, the lights were turned on and Lincoln's family and friends appeared.
"SURPRISE!" A banner is shown. It says "Congratulations to Lincoln Loud, Best Hardworking Student!"
The Strangler smiled nervously as he hid his arms behind his back.
Lincoln was surprised. "A surprise party to celebrate all my hard work at school? How'd you guys know?"
"Your principal told us, and we gave out invitations!" Rita explained.
"Let's boogie!" Clyde said.
Lincoln joined the party and everyone was having a good time, except for the Strangler, who just sat on the couch frustrated
When the party was over, Lincoln said goodbye to all his friends. "Bye Clyde, Bye Stella, Bye Zach, Bye Rusty, Bye Liam, Bye Principal, Bye Mrs. Johnson, Bye all the others!"
Lincoln's family had left too.
"We've got some errands to run!" Lynn Sr. said. "We'll be back later, champ!"
"Ok, see ya later!" Lincoln said and went back inside. "Well, looks like it's just me and you, Bodyguard."
The bodyguard woke up. "Wha-huh? So were all alone now?"
"Just you and me."
The Strangler laughed evilly. But then, Lincoln's family came back and so did his friends. Lincoln's family had brought back party supplies.
"Happy birthday, Lincoln!"
"You guys remembered my birthday!"
"Let's boogie some more!" Clyde cheered. Everyone went inside to party again, and the Strangler went to sit back on the couch again.
The party was over. Lincoln say his goodbyes once again. His family had more errands to run.
"Thanks for coming." He shuts the door. "Ah, alone again."
The Strangler walked up to him. "Is it true? Everyone's gone?"
"Uh huh."
"No more parties today? You've got everything you need now. Nobody's left? We're completely alone?"
"Yep."
"In that case-"
"That was a great party, huh Lincoln?" Leni appeared out of nowhere.
"Grr! Sorry blondie, you've got to go!" The Strangler picked up Leni and was about to send her outside.
"Wait, Leni's my sister. We can totally her." Lincoln said.
"Well I can't take any chances. For all I know, she could be the Strangler."
"I'm the Strangler?" Leni said worried. "Oh, I should've known! I gotta turn myself in!"
Leni jumped out the window. Lincoln facepalmed.
"I wonder if those cops caught the Strangler by now."
"They haven't!" The Strangler ripped off the fake mustache. "Because I'm the Strangler!"
"Aha! I knew it!"
"Wait, what? You knew?"
"Yeah, I figured it out when we came to my place. It became so obvious. The way you were acting, and that phoney mustache."
"Aw man, this was the best mustache I could afford at the party store."
Suddenly, everyone (except for Leni) came back to the house.
"Did someone say party?" Mr. Grouse said.
The Strangler freaked out and jumped out the window. He ran away. "I can't take it!"
Then the cops showed up.
"There you are Strangler!" Officer Johnson said. "We got a call from a white haired boy who said you were in disguise. Now you're going to jail."
"I don't care!" The Strangler yelled. "Just get me away from this place! Far, far away!"
The officers shrugged and put the Strangler in the car. Then they drove off.
The police officers sent the Strangler to jail. He was now in his cell.
"Well, the Strangler is finally put behind bars." Officer Nancy said proudly.
"And this time we'll have to keep a close eye on him." Officer Johnson said.
"Well, at least I'm away from that white haired twerp." The Strangler said.
"Hey Mac." The Strangler turned around to see Leni in the same cell. "What're you in for?"
