Chapter 61: Ronnie Anne-igans
A parody of the episode: Shellback Shenanigans.
I'd like to give credit to DarthWill3 for the chapter suggestion and ideas. This was one of the most complex chapters I ever wrote, and it turned out pretty good.
At school, Lincoln is at his locker talking on his phone to Ronnie Anne.
"It'll be fun spending some time with you this weekend." Lincoln said. "Ok, later loser."
After Lincoln was done talking, he noticed his younger siblings, Lucy, the twins, and Lisa coming up to him.
"So who were you talking to?" Lola asked.
"If you must know, it was Ronnie Anne. She's visiting our place tomorrow."
The girls squealed.
"Are you going on a date with your girlfriend?" Lana asked excitedly.
"She's not my girlfriend! We're just friends!"
"But you too would make such a cute couple." Lola said.
"Too bad!"
From a corner of the hallway, Lena overheard the conversation and was curious. She saw Lincoln's friends, Rusty, Liam, and Zach walking over. She recognized them.
"Halt!" She stopped them. "Are friends with that white haired kid over there?"
"Yeah, what's it to ya?" Zach said.
"I just wanted to know...is it true he has a romantic relationship with the one they call Ronnie Anne?"
"Well, I'm not sure about that." Rusty said. "But I think he likes her. I mean like likes her."
"I thought she liked liked him." Liam said
"Interesting." Lena said and walks away. She goes to her locker. "I'll have to track down this female, for I have a plan."
The next day at her father's restaurant, Lena was enjoying her sundae while scheming. Her father had just opened up the restaurant.
"Hey sweetie, how's the ice cream?" Her father Bruce asked.
"It's delectable as usual Daddy. And this time you didn't add the cherry on top."
Just then, Bobby and Ronnie Anne entered the restaurant.
"Bobby, this place looks pretty cool." Ronnie Anne said as she looked around. "I hope the desserts are good too."
"You bet they are, Ronnie Anne. They've got every ice cream flavor you could imagine."
Lena paid attention to the two siblings as she heard Ronnie Anne's name. "Ronnie Anne? She's here?"
The two siblings walked up to the counter where they looked at a menu. Lena sneaked behind Ronnie Anne and took out a scanning device. She used it to scan Ronnie Anne, gathering information about her. Then she went back to her seat.
"Good thing I invented this baby." Lena pressed a button on the device and a holographic screen was shown. Lena read the info about Ronnie Anne. "Let's see here...Ronnie Anne, the toughest girl in school. Likes pranks, video games, punching Lincoln, etc."
She turns the screen off. "Alright, now that I've found out Ronnie Anne's interests, it's time to move onto the next part of my plan."
Ronnie Anne and Bobby ordered one sundae they could share and sat at a table.
"Go ahead sis, give it a taste." Bobby assured.
Ronnie Anne tastes the ice cream. "Mmm. It tastes like abuelita's churro apple pies!"
"Told ya."
Then Lena walked over to their table. "Excuse me ma'am, would you be interested in entering a video game tournament at Gus Games n Grub? It's a once in a month event." She showed Ronnie Anne a poster.
"Video game tournament?" Ronnie Anne replied. "That sounds awesome, but don't you need a pass for that?"
"I've got two passes right here." Lena held out two passes. "One for you and one for a partner. Here, take these ones."
"Wow. Really?"
Lena nodded.
"Well, thanks."
"Don't mention it. The tournament begins in thirty minutes. I suggest you take a friend or a family member with you. Probably the latter."
"Oooh, pick me sis!" Bobby said excitedly. "You know we make a pretty good team."
"Sure, why not? You've been improving with your button mashing. Let's go!"
The siblings start to leave but then they come back.
"We'll go after we finish our sundae." Ronnie Anne said.
"Right." Bobby agreed. The two had forgotten that they had plans to hang out with Lincoln and Lori. Lena walked away and quietly did an evil laugh.
Back at her house, Lena got to work with the next part of her plan. She got out a robotic vehicle with artificial skin. "I knew my robot vehicles would come in handy. If my reasonings are correct, as Lincoln's so called girlfriend I'll be able to get inside the Loud house and obtain blueprints on Lisa's greatest invention. Then I'll copy the invention and destroy Lisa once and for all. But first, my robot needs some adjustments."
At the Loud house, Lincoln heard the doorbell ring.
"That must be Ronnie Anne." Lincoln went to answer the door. When he opened it, he was stunned at what he saw. It was "Ronnie Anne", (Lena in disguise) who looked different. She was wearing a midriff, long sweatpants, sandals, and hair fully let down.
"Hey Lincoln." She greeted.
Lincoln blushed. "Buh...buh...buh...buh-"
"So can I come in or what?"
"Buh...buh...buh…"
Becoming impatient, Lena snapped her fingers at him. "Hello?"
Lincoln snapped out of it. "Oh, uh, s-sorry Ronnie Anne, you just look really nice. Come inside."
"Ronnie Anne" enters the house. Then Lincoln's sisters notice her and rush over. They all greet Ronnie Anne.
"Ronnie Anne, you look really nice in that outfit." Leni complimented. "And I like what you did with your hair."
"Yeah, thanks."
"Hey, did Bobby set you on a date with my brother?" Lori asked.
"Are you guys even dating?" Luna asked.
"Where are you two gonna hang?" Lynn asked.
The sisters asked lots of questions. Lena got irritated. Lincoln intervened.
"Guys, guys! Enough already! Can't me and Ronnie Anne hang out without you guys pestering us?"
"Yeah, what he said." "Ronnie Anne" said.
"Oh, you two want alone time. How romantic." Lola teased. Then the sisters giggled as they left.
"Now Lincoln, do you mind if I stay here all day?"
"No. Not at all." Then Lincoln gets a call on his walkie talkie. He takes it out.
"Lincoln? Are you there?" It was Clyde.
"Hey Clyde, what's up?"
"Are you free to hang out later today?"
"Sorry Clyde, no can do. Ronnie Anne wants to out at my place all day."
"All day? Oh, I get it. You want alone time with your special lady."
"Clyde, it's not like that."
"It's ok Lincoln. I think I know what's going on. Tell me about your special day with your special lady later today."
He hung up. He looked at "Ronnie Anne" awkwardly. "So...want to play some video games?"
An hour later, Clyde goes to Gus' Games n Grub. When he heads inside, he sees something off: Ronnie Anne playing in the arcade. She and Bobby were competing with two other contestants with a crowd gathered around them watching.
"Ronnie Anne? I thought she was hanging out with Lincoln."
Back at the Loud house, Lincoln and "Ronnie Anne" were playing a video game: Mega Brawlers Turbo Fighter. Lena wasn't into this kind of stuff, but she was starting to get the hang of it.
"I'm gonna destroy you this time!" "Ronnie Anne" said.
"Are you sure?" Lincoln retorted. "I mean you usually kick my butt at this game, but I've been beating you in these past rounds. It's like you're letting me win."
"Letting you win?" "Ronnie Anne" laughed hard. "You're so funny, Linky Winky!"
Lincoln was surprised by that nickname. Even Clyde flinched when he heard it over his walkie talkie.
"Linky Winky?" Lincoln said to himself. He was so stunned by the nickname that "Ronnie Anne" beat his fighting character and won the round.
She cheered. "I whooped you maximus gluteus!"
Lincoln gave her a look.
"I mean, I whooped your butt!"
Then Lisa walked downstairs and Lena saw her.
"Don't mind me." Lisa said. "I'm just going to the basement."
This is my chance to get those blueprints! Lena thought.
"Uh, I'm have to go pee." She told Lincoln and dashed off. She ran upstairs into Lisa's room and began to rapidly search for the blueprints. But Lisa comes back from the basement sooner than expected and catches "Ronnie Anne" in her lab.
"Ahem." She got Lena's attention. Lena tried to come up with an explanation.
"Wait, don't tell me." Lisa said. "You've come here to volunteer for one of my experiments."
"I...Yeah, that's exactly why I'm here." Lena replied.
"Oh, I have one experiment in mind." Lisa said. Then Lena was strapped to the machine Lily was once strapped to. (from the episode-Changing the Baby)
"Fear not Ronalda." Lisa assured. "Once this test is completed, I shall let you have a sucker of your selection."
"Oh boy..." Lena said worried.
As Lisa throws the switch, there's an ear shattering, bloodcurdling scream mixed with the sound of buzzing electrical voltage. It could be heard from outside of the house. Lena looks a bit cooked, but her robot transport is more damaged. Just about every system is malfunctioning. Lisa's machine has reduced it to a pitiful state where it can only crawl desperately on the floor.
"Perhaps I used a little too much powder." Lisa said. "Better put up warnings for future references."
Lincoln and the other sisters heard the scream and ran to Lisa's room to check what was going on. What they see horrifies them to the core. Lincoln grabbed Lisa by the collar and held her up.
"WHAT DID YOU DO, YOU MONSTER?!"
"I-i-i-i-it's not my fault! She volunteered for the experiment!"
Then Lena comes up with the perfect improvised scheme.
"Linky Winky, hold me!" She spreads her arms out to Lincoln. Everyone gathers around and tears start to form. Lincoln strains as he wraps his arms around the robot.
"No offense Ronnie Anne, but you're...heavier than you look."
"Hey!"
Lincoln winced. "I said no offense!"
Lena uttered a fake cough. "It's alright, Linky Winky. I guess you...let yourself go when you start...going."
Luan tried hard not to laugh at the pun, especially when everyone was in such a tragic scene.
Lori sniffs. "How am I going to explain this to Bobby?"
Lena has a "final request". She looks at Lisa.
"Lisa, I have a final request. Can I-(cough) can I see whatever cool new gadget thingy you're working on?"
"I don't see why not since you won't have enough time to tell anyone before you...Well, I'll go get the blueprints." Lisa goes to a cabinet.
"I have a request too." Lincoln said. "I want one final kiss from you, Ronnie Anne."
The sisters gasp. Lena is clearly disgusted.
"Yeah, I don't think so." She protested. Then a familiar voice is heard downstairs.
"Hey lame o, where are you?!"
Thinking quickly, Lena uses her right robotic arm to drag Lincoln down to her direction, letting his lips meet those of her mask. The sisters gasp again, and there's another one at the doorway. The real Ronnie Anne is here. Everyone sees her.
"Ronnie Anne, I didn't know you had a twin sister." Leni said.
"What the heck is going on here?" Ronnie Anne questioned as she was confused. In the midst of the confusion, Lena spots the blueprints in Lisa's hands. She smiles malevolently, then looks to the real Ronnie Anne.
"He's all yours, Sappiago!" Jetpack attached, she ejects from the robot, rushes towards Lisa and snatches the blueprints.
"Runaway head!" Leni screamed.
Lena tears off her mask. "Good thing I was wearing this, or that would've been REALLY gross."
But just as Lena is about to zoom out of the house and declare she's home free, she suddenly remembers that her jetpack is low on battery. That's when it runs out.
"I knew I shoulda had this thing recharged…"
She plummets down. "HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELP!"
Ronnie Anne manages to catch her as she gets outside and gives her a glare. Lena chuckles nervously. She runs off, going back to her liar. Ronnie Anne goes to confront Lincoln.
"Ok Lincoln, I want an explanation. Clyde told me you were hanging out with another girl when I was at a video game tournament."
"Wait, you went to a video game tournament without me?" Lincoln questioned.
"That's not the issue right now. What exactly was going on here?"
Lincoln's sisters came over.
"Don't be mad at Lincoln." Lori butted in, defending her brother. "It was Lena."
"Yeah, she duped us." Lana said.
"Indeed." Lisa said. "She disguised herself as you so she could steal my blueprints for my greatest invention."
"We had no idea she'd go so far as to prey on Lincoln's feelings for you." Lola said.
"And that mask she wore was pretty convincing." Leni admitted.
"Ok, tell me more about this Lena girl." Ronnie Anne demanded.
After ten minutes of explanations, Ronnie Anne now understands.
"Wow. I'm glad you guys told me all this." Ronnie Anne said.
"Well, now that everything's explained, I'm gonna go now." Lori said. "Bobby just texted me and says he wants to hang out. Apparently, he and Clyde won a video game tournament."
Lori left.
"Guys, If you don't mind, can I have some alone time with your brother?" Ronnie Anne asked.
"Sure thing dude." Luna said. The other sisters agreed and went back inside the house.
"So lame o, I wanted to give you something special." Ronnie Anne said..
"What is it?"
Ronnie Anne then grabbed Lincoln by the collar and kissed him...right on the lips! He blushed but was satisfied. Neither of them were aware that Lori had witnessed the kiss. She smiled at the romantic scene.
