"Hey, how's your shoulder?" asked Antonio as he came and passed Hailey's desk on the way to Voight's office. "Get ready guys." The second-in-command waved a case file. Everyone groaned. They hadn't even finished yesterday's paperwork.
"Went to Med last night, it was fine," said Hailey.
"Your face is a mess," Adam chimed in.
"Gee, thanks. Just something every girl needs to hear," laughed Hailey. "Yeah, wanted to pick up coffee, but I don't feel like being asked about my abusive husband," said Hailey.
"It happened before?" asked Kevin.
"Yeah, went to a grocery store with a bruised cheek and torn lips. A lady stopped me and convinced me to report my abusive husband to the police. She didn't believe me when I said I was a cop and got beaten by a suspect," she rolled her eyes.
"It would've been more awkward if you have a man with you," Kim giggled.
"Yeah, I don't really want to being seen together with you with that face, I would've been bashed by that old lady," said Kevin.
"Yeah, leave it to Jay," said Adam. They all laughed as Jay came up the stairs. He put a cup of coffee on Hailey's desk. "Speak of the devil," muttered Kim.
"My hero. This is why I don't need to go to coffee shop," Hailey flashed him a smile and 'thank you' nod.
"We have a case," Voight said. Antonio filled them in on the case. It was another drug case with underage courier whose stomach was torn.
"Halstead, you go with Atwater and Ruzek," Voight announced. They were gonna meet at the crime scene. "Upton, you're with me."
Hailey was surprised that Voight took her to the field, despite ordering her to ride the desk not even an hour ago. She didn't bother to confirm whether he changed his mind or forgot, she grabbed her weapon while grinning. She missed Jay's hurt face, but didn't miss the snickers behind her.
"What?" she turned to face Kevin, Adam, and Kim who were all grinning.
"Don't go to a coffee shop," said Kevin.
"Or grocery store," added Kim. They all laughed. Hailey cannot help but laughed, avoiding the sergeant's questioning look as they all went to the garage.
"You stayed behind me, and only me. You're attached to my hip," instructed Voight to Hailey. Hailey nodded.
"Copy that. I thought I'm not changing partner?" Hailey dared to ask.
"Today, it's either me or the desk," growled Voight. Hailey knew better than to ask further.
Jay followed Adam and Kevin to their car. Judging from Voight's order, his partnering day with Hailey is over. Both Adam and Kevin didn't say much, they figured he needed some space for grieving. Jay appreciated the silent concern; he wasn't in the mood for a chat anyway.
However, he was really hurt. A couple hours prior, Hailey said that she wasn't going to leave him. Turns out she agreed, no, was happy, to change partner, judging from her smile when Voight announced the partner swap. Was that only sweet words, to calm him down, to help him sleep better? Sighing, he promised himself to not trust anyone anymore. He was in a mess when Erin left without even saying goodbye, he did not wish to fall into another hole.
"Can I ask you something?" asked Hailey to Jay when they met in the locker room later that day. The case had hit a dead end, and they were dismissed.
"Yeah?"
"Did Voight say something to you the other day? About separating us?" asked Hailey, closing the door.
"Yeah, he did," said Jay. "Figured it's about time you stop putting up with my crap," Jay shrugged. "I appreciate you looking out for me, Hailey. You've been helping me a lot and I don't know how I can thank you. But if you want to change partner, I'd like a heads up."
"What…" Hailey was perplexed.
"I thought we are good," Jay dropped to the bench. "Am I wrong?"
"We are good," stressed Hailey. She stepped towards Jay, but stopped once she realised what Jay was implying.
"Why are you riding with Sarge?" Jay looked hurt. "Last night you said that you're not leaving. How can I trust you?"
"It was either him or the desk, his quote. Of course it's him," said Hailey aloud. "Or maybe you shouldn't trust me and ask him instead," she hissed in a dangerously low voice, equally hurt. "You know, we cannot be partners if you don't trust me." The door was opened and Kim appeared. She sensed the tension in the room and backtracked.
"Sorry, go on," Kim addressed no one in particular.
"No Kim, please. We're done here," said Hailey. She grabbed her bag and slammed her locker. "Night, guys." With that, she left. Jay felt dread filled him. He rubbed his face and took a deep breathe.
"Sorry, Jay," said Kim.
"It's okay. To be honest, the interruption was welcomed," said Jay. Kim opened her locker and grabbed her bag.
"Yeah, I can see that. You're having a partners' tiff," said Kim.
"Call it whatever you want," sighed Jay.
"You know what, judging from my history, I shouldn't be giving a partnership advice. But I know when you meet the right partner, like Voight and Al, you hold on to her," said Kim.
"Yeah, you came two minutes too late," said Jay. "Thanks, Kim." He went to the door.
"Hey, Jay?" He stopped. "She's a good partner. I don't know what you fought about, neither do I wanna know. But make it right, Antonio is ready to dump me for her," Kim joked.
"You're not bad either, Kim. I'll drill it into his head anytime," said Jay. Kim smiled thanking him, and he went to the parking lot. Hailey's car was no longer there.
"Geez, Halstead, good job," he muttered to himself. He went to Hailey's place. After circling her block three times, he didn't see her car. He thought about it for a while before calling her. She picked up on the third call.
"Jay, I'm in the middle of something. I'll call you when I'm done," said Hailey. She hung up immediately. Knowing he shouldn't be alone, he ended up going to Will's.
"Hey, are you at home?" Jay asked as soon as Will picked up.
"Yeah. You wanna come over?" asked Will.
"Yeah. Owen's home?" He needed distraction.
"Nope, He's at Helen's, Nat's on shift. You wanna come see me or Owen?" Will pretended to sound hurt. Jay gave a weak laugh.
"Him, of course. We haven't finished playing police and fireman," said Jay. "I'll be there in 15."
"I'll order pizza. The usual?" asked Will. After giving his order, Jay hung up. When he arrived, Will didn't waste time to ask about last night's phone call.
"What was that last night? I nearly jumped in the car," Will asked when he opened the door. Jay sighed.
"Nightmare," answered Jay.
"You don't usually call when you have nightmare, Jay. Not that I am disturbed or anything, it was just weird. I thought something happened," said Will.
"No, well… I dreamed about you. Actually, about everyone that had left. Mom, dad, Al, Erin, Mouse. You, Hailey," said Jay.
"Us?"
"Yeah. I don't know. You were there. She was, too. You all left," said Jay.
"So you decided to call me to check that I hadn't died or left," concluded Will.
"It was either you or Hailey," Jay shrugged, eating the pizza. "Figured you'd be pissed less."
"I don't think so. She would understand," Will disagreed. He was still wondering what the relationship between them was. As far as he knew, they were just partners, maybe friends. But Hailey's constant presence at Jay's side lately made Will thought whether there was something more. However he knew that Jay would not leave him out of the loop about something this important. Jay had a lot of baggage though, so he needed to sort them out first before jumping into relationship with anyone.
"I crashed at her couch last night. If I went to check on her she might shoot me in the head. Not to mention it's inappropriate and creepy," Jay rolled his eyes. Will chuckled. "She did check on me after we hung up, with a weapon drawn," Jay continued. Will burst out laughing.
"I thought you and her…" wondered Will. Jay shook his head.
"No no no. It's gonna be too much of a trouble, man. We work together, remember? Moreover, I'm not in the dating pool right now. Don't wanna burden anyone with my baggage," Jay explained. "You would be first to know when that person exists. Now, can we talk about something else?" Will smirked; relieved to have lightened the conversation and elicit a blushing face from Jay.
"I think I understand why everyone left, Will. I pushed them away," sighed Jay after finishing his slice.
"Jay, mom and dad didn't leave. They died," said Will.
"I pushed Hailey away. I said I didn't trust her," said Jay.
"You were nursing your broken heart after Erin left, she must understood why you said that to her," Will was confused. What was this about?
"No, I said that today. I misunderstood. Damn, Will. She's my partner. My best friend. And all I've been doing is yelling at her, accusing her of something. I bet while she didn't want to change partner earlier, she wants to now," Jay rambled. "And I was wrong. I said people left me. No, I push people away. I pushed her away, and I might push you away later," Jay shook his head.
"So what? I cannot be pushed away that easily," said Will. He moved his chair beside Jay, putting his hand on Jay's shoulder. "And I think Hailey's not that easy to get rid of too. She's loyal and understanding," he added.
"See? She doesn't deserve me as a partner. I'm gonna tell Voight to partner her with someone else," said Jay.
"Then yes, you're pushing her away. Jay, you cannot play victim here. You gotta work to keep people around you. I, you cannot get rid of. I'm your family. We've drifted apart once, it's not happening again. You're stuck with me. But her, hell, if I have a friend who stuck by me like that, I'm gonna chain her to me." Will was also concerned about the funeral. Jay needed someone to hold him grounded tomorrow. Jay didn't say anything for a while.
"I don't feel good. Can I stay here tonight?" Jay asked. Will became concerned. He held Jay's forehead and felt his pulse. "My head's throbbing, I'm really tired," Jay elaborated.
"Sure. You can sleep in Owen's room," said Will. Jay went to the bathroom. A few minutes later, he went to Owen's room. Will followed him, giving him Tylenol.
"We'll leave at 10 tomorrow, we'll stop by your place to get your suit," said Will. He tucked Jay in Owen's Donald Duck blanket, just like he did so often when they were little. He stroked Jay's hair, knowing it calmed him down, at least as a child. They were the best of buddies as kids, but he lost track of Jay's habits when Jay left for the Army. They lived together briefly, when Will just got settled in Chicago, and after they each broke up with Erin and Nina. That's when he learned about Jay's PTSD. Jay caught Will's hand when he stroked Jay's shoulder.
"Sleep. It's okay," said Will. He heard the unspoken question. "I'm gonna stay until you're asleep," whispered Will. Jay nodded. Will smiled to himself as he got settled sitting on the bed, leaning back on the headboard. He put his hand on Jay's head and absentmindedly stroking his hair.
Will felt Natalie shook his shoulder to wake him up. He looked up at his fiancée.
"Everything okay?" asked Natalie, whispering.
"Yeah. Rough day for him," Will didn't elaborate. "When we were little, sometimes I tucked him in. It helped his nightmares and fear of the storm. He always came to my room and hijacked my bed, and we ended up sleeping together. He gave nasty kicks and punches when he slept," Natalie smiled as she was treated to the little Halsteads' life.
"You want to sleep here?" asked Natalie.
"I thought without Owen, we could…" Will smirked mischievously. Natalie slapped his arm.
"No Owen, but Jay's here," she giggled. "And he needs you."
"Alright. I'll go get ready for bed. Can you watch him? Just think of him like Owen," said Will. Natalie laughed.
"Okay. If he wakes up I'll pick him up and carry him around," she said, amused. Will quickly slid outside. Natalie stood on the doorframe to watch her future brother-in-law. She realised that by marrying Will, she would be stuck with Jay as well. Will is very protective of his brother and won't hesitate to defend him from anything. She understood Jay better than expected. Jeff was a Marine, he saw nasty things abroad. It wasn't like flipping the switch. No longer in the service doesn't mean Jay was not in Afghanistan.
Will came back bringing his phone and Jay's after turning both to silent. He knew Jay was not on call tomorrow, so Voight wouldn't call. There was a missed call and text from Hailey. Thinking what he should do, he pecked Natalie's cheek.
"Did he cry? Or wet himself?" teased Will in a whisper.
"If Owen slept like this we won't need baby monitor," said Natalie.
"He has his own moments, Owen is cuter to cuddle," Will rolled his eyes.
"Go, sleep. Donald Duck is waiting." Natalie gave Will a light kiss.
"Yes, ma'am," said Will. Natalie closed the door from outside. Will slid beside Jay.
"Scoot over," he shoved Jay gently. He pulled out his phone under the cover and texted Hailey, letting her know Jay's reason for not replying her message.
Will: Hailey, it's Will. Jay's at my place, and already asleep. I saw your missed call. You're gonna go to the burial tomorrow?
Hailey: Thanks for letting me know. I think so. I'll have to check with Jay.
Will: I haven't said it, but thanks for being there for him.
Hailey: He's my partner, of course.
Will closed his eyes, thinking at which points in life Jay was made to feel unworthy of receiving all the love and attention from his closest people. He wanted nothing than go back in time and beat the pulp out of the people who made Jay feel that way. He wished he could protect Jay from his own demons, just like he did with the thunderstorm when they were little.
Beside him, Jay tossed. Sighing, Will stroked Jay's hair until he calmed down, and drifted to sleep.
I know that in PD it was said that Jay is the older brother, however I read somewhere that it was a dialogue mistake. From their behaviour I feel the writers projected Will as the older and Jay the younger brother (Will is the more thoughtful/concerned one whereas Jay is more stubborn). For this story I'll go with this theory.
