"Sarge, got a minute?" asked Jay the next morning. He got to the district early, and none of his colleagues were present. He thought, now or never. Voight raised his eyebrows.
"I hope this would not be taken the wrong way," began Jay. "I've been through… a lot of things since the fire case. The one when my dad died. Looking back, I was in a really bad place. I owe Hailey a lot, for keeping me on my feet."
"Your point?" asked Voight.
"I want to return the favour to her. Well, not return, but at least I want to thank her. My friend works in Blackhawks ticketing, he managed to secure tickets for a game next week. I want to make sure that we're both off on that day," Jay fidgeted in his chair. He didn't know why he was nervous.
"Alright," said Voight.
"One more thing. We go as friends, just wanna let you know, in case you think otherwise," said Jay.
"Noted. She made sure I know too," said Voight, smirked when he remembered his other detective's sassiness.
"I know," said Jay. After hesitating, he continued, "I don't know whether it reached your desk. I've been attending therapy, voluntary. My past caught up with me after that case, and it wasn't pretty. I'm in a better place now, mostly thanks to my partner. So if you aren't happy about how we roll, about sleeping on each other's couch, and spending time outside of the district, I take the full blame. You can address it with me, not her. It was all on me, she did it for my sake," said Jay. He might be in the doghouse after that bold statement to his boss, but he couldn't risk Hailey taking another accusation or accepting consequence of a suspected in-house romance from Voight.
"I'm not unhappy," Voight shrugged. "From what I heard and seen, you got help. I'm not about to stop you from getting the help you need."
"Thanks," Jay stood up, ready to leave Voight's office when Voight's gruff voice stopped him.
"You going to therapy voluntary was an example of how I need Upton to help me ground you," said Voight, and Jay would swear that he heard humour in Voight's voice. Jay just smirked, and left the office to grab breakfast.
"How did you manage to ask day off for both of us? What did you do?" asked Hailey. They were in the car, doing stakeout. When Hailey arrived to the district earlier, Jay slipped her a form, signed by Voight, with smug face.
"I didn't do anything. I just asked," said Jay.
"Can't believe that just a couple weeks ago, he yelled at you that Platt could hear it downstairs," said Hailey.
"Platt heard it? How did you know?" asked Jay.
"She asked me," said Hailey.
"Yeah… turns out Voight has humanly side in him," Jay laughed.
"He trusts you, when you're not being stupid," smirked Hailey. Upon Jay's rolled eyes, Hailey added, "I do too."
"My pleasure," smirked Jay.
"How was your therapy yesterday?"
"Good, as always. It sucks to talk about things we rather buried down, but in the end, it helps. Kids are always a trigger for me. It sucks, but the therapist said yesterday, nightmares make us human. If we no longer flinch upon seeing disturbing crimes, maybe the job gets to us," said Hailey.
"Point taken," smirked Jay. Kevin's voice from the intercom distracted them.
"Target walking north, approaching you, Jay," said Kevin.
"Copy that," said Jay.
"He's crouching under the red Honda, we lose view," said Hailey.
"Adam, distract him. I'm gonna approach on foot," said Voight. Adam who was standing nearby, holding a cigarette, walked towards the target and dropped his phone. He spun around quickly, with caution in his face. Adam pretended not to notice him.
"Chicago PD!" Voight yelled once he was closer to him. He dashed out towards Hailey and Jay's car, Adam and Voight on his tail.
"Ah, come on!" Hailey jumped out of the car. She hid behind the car and tackled the target.
"I didn't do anything wrong!" argued the target.
"Then why did you run?" asked Adam.
"It's a car bomb," said Kevin who approached them as Hailey put on the cuff.
"We'll take him back to the district," said Kim.
There was no news about Antonio, as far as Voight let them know. Voight did ask Jay to find Gabby, Antonio's sister, who skipped town just a couple months earlier. Jay had trouble contacting her, and asked Matt Casey, her husband, about her whereabout. Or rather, her ex-husband, which explained his cold reaction when Jay went to the firehouse to ask him directly.
A night before the Blackhawks game, Hailey went home early from the district. Her reports were done, she followed up with her CI, and picked up her favourite bottle of wine and Greek food as she went home. She was just done pouring her wine, ready for a quiet night in front of the TV, when Jay called her.
"I think we're off for the weekend?" her words came out harsher than she originally meant.
"I'm not calling about a case. It's Antonio, Voight told us to come to Med," said Jay.
"I just poured a glass of rose," Hailey whined without meaning to. She realised she sounds bad; she didn't ask about Antonio, but complaining about her comfort. That week was a bit stressful for her; they just wrapped the car bombing case, as well as another immigrant smuggling case just before the weekend, and they were a man short, so she was really looking forward for the weekend.
"Finish it. I'll pick you up in 10," said Jay, and Hailey could hear a smirk in his voice.
"Thank you," said Hailey. She grumbled, changed her pyjama bottom into leggings, and shrugged on her coat. She gulped her wine and put the glass on her coffee table. When she was putting on her shoes, she heard Jay's car pulled up outside. She ran outside, locking her door, and jogged to the car. He was still in the clothes he wore to the office.
"Someone's been out," commented Hailey.
"Yeah, doing paperwork in the office," Jay replied dryly. "Finish the wine already?" asked Jay.
"Yeah. Sorry, I was… already in weekend mode," Hailey reasoned. "What's going on with Antonio? I thought we're not talking about it?"
"Yeah. Voight didn't say anything, only told us to come to ER," said Jay.
As they walked into the ER, they didn't find Voight in the waiting room. Jay strolled inside, having known most of the staff because of Will.
"Connor, you see Will? Or Voight?" asked Jay as he saw Dr. Rhodes.
"I cannot tell you, but I don't know who's in Treatment Room 3," said Dr. Rhodes. Jay smirked, clasped him on the shoulder, and went to the closed door. He knocked on the door. Voight peeked through the slightly opened curtain and slipped outside.
"What happened, Sarge?" asked Hailey.
"Not here," Voight herded them to an empty hallway. He shrugged to the direction of Matt Casey who just walked past the ER door.
"Antonio?" asked Casey. Voight nodded.
"And you're here because…" said Jay.
"Because Antonio used to be my friend, even if I'm no longer with his sister," snapped Casey.
"Whoa, whoa. Chill. You just didn't seem interested when I went to the firehouse," said Jay.
"You didn't mention him, you just asked about my ex-wife. Why do you think I would be interested?" snapped Casey.
"Sarge?" asked Jay.
"Antonio had been recovering in an off-the-book clinic. When he overdosed last week, he refused to be admitted here, so I arranged for him to recover somewhere else. Where it wouldn't be recorded in his file. I tried to keep it all under wraps, the less people know, the better. However, I got a call from the doctor there that he relapsed, and they had no choice but to admit him. He was unconscious when he was brought here. Will is his physician, that's why I asked you to come, Jay. And Casey, you sure there is no way to get a hold of Gabby?" asked Voight.
"I can ask her divorce lawyer, but you know, lawyer," Casey rolled his eyes. "Last I heard from her was when she walked out on me, a day before the divorce papers arrived."
"Will!" Jay called. "How is him?"
"He wasn't breathing and was unresponsive when he was brought here, so we intubated him. I have to be honest, it's gonna be a long road for him. And Sergeant, you know this will go in his file," said Will. Voight shrugged.
"Right now, my priority is Antonio. Not Detective Dawson," said Voight.
"Who's Antonio medical proxy?" Will asked April who walked by.
"His sister. We tried to contact her, but…"
"She's in Puerto Rico," said Casey. "What happened when you cannot find the medical proxy?"
"His physician will decide his treatment," said Will. "After he is stable and conscious, we're gonna put a 48 hour hold on him, to see how well he react to the purging of the drugs. We'll go from there," said Will. "You can see him, two at a time. Don't take too long."
Voight walked into the room, and Casey motioned to Jay and Hailey to go with Voight. "I'll go next," he shrugged. Many years had passed, and he knew now that Voight was not the dirty cop he once knew, but some things were irreversible.
"Go ahead," Hailey gave Jay a light shove, knowing Jay would want to see Antonio first. Jay followed Voight inside, and Hailey stood outside, finding herself lost at words with Casey. She knew the firefighter from a few times their jobs cross path, but she had no idea what to say to him.
"You know of his addiction?" asked Casey.
"I was with him when he overdosed," said Hailey. "We were doing surveillance, and suddenly…" she trailed off, remembering the time she held Antonio in the back of the van. She simply thought he had food poisoning, or flu, at the time; because it never crossed her mind that Antonio was an addict.
"What?"
"He threw up in the van. I thought he was just sick, so we just left him there with bucket and blanket, while we went into the suspect's house. I didn't pay attention at his symptoms," said Hailey.
"Don't blame yourself. You work with him, you know him. Guy's as straight as a stick. No one would've thought he overdosed. Hell, I am still in doubt," said Casey.
"You are close with him?" asked Hailey.
"He helped me a lot with some cases. Even before I married, or even dated his sister. Last time I saw him though, he clocked me in the jaw for not following Gabby to Puerto Rico," Casey peeked inside.
"And you're still here," Hailey pointed out.
"Yeah, can't leave a man while he's down," Casey smirked.
"That's very admirable," Hailey said as Voight and Jay exited the treatment room. Hailey slipped inside with Casey following her. She stopped on her track when she saw Antonio. Will already told them that he was intubated, that he was unconscious, but actually seeing him with machines around him startled her. Antonio was always the silent, but strong presence in the room he was in. He isn't afraid to voice his opinions, however different they might be from the others', hence he disagreed a lot with Adam or Voight. Hailey couldn't believe how helpless he was.
"Hailey?" Casey's voice brought her back to the room. He gently guided Hailey to the side of the bed. "It's been said that unconscious people would hear what you said around them," he said.
"Antonio," whispered Hailey. "Come on, man... you have to be strong," Hailey touched Antonio's cold hand.
"You are close?" asked Casey.
"He kept everyone in line," smiled Hailey. "It's not easy seeing him like this."
"No, it's never easy seeing anyone like this," said Casey somberly. "I will try to find your sister and have her fly here to be at your side. Or your father," he said, suddenly getting an idea.
"What?" asked Hailey.
"Why didn't I think of that? Ramon Dawson, can you guys find him?" asked Casey.
"I suppose we can," said Hailey. "Hear that, Antonio? We'll find your family. But until then, we're your family also. I wish we knew about all of this… Kim was pissed, you know," she poked Antonio in the shoulder.
"Sorry guys, we're moving him upstairs," Will poked his head inside.
"I'll see you later," Hailey squeezed Antonio's arm. As Antonio was being rolled outside, she felt Casey lightly pushed him outside the room. She looked at Jay, whose facial expression was unreadable, to others at least. Hailey knew he was putting his wall up.
"Sarge, Casey said that we might be able to find Antonio's dad," said Hailey.
"I'll see what I can do," said Voight.
"What about his kids? Diego? Eva?" asked Casey.
"With their mum. Antonio refused to tell them," said Voight. Casey shrugged.
"Tell me if there is anything I can help. I'll keep trying to contact Gabby. I'll ask Kidd if they keep in contact," Casey shoved his hands in his jeans pocket. "And that's why you shouldn't have someone out of the country as your medical proxy."
"You tell me yours is not Gabby?" teased Jay.
"Nope. Never. Been Severide since I knew him. So far, I'm still alive," said Casey.
"I get it. My proxy is in this hospital most of the time and happened to be a doctor," Jay pointed across the room to Will, smirking proudly.
"When I find Dawson senior's contact number, you'll know it," said Voight. Casey nodded.
"I appreciate you're keeping me in the loop. He was a friend," said Casey. "See you around, Jay, Hailey," he nodded, patted Jay on the shoulder, and left.
"You two, not a word about this to Kim, Adam, or Kevin," said Voight.
"Why?" asked Jay.
"You saw how Kim beat herself about Antonio. I don't want her seeing him like this. And if Adam or Kevin knew, they'd tell her," said Voight. Hailey and Jay nodded. "Now, I'll tell you if anything changes. You are off for the weekend, I'll see you on Monday," said Voight, dismissing them.
"I need to find Will," said Jay, walking to the nurse station. He went to the doctor's lounge as directed by one of the nurses. "Hey, Will."
"Hey," Will quickly stood up from the sofa, where he sat with his head in his hands previously.
"What's wrong?" asked Jay.
"Nothing. You need anything?" Will asked back.
"I'm just coming to tell you I'm going," said Jay. Will sensed something was wrong with Jay, however he was too tired to push. Besides, Hailey was with him.
"Alright. Enjoy the game tomorrow. Come here," Will opened his arms. Jay pulled Will in a tight hug, and Will realised Jay's hands were shaking. "Don't worry. Antonio is in the best place."
"I know," Jay mumbled to Will's shoulder. "Thanks, Will."
"Anytime," said Will. "Sunday, dinner in our place? Owen missed his Uncle Jay," said Will as he pulled back.
"I'll try," said Jay. Will patted his shoulder as he walked outside, meeting Hailey sitting outside the ER.
"Let's go," Jay squeezed her shoulder. Hailey closed her eyes and remembered, a couple months ago, they were in Med when they found out that Olinsky died. Jay also squeezed her shoulder briefly, in an effort to comfort her. "Hailey, wake up."
"I don't sleep," Hailey rolled her eyes, then walked with Jay to his car. Jay drove back to Hailey's place, but it was obvious to both of them that he's not going home. Antonio's condition shook them both, and
"Anything bothering you?" asked Jay as they sat around Hailey's kitchen island. "Beside Antonio's condition, of course." He noticed that Hailey was being very quiet then usual, and had been avoiding eye contact with him since in the hospital.
"I don't agree with Voight. Kim should visit Antonio," said Hailey. Jay was taken aback. He didn't expect that Hailey would be bothered by that. The two women in Intelligence have little in common—and they were not known to be the best of friends, although they were civil and grabbed occasional—more like semi-annual—lunch together.
"Jay, if it happened to you, God forbid, I don't want Voight to hide it from me," said Hailey. "I would want to be there; I would be there."
"Really?" asked Jay.
"Of course. How many times do I have to say that? I got your back," said Hailey. She poured whiskey for both of them. "Hell, Jay, if something happened to me, I want you to be there. I don't want Voight to deny you entry," said Hailey. "But we can't make sure that happened, right? We can just hope."
"Actually, you can," said Jay. "I can be your medical proxy."
"What?" asked Hailey perplexed.
"Well, you hear what Casey said. He has Severide as his proxy. I have Will, he would tell you. If something happened to you, who's your proxy? Your brother is in Iowa. I am a more sensible choice," Jay shrugged. Seeing Hailey's confused expression, he deflated. "You don't have to decide now. Just, think about it."
"You sure?" asked Hailey. She observed Jay closely, noting him being twitchy. He tapped his foot on the floor and played with the glass. He looked anywhere but at her.
"It's either medical proxy or husband," Jay tried to lighten the mood, hid his disappointment at the oncoming rejection.
"You have no trouble, no weight, deciding on my behalf when it comes to it? I always thought it's something no one would want to do," said Hailey.
"I hope I will never make any decision on your behalf, but yeah, I would rather it to be me. If you're okay with that, of course," said Jay.
"Then, of course. Thank you," Hailey walked over and slipped inside Jay's embrace.
"You sure you don't want the Halstead with the medical degree?" joked Jay.
"No, I'm good. I know you'd consult him anyway," smiled Hailey.
I'm back! (Wow last update was October 2019, and there are so many Upstead fanfictions now) I'm not sure what happened but I haven't watched CPD since Jay was shot. I watched the clips through youtube, but I've been binging on Chicago Fire (see my Chicago Fire fanfiction!). But now we are all stuck inside, I figured I'd slowly finish this story...and of course I dragged Casey from Chicago Fire here.
