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Chapter 28

Derailed Temptation


Edward


Thank goodness Charlie chose that exact moment to make sure Bella hadn't done something worse to herself, or perhaps an assassin had invaded her room.

How supremely ironic. I had never had such a good handle on the balance between controlled abandonment and vigilant restraint as today. I enjoyed my beloved Bella to the fullest. From time to time I had the impression that this unsettled her a bit, but she didn't stop me, and I was so full of drive and conviction to finally be able to give her what she craved ... that I underestimated my own growing desire.

I had finally ventured this far. I felt the infinitely tender skin on the inside of her thigh, right next to her tempting center.

Perhaps I should tell her that I could feel the beginnings of her neatly shaved hair as well as the roots - so for my sake she could save herself the trouble.

The blood pulsed frantically under my fingertips, tempting me further. The thin fabric of her panties could not hide the fine curls or the swells and hollows from me. But something else captured my attention. When I finally felt the wet evidence of her desire for me for the first time, I was overwhelmed by the desire to taste her.

For days now I had suppressed this intention, not wanting to push her into anything, and even before I could reconsider the idea, my subconscious had seized the unique opportunity to taste her without having to make a daring advance. In retrospect, if I told myself enough, perhaps there was a touch of rationality in testing out my reaction to her taste in a relatively safe way. A mistake! For she was formidable. How could this have happened to me? Had I already become so arrogant? And this after the recently experienced disaster and my careful deliberations? To have the scent of her arousal, which surrounded us for a while now, right in front of my nose, was quite bearable - I had had enough opportunities in the past weeks to get used to it sufficiently. Probably because of that I weighed myself in supposed security. How big could the difference be?

Nothing could ever have prepared me for the intense revelation as the tip of my tongue slid far too hungrily over the tip of my finger and the traces of her lust hit my taste buds.

It was so much more overwhelming than anticipated. The taste was unmistakably Bella and yet so different from her blood or anything else about her. A completely different side of me was addressed that abruptly revived, rebelled... Mutated into a libidinous greed. The animal in me had awakened and announced itself with an excited growl. I wanted her. With skin and hair. A spark would be enough and there would be no turning back.

I froze to let my vibrating body paralyze and my mind take over again.

No, it was not allowed to happen like that - never! This was my Bella. I was not allowed to hurt her, touch her in this state or even pounce on her!

And at that moment Charlie knocked on the door.

On the verge of despair, I relievedly took advantage of the distraction, literally clinging to his jumbled thoughts, in order to find my way halfway back to the present. I had to hold on somewhere without destroying anything.

Straining, in the highest concentration, I raised my arms above my head and clawed at my forearms so hard it hurt. The pain was immensely helpful in pushing down the animalistic urges.

"Edward? What's wrong?", Bella whispered, inconveniently turning my attention back to herself - and her nearly naked body against mine.

"Shh ... shh …", I hissed between clenched teeth. "Do ... not ... move ...!"

She backed away, of course.

Good. That was perhaps even better.

"Is there anything I can do?", she asked anxiously.

I shook my head tensely and focused my awareness on Charlie's fading thoughts and his diminishing heartbeat, both of which helped my arousal subside.

When I had myself so far under control, I loosened my grip and put the blanket over Bella.

I did not want to expose myself to that tempting sight again immediately.

Only then did I open my eyes and look into her worried face. Still very tense, I put my hand to her cheek.

"Dear, I'm so infinitely sorry!"

"But what is it? What's the matter?"

I sighed, letting too much of the pent-up air out of my lungs, forcing me to take in that sweet seductive blend of scents again to answer her.

But what? Could I trust her with that? What would she think of me?

"I overestimated myself quite a bit ... And suddenly I wanted you so much that I almost couldn't hold back. Please forgive me. That should never have happened!"

Heat poured into the skin under my fingers.

"Um ... I'm sorry too... I should have spoken to you earlier when I felt you weren't quite yourself," she stammered, embarrassed.

"No, Bella. You're really not to blame for the situation. This is entirely my ..."

She shook her flowing mane vehemently and wanted to contradict me.

So typical. She always had to take the blame for everything. So gladly I would have closed her mouth with a kiss, but I still had difficulty, if only not to let my arm tremble.

"Believe me! I still knew very well what I was doing."

She frowned in surprise, and I could almost see her synapses linking.

I already armed myself inwardly.

Would it be so bad? After all, she had already tasted me - even if her reaction had been somewhat different. How would that change with the transformation?

"Then what was the trigger?" The expected inquisition began and, still struggling with myself, I tightened my mouth.

Watching me closely came the next blow – only just missed.

"Did you smell your fingers!?"

Weighing it up, I tilted my head to the side and moistened my lips, lost in thought.

That was only half the truth.

But suddenly her eyes widened, darting up from my silent but obviously betraying enough mouth to capture my gaze.

The knowledge and disbelief could be clearly read in theirs.

"You ... licked them!" My facial expression seemed to be confirmation enough for her, because suddenly she pulled the blanket over her head and reacted off with a groan: "Oh no! ... Oh God ... Ahh ...!"

She was embarrassed again.

Somewhat uncomprehending, I closed my eyelids to collect myself.

If anyone had reason to be ashamed, it was me.

"Bella!" I began, with the intention of appeasing her.

But just as abruptly as she had disappeared, she reappeared.

"Why?" she surprised me with narrowed eyes.

Why? I had not expected this question at all.

"Um ... Well, in the end ... Finally … I guess it was just ... plain and simple ... curiosity?!"

"Oh ..." she breathed, leaving her mouth so delightfully open that I had to look away. "... Hmm ... I can kind of ... understand that ...", she mumbled to herself.

And the image of how she had lifted her stained hand in the car came to my mind.

But she addressed herself directly to me again, "And?"

And what? Did she now want to know how it had tasted?

My mind raced and I cleared my throat first to stall for time.

"It ... pretty much threw me off ... Oh God, I'm so insanely sorry, Bella! I wanted to ... give you so much today, spoil you, return the favor, and now? Look at me ... I can't even touch you properly anymore without fear of losing control ..."

"That bad?" she whispered. "Can't I do anything?"

Carefully, she raised her hand and was about to place it on my chest until she noticed me baring my teeth and clenching them tightly.

Somewhat panicked, my gaze flickered to the window.

"Maybe it would be better if I briefly ..."

"No!" she interrupted me firmly, but thankfully withdrew her fingers. "You're not going now ... and leave me sitting here like this."

"It would only be for half an hour ... Until I've calmed down and then I'll be back here!", I almost begged.

How could I do this to her if she refused?

"Calm down ...?", she murmured thoughtfully and pushed out the tip of her wet, shiny tongue.

Oh no! I had seen that expression before today.

"I'd really rather not be too close to you in this state," I tried to convince her one more time.

Her eyes wandered down me and lingered on the overly obvious bulge in my crotch.

What an ordeal.

I slapped my hands in front of my face and then clawed at my hair - probably making some of them jump around.

I knew what was coming now and began precautionary shaking my head in the desperate hope that I would possibly achieve something with it after all.

"But I could ... give you ... I mean ...", she stuttered and only then looked up at me again. "Why not?!", was the prompt indignant protest.

"Bella, today it's your turn ... And I really don't know how ...!"

"Oh nonsense! We've done that enough times now. You've shown me how you like it best ... and you've always come through it great the last few times ... And enjoyed it too, didn't you?"

"Yes, I do, but today ..."

"You just don't touch me until you ... um ... get unloaded and then ... we'll see how you control yourself."

"Oh Bella ..."

"Please, Edward. Why don't you let me help you where I can! You'll feel a lot better afterwards knowing that you ... that we did this together ... That we were able to handle this, and you didn't run away!"

She was most likely right about that ... If ...

I bit my lip on the inside.

It could work, provided I kept absolutely quiet, didn't touch her, and concentrated solely on releasing the pent-up energy through it ...

"Oh come on ...", Bella begged in a sugary voice, adorable pout and batting-eyelashes angelic eyes.

Then she now nevertheless bedded her forearm on my chest, which made me suck in the air sharply.

That she had not had enough of it after the week, surprised me a bit ... And flattered me of course. After all, it was associated with effort and therefore certainly not the purest pleasure.

"Fine, but no surprises or experiments!"

"OKAY."

Immediately fire and flame she straightened up a bit, the blanket slid down and I closed my eyes, gasping.

"And when I tell you, you stop immediately and back away, understand?!", I instructed her, while I banished my hands back into the only safe position from before ...

And she eagerly pulled the disturbing fabric from my body.

I put one leg up and pulled the other slightly to give her optimal access and then not have to move. She took the knee right away between her hot thighs and thus caused me to gnash my teeth.

As quickly as I could, I gathered my attention, sorted out my perceptions, shut out as much as possible and tried to direct the drive-driven desire to Bella's touch in a controlled manner. I focused solely on her fingers, which approached their goal agonizingly slowly along my thigh. For once, I would have preferred today if she had simply moved as quickly as possible to the action.

She stroked my length, stimulated tickling my testicles, as she had learned to do in the short time. But then her movements drifted deeper than before ...

What was she up to now? I knew that there were also quite a few heterosexual men who were quite turned on by being anally stimulated, but I was - as far as I knew - not one of them and certainly didn't have the nerve to find out now.

A dark growl was all I could produce, making me wonder how I was supposed to give her any other instructions to stop.

Why did she have to go astray now and disturb my shaky concentration?

However, it had the effect of making the animal in me clench its butt in a shudder - which in reality I couldn't simply imitate and possibly crush her finger in the process. Thank God she had understood or postponed her exploration of her own accord, in any case she returned and embraced my raised erection. She began to advance me rhythmically, increasing the tempo as she knew I liked by now, tenderly caressing my quivering tip and with the memory of her hot wet lips around it I released all the demanding emotions and unloaded them onto my belly. I was so careful not to make a sound, not to move, that all the energies were directed to that single point ... The explosion was so powerful that I felt like I was going to burst into a million pieces. In fact, I saw glaring sparks dancing in front of my closed eyes.

When the things had calmed dawn halfway and I dared to stir a little again - even if it was only to take a breath - I noticed how my body vibrated and tingled, how a shallow burning sensation flowed through my limbs and vaguely reminded me of a state of exhaustion.

It was incredible ... Never before had I had such an intense pleasant sensation. I was completely relaxed.


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