A/N: ...Forgive me? XOXO


"Hey, Akari. It's me, Owen. I woke up this morning and man...I remember everything. Babe, I'm so sorry. You have no idea how sorry I am. I came by as soon as I woke up, but you must've been asleep so I wrote this and put it in your mailbox. I know you don't want to see me. I wouldn't. But in case you change your mind, please meet me on the dock by the Fishery at noon. We need to talk. I love you."

"No," Akari groaned as she smothered her pillow over her face. She wiped the sweat from her forehead and as an afterthought, she kicked the heavy quilt from her body and watched it crumple to the floor. She had baked herself dry throughout the night wrapped in that quilt, but she felt exposed and vulnerable without it. She brought the letter up towards the ceiling and reread it. He wrote it in glossy blue ink, probably using a pen of his cousin Chloe's. The words were large, choppy and written in "cursive". She used to laugh at his failed attempts to write in cursive. They were regular letters with his signature loops and squiggles in the wrong places.

This guy was slyest smooth talker she had ever met, she was certain of it. Or at least she wanted to believe that. She felt pathetic for even considering the thought that he may have been truly sincere this time. How much longer was she going to rationalize his behavior? She balled the letter in her fist and tossed it her pile of clothes in the middle of the floor. Yes, that's where he and his words belonged: in dirty laundry.

She kicked her legs off the bed and let them dangle there for awhile as she listened to the short, static beeps from her phone. Kathy left her three messages last night, one every hour. She remembered how she left her best friend standing there in the rain as she walked back to the farm. Akari slumped forward and groaned again. If she had a dollar to pay for every memory she wanted to erase, she'd be in serious debt for the rest of her life. She made a mental note to go by the bar later to apologize...and then she would tell Kathy everything. She stood abruptly and walked over to her full length mirror. Drool marks dried onto the creases of her lips, and imprints from the pillow made an intricate design across her forehead. The bruise on her cheek glared like a red traffic light. She thought she had covered it well last night until Chase said:

"I know you don't know how to cook, but I thought it was common sense to keep your face away from hot stoves."

And then she slammed the door in his face.

She thought she had underestimated the chef, but in the end he always managed to irritate her. His personality was downright smothering. You dislike him, you start to like him just a little bit, and then he does something to make you not like him again. She shrugged it off. He was certainly the least of her problems.

She went into the bathroom and scrubbed her face clean with scalding water. It stung her cheek, and she could feel it pulsating. Once the swelling went down, she coated her face with primer and foundation. She hated wearing make-up. It made her face feel heavy, and she usually sweated it all off while working on the farm anyway. But, she thought, a girl's gotta what a girl's gotta do. As she wrapped her short hair into a small nub at the top of her head, she felt determined. She was going to meet Owen on the pier and finally give him what he deserved. She thought about slapping him, but it would be equivalent to trying to karate chop a brick with her hand. She thought about cussing him out, but she was certain her very tame vocabulary was unimpressive compared to his. So what exactly was she going to do?

"Whatever. I'll figure that out when I get there."

She put on a pair of running shorts and her dad's old college t-shirt and went to tend to her garden. It took several months of trial and error but her vegetables and fruits were finally thriving. She touched the supple, green leaves and inhaled the fresh scent of budding flowers. Since it was only 10:00 a.m. and the summer heat was already assaulting her pale skin, she decided to drown them in water. After an hour of this, she ushered Scarlett and Bella out of the barn to graze. She sat with them under the shade of her cherry tree while chugging down dirty water from her watering can and checking her watch every minute, expecting it to be noon every time she looked at it.

"I'm so not waiting for this," she complained. She saddled Scarlett and heaved herself up on her back. As Akari guided the horse down the dirt road to the city, she became aware of several tragic things.

She didn't shave her legs. Or her arms. She lifted her arm and checked her pit. White with deodorant but hairless. She didn't check to see if her teeth were okay. She raked her tongue around her teeth, and they felt a bit gritty. In fact, she didn't remember if she even brushed them. Her shorts were wrinkled and baggy, and her shirt had two marble sized grease stains near her belly button and collar bone. She didn't understand why these facts were so upsetting to her until she realized who she was going to see...

Owen.

She thought about turning back, but she refused to let him have power over her wardrobe too. After all, this was the last day she was going to see him...intentionally.

From a distance, she could already to see him on the dock with his back facing her. Her heart sped up. She bit her lip, quickly realizing her need for chap-stick. She tied Scarlett to the front of the bar. Mayor Hamilton had already given Akari permission to let her animals roam the city, but she wasn't too fond of the townspeople complaining about stepping on horse crap. At least if Scarlett needed to take a dump by the bar, she would know where to find it. The ocean lay motionless and glittered in the sunlight. She saw Paolo and Toby fishing by the lighthouse with a picnic basket and a large umbrella in between them. She stepped onto the pier and the boards squeaked under her weight. Owen quickly turned around.

His lips curled into sad smile at the sight of her. He stood up and wrapped his arms around her small frame and pulled her into his chest. She, of course, didn't return the hug. She let her arms hang stiffly by her sides as she waited for the hug to end. He didn't reek of alcohol at all. In fact, he smelled good, like trees and pine-cones. He stepped away and took a few strands of her hair that didn't make it into her bun and twirled them around slowly. He was cleanly shaven, and he was wearing black trousers and a white button up shirt, buttoned just enough to see the defined features of his chest. She had rarely seen him look so...nice.

He's good, she tried to convince herself. Very sly, but I'm not gullible.

"Tell me why I'm here or I'm leaving," she demanded.

"Akari, I was out of line..."

"Obviously," she spat.

"I don't even know what to say to make you forgive me. I know "I'm sorry" isn't enough, but I am. I don't want you to leave Akari. I..." He reached out with his fingers to stroke her cheek. She flinched.

"Where is it? Did it heal already?"

"No, I have on make-up," she mumbled. Stupid. "It's still there, big and ugly."

"Akari..."

"I know. You're sorry. I got it."

He looked defeated. He pulled his hand away from her face, almost out of embarrassment, and took a step back. Akari was enjoying that look. He was probably surprised by her gutsiness. She had never been so blunt.

"I'll never get that drunk around you again, Akari. This time I swear. Every time I do something stupid to you, I can't stand to deal with myself the next day. Every time I wonder whether or not you'll take me back. You have...but even someone as sweet as you has a breaking point. I think I finally reached it. I've really screwed up this time. I'm sorry."

She shrugged, but she felt hot tears dribble lamely down her face. "You're an alcoholic," she choked out.

His eyes widened in surprise. "What? I'm not. I just...I need to learn my limits."

"Why don't you just stop period?" She challenged hotly.

"C'mon Akari..."

"I have the right to say this. I'll never trust you again until you give it up for good! It's me or the alcohol!" She was right on the verge of giving in. If he said he would, it was over. She knew she would give up and fall right for him again. She knew she would even though she knew it was stupid.

He hugged her again and kissed the top of her head, running his hands up and down her spine. She still didn't hug him back, but she felt herself relaxing this time. He always knew how to diffuse her anger. Or maybe she still loved him. She felt like a boomerang. You can throw me away, but I always end up coming back.

"You know there's no contest there, Akari. I'll stop. I will."

"How can I know?" She sniffed.

"You'll never see me drunk again. I'll ask Kathy and Hayden to keep me accountable...you can even ask them if I ordered anything. I'll throw out the stash I have at home."

"It can't be that easy."

He pulled away slightly and lifted her chin so she could look at his face. She found that she really couldn't tear her eyes away from his. Yeah...he was definitely lookin' good. But more than that, he looked totally sincere, much to her dismay. It would have been so much easier if he didn't fight so hard. He uttered a quiet: "Love makes everything easy."

Or it makes everyone stupid.

She shrugged. "Cheesy...but I know what you mean."

He chuckled. "Akari, you won't regret this. I promise."


A/N: I haven't updated in two years! I hope this is a pretty good comeback. Thank you for reading! Reviews appreciated and welcomed.