Ch 4: The Epilogue

5 YEARS LATER…

It was dark in the room. Loki and Dove had moved into a small two bedroom house. Though it was late and not a light in the house was on, the occupants were not asleep. Loki was over Dove, grunting as she thrusted rapidly with her hips, nails digging until they drew blood into Dove's hips as thighs pulled her tight and close, wrists bound to the headboard above her head as Loki was biting hard marks into the large scar on her neck making her cry out. Loki had the underwear on that held on the false length but her face was scrunched up and she seemed frustrated.

Dove couldn't see it in the dark but she could feel it in the way Loki's body moved, in how Loki was grunting and whimpering with an annoyed tone, how she was slamming harder into Dove than usual and bruising Dove's pelvis harshly, how her teeth were snapping the scar so bitterly it was almost too painful. When Loki pulled away, Dove caught her lip in her teeth and sucked gently on it with a deep long moan trying to entice her but it wasn't working. This wasn't new. Lately Loki had gotten this way every time and it was taking her much longer to finish, never wanting to cum more then once either and only ever wanting to have sex anymore in the dark with the added length.

Dove had suspicions but she wasn't fully sure what was going on and Loki seemed fine otherwise. When Loki got more frantic and it became clear she couldn't catch the release she was chasing, she ripped away from Dove, frustrated and growling. Dove could make out her silhouette in the dim moonlight sitting at the edge of the bed. She quickly squirmed her fingers and wrists, snagging the emergency releases and pulling her raw wrists free. Over the years it had been a necessity to get some she could get herself out of for one reason or another in their adventurous busy lives but tonight she had never been more thankful as she tucked hair behind her ear and scooted closer, "Loki? Baby everything ok?"

Now that she was next to Loki, she could hear the light agitated sobs and see how Loki was slumped in on herself, death gripping her knees and trembling. She didn't waste any time, moving swiftly to slide herself onto Loki's lap and gently pull Loki's face into her hands, thumbs wiping wet hot tears away, "Baby… what's wrong?"

Loki choked on her whimpers, hands moving to hang limp at her sides, "I… I can't… I'm really trying but nothing is working…"

Dove leaned and gently kissed wet cheeks, brushing sweaty strands of hairs from Loki's face. A glance at the time showed Loki had indeed been trying hard for a few hours now with nothing to show for it but pent up irritation and need. Dove had finished a few times but it wasn't satisfying without Loki so she would go as long as it took and that;'s how they had ended up here. She leaned her forehead against Loki's and let her thumbs continue to stroke at Loki's face softly, "Tell me what's been bothering you Baby. I know it's been bugging you for weeks now. Please talk to me."

Loki was still sniffling and whimpering. Dove could feel every inch of Loki shaking under her. It was the only noise for a while before the most desperate, defeated voice spoke. It didn't even sound like Loki to Dove, "I need it to be real. My head has been a mess. I can't do it anymore Babe. I'm so sorry. Lately, I just… not wearing it is fucking with my head… wearing it makes me feel like I'm some broken bastard… I can't anymore… I'm still me… still both… but that area just… doesn't feel right anymore… hasn't for a while now but I can't do it anymore…"

Loki started to sob again. Dove felt her heart break. She had not realized it was about this. Well she suspected but didn't think this was quite the issue or to this extent. She also felt so hurt that Loki thought she had to hide this or that she had to try to force herself to be something that didn't feel right for her sake. She reached, fumbling at the nightstand until she turned on the lap, turning back to her wife, "Loki baby look at me."

Loki's eyes opened weakly, heavy with tears and guilt and shame and Dove felt her heart lurch, "Baby… I'm so sorry you didn't think you could say anything. I'm so, so fucking sorry you thought you had to hide this or be untrue to yourself. Baby I'm going to love you no matter what. It'll be an adjustment for sure but if it is what you need to feel like you are your true self, I wouldn't have it any other way. I will learn and be happy just being with you and seeing you being the same confident, energetic smiling woman I fell in love with. If that means you have a dick now, so be it."

Loki choked on her tears and her arms reached to pull Dove close against herself, burying her face into Dove's bare chest and just crying, shoulders shaking as Dove looped her arms tenderly around them and rested her face in Loki's hair, gently letting out soothing sounds to help Loki relax. When Loki finally calmed enough, they were both acutely aware of their exhaustion. Dove tucked Loki in her arms as they laid in bed, being sure to see her hurting wife.

—-

The entire process was long and arduous and things at home sometimes got frustrating to say the least. Loki had no intentions of any other changes, didn't want any hormones or changes in pronouns so at least there weren't any major life adjustments but tensions were high. Their sex life pretty much stopped existing for the most part. Or rather stopped as it was. Loki had been good about caring for Dove's needs if they arose but she herself didn't have it anymore for now and some nights things like Loki's fingers and mouth were just not enough. Toys weren't either nor sweet torment.

Dove was understanding but it was just difficult going from a very active, fairly healthy sex life to a lack of skin to skin contact with her partner that she adored. They were doing their best. It didn't cause any serious issues but Dove had slipped back into some habits of her sharper tongue and strong glares due to her frustrations. It took an entire year to get everything done.

Loki had decided, since Dove wanted her to choose what she needed regardless of cost, to work with some genetics doctors who could actually do genetic biological grafting and growth and she would have something as natural as if she had been born with it. Their technology could even apply the right push to her genetics to drop her ovaries into testes and they could get rid of anything else she didn't want. Nerve endings could also be rewired, for lack of a better phrase. After all the procedure, there was healing.

Dove leaned back in her chair rubbing her face, exhausted from all her pent up well everything. She was waiting for Loki to return from her last visit with the doctor. Whatever it was now was what it was going to be. Because of what Loki chose, length and girth would all be determined by whatever she might have had if she were born male in the first place so there was some curiosity there. She just hoped it wouldn't be anything crazy. She was sure that would be a lot to get used to though right now she would take anything if it meant she could feel Loki actually against her.

She stared out the window by her desk and leaned into her hand, not realizing she had fallen asleep until she was waking up to hands massaging down into her shoulders, "mmm… hey Baby. How'd it go?"

Loki leaned down, kissing her head but it was different then unusual. It was hungry. Soon, Dove found herself being swept up into Loki's arms, staring into two pink orbs blown out with desire, "It was fine I don't want to talk about that. I need you."

Dove whined, clinging to Loki's shoulders and wrapping her legs around Loki's waist in those strong arms, "fuck… I've wanted to hear you say that for so long…"

Loki bit her lip hard, "Shut up… need you right now…"

Dove nodded and their lips met hard, her hips grinding into Loki's with need. She gasps, feeling Loki's muscles strain under her fingertips as the unfamiliar bulge made itself known. She could feel her face grow hot and flush, grinding along the prominent growing length and realizing it was thicker than the toy they used, even if not by much, and seemed a bit longer, not that the toy was huge but it wasn't tiny and Dove wasn't prepared for this surprise. Loki's body quivered and her knees shook some, the new sensation overwhelming already and she reached, grasping Dove's hips hard, "Stop that!"

Dove whined but obeyed, absolutely weak to Loki's forceful nature. She kissed and nipped at Loki's neck, pressed against her but resisting the urge to move her hips as Loki carried her to the nearby couch, the bed too far and up the stairs. Loki wasn't sure her legs would allow her that far. She sat into the cushioned surface with Dove in her lap, nails grasping her hips harshly and holding the woman still as Dove tried to coax Loki at her neck, "Please baby. I've been waiting for you. I miss you against me."

Loki groaned, hips jerking subconsciously and she shivered, "S…so sensitive… I… unf…"

"N…no…Loki wait… please… no!" Dove was begging, not wanting Loki to cum yet.

No, she needed Loki against her first desperately. Quickly she was tugging at her clothing, ripping free of her shirt and bra as she kissed at Loki's lips and face pleading, "Baby please wait… please please please…"

Loki bit her lip and her eyes scrunched closed as she nodded weakly, hands trying to help Dove strip as fast as she could before helping Dove to get herself undressed. When Loki was down to her underwear Dove gasped at the sizable tent. She wanted to grasp it but was scared if she did, Loki might burst. Instead, she gripped the waistband and leaned to Loki's lips, whispering against them, "Baby… try to calm down for me. Don't you want your first time to be somewhere special with me?"

She felt Loki's sharp inhale and the way Loki's muscles rippled and clenched all over but Loki was forcing herself to breathe in and out in a calmer pattern and Dove could only smile, sliding the underwear from Loki's body. The solid length pulled with it at first but once freed it popped back and stood straining and twitching, a strong throb occasionally running through it. The tip was glistening with a run of precum and Dove could only stare with wide eyes at it. She had never been this close to a real one before.

There was Fern but that was behind herself. She never saw Fern until it was over and the woman was getting dressed across the room and flaccid. This was the first time she had not only been so close to a real cock but the first time ever that she had seen one erect before. She bit her lip. On Loki, she was so very tempted to explore what all she was comfortable with and curious about but the way the woman was straining to hold back and whimpering Dove knew it had to wait for another day. Right now, Loki needed release and honestly Dove didn't want to wait any longer to feel Loki fuck her than she already had. A year was already much too long in her opinion.

She slid back onto Loki's lap, her thighs slotting around Loki's body as her hands gripped the back of the couch and she leaned in and kissed Loki deeply, rolling her hips so the length slid along her slit and the swollen head bumped against her clit, causing them both to groan into each other's lips. It had the desired effect as Loki grasped her with lustful hands and yanked her close, bodies pressing together as the tip slipped between her petaling lower lips and pressed into her eager opening. Loki didn't wait for any further encouragements, couldn't wait, pressing Dove down hard onto herself until she buried fully, letting out a yelp of surprise at the overwhelming sensations as Dove moaned loudly, inner walls clenching and releasing rapidly around her trying to adjust, "f…fuck! Babe I…I can't!"

Soft hands stroked Loki's jaw and she opened her eyes to look at the pure desire in Dove's, "It's ok. do it. Take me god please!"

It was all Loki needed to hear as she grasped Dove tight and bounced her along the straining throbbing length, hips pounding up into each motion. Dove unraveled quickly. It was a pleasingly painful stretch and deep feeling and the feeling of Loki's chest against hers was so welcome and missed she arched into Loki, quickly becoming a mess in her wife's fingers, nails scratching at the couch fabric for something to hold onto as her mind fizzled out and she fell forward, clenching tight inside down on Loki as she came. The grip made thrusting almost unbearably tight and Loki couldn't take it, overwhelmed by all the new sensations and the stimulus to her brain she had been needing, pressing in as far as she could and hunting out Dove's lips with her own as her length shook with it's release deep inside Dove.

It was hot and sudden and Dove gasped against Loki's lips, eyes wide and cheeks red. She had forgotten in the moment that this was going to be different then before and she was going to feel this sensation fully this time. It was foreign and odd but she didn't think she hated it. In fact, she was pretty sure the idea of it being Loki doing it excited every fiber of her being and she shuddered all over in response. When they came back down she refused to release Loki's shoulders, not wanting to move or lose the feeling of Loki's skin on hers after so long.

—-

For several weeks as they learned the ins and outs of what they did and didn't like about Loki's new appendage, they stayed cooped up in their home and had no contact with the outside world. Sex was happening so often Dove was arguing to fit showers in somewhere half the time. Eventually, things were getting back to the way they had always been. Still quite active but not like they were some sort of animals.

Snuggled up for a movie, Dove had been noticing some things lately that had her a bit concerned but she didn't want to say anything until she was sure she wasn't just paranoid. After all it didn't even seem logical really and at no point had they been told otherwise. In the morning, when Loki left to take Reaper and Ragnarok for some upgrade servicing and recertifications, Dove watched her leave from her desk, peering at the door until it closed. The moment she was sure she was officially alone, she flew to her computer and pulled up the doctor's number, calling up the man who did all Loki's medical work.

When he answered, Dove was nibbling her lip, "Well Mrs. I didn't expect to get a call. Did something happen?"

She gave a polite smile, "Oh no. Well, yes but nothing like that. Doctor I was wondering. Loki's not doing the hormone portion of the program so she should be sterile, correct?"

He hummed for a moment and then flipped through some folders before Dove heard papers fluttering. She didn't like that he had to check. In truth, Dove and Loki hadn't exactly discussed things like kids or anything even now six years into their marriage. She wasn't even sure she wanted a family. It was never really something she had even put much thought into. Now she wished she would have thought about it more to have at least had the forethought to ask during the process and figure that all out right then. When he looked back up, he was smiling, "Oh well actually, seems she's more than capable of conception. Not every subject needs to be in that program. While it's extremely rare, some people's bodies take to the components and biological enhancements and automatically begin to alter in response due to the genetic alterations. Mrs. Valkyrie is one of those people."

Dove felt her heart drop into her stomach and suddenly it was hard to breathe. She struggled to end the call and just sat there, staring blankly. She didn't hate kids. Did she want kids? Was she still being paranoid though? Ok her period was several weeks late at this point and she could no longer rationalize that it was just being off sync. She rubbed her face and scrambled for her keys.

The drug store in a town where people know you is always uncomfortable for stuff like this. She imagined it might be for buying condoms too. On that thought, she thought maybe grabbing those might not hurt either. Anytime anyone who might recognize her passed she ducted into herself, hiding a bit. She was holding a pregnancy test and a box of condoms. At her age that shouldn't be embarrassing but she was never really one to like people in her business.

Purchase felt just as unbearable with the lines and the talkative cashier but she was extremely grateful when it was over and she was home again and Loki was still out. She tossed the box in their nightstand, grumbling to herself, "Her ass will be using these if this test is negative for a while until we seriously talk about this stuff."

Though Dove knew she was just as guilty these days of enjoying the feeling inside as Loki was, knowing she was fussing herself as much as she was standing her ground. As she sat in their bathroom and waited she stared at her mother's contact. She had let her mother know in the past year about some of what was going on and after her wedding fiasco a lot of that was cleared up years ago though Winter still wasn't a fan of Loki's, she was civil and at least respected that Dove loved the woman. That was good enough for Dove. Her head hung and she groaned.

Before she could contemplate the moral dilemma of if it was wrong to tell Winter before Loki or not, the timer went off and she took a deep breath, eyes scrunched as she grabbed it, slowly peeking at the object.

—-

When Loki got home, she was exhausted. The center had been packed and the people had been annoying and all she wanted to do was see her wife. She set the weapons against the wall by the door and glanced around, not seeing Dove anywhere. It was late so she figured Dove went to bed already. With a smirk she ran up the stairs, body hungry for a way to get out the frustrations of dealing with people.

Sure enough, Dove was there, sitting there on her scroll nibbling her lip in lost concentration. Loki always loved the way Dove nibbled her lip. She quickly threw off her shirt and approached, slipping from her pants and sliding in, grabbing Dove at the legs and yanking suddenly causing Dove to yelp and fall back, Lioki leaning over her and watching her shudder. Teeth nipped at her neck scar and Dove squirmed, "Mmmm God I missed ya today Babe. Ugh I am desperate for something to sink my teeth and nails into."

As Loki said this, her nails dragged painfully along Dove's sides and her teeth bit harder, making the woman groan and her thighs tremble between Loki's knees. It made Loki's length stiffen and twitch but as she bit and scratched at Dove, a hand pressed on her collarbone, "L…fuckkkk… Loki w-wait. Loki!"

Loki pulled back some, staring down at Dove panting lightly and trying to gather herself, "Yea?"

Dove reached and rubbed her face, "I… we should really talk."

Brows furrowed as Loki watched her, "Bout what Babe?"

The woman beneath her bit her lip nervously and stared into Loki's eyes, "God I don't really… I don't know how to tell you this so I'll just say it…Loki… Loki I'm pregnant…"

The silence was so thick it could be choked on between them as Loki stared down at her. When she got her surgery she was informed she'd have to be on hormones for this to really be an option so her brain was running a mile a minute trying to piece it all together. Dove was watching her growing more and more anxious and uncertain. She was still not really sure how she felt about it all herself but in her need to just rip off the bandaid she just didn't want bloodshed, so to speak.

Before Loki could really think about how the words might sound or come across, they came out of her mouth and she frowned, "Have… you… been seeing someone else?"

Loki had never regretted not thinking before speaking first so faster in her life then she did in this moment. Dove's fast instantly twisted with hurt and anger and she jerked herself out from under Loki, shoving the woman hard in the process, "How fucking dare you! After everything we have been through you just… UGH! Fuck you Loki!"

Loki sat up, stammering, "B-but… I don't… you'd have to be right!?"

"NO LOKI! I called your fucking doctor!" Dove shouted, getting out of the bed and leaning to rip her duffle out from under it, going to the closet, "And he said, it's super rare but you are one of a few people who can without the hormones! It's your baby! Huh, imagine fucking that!"

"W...wait Babe where are you going?" Loki asked, watching Dove shove some clothing into a duffle angrily before storming from the closet.

"I'm going to my mothers!" Dove shouted, her glare burning holes into Loki so intensely Loki physically flinched.

"W...what?! Why?! Wait no don't... don't do that! Please not your mom." Loki begged, trying to catch up with her wife as she left down the stairs.

Dove turned around sharply, finger jabbing into Loki's chest, "You accused me of cheating on you!"

Loki gave a pitiful look, "That's… that's not fair! I was told I couldn't do this without the hormones! What was I supposed to think!"

Dove grit her teeth, "You could have just asked me how and I would have told you I called him! Or mentioned what you were told dammit! You didn't have to immediately jump to thinking I was fucking some guy! As if!"

Loki faltered and Dove let out an angry sound, "I'm going! Maybe I'll call you tomorrow!"

Before she could stop her, Dove was gone. Loki growled and rubbed her face, "Idiot!"

Dove got on the next ship out, speeds having advanced over the years, hugging her knees and messaging Winter she was on her way. She was kicking herself for not grabbing the plush on her way out, knowing it would soothe her nerves. In hours she was at the station and in no time she was on her mother's doorstep. When Winter opened the door, Dove flew into her embrace, "Mom…"

They got inside over tea and Winter listened to her daughter explain everything before she frowned, reaching over to grasp Dove's hand. In moments, Dove's face sunk into her arms, "What… Mom, I don't even know what to do… like… obviously I'm going to keep it. The thought of not doing so makes me think about how you didn't do that to me and I just can't but… how could she just think that? I don't even like men! I'm not… she's my everything I would never…"

Winter moved to rub Dove's back, "Did she seem angry at you?"

Dove's head shook no and Winter leaned and kissed it, "I think she just didn't know what else to say. Maybe you surprised her. It sounds like she never thought that would be something she would hear. I'm not saying what she said was acceptable but people panic sometimes in shock. Maybe stay here and cool down and then give her a call dear?"

Dove just whimpered and Winter stayed with her. It wasn't but a few hours later and there was a knock at the door. Dove looked confused at Winter, "Expecting anyone Mom?"

Winter shook her head and moved to the door, opening it. Her face tightened into a frown as there on her doorstep was Loki, "Um… hi. Is Dove here yet?"

Dove could hear Loki's voice and stiffened. Winter glanced back before turning with that icy glare back at Loki, "Yes of course. Why?"

"I need ta talk to her," Loki said simply.

"No!" came a call from the kitchen.

Winter folded her arms, "Well, doesn't seem like she needs to talk to you."

Loki frowned, trying to look past Winter, "Dove! Hear me out yea?"

Dove slipped from the chair and frowned, "I said no!"

Loki took a side step but Winter blocked her each time. Frustrated, she grunted and reached out, shoving Winter out of her way, or trying to as Winter grasped hold of her with a surprising amount of power and a glyph pinned Loki in place squirming and shouting, "Babe! I'm sorry! I… I was stupid! Please! Come on! Call off your damn mom! Talk to me!"

When she got no response, Loki summoned an immense amount of will and strength and ripped herself along the glyph, glaring at Winter and imposing her own semblance, Winter's head swimming with negativities long enough for the glyph to weakening for a second but it was all that Loki needed to get free. She pulled from it and took off after Dove before Winter could catch her, those blue energy fields around Winter's eyes telling Loki she was running on seconds before the Winter Maiden power was unleashed on her.

She found Dove just outside her old room, catching her before she could enter, grabbing her and pinning her to the wall, "Listen to me! I'm so sorry! I know you would never do that! I trust you so much! I was just being stupid and nothing made sense at the moment! I didn't mean to hurt you! I made you a vow Babe. I'm never leaving."

She reached into her vest and pulled out Mr. Feathers, handing him over to Dove as she let her go, "I noticed you forgot this too. I know you will need him right now. I knew more than anything how upset you were when I saw you forgot him. Stay here for a bit if you need to but I'm gonna come here every damn day and try to see ya because I am not leaving you and I meant it. Especially not now."

Winter had caught up and Loki was swept up in a whirl of cold air as Dove was staring at Mr. Feathers and holding him close. It was cold and painful on Loki's skin and she squirmed. Her whimpers drew Dove's attention and she reached out before Winter could toss Loki down the stairs towards the door, "Mom no it's fine! Let her go."

Winter set Loki down beside herself and as Loki let out a relieved sigh, the older woman frowned, "I still don't like you. Consider that your only warning."

Loki felt pale but Dove reached out and grabbed her wrist, pulling her over, opening her old room door, "Mom can we get a ride to the station after some rest?"

Winter gave a nod and Loki and Dove climbed into her old bed, exhausted and in need of sleep as the morning was approaching. Loki held Dove close, fingers stroking through her hair, "What do you wanna do Babe?"

Dove was staring at the plush tucked into her chest, "Loki… do you even want kids? We've never talked about it."

"Sure. But only if you do. If not I figured we could get a cat or somethin one day," she softly chuckled.

Dove rolled her eyes but it was a relief to know that, "I want to keep it…"

The shifting next to her made her nervous briefly until she was rolled on top of Loki in a warm embrace and could see the biggest smile on Loki's face, "I'm so happy you said that Babe I just didn't want ya to decide because of me. It's your body."

Dove leaned her head close and kissed Loki. She still felt like she didn't know about kids but she was overflowing with Loki's joy and could feel her own growing. Maybe one would be wonderful. The idea of a family with this woman was also an idea that made her heart swell the more she thought about it.

—-

Time passed, Loki and Ren personally built beautiful furniture for the baby in the spare room. Dove stopped working for now. Finding out it was a boy was a wild day. His first kicking was even worse and Dove was certain now the chaos energy was genetic and she would never escape. When her belly was big enough every night Loki rubbed it and talked to their son and it made Dove smile. As she drew closer to her due date, Loki helped with any and all her sore muscles each evening, a blessing in disguise really for her bore body.

They were relaxing on the couch as Loki helped with her feet, "Have you decided on a name yet Babe?"

She swooned lightly as relief swept through her as Loki worked her sore feet, smiling over at her, "I have."

Loki's pure excitement was contagious, making her heart race, "Oh yea? Well out with it I wanna hear it!"

Dove snickered lightly, hand tracing her swell of a belly, staring lovingly at it, "I want to name him Odin."

Pressure disappeared and she glanced up in time to see Loki right before the woman kissed her sweetly with such loving lips, "I love it."