And love
Chap 42 Pass the Peace pipe
A/N: I am using some family names in the story at this point. If this makes anyone uncomfortable, just skip to the story below. My uncle Palmer was my dad's youngest brother. He passed away when I was 6-8 y/o, of Multiple Sclerosis (MS). His wife, my aunt Deborah, lived a full life and did bake the most delicious home-made rolls. Their son Carroll owned a large peach orchard on the western slopes of Colorado. He passed away recently of Covid-19 complications. Carroll's son Tim was killed in a tragic Bobcat accident; just as he was entering the prime of life. Carroll's wife will appear in the story; her name will be a pseudonym as she is still with us. This is, in part, in memorial to part of my family. Saddle Rock Ranch is not connected in any way to myself or anyone named herein.
J/E APARTMENT
Bedtime
Eddie and Jamie are tucking the girls in.
"Daddy, I really liked Joseph, when can we go again?" Mary Rose requests.
"Well, we are thinking once a month, sweetie."
"Daddy!" All the girls complain.
Eddie smirks, she supports more often trips to Saddle Rock Ranch. She looks at Jamie, a pleading look on her face.
Realizing he is alone and out-voted, he acquiesces. "Ok, I will call and see if we can schedule a lesson every 2 weeks. Will that be all right?"
"YES, thank you daddy," all 3 of his girls exclaim.
Eddie smiles; he will get her answer later.
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SAME PLACE, THE NEXT EVENING
Eddie and Jamie have gathered family for dinner and a talk. Present are:
Jamie, Eddie & their 3 daughters.
Paula & Joe Hill.
Linda Reagan.
Nicky Reagan-Boyle.
Eddie had discussed with Linda the wisdom of including Jack & Sean. They had gone back and forth; they ended up not including them, but Linda was free to discuss things with them later.
After a buffet supper; provided by the ladies, they all gathered in the living room.
"I think we all know why we are gathered here," Jamie opens with.
"YES, you all are allowing my mother to scare you away from family dinners!" Nicky glares at the group. She continues, "Why do you do that?"
'I knew there was a reason we invited her' both Jamie and Eddie are thinking.
"Wait just a damn minute! It's complicated," Joe sputters.
"Only if you make it so," Nicky retorts.
Cassie, Mal and Mary Rose are listening and looking around – wide eyed. Eddie had insisted on including them with a purpose. She wanted them to see what she hoped would be a reasonably civil family discussion. She had her fingers crossed so far.
Linda speaks up, "Nicky is partly right. Danny does work with Erin, though he now is focusing on getting back to work."
"And then? I know you and I have talked about this, Lin my friend. Do you think that his argumentative spirit will be softened?" Paula adds.
"I certainly hope so," Linda wishes. "I think the boys and I can encourage him that direction."
"Why aren't they here?" Cassie speaks up.
"I didn't think that they were ready for this talk," Linda admits. "I may have under estimated them."
The 3 girls look at each other; they wish that there were more 'kids' present. They felt kind of alone. Eddie & Jamie sensed that, and wished they had made a different choice.
"I've got an idea, and I know Jamie has one, too." Eddie asserts. Looking around she counts the house. "We are 9 people. Why are we backing down from 1, or 2?"
"Amen," Nicky mutters.
"YES!" The girls speak up.
The adults are surprised at their boldness. Cassie wonders what has gotten into her. Is there something to this Reagan thing?
"What are you saying," Paula muses.
"Well," Eddie starts. "If we all support each other, as we've talked about before. And either ignore or answer in a non-confrontational way any questions or barbs . . . can't we stand together?"
"Maybe, Joe admits." He looks at his mom, expectantly.
"Jamie, why don't you tell us your idea, hon?" Eddie smiles at her husband.
Everyone turns to Jamie. "Paula and Joe, I'm putting on my lawyer's hat here." They nod in understanding.
Cassie leans toward Mal; "Lawyer?" she whispers.
"Yes, later," Mal whispers back.
Mary Rose wishes she had heard what her sis had said. Mal raises a finger to her lips in a shushing motion.
"Go on, please," Paula encourages.
"Can you, Joe and I craft a statement, maybe a letter, giving the family a bare minimum of facts? Trying to stop the questions and accusations?" Jamie looks hopefully at Joe and his mother. "I have drafted an example."
Joe lifts an eyebrow; Paula covers her face with her hands.
"Is it PG," Joe questions, looking around.
"Definitely," Jamie responds.
"Go ahead," Paula whispers. Joe nods in assent. That alone is a giant vote of confidence addressed toward Jamie. Eddie's heart swells with pride.
Jamie pulls out a legal pad and begins:
FROM: Paula Hill
TO: The Reagan family
Joseph Reagan and I were in the NYPD academy together. We noticed an attraction, and began dating. In groups at first, then 1 on 1. After a few dates we had one intimate encounter, only one.
The girls look to each other, big eyes. Eddie grimaces, she and Jamie were nervous about this part. Too late, moving on.
A few weeks later, I found out that I was pregnant. As I thought about the situation, some things were apparent to me. First, while Joe and I were good friends, we were not in love. Second, Joe was such a good person that he would want to be a real father to our child; probably get married. Third, while I would not deny his fatherhood, I was NOT ready for marriage! So, I made some decisions.
I decided not to tell him of the pregnancy, and I decided to drop out of the academy and move home to Rhode Island.
At this point both Eddie and Jamie were sincerely regretting having the girls here. But it was too late. Perhaps they should have read the letter again, and thought about it more? Oh, well, sigh.
Continuing:
I truly didn't mean to hurt Joe; I liked and respected him a lot. I just couldn't see how a relationship would work. And as time went by it became harder and harder to see myself telling him.
"Boy, can I ever relate to that!" Eddie mutters. Several eyes turn to look at her. Jamie smiles at his wife.
Jamie wraps up:
Looking back, I honestly regret getting pregnant and then the decisions I made. But here we are. I hope, above all else, that you don't hold any of this against my Joseph.
Sincerely,
Paula Hill
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Jamie puts down his legal pad and waits.
It seems like everyone is stunned.
"Wow, that's as succinct as it can be, I think." Joe breaths out. He looks to his mom.
"I'm not sure what to say. That is more than I'd like to tell, but what do you leave out?" Paula wonders.
Eddie raises her hand, Jamie nods.
"If Paula is willing, why don't we do what Jamie and I have done. Meet with Frank and Henry alone and get their reaction to the letter, the story?"
"Without party crashers!" Jamie snorts.
"I can keep mom busy," Nicky promises.
"Me and Danny likewise," Linda opines.
All look to Paula, Joe as well.
She lets out a deep sigh. "I'm willing to give it a go. Who will be with me?"
"I'd say myself, Jamie & Eddie," Joe suggests.
Everyone nods. "Anything I should take out of the letter?" Jamie wonders.
"No, leave it as is."
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BAY RIDGE
Pops had offered to do a light supper, Paula and Joe had politely declined. Jamie and Eddie had accepted. After eating and family talk, they waited for their guests. Jamie had deliberately saved the letter for Paula's arrival. He wanted everyone to see the reaction when Frank and Henry read it.
After arrival and greetings, they assembled in the sunroom. Jamie gave all a copy of the letter; Paula and Joe watched intently as the gents read. Both men were trained cops, so thy were able to keep micro expressions to a minimum. Even Joe couldn't tell much. After reading, they set the letters down.
"So, you didn't use protection?" Pops came out with.
Good thing Eddie didn't have any drink in her mouth; she coughed instead. Jamie patted her on the back.
"Excuse me, wrong pipe!" She was flushed.
"No, it wasn't exactly a . . . um, planned part of that evening," Paula admitted. She blushed a little.
Jole was furious, but he kept his cool. 'MY GOD, IS THAT ALL THE OLD MAN CAN COME UP WITH!' Fortunately, he kept his mouth shut. And a straight face.
Jamie was watching him, and was amazed. Had they been alone, he might have let Pops have it.
Frank was more circumspect. "Well, I think from a family perspective we wish that different decisions had been made. But I can see why you were in a quandary, if you didn't see yourself falling in love with Joe."
"I just wasn't sure if that would happen. Sorry to say."
"I think you are correct, Paula; my brother was such a god guy. I'm sure he would have rolled the dice on love and married you, in order to take care of you and his child."
"Thank you, Jamie," Paula looks at him softly.
"You didn't think Joseph would be a good dad?" Henry was incredulous.
Jamie and Eddie were seething. 'What is wrong with Pops?'
"I was sure about Joe. I wasn't sure about myself, or us as a couple."
After a few more minutes, they said good-bye and parted. Jamie and Eddie left with Paula and Joe. At the cars they paused.
Well," Eddie breathed out. "Not what I hoped."
"No," Jamie admitted.
"I don't want to say it," Joe starts. "But I don't think that mom and I joining the larger family will work at this time."
Jamie and Eddie sadly have to agree. That seems to be a bridge too far.
Paula agrees, and is in part relieved. She can get on with firming up her friendships with Liinda, Eddie and Jamie & girls. She does hope doing that doesn't harm the larger family. Joe is right there with her.
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BREAKFAST THE NEXT MORNING
"I feel sorry for Paula," Mal expresses.
"Me too," Cassie & Mary Rose join their sissy.
"Why is that," Jamie quizzes his girls.
"Well, she is alone except for Joe."
"So, that's why we need to step up and be her family. Can you see that?" Eddie inserts.
"Yeah, sort of. What can we do though," Cassie thinks.
"Can we do family dinners here," Mary Rose puts out there.
"Would you like that?" Eddie asks.
"Yes," it is unanimous among the youngsters.
"Mother and I will talk about it," Jamie assures them.
BEDTIME
"I'm still not used to that."
"Want?"
"You calling me mother."
"You are, mother"
"Not here in bed!" She turns to the wall.
"Do you want to be a mother again?"
"Um . . . what would that entail, father?"
He rolls her over – "well, let's see."
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TBC
