"Chandler, can you pass me the syrup?"
Chandler reached across the little table in Monica's kitchen to hand Rachel the bottle. Monica stood by the stove, working on another stack of her incredible blueberry pancakes. All three of them were in their pajamas and bathrobes, and Chandler thought maybe there had never been a better lazy Sunday morning.
Having breakfast at Monica's was nothing new to him, of course, but it was so much better when he got to roll out of Monica's bed instead of his own before making his way to the kitchen. Since their return from London, he had spent every night with her in her comfy floral bedsheets–which he would tell no one he loved. In fact, since his return from London, he had practically been living in Monica and Rachel's apartment, leaving from there in the morning and coming straight back after work without stopping in apartment 19.
This worked out well for him, since it meant he got to avoid Joey. He had barely exchanged two words with his best friend since their fight last week. He figured this would blow over soon, so he had decided to give Joey his space. He slipped back home once or twice a day to grab a change of clothes, maybe take a shower if Monica's was occupied, and he had only encountered Joey a couple times. Unfortunately, Joey really knew how to hold a grudge, and whenever they did cross paths, he would simply pretend Chandler wasn't there. Chandler missed his best friend more than he cared to admit, but in the meantime, he tried to focus on his new relationship with Monica.
"So, I was thinking tonight we could go to that restaurant you were raving about," Chandler said as Monica sat down next to him and started buttering her pancakes. "What was it called… Javu?"
"Oh, I love Javu!" Monica exclaimed.
"Sounds like fun," said Rachel. "I'm in."
"Well that's great, because I hear it's a really romantic place for three people to go together," Chandler said with a pointed look at Rachel.
"Oh, I'm sorry! Was that supposed to be like… a date?" Rachel asked obliviously.
Chandler looked to Monica. This wasn't the first time this had happened. Rachel had been tagging along as a third wheel on nearly all their dates, and while it certainly wasn't Chandler's preference, Monica had persuaded him to allow it.
"She's going through a tough time right now," Monica had said, "what with the whole Ross thing and all. She really needs company and friends."
And so Chandler had agreed. He still got Monica to himself every night when they retired to bed, so he couldn't complain too much.
Now Monica gave him a slight shrug, indicating she was fine with Rachel joining them at Javu.
"Eh, it's fine. You can come with," Chandler told Rachel, leaning back in his chair. "It's not often I get the chance to go on a date with two beautiful women."
Monica looked like she was about to protest his joke, but Rachel beat him to it.
"If it's a date, does that mean you'll be paying for my meal, too?" she asked him with a wry smile.
"Did I say date?" Chandler asked. "I meant dinner. Just regular dinner."
He caught the ghost of an amused smile on Rachel's face as she turned her attention to her magazine. Although this was just playful banter, he probably would offer to cover her meal. As Rachel was quick to remind them, she was still strapped for cash after spontaneously buying a plane ticket to London.
The truth was, while he wished he had more one-on-one time with Monica, he did enjoy spending extra time with Rachel. Maybe she was filling the friendship void that Joey left in his life this week. She was also Chandler and Monica's biggest cheerleader, which he appreciated since they weren't getting much support from their other friends. Joey had made his disapproval very clear, and while Ross didn't know they were officially dating yet, he hadn't taken kindly to the idea of their relationship last week. Phoebe seemed neutral; happy for them, but still miffed at having missed all the excitement in London. They hadn't seen much of her this week anyway. But in the midst of all this, having the approval of Monica's best friend told him that his choice wasn't entirely wrong.
The door swung open, interrupting Chandler's thoughts. To his surprise, Joey stepped inside. He was wearing plaid pajama pants and a white t-shirt.
"I smell pancakes," was all he said by way of greeting.
"Joey," Monica said. "We haven't seen you in a while."
"Yeah, well, I ran out of cereal," he grumbled, helping himself to a plate from the cabinet before piling it high with pancakes. "Someone didn't do the grocery shopping," he said, looking at Chandler.
"Is that someone you?" Chandler asked, not looking up from his breakfast.
"No!" Joey said. "You always do the grocery shopping!"
"Oh, so you're talking to me again now?" Chandler retorted.
Joey pursed his lips together, then looked down at his pancakes. "Damn it," he muttered.
"Oh, come on!" Chandler sat up and leaned toward Joey. "You can't still be mad at me about Mary Angela."
"I'm going to be mad at you about that for the next eight years," Joey said firmly, pointing his fork at Chandler. "But that's not what this is about."
"What's it about, then?" asked Chandler.
"You're messing things up, man!" Joey whined. "You're disrespecting Ross, and what happens when you and Monica break up? If you and Monica are fighting and Ross and Rachel are fighting, the whole group's gonna fall apart!"
Chandler opened his mouth to reply, but Monica beat him to it. "Okay, first of all, what makes you think there's a when we break up?"
"It's Chandler!" Joey told her. "He messes up relationships! That's like… his move!"
"That is not my move!" Chandler protested.
"And second," Monica continued, ignoring the boys' comments, "I don't see why everyone keeps bringing Ross into this. No one cared what I thought when he started dating Rachel."
"It's different for guys," Joey said. "You wouldn't get it."
"That is so sexist," Monica told him.
"Besides," Chandler added, "Ross might change his mind when we tell him that we're in a real relationship, y'know? It's not like we're just messing around. We're going to tell him right when he gets back."
Monica nodded. "His flight got back last night. He should be coming over any minute now."
"Yeah, well, we'll just see what he thinks," Joey grunted.
"You never know," Rachel told him. "Ross might have changed his mind about a lot of things while he was in Greece."
"Honey, please don't get your hopes up," said Monica, rubbing Rachel's arm sympathetically. "I really don't think he'll have changed his mind about something as big as his marriage."
"We'll see," was all Rachel said to that.
Joey leaned back in his chair and groaned. "Everything's changing!" he complained. "Ross is married, Rachel likes Ross again, you know the arguing is going to start up again, and now Monica and Chandler…" He let out a long sigh. "Why can't we just go back to normal?"
"'Normal' being where all six of us are single and alone?" Monica asked.
"Yes!" Joey said. "Exactly! It's simpler that way. Why can't things just stay like that?"
"Well, maybe because some of us are looking for something a little more meaningful than an endless string of hookups," said Monica.
"You mean that's not what we're doing?" said Chandler, feigning shock and earning a smile from Monica.
"Endless hookups are great!" Joey insisted. "It's all sex, no commitment, and most importantly, everything stays the same."
"Well, Joey, some of us like the change and commitment," said Rachel.
"Yeah, and some of us–" Joey motioned between himself and Chandler "–don't."
"Hey, don't lump me in with you!" Chandler exclaimed. "I can be committed!"
"Since when?" Joey challenged.
"Um, Janice?" said Chandler. "Kathy? I was really committed to both of them before they decided they'd rather be with other men!" He paused and considered this. "You know what? That actually doesn't sound great for me either. Please don't leave me," he added, grabbing Monica's hand.
Monica patted his hand and turned to Joey. "Joey, I'm sorry you don't like it, but things do change. You're just going to have to get used to the new normal."
"I hate the new normal," muttered Joey.
Despite having just returned from a week-long luxury vacation, Ross was exhausted. He had spent most of his solo honeymoon in his hotel room, racking up a massive phone bill. When he wasn't lying on the bed crying, he was calling Emily, calling her relatives, calling her friends. He pleaded with anyone who would listen and left a voicemail for anyone who wouldn't. In the end, he only managed to get in touch with Emily once, just before he left for the airport.
His plane arrived back in New York late on Saturday; too late to go see anyone. First thing in the morning on Sunday, he got dressed and headed to Rachel's apartment. They had a lot to talk about.
He ran into Phoebe on his way up the stairs. They greeted each other excitedly and hugged–a little awkwardly, as Phoebe was now large enough that Ross could barely get his arms around her. Phoebe filled him in on the health of the babies while they climbed the stairs.
"Well, I suppose you'll want to hear about my wedding," Ross said reluctantly as they reached the top of the stairs.
"Ugh, no thanks," snorted Phoebe, wrinkling her nose. "I've heard quite enough about that."
Of course, Ross thought, the others will have filled her in already. He was just glad he wouldn't have to relive it again.
He opened the door, which was always unlocked, and led the way inside. His friends were seated around the table, eating pancakes.
"Ooh, yay, everyone's here!" Phoebe exclaimed. "It's been such a long time since all six of us were together! Including me!"
Monica stood up and came to hug her brother. "How was Greece?" she asked.
"Oh, um, let's see," said Ross in mock thought. "How was my honeymoon that I took alone, without my wife, who ran out after our wedding? Yeah, it was just peachy."
"Have you talked to her yet?" Monica asked.
"Actually, yes, after hundreds of calls, I was finally able to get a hold of her yesterday morning before my plane left. And she told me something very interesting," he said, shifting his gaze to Rachel. "Do you know what she told me?"
"She… hoped you had fun in Greece?" said Rachel weakly.
"No," Ross growled, stepping past Monica to face Rachel. "She told me that she did come to the airport to see me. She told me that she saw you shoving me onto the plane. Away from her."
"You did what?" said Monica, whirling around to stare at Rachel.
"Oh no," said Phoebe.
"I told you the fighting would start again," groaned Joey to no one in particular.
"You didn't tell me Emily was there," Monica said to Rachel. "You just said you convinced Ross to take some time to think."
"I–I–" Rachel stammered, "I did see Emily, but only after Ross was already on the plane. And I didn't even talk to her! She just turned around and left without saying anything, which is just so rude–"
"Emily told me," Ross interrupted, fighting to maintain his composure, "that you looked right at her, saw her walking toward us, and then pushed me onto the plane."
"Oh," said Rachel. "Oh, see, in my defense…" She trailed off, twisting her hair nervously in her fingers. "...I didn't know she saw that."
"I can't believe this," Ross muttered, running both hands through his hair and beginning to pace the kitchen. "You really are trying to sabotage my marriage. Rachel, you broke up with me. You told me that we both have to move on. And now that I've done that, you're trying to ruin it for me?"
"I just don't think she's right for you!" Rachel protested. "You've barely known her two months–"
"Actually," Ross cut her off, "it's been seventy-two days, so jot that down."
"Fine," said Rachel, "two months, seventy-two days, whatever. We were together for a year! And a little after that! How can you possibly be sure–"
"I just know, okay?" said Ross. "I was with Carol even longer than that, and it still fell apart. The time doesn't matter–but that's not what this is about. This is about you intentionally sabotaging my marriage!"
"Ugh, Ross, I don't know why I even bother!" exclaimed Rachel. "You said my name at the altar! My name! You still love me and you know it! So you know what? I'm done arguing about this. When you come to your senses, I'll be waiting." With that, she strode into her room and slammed the door.
"Yeah, well I hope you're ready to wait a long time!" Ross yelled after her before considering what he was saying.
Ross was dimly aware of the rest of his friends staring at him, but he just hung his head and sighed. For several seconds, no one spoke.
Then Joey leaned over to Chandler and whispered, still loudly enough for Ross to hear, "So are you going to tell him you're still sleeping with his sister?"
"Shut up, Joey. Shut up, Joey!" Chandler whispered through gritted teeth.
Until now, Ross hadn't really registered that Chandler was in the room. He had been uncharacteristically quiet, and now Ross knew why.
In Greece, when he took breaks from thinking about Emily, Ross did think about Chandler and Monica. He had hoped that when he got home, Chandler would be ready to apologize and admit he was wrong, but it seemed he had done just the opposite and doubled down.
"Excuse me?" said Ross, whipping his head around to glare at Chandler.
"I–that's not–Joey doesn't–" Chandler stammered. Then he turned to Monica and gave her a light push towards Ross. "You tell him," he said.
"Look, Ross," said Monica without hesitation, "Chandler and I are dating now. Okay? And he makes me really happy, so you should be happy for us."
"Unbelievable," Ross said, looking past Monica and continuing to glare at Chandler.
"What do you want from me?" Chandler asked, flailing his arms in the air. "When you thought it was a one-night stand, you were mad. But now we're telling you we're serious, and you're still mad. What do you want me to do?"
"I don't know!" Ross whined. "You just never should have done it in the first place."
"Oh, sorry," snarked Chandler. "Let me just go get my time machine."
"I don't think this is about Chandler and me, Ross," Monica snapped. "This is about you and your own issues–"
"I hate the new normal," Joey repeated, cutting her off. "The new normal sucks. Everyone's always fighting in the new normal!"
"I hate it too!" said Phoebe. "There's all this drama and it's all from stupid London! I bet none of this shit would have happened if I had been there!"
Joey nodded in agreement.
"I gotta go," Ross muttered, not wanting to argue anymore. "I need to wait by the phone in case Emily calls me." He turned back to Chandler before leaving the room. "I hope you're a better boyfriend to Monica than you are a friend to me."
"I told you," Joey said, crossing his arms and shaking his head. "I told you Ross wouldn't like the new normal."
"The new normal is stupid," grumbled Phoebe.
"Ross is being totally unreasonable," said Monica.
"No, he's not," argued Joey. "He's being totally… un-unreasonable."
"You mean reasonable?" asked Chandler, sounding exhausted.
"Okay, Mr. Dictionary," spat Joey. "You might not care about Ross, but I do."
With that, he left the apartment. Maybe he could still catch up with Ross. He ran down the stairs and out the door onto the street. He only had to go about a half a block before he ran into his friend.
"Hey, Ross," Joey panted, slightly winded from the little jog.
"Hey, Joe." He stopped and turned to Joey.
"Look, I just want you to know," Joey said, "I'm totally on your side with all this."
"Really?" said Ross, perking up a little bit.
"Yeah," said Joey. "I've told Chandler I don't approve of his relationship with Monica. I tried to talk him out of it! He just won't listen to me."
"Well, thanks for trying."
"Do you really think Emily's going to call you?" Joey asked.
"I don't know," Ross shrugged. "She was pretty angry when I last spoke to her, but she said she'll think things over, so there's a chance. I'm not going to give up on her." He sighed. "I'm really sorry you and Phoebe had to get caught up in all that arguing up there."
"Hey, don't worry about it," said Joey, waving his hand dismissively. "Actually, that reminds me of something else I wanted to talk to you about. We're planning another trip."
"Another trip? We all just got back from London."
"All of us except Phoebe," Joey reminded him. Since he wasn't talking to Chandler, he had spent a lot of extra time with Phoebe over the past week. It was clear she felt left out. She got irritated any time Joey mentioned London, and she told him that London was all Monica, Chandler, and Rachel would talk about. "I thought it would be fun if we took a little trip with all six of us so she doesn't feel left out anymore."
"Oh, that's a great idea, Joey," said Ross. "Where are you going?"
"I don't know yet," said Joey.
"Um, okay," chuckled Ross. "Has anyone thrown out any ideas?"
"Well, no," Joey admitted, "but that's probably because I haven't told anyone else about the trip yet."
"You haven't… you haven't told anyone else?"
"Well, see, I've been giving Chandler the silent treatment since we got back," said Joey, "and he's always hanging out with Monica and Rachel, so I haven't seen much of them. And obviously I couldn't tell Phoebe, because it's supposed to be a surprise."
"So… when you said we've been planning a trip…"
"I actually just meant me, yeah," Joey confirmed with a nod. "Will you help me out?"
Ross considered this for a moment, but then he shook his head. "I don't know, Joey," Ross sighed. "It's a great idea, but I don't really want to go anywhere with Rachel right now. If you haven't noticed, things aren't so great between us."
"We can't just exclude Rachel," Joey said. "That would be mean."
Ross nodded. "Okay, so I'll just have to bow out then," he said. "That's fine. The five of you can go together. I should be focusing on Emily anyway. See you later."
He turned and continued walking down the street. Joey sighed. Ross seemed so sad. It didn't feel right for everyone to leave him alone this weekend. On the other hand, he was right: having Ross and Rachel there would just make everyone miserable. Only one of them could go. Maybe Rachel would understand if they went without her? But she'd be lonely by herself in her apartment without Monica…
Oh, no, thought Joey, I haven't even considered the Monica-and-Chandler situation! Even if Rachel didn't go, there would still be the issue of Ross versus Chandler and Monica. Joey put his hands on his hips and let out a big puff of air. This is exactly what he was trying to warn Chandler about. He and Monica were wrecking the group dynamic, and come to think of it, so was Rachel.
"Ross!"
Ross hadn't gone far. He turned around and waited for Joey to catch up to him.
"I think you should go on the trip. I think you really need to be around friends right now."
"Thanks, Joey, but I really don't want to be around–"
"I know," Joey said. "And I'm guessing you don't really want to be around Chandler and Monica either."
"Yeah," Ross admitted, shuffling his feet.
"Well, if we don't invite Rachel or Chandler and Monica… then it's just three friends on a trip. If only half of us go, we're not specifically excluding one person. Right?"
Ross rubbed the back of his neck, considering this. "Yeah," he said. "Yeah, I guess so."
"Besides," said Joey, "if they wanted to be invited, maybe they should have thought of that before they started this mess."
Author's Note: There were actually supposed to be three more scenes in this chapter, but it got so long I decided to split it into two.
