A/N: Again, zero chance of an audit moving this quickly or proceeding in this manner.
Chapter Forty-Four: Secrets and Lies
Saturday, March 9, 1991
"I don't know why they want to see our current financials, anyway," Angela said, standing behind the desk in her home office and opening an envelope from her bank. "The audit is for our 1990 tax returns."
"Something weird is going on. Both of us getting audited at the same time? That can't be random," Tony complained. A week earlier, they had each received letters from the IRS, notifying them that an agent would be at their home at 4pm on Thursday, March 21st. A stack of his bank and credit card statements had taken up residence in the den, alongside a banker's box full of her records.
"I'll have to cancel our session with Dr. Sweetin," she said. "I'm not sure how long it's going to take."
"Well, Jonathan and Sam usually go to the club on Thursdays. It's probably best that he not be around to see us get eviscerated by the US government," he said, approaching Angela behind the desk.
She turned and put her arms around his neck. "Speaking of the club, we need to go this month. We're never going to make our food and drink minimum on baskets of fries and sodas."
He gave her a quick kiss. "It's getting warm enough to play tennis again."
"I'm sensing ulterior motives," she said, running a hand down his arm.
"You don't just look great in those little skirts," he told her with a double-handed squeeze of her tush, "you're also very perceptive."
"Let's have dinner there next Friday, when they have live music," she said, before grazing her lips over his.
"Dancing with the prettiest gal in the tri-state area? You're on." Tony kissed Angela firmly and then let her go with a pat on her derriere. "Hey, since we have all this paperwork out, do you want to talk about combining our finances?"
"That's a good idea." She pulled out a yellow pad and a calculator. "We can put my monthly income and expenses in one column, and yours in the other, and then add them up." She wrote their first initials at the top of each column with a plus sign between them, added an equal sign, and drew a heart.
They sat on the loveseat and came up with estimates for all the major items. Tony's side of the ledger was sparse, and Angela's ran onto a second page. They decided not to include his salary in either his income or her expenses, modeling how their finances would look, without the pretense of his employment, down the right-hand side of the paper.
"I didn't see any charges for your sessions with Dr. Campbell," Tony remarked.
"Right there," Angela said, pointing to her January bank statement.
"But where are the rest of them?" he asked. When she didn't answer, he pressed her. "You did go back, didn't you?"
"No?" she whispered, bringing a closed hand to her face.
Tony pulled her hand out of the way and spoke calmly, looking her in the eyes. "You said you would go for your follow up. I thought you were working on your issues."
"I didn't need to go. Everything has been fine," she said.
"Why did you lie to me?" He was hurt. Hurt and worried, not just about her, but about their blossoming relationship.
"I didn't lie. I just didn't tell you the truth," she said, looking down and biting her lip.
"Well, you have amnesty now." Tony tilted her chin up. "Please, Angela. I want to know what's going on with you."
"I was supposed to go at the beginning of February, but I really felt pointless. I mean, I managed to talk about Michael for hours that Sunday, and I even talked to him on the phone without fighting. I didn't turn to any of my usual vices. I can show you my journal."
"Those are your private thoughts. I don't want to read something I might misinterpret. I'd rather have you just tell me directly."
"Fine, I felt like I was doing better, so I canceled my appointment."
"What did you do after that, Angela?"
"What do you mean?"
"Did you get upset and go shopping?" There were several large credit card charges, followed by large refunds three and four days later, on her statement.
"Maybe," she prevaricated. Tony gave her one of his looks, like he could see right into her soul. "Alright, yes, but I returned almost everything. What's the harm?"
"If you thought it was harmless, you wouldn't be hiding it."
"Maybe I'm not used to you tracking my every move. You know, before we got together, I did have my own life outside of you."
"Jesus, Angela, you make it sound like I'm a stalker. Don't you understand that I care about you? I thought you felt the same way. I do my best to organize our busy schedules so we can spend time together."
"Uh huh," she said, wanting nothing more than to bolt. She considered buying a chocolate cake at the grocery store and eating the entire thing with a plastic fork in her car.
"Why did you go shopping, Angela?" He reached for the February Visa statement. "On the fifteenth. Was it something I did? Something I said?"
"I tried to be happy, when the kids made us that nice dinner for Valentine's Day, but after Jonathan got home from hanging out with Sam, he wouldn't even talk to me. It made me feel awful."
"You were all over me that night. I thought you were just in a romantic mood." He couldn't tell her that he had noticed how amorous she was right before her period. His choice of dark sheets was motivated by a desire to hide any resulting stains. "You didn't want me. You were just burying your feelings again."
"I did want you. Especially after everything you said in therapy about missing Marie. I wanted to remind you that I was here, and I wanted to make you mine."
"I am yours. You don't have to compete with anyone, especially someone who's been gone for more than a decade." Tony sighed. "Will you please go back to Dr. Campbell? I don't know how to fix this, and it scares the hell out of me."
Angela nodded. "I think I'd like to be alone right now," she told him. He stepped out and closed the door behind him, holding his head in both hands for a moment before going into the kitchen for a glass of water.
Jonathan was on the phone with Luke "I'll see you soon. Bye." He turned to Tony with a smile. "They're going to pick me up at 2:30. I know you wanted me to talk to Mom before I go. Is she busy right now?"
"It's not a good time, pal. I think we need to let her be by herself for a while."
"But you said I couldn't go unless I told her. I'm all packed."
"Sit down, Jonathan." Tony said, pulling himself up to the table. "Tell me about your accommodations. Are you going to be sharing a room with Luke?"
"We're all staying in one hotel room. His parents have a double and he has a single. I said I would sleep on the rollaway since I'm smaller."
"OK. And what's going on between you and Luke? Have you told him you like him?"
"We've talked about it. We both like each other, and we've held hands a few times."
"That's all?" Tony rubbed his forehead. "Alright, let's do this. You two keep things tame, and you can tell your mom after the trip."
"What if he wants to kiss? I think we might be ready for that."
"I just don't want to see any hickeys on you. Or him. Got it?"
When Luke's family arrived, Angela dragged herself out to hug Jonathan goodbye. "I love you, darling," she called out the door, causing her son to cringe before catching himself.
"I love you, Mom. You, too, Tony!" he yelled.
Angela shut the front door. "Can we talk now?" she asked Tony.
"Oh, are you done being alone?" he sniped. "Sorry, that was out of line," he said, sitting on the couch. He held out an arm and waited for her to take her place under it.
"I'm the one who was out of line. I should have at least told you that I didn't plan on going back to Dr. Campbell," she admitted.
"Sometimes it seems like I get all the blame for not being ready to make a commitment, but you have just as much to work on," he vented.
"More."
"I love you, but it really hurts to know that you don't feel safe being honest with me."
"I'm sorry. I love you, too, and I'll address my insecurities. It's not really about you, you know." She turned and kissed his jaw. "I'm just a mess, underneath it all."
"But you're my mess," he countered, nibbling at her ear. They began to express their devotion through little pecks that turned to sloppy kisses. Angela pulled Tony's shirt out of his jeans and groped at his torso, while he pulled her to straddle his lap, massaging her backside just as he had done in her office. Things were starting to heat up when Mona came through the door with a suitcase.
"My taxi to the airport will be here soon," she said. Angela paused her quest to map the inside of Tony's mouth and looked up, not bothering to move out of his lap.
"Where are you going again?" she asked her mother.
"Key West. Don't you listen? Or are you too excited to finally have the house to yourselves this week?" Mona checked her watch. "Did Jonathan and his boyfriend already leave? Oh well." A honk sounded from the curb, and she dragged her suitcase outside. "Bye!" she yelled.
Angela's mouth hung open, and she was unable to voice a farewell. She pushed Tony to arm's length by his shoulders and looked at him, finally squeezing out a single syllable. "What?"
