Chapter 4 – Patrem et Filium

January 16th, 2552 - (09:30 Hours - Military Calendar)

Epsilon Eridani System, Reach

Csaba Mountain Region, Viery Territory

Falchion Base

:********:

For Duncan, the last few days couldn't have gone by fast enough. Time crawled past, one drill after another. Epsilon got up long before reveille for squad runs down the footpaths that networked much of Csaba. They operated through environmental scenarios at the RTETC building. They worked for longer hours at the gun range, each practicing with their weakest weapon classification. For Duncan, it was his trouble with long distance that saddled him with the SRS-99, blowing golf-ball sized holes through two-dimensional Elite models. The echoing report of each round reminded him exactly why they were doing it all.

The Staff wanted them at their sharpest for the next mission. Victory or not, no one wanted a repeat of Ballast. It showed in their unwavering resolve, never batting an eye at hard PTs that left them working well into the night. Whatever time was not needed for food and rest was spent on rigorous training, on shoring up their discipline from the level of the squad down to the level of the individual trooper. Hence why Duncan barely had the chance to contact Erica. When he did, it was because he snuck away from his bunks to the communications floor in the middle of the night. Everyone was too exhausted, trying to seize what hours of sleep they could, to care what he was up to.

Then came the weekend. It was a heaven-sent. The Staff let them have it to themselves. They diffused around Falchion, taking the chance to relax with friends in other companies, to eat or to sleep until their eyes cracked open. However, they all agreed to come back to the Dante Building for Duncan. No one wanted to miss his family visit, a thing they had all come to look forward to over the years.

None of them looked forward to it more than Duncan himself, and when the morning came, he was off to the base's starport. Hector was gracious enough to give him the ride over. The Warthog drove smoothly through the dawn traffic. Troop carriers had filled the streets with elements of an Army battalion that was transiting through. To where, he wasn't sure, but their long, bloodshot stares spoke of an extended trip, likely intersystem.

They reached the fenced perimeter of the base's starport and parked outside the gates, joining dozens of other servicemen already waiting there. The starship was right on schedule. The sleek craft was a jet-like aircraft that came in quietly over the mountain range. He wasn't sure whether it was really quiet or if the clock beating in his chest was drowning out everything else. Whatever the case, he was tense, watching closely as the craft slowed above the small landing zone. The cry of the engines relaxed with each meter of their descent. Then the touchdown.

Minutes rolled past before the rear ramp lowered and the passengers flowed out. Duncan sifted through the faces. It didn't take long for him to spot the pairs of emerald eyes he was searching for, and even less time for them to spot him.

Erica and Noah were walking down the ramp with their suitcases, hand in hand. Noah noticed him first. They had barely reached the tarmac before he tugged his mother by the sleeve and pointed. By then, Duncan was already running.

He ran past the squad of MPs posted at the gate and jogged across the tarmac, never taking his eyes off them. Erica and Noah did the same, running out from the rest of the crowds, people waving and shouting at family members beyond the fence, to meet their own. So many months of separation were closed in a few quick steps.

Arms wide, Duncan wrapped them in and pulled them close. Erica squeezed him tight as Noah caught his waist in a bear hug. They held each other for a while, teetering and balancing. Behind and around them, the other passengers reached the gates and embraced those waiting for them there. Loud hails, welcoming words and gleeful chats bubbled up around them, but none could penetrate the silent bubble that had formed around the Iris family. They were an island unto themselves in a sea of people, remaining together even as everyone else dispersed.

A minute crept by, at the end of which Erica finally took her head out the crux of Duncan's neck, leaving it damp with the same emotion that glistened in both their eyes. Without a word, she took him by the back of his head and locked his lips with her own. The familiar warmth washed over his mind, a feeling he wished he could keep. It only reminded him how rare it was, and how special. He savored every moment until she pulled away for air.

The longing in her gaze kept him magnetized to hers, forging smiles that reflected one other like a mirror.

"Hey you." Duncan grinned.

"Hey Helljumper." She grinned back. "Had a fun time in the fire while we were gone?"

"You could say that, but heaven's feeling pretty good right now. I think I'll stay here for a bit if you don't mind."

They moved in for another kiss when a groan stopped them. They turned to the third member of the family who frowned up at them.

"Do you have to do that right in front of me every time?"

Duncan smiled at him and ran a playful hand through his hair. "Hey bud, what's the problem?"

"You guys could just do that later. I don't have to see it."

Erica gave him a look. Duncan stepped in. "Listen buddy, if you don't like it when I get with my wife, you can go find your own, okay? How's that sound?"

"Sounds gross." Noah said as giggles fractured the mask of his frown. "You're gross."

"Gross?" He glanced at Erica who shook her head. "Hey now, don't you got a girl you like back at school?"

A blush rushed through his son's face and he turned away. "Nope. No I don't. That's gross."

Duncan caught a beckoning nod from Erica. He leaned over for her to whisper in his ear. "It's the cooties phase. You know how they are at that age. He's in denial."

"Ah."

"What'd you say?" Noah intruded. "Dad, whatever she said, it's not true."

Duncan's grin turned malicious. "Yup. She's lying, right? All lies." He suddenly looked up to a spot far away, feigning surprise. "Woah, woah-woah-woah, what's that?"

Noah looked. "What? What?"

Duncan grabbed the top of his head and held it there. "Stop. Don't move. Whatever you do, don't turn around, okay?"

"Wha-, why? What's-"

"Just don't turn around, trust me." Duncan let him go. He winked at Erica. She rolled her eyes as he took her by the chin and guided her lips back to his. Again, that warm feeling.

Getting curious, Noah turned around. "What're you-" He immediately turned away, gagging.

Duncan shrugged. "Hey, I told you not to turn around. But now you know what to do when you get a wife of your own, okay son?"

"When you're older." Erica coughed.

"Right, when you're older."

Coming off his gag session, Noah shook his head, crossing his arms defiantly. "Well, I'm never getting older then 'cause girls are gross."

Duncan faked shock. "What about your mom?"

"Mom's not a girl, she's a mom. There's a difference."

"Ugh."

Erica laughed. "Well, at least I'm not gross."

"I don't get it, Noe. You say its gross but how do you think you got here?"

"What do you mean?" Noah pointed to the starship incredulously. "The ship's right there. What, do you need glasses already, dad?"

"N-, no, I mean, how-"

"When he's older." Erica coughed again.

"Oh...oh yeah." Duncan leaned and whispered to her. "I need to get better at this."

"Yes, yes you do."

The beep of a horn pulled their attention back beyond the fence. Hector was still waiting in the Hog.

Noah's eyes brightened. He hailed excitedly. "Hey, Uncle Heck!"

Hector smiled and waved back.

Duncan led the two of them by the hand. They strolled out through the gates as a lineup of dozens of servicemen and women went the opposite way, carrying duffels for their own trip back into the civilian sector.

Nearly to the Hog, Noah broke off running for the driver's seat. Hector hopped out from behind the wheel with arms wide and Noah dropped his suitcase to hurl himself into them.

Hector raised him up high and swung him around, much to his giggling joy. "Hey little buddy, how you been?" He rested him atop his shoulder, his giant size by comparison making Noah look like a perched parakeet.

"Okay, I guess. I couldn't wait to see you guys again, so..."

"Aww, you missed us?"

"Yup. But don't get used to it though." Noah joked. "I only miss you sometimes."

"Ouch. Good thing I'm your favorite uncle then, right?"

Noah looked away shyly.

"Right?"

"Ugh, sure, Uncle Heck. Sure."

"Ouch. D, Noe's hurting my feelings again."

Duncan wagged a finger. "Now Noe, what've I told you about hurting Heck's feelings?"

"Hmmm, that it's okay because he's a big guy and he can take it?"

Hector prodded his waistline. "Am I really that big?"

"Anyways." Duncan hoisted Noah's suitcase into the troop section and loaded Erica's for her. "Let's get going."

"Ooh, can I drive this time?" Noah pleaded, shooting his best puppy dog eyes at Hector. "Can I, can I, please? Please-please-please-please-please?"

"Ugh, that's up to your parents, pal."

The puppy dog eyes shifted their way. Erica looked uncertain. "Well-…"

"No worries." Hector assured. "I can handle him if you say so."

Her uncertainty diminished by a bare fraction. "Noe, I don't-" Then the puppy eyes locked onto hers and stared her down. Hector joined in, quivering his lip in the best imitation of a sad Pitbull Duncan had ever seen.

Erica gave in, laughing. "Fine, fine, but only if your dad agrees-"

"Just make sure to keep us on the road." Duncan said as he pulled himself into the troop section. He rounded on Erica and offered a hand. Momentarily stunned, she cleared her throat.

"And only if Uncle Heck agrees since he'll be the one helping you."

Hector grinned at the boy on his shoulder. "You heard her, only if I agree."

Noah was relentless and took aim with the same pleading pupils. "Pleeease."

"Why should I?"

"What if I said 'pretty' please?"

"No-no, that won't do. What have you done for me lately?"

"I'll...make you my favorite uncle?"

Hector mulled it over. "Promise to say it in front of the others and you've got a deal."

"Deal."

The two shook hands.

"Pleasure doing business with you, Mr. Iris. Alright, let's go." Hector maneuvered himself into the driver's seat. He sat Noah on his lap, not even getting a second to strap them in before his newest driving student got a hold of the wheel, turning it left then right. The tires crunched over the asphalt in response. Hector held his hands still.

"Relax, would you? I haven't switched it on yet."

"Hurry up."

"Don't rush the process, Noe."

"I'm not rushing the process, I'm rushing you."

Hector sighed as behind him, Duncan pulled Erica into the troop-section. The couple settled down. Comfortable in his seat, Duncan saw that his wife was the exact opposite. She kept trading unsure glances with him and the two up front.

"Eri, look at me."

She focused rather coyly on him. "Yes?"

"He's fine. Heck's the best driver in the squad, nothing will happen."

"You said that the last time Noah tried it out and we almost drove straight into the civilian res building."

The engines burbled beneath them. Duncan smirked. "That was last time. This time's different."

"Why?"

"Because-...because I said so."

She looked unamused. "That doesn't-"

"Besides, you've got me as a crash pillow. That should be enough, right?"

Her worries softened into mild amusement. With a reluctant sigh she accepted his offer, laying her head on his chest while he wrapped his arms around her.

The Warthog turned and started back into Falchion. Duncan took the chance to enjoy the trip. The way Erica snuggled into him gave him more reason to. That same inner warmth seemed to radiate out from her and into himself, and in that moment, he felt an urge to hold onto her for all he was worth.

:********:

The ride was surprisingly smooth. Duncan had Hector to thank for that. While Noah enjoyed shifting the wheel around, his uncle kept his knee directly beneath it in order to do the actual piloting: the perks of being Epsilon's best driver. Not that Noah seemed to mind. He was fixated almost entirely on the world beyond the windshield. From the Cheshire cat grin in the rearview mirror to the spark in his eyes that flared every time he 'turned' a corner, he was loving every second of it.

Duncan tilted over Erica. "Babe?"

"Yeah?"

"I'll need you to do something for me."

"Mhm?"

"...We're not going directly to the civilian residential building. We're actually stopping at the Dante Building first. I wanted to drop you off there so I could get a minute with Noah."

Erica sat up; her curiosity piqued. "Why?"

Duncan looked about, doing everything in his power not to meet her gaze. That did little more than agitate her further.

"Honey? Tell me what's going on?"

There was no way around it. He had gotten himself cornered. The hope that she would simply accept the plan without issue blew up in his face. He wasn't sure why he thought it would work to begin with.

Duncan took her hand in his, a comforting gesture that accomplished the exact opposite.

"I wanted to spend some time with him, alone." He peered at Noah, eying the determination plastered over his face as they accelerated down an empty street. "To catch up." He smiled at her. "Father and son time, you know? I mean, how often does he get to see me? I want to find out how he's really doing."

Erica relaxed. "Oh."

"Will that be okay?"

"Sure. To be honest, that's great. He's really needed you these last few months." She bit her lip. "He's really needed us."

Those words lit a fire in him and Duncan was locked within her stare. The chilling quietness that resumed made the earlier warmth vanish from his memory. He checked Noah again, his son excited at the wind rushing through his hair.

Guilt clutched at his throat. "I see."

He felt Erica wrap her arms around him. She used his shoulder like a pillow. "Don't do it."

"What?"

"Don't blame yourself. You're not the only one whose guilty here. I'm his parent too, aren't I?"

Duncan let go of a long, grateful sigh. She always knew what to say when it counted. He lay his head on hers. "He's gotten bigger, hasn't he?"

"Yup."

"How much longer 'till I'm looking up to him?"

"I've been asking myself the same thing lately. He's still seven though. We've still got time."

Duncan nodded. "We've still got time."

Did they?

The thought lingered even as he changed subject. "So...I was hoping to drop you off at the Dante Building for a minute since its closer. It'd give me some time to talk. We'll be right back, I promise."

"That's alright, I was hoping to see everyone today anyway." Erica slapped his arm. "Take your time."

"Yes mam."

With a right-side turn, Noah drove them onto Bravo Company's street. Hector helped bring them to a calm stop in front of the Dante Building. He immediately planted Noah on the sidewalk and hopped out, ending his driving lesson for the day. His pupil stared back expectantly. "So where are we going next?"

"Again?" Hector turned to Duncan and Erica as they stepped down to the pavement. The former winked at him.

"Maybe we'll go somewhere later. Better yet, your dad will take you."

"Dad?"

Duncan gestured back to the Hog. "Come on, Noe. We're going on a drive."

"To where?"

"You'll see. It's a surprise." Duncan slid behind the wheel and offered his hand. Noah readily took it and he settled him in the passenger seat. "You're my co-pilot for today."

"I like being pilot better." Noah groaned while his father buckled him in.

"Trust me, I'll make it up to you." And he was dead-set on doing just that.

"Hmm, okay. Mom, you're not coming?"

Erica stood off next to Hector. "No, I'll let you and dad hang out for a bit. Think of it like a boy's day out."

"Really?" The spark returned. "Coool. Dad, we're going for a boy's day out?"

"Maybe not a day." Duncan admitted. "More like we're-, you know what, yeah, it's our day out. Is that okay with you, pal?"

Noah thought about it.

"Or do you think you'll be too scared to hang out with me?"

"No." Noah sputtered. "No way am I scared."

That did the trick.

"Good. Now you can impress the girls at your school by telling them you hang out with ODSTs in your spare time." Duncan watched satisfied at how fast his son's face reddened.

Noah tried to veil it with his hands. "Dad, I told you, girls are-"

The burbling of the engines drowned him out.

:********:

Erica watched the Warthog fishtail about, waving after it while her two boys, her two men, shot down the street. With a turn of the corner, they were gone. Seeing the two together was sobering. The thought of them having fun together was even more so.

"Let's hope they don't do anything too crazy." Hector said.

"Let's hope." Erica agreed.

"Like father like son." The Staff said. "They'll be fine."

"Right-" Erica twisted around, surprised to find the Staff standing beside her. "Woah, hey, when did you get here?"

The Staff kept gazing down the street, as if making sure the two in the Hog were gone. "About a few seconds ago."

"How're you so quiet?"

"I wasn't. The Hog was just too loud. Someone should get that thing a tune-up."

Hector took the hint. "I'm trying, sir, but scheduling one's not that easy these days."

"You say that every time." The Staff dialed in on her. "Erica, good to see you." He held out his arms and she happily took him up on his offer, embracing the man that made sure hers always made it back to her alive.

"Good to see you, Staff."

"Likewise." He let her go. "I guess you two aren't hanging around for long. No suitcases?"

"They're back in the Hog."

At the mention, the Staff traded a passing glance with Hector. "Good. Great. That gives us some time then."

"For what?"

The two ODSTs shared a nod and the Staff gestured to the entrance. "We need to talk."

Not sure what was going on, Erica nonplussed, said "sure" and followed them to the front doors. So too did a sinking feeling, a feeling that something was seriously and unalterably wrong.

"********:

The drive was anything but quiet. Noah never hesitated to pelt him with one question after another, ranging from any number of topics, from where he'd been to what everyone else was up to. Duncan batted them away with a casual "yes" or "no", stumping his efforts for details. And there would be details. Just not now. Soon. Probably sooner than Noah was ready for.

In minutes, they were crunching down a gravel road leading to the forests that skirted Falchion's southern edge. They reached the last perimeter fence, passed the final checkpoint and slipped into the vast wilderness of the Viery territory. He kept them along a forest trail that wormed its way from the Csaba mountains to a place he knew his son would love.

Half a kilometer later, the ground sloped down and the dense forests gave way to a scenic view; a dark-watered lake far below. The trail slithered down to its northern banks. Even while they drifted down its length, they could see that they weren't the first to the lake. Noah pointed them out:

"Hey, look! Down there, birds, a whole bunch of them!"

"Yup." Duncan said. "Moa."

A whole flock of them. Dozens of the stalky, ostrich like featherheads were encamped around the lake's outer banks. They strolled about to dip their thirsty beaks into the water or lay leisurely atop their dugout nests. The heads of a handful twitched their way as the Hog reached the end of the trail.

Duncan eased onto the edge of the outer bank and switched off the engine. The second he swung his feet onto the ground, the nearest Moa bolted in every other direction. They disappeared into the tree-line or gravitated towards those nested on the other end. He had made sure to park a good distance from the nests. The man who always loved to hunt them had once told him never to mess around with their eggs. The males would flee for anything and so would the females, but both would hold their ground or even charge if anyone got too close to their young. On this side the two of them would be safe to enjoy their father-son trip to the zoo, albeit one with no cages.

Noah undid his seatbelt and ran out to the water.

"Wait for me, Noe." Duncan called.

"Last one to the lake's a rotten egg!" Noah laughed, pumping his legs even harder, slowing when Duncan raced past. "Hey, wait!"

"Nope!" Duncan lied but started slowing down enough for him to catch up. They jumped down a grassy berm onto the inner banks and made for the finish-line. He pretended to strain to the very end while Noah cruised ahead, reaching the water's edge first.

"Hah!"

Duncan skidded to a stop, gulping mouthfuls of air. "How-, how did you-…one sec."

Noah wagged a finger. "Dad, you shouldn't be this slow. You're an ODST."

"Yeah, you're right. I'll try harder next time."

"What do you mean? You didn't try at all. I know you're faster than that." He put his hands to his hips, disappointed. "You only wanted to make me feel good about winning."

Duncan shrugged, accepting that he'd been caught. "Did it work?"

Noah nodded. "Yeah."

"Good." Duncan ruffled his hair and guided him back by the shoulder. They plopped down beneath the shade of the berm. The flock of Moa were still keeping a close eye on them from afar. Those that were of the braver quality were beginning to meander back towards where they'd been standing.

The world slowly returned to its natural rhythm around them. The soft wind was cool and it rippled across the water's surface, whistling between him and Noah along with the squawks of the resident fowls. But they were nothing more than distractions.

Though they were sitting so close, Duncan sensed it. Despite all the noises of nature, there was no natural noise between them. Within that silence there was a void that seemed to swallow up every other sound until he could hear nothing else. And in that void, there was nothing and everything; an enduring realization of everything that it wasn't, that it was supposed to be.

Duncan reached for a thought, for anything that might yield itself up for a good conversation starter. His mind went blank. He heard Noah shift about. Out the corner of his eye he saw him peeking at him.

"So Noe...how've you been holding up?"

Noah brightened up, looking relieved. "Oh, ugh, I'm-...I'm okay."

"Really, because your mom's told me otherwise."

He eyebrowed him. "What? What'd she say? Whatever it is-"

"I know, I know, she's lying." Duncan winked. "Seriously, what are you up to? I want to hear it from you."

Noah looked away. He drove a nervous finger into the dirt and traced it through the small pebbles. "Okay, so, it's not my fault."

"What's not your fault?"

He blushed. "You know what I mean."

"No, I don't. Tell me."

Noah tensed. "I was bored. That's why I hang out with them, Daniel and Tommy. And it's not like-..."

"Like?"

"...Like I have a lot of friends."

A long quiet fell over the conversation. Duncan felt a nail hammered into his heart at the way Noah talked, at the wistfulness in those green orbs that wondered across the lake. At length, he watched him pick up a rock and try to skip it over the water. It struck once before the lake swallowed it up. Noah hugged his knees closer to himself. "I know what she wants me to do."

"And?"

He shook his head. "And I don't want to do it."

Duncan picked up a rock for himself and tossed it, watching it disappear after a single throw. "What do you guys do exactly?"

"Didn't she tell you already?"

"Like I said, I want to hear it from you."

Noah sighed. "I don't know, they're fun to be around. We do pranks. On my last one I just tossed a bunch of water on someone back at the hotel."

Duncan tossed another rock that got twice as far as the last. "Ms. Turner."

"So she did tell you."

"That and how you got caught by the police, and other stuff too."

Noah sank a bit.

"I think I see the problem. You're causing too much trouble. Now you need to throw your mom off your scent." Duncan smirked. "And I think I can help."

Noah marveled at him. "How?"

"Advice." Duncan picked up two rocks and tossed one into Noah's palm. He aimed the second between his thumb and forefinger. "A little word to the wise. When I was your age, I got into problems sometimes too. In fact, my mom, your other grandmother, talked to me once after I almost broke my legs jumping from a tree. She wanted me to stop."

"Why'd you jump from a tree?"

"See what I am now? That's what I always knew I wanted to be. Jumping was just part of it. Anyway, let me tell you what I did." Duncan reeled back and tossed the rock, watching satisfied at the three times that it skipped. "You see, I never stopped jumping from trees as a kid. Instead, I switched to jumping from shorter heights so I didn't hurt myself. I also worked on learning how to land properly. Trust me, it helped later."

Noah frowned, unimpressed. "What's your point, dad? I don't jump from trees."

"No." He crouched down next to him and took his rock. "But you do sneak past the guards at your school, crawl through vents and plan pranks the way my guys plan an op."

"What's an op?"

"It's short for operation."

"...What's an operation?"

Duncan, remembering who he was talking to, tried to knit an explanation together that would suit someone his age. "I-, it's like a thing you plan to do, like a mission."

That did him the uncomfortable favor of reminding him why he was really here. He stifled the thought.

"Look, we're getting off track. What I'm trying to say is this." Duncan helped Noah reel back his arm to the right distance, angling it to the perfect degree. "Throw."

Noah tossed it. The rock sailed even farther than the last, flying a few meters then bouncing four times before skidding into the depths.

"Woah, how'd you do that?"

"Me? You did that. I only helped. Now think, what did I do to help you?"

Dumbfounded for a moment, Noah checked his arm. "You...I don't know, what did you do?"

"Think, Noe. Think hard."

Noah drew his fingers to his temples and strained.

"Noe?"

"I'm...thinking..."

A nerve popped in his forehead. Duncan shook his shoulder. "Hey-hey, relax. The last thing I need you to do is rip one out in the open. You'll scare off the Moa."

Noah gasped for air. When he finished, his attention wandered back to the Moa. He observed them more closely as they continued to relax and stroll around the banks of the lake. A light of logic turned on in his head.

"I think I know."

"What?"

"You made me relax a little and hold it closer. How I was holding it, I ended up throwing too hard. I thought that's what I had to do to get it far, but that's not what you did."

Duncan beamed with fatherly pleasure. "It's called adjusting your aim, or fixing it." He sat back down next to him. "And that's what you might need to do with your friends. Your mom's worried you might do something even crazier, and honestly, so am I. But I'm not worried about you getting into trouble. I'm worried about you not knowing what to do once you get into it, because sometimes, old boy, there's no getting away from it. Sometimes trouble just comes looking for you."

An image; a blood-soaked meat cleaver lying ownerless on a forest floor, a shoulder covered in viscera, a primed incendiary grenade. Another thought stifled. Duncan seized it by the throat and strangled it until he wrestled the thing back into whatever abscess it had crawled out from. Experience had made it easier this time. Slowly he regained himself.

"Dad?" Noah was leaning over to him, waving in his face. "Dad, you there?"

Duncan blinked away the last whisps of the memory. "Sorry. Like I was saying, sometimes-" The desire not to finish the sentence seized his tongue. "Anyway, here's what I'm getting at. I don't expect you to be perfect, Noe. I don't want you to be either. I want you to have adventures, the kind you'll remember years from now and hopefully in a good way. Not getting arrested or drenching someone. That said, there's never any telling how things will go." He poked his forehead. "So, I'll need you to learn to use 'that' to adjust your aim, to plan good adventures, good ops. Good ops lead to a good life, buddy. The way you can do that is simple."

Duncan handed him another rock. "Try making new friends while keeping your old ones."

Noah hesitated, but Duncan tapped his shoulder and he relaxed. With the right angle, he made the toss. The little rock flew for a while, bounced off the surface in five clean arcs then slid smoothly into the depths.

"Good shot."

Though Duncan was ready to celebrate, he saw that Noah still looked unsure.

"Hey, what's wrong?"

"Make new friends? I don't know..."

"I want you to push yourself, Noe. You can do it. I'm not saying you have to give up on Tommy and Daniel, but let your mom see that you're trying. Let yourself see that. You think you can't make new friends. Did you even try before you started telling yourself that?"

Noah grimaced at him. "I did."

"Noah?"

Before his father's scrutinizing eye, Noah briefly held fast. It didn't take long for him to yield and he deflated again. "It's hard, dad. It's hard to talk to them."

Duncan noticed the sudden nervousness. He had a sneaking suspicion that made him see what might lie behind it. The understanding etched a new smirk on his face.

"Who is she?"

The way his son froze up told him he was right on target. "Noe?"

"I-, dad, why don't you show me how to throw again. Please? Let's-"

"What's her name?"

Noah took up a rock and tossed it, but it was a bad throw and failed to get very far. Duncan paid it no heed, smiling down at him. Noah bit his lip, unconsciously mirroring his mother, a sign he was truly nervous. Probably figuring his father would never waver, he finally relaxed.

"Emma. Her name's Emma."

"Mhm. She's in your class?"

"Yeah."

"I see."

Duncan began to perceive the situation more clearly. Noah wasn't having trouble making friends. He was having trouble talking to girls. What he said his problem was had actually proven to be him trying to deny that fact. Unbeknownst to him, Duncan noticed a path forward. Noah's supposed problem might actually be the solution to his real one.

"Talking to girls is no big deal, boyo." Duncan chuckled. "Listen, you like Emma, right?"

Noah pulled his knees back to his chest and burrowed his head between his legs, hiding his face. He gave the most subtle of nods.

"Hmph." Duncan picked a rock to toss around and catch. "You know, me and your mother started out as friends. We stayed that way for a while too. I didn't think we'd ever like each other that way or anything but, years later, well, here you are. So I guess you could say things didn't stay the same." He laid the rock on top of Noah's head. "Here's what I recommend. Try not to think about it too much. That's all."

Noah peeked an eye out. "That's it?"

"Yup. Think about what you did to get Tommy and Daniel to be your friends. Not much, right?"

Noah turned away. "That was different."

"Maybe. It shouldn't need to be. Let things be what they may, Noe. If she likes you, it'll happen. If she doesn't, well, you'll still have a new friend."

Noah peeked again. "But I want her to like me."

"There's no telling what'll happen, Noe. Believe me, being friends is easier than being boyfriend and girlfriend, or husband and wife. I don't know if this is too high above your level but I think you get it."

"Sure, I guess."

"Good. Does she like anything you do?"

"...We like some of the same games."

"That's good. Start there and let things grow." Duncan took the rock off his head, opened his hand for him and placed it in his palm. "Just stop worrying. It's too early for you to be doing that. You still have a ton of those adventures left ahead of you, so relax." He assisted his arm back into the proper position. "Take it easy and you'll see how far you get."

Noah stayed there as he let him go. After a second, some sense of reassurance took him over and he threw it. This time the rock skipped seven times before splashing down for good.

"See? That's what happens when you..."

"Take it easy."

Noah's smile returned, faint but growing stronger by the second. The sight was a God-sent for Duncan and he did his best to soak in the moment. This would make his first time giving his son advice on girls, probably not the last either. Whatever the case, he treasured it.

"Hey dad?"

"Yeah?"

"I wish we could talk like this all the time."

The feeling evaporated.

A new one emerged that wrapped its coils around his neck until he could hardly breathe. He would have felt better if an Elite had kicked him square in the stomach. He swallowed hard. "Yeah champ, me too." was all he could bring himself to say.

"Did grandpa teach you all that stuff, about taking it easy?"

"Huh, you mean your mom's dad? No. He didn't."

"No, not gramps. You know, your dad?"

If he wished an Elite had kicked him before, Duncan preferred a plasma bolt straight to the face now. That would have been better.

"No, he didn't. I had to learn it on my own."

A shock buzzed through his frame, a recognition too awful to say aloud. Noah was seven. He would be eight years old in two months. And he still had his dad. By the time he was Noah's age, his own dad was already dead. Then it hit him in the way an energy mortar couldn't; a slow and unforgiving burn.

How the hell was he doing it, being a father, or at least trying to be? How could he do it right, how could he be expected to be a good dad for him when he barely had any time with his own? How could he?

As if that were not enough, a new revelation overthrew the last. If his father's life was anything to go by, he should have been dead by now as well. Unless he was already living on borrowed time. A whole two years' worth of it.

Erica was better off. Both her parents were still alive. His father's life came to an end early in the war. Hers was now a high-ranking officer in that same war. His mother passed away in a hospital after one-too-many cigarettes. Hers was a trained doctor working in those same hospitals. She was better off than he was, more prepared to be a mother and maybe more a father than he was. They had gotten along without him for this long, hadn't they?

Guilt found a new friend: envy.

Duncan took a sharp breath and hurled the sudden onslaught of thoughts aside, of things he never had to address before now. Nothing was set in stone until he asked.

"Noe, how do you feel about all this?"

"About what?"

Clearing his throat, he ventured further. "About me?"

"...Huh?"

"About me always being away." Duncan took a sizable rock from the top of the berm, eying its cracks and points of erosion. "Away from home, away from your mother," He reeled back his arm. "Away from you."

He tossed the rock as hard as he could. It arced high over the lake. Too high. It shot over a narrower area of water before hitting the nearby bank, barely missing a Moa nest. The momma bird resting there shot to its feet and gave a shrill squawk.

Turning back, he saw Noah staring at him, more confused than anything. They both watched the disturbed Moa return to resting on its eggs.

Silence.

Scratching.

Noah's fingernails ran over the skin on his legs as he hugged them close. His voice creaked out. "I know you can't always be here, dad. I know that." He pulled his knees in. "You have to go keep other kids safe on other worlds like Reach, right? Sometimes I ask mom why you have to be gone all the time and she always tells me that. So, I get it. At least I get to brag about you being an ODST to my friends. But I still wish you could stay home." He stopped to run a finger through the dirt at his feet, tracing out formless shapes in the ground. "Do you think the war will be over soon?"

Duncan could say that. However, what he couldn't say with any measure of certainty was if it would be a victory. Too may worlds had been lost and too many colonists killed, not to mention that the Covenant always seemed to be able to replace the worst of their losses. That question was too high over his head to say anything for sure, but he would be damned if he would ever tell him that.

"Yeah. It'll be over soon."

Noah suddenly lightened up. "How long is soon?"

"I'd say..." The urge to lie was overwhelming. He settled on giving him the most honest answer he could think of. "There's probably two more years left."

Expecting to see Noah's spirits squashed, he was surprised to find him beaming with hope. "Really?"

"Really. Who knows, it might even end in time for me to be there for your birthday next year. Believe me, once this thing's over, I'm going to take you and your mom on a nice, long vacation somewhere. I'll stick around so much that you'll get sick of me. That's the plan anyway."

"...I like it."

"Is that so? Think you can wait that long?"

"It's not that long. I can wait."

Relief washed over his worry-addled mind. Duncan was pleasantly surprised that he had that kind of patience. Then again, his long years spent away likely made two more sound like nothing.

Noah handed him a rock, a flat piece with a good surface area. A greater sense of peace guided his hand. He relaxed, took aim and threw it. They watched the rock sail and bounce intermittently across the lake. He counted nine skips before it sank. A new record.

"Nice!" Noah shouted. "So...do you think...maybe-…"

Duncan noticed his nerves coming back. "What's up?"

"Umm, do you think you could, I don't know, maybe...come home for bring-your-parent to school day? It's when we show the class what jobs our parents do. Since you're an ODST, I thought it'd be cool. Mom does it all the time but I always wanted to ask you."

"I...don't know..."

"Come on, dad. An ODST is way cooler than a 'hotel manager'. Only if you can do it though. I know you're super busy, so..."

"When is it?"

"In a couple months. I don't remember what day it is but, please?"

There was no honest way to answer that Duncan could think of. One of the main reasons he called Noah and Erica to Falchion was because of Garrison. Mere days ago, the colonel had returned from one of those meetings that he couldn't say much about. The most he did was alert the battalion to prepare to remobilize, not saying when or why. A bad sign. There were few times when the colonel was forced to stay radio-silent on them. That alone told them, without telling them much at all, that there was something big on the horizon. It would show in their next deployment orders. Duncan's best move was to bring his family over while he was still on the planet. He couldn't know where he would go or for how long. Whatever he told Noah would have no weight behind it beyond a hopeful guess.

"I'm not sure I can make it but I'll try, kiddo." Duncan bent down next to him. "In fact, if I do make it, I'll try to show up in my armor too. That'll really sell it."

More excitement emanated from Noah, so much so that he leapt up and hugged him. "Thanks, old man."

Duncan wrapped his arm around him. "No problem. And don't call me old man. I'm not that old."

"You're old to me."

"Thanks."

"Maybe everybody else could come too. Uncle Heck, Aunty Sofi, everybody. What do you think?" Noah suddenly let him go, looking shocked. "I almost forgot. Uncle Deaks, that necklace he said he'd make for me. Can we go back to the base? He told me he'd have it ready for me once he got back."

Dread.

A heaviness pinned Duncan in place, pulling his eyes away from his son's.

"What?"

No answer.

"It's ready, isn't it? The necklace? He promised."

Duncan had made a promise too, and he was about to break it. He got up. "Yeah, it's ready. Come, let's head back."

"Oh. Okay."

Noah followed him back up the berm, teaming with anxiousness and anticipation. For Duncan, there was only angst. He was supposed to tell him. That was why they were here, for him to break the news. That was the plan and so far, he had done everything in his power not to follow it.

How could he tell Noah that his uncle wasn't here because he'd been mauled to death? How could he tell him and not have to suffer through the slow, painful comprehension that would dawn on his face. He couldn't. He delayed it, keeping his own expression hidden from the boy as they returned to the Hog, never looking at him on the drive back to Falchion, looking all the while for his lost courage. The courage to tell him.

:*********:

The necklace was stowed away in one of the storage bins beneath Deaks' bunk, and at the opening of the elevator doors, Duncan firmly set his sights on it. Noah shadowed him out onto Epsilon's floor and into the bunks, searching. Those he sought found him and descended on the father and son. They did so slowly at first, carefully gauging the latter's mood. Perhaps at seeing his undimmed excitement, Epsilon, Noah's aunts and uncles, flocked to him from every corner of the room.

"Noah!"

"Welcome back buddy!"

"Hey, mi sobrino, how you been little man?"

Save for the Staff, they all crowded around him in a buzz of happy teasing. Noah giggled as they patted him on the back, ruffled his hair, hugged and joked.

Zack crouched in front of him. "Hey pal, did you grow taller or somethin? I don't remember you being this big."

"Nah Z," Rico said. "You're just an enano, that's all."

"A what?"

"A dwarf." Nova explained. She patted Noah's head, returning his smile. "Hey Noe."

"Hey Aunty Sofi."

"Good to see you're alright."

"Same to you guys. But you always come back so it's okay I guess."

Nova shot a curious glance at Duncan that he pretended not to notice, continuing out towards Deaks' bunk.

"Yeah." She said, less confidently. "We do."

"Always." Noah readily agreed. "Especially since you have a whole samurai with you, right Uncle Mito?"

Mito put his hand to his warmed heart. "Aww. Thanks buddy, but you're only trying to butter me up so you can see my sword again, aren't you?"

Noah nodded unabashedly. "Yup. Can I?"

"Nice try, but sorry, she's staying in the locker for now. Maybe when you're older I can let you hold her."

A cloak of pretended dismay fell over Noah, one that no one in the squad was willing to buy, that is until Yuri stepped in. "Hey-hey, Noe, why long face, huh? Let favorite uncle turn frown right-side up."

Next to him, Renni stood amused. "You mean turn his frown upside down."

"Why must you correct me at worst times?"

"Hey, Uncle Match, Aunty Ren," Noah stuck his fingers into the corner of his lips and drew them into a smile. "See, right-side up?"

A light round of laughter permeated the gathering as Yuri shook his head. "That's not what I mean, Noe. It's not natural. Tell you what, how about I give you ride in Pelican later like last time, huh? Sounds good?"

"We want to turn his frown upside down," Renni protested. "Not his stomach inside out, right Noe?"

But Noah was reaching a finger into his throat. He pretended to dry heave while giving her the thumbs up, earning another round of laughter.

"Sure, dad would be okay with it. We'd have to ask mom though."

"Okay." Yuri turned to a distant part of the room. "Hey mom, how about it?"

There, Erica and the Staff were walking towards them, the latter unreadable, the former less so.

Noah waved. "Hey mom."

He barely got an answer, more of a hushed whisper. "Hey Noe."

"We were talking about going on Pelican together, just me and little tike here for a trip over Csaba." Yuri repeated. "Is that okay, Mama Iris?"

The proposition snapped her out of her malaise. "Umm, I-"

Her son's pleading eyes locked on again.

"We'll figure something out tomorrow, so long as it's safe."

"Come on, do you know pilot safer behind stick than I am?"

"Yeah, literally anyone." Hector huffed as he picked Noah up and hoisted him back onto his shoulder. "Besides, I see what you're trying to do. You're trying to take my place as favorite uncle. Sorry to tell you this Match, but that spot's already taken. Right, Noe?"

Yuri scowled at him. "What you mean taken? Who took it from me? Can't be you."

"Hold on, why're you assuming you were it to begin with?" Zack interjected.

Noah was looking around, jumping from face to face.

"Oh, I forgot to tell you guys." Hector said. "Noe agreed I was his favorite."

"You bribed him with letting him drive, didn't you?" Nova pressed.

"No. I certainly did not. He just said so. Isn't that how it went down, Noe?"

But Noah wasn't paying attention to any of them. He was eyeing the far-off bunks and empty spaces of the floor.

"Noe?" Nova called. "Noe, what's wrong?"

He turned to her, confused. "Where's Uncle Deaks?"

The wider conversation suddenly disappeared. A heaviness made itself felt, its weight coalescing around the bewildered boy on Hector's shoulder. Then it turned inward towards the source, towards Deaks' bed. Duncan was crouched beside it. Having pulled out one of the small bins stashed below, he rummaged through its contents.

He frowned at the newfound silence, knowing he was at the center of it. The squad was coming to understand that the coast was not as clear as they first thought, that he had failed.

Before they could say anything, he spotted the white tip of an envelope and pulled it out. On its side read: 'For Noe, from Uncle Deaks...so you can't say I don't do anything nice for you, little man (Just in case)'.

"Noe." Duncan called. "Come over here. I've got something for you."

He didn't bother turning around to see the disappointed faces taking aim at him. He was content to listen to the footsteps of the whole squad walking up behind him. He heard Hector resting Noah on the floor, the others stepping back to give them some space.

"Dad?"

Duncan bit his lip. Tearing the envelope open, he turned to face them. Noah was standing there, waiting. They all were.

Duncan kneeled down in front of him, noticing the way Noah tracked the thing in his hand. There was confusion behind those green eyes, a clash between his eagerness and the uncertainty of why everyone had gone so quiet.

"You're Uncle Deaks made this for you before we left." Duncan reached in and took it out: a necklace with a dozen Elite teeth stringed onto it. He held it up for Noah, bringing a glint to the young boy's eyes. He pulled it over his head and secured it around his neck. It was just the right fit, not that Duncan expected any less from the 7th's best jeweler.

Noah was grinning from ear to ear, touching the teeth, rubbing their dulled edges between his fingertips. The excitement in his voice was genuine. "It's perfect. It took him forever to finally make me one but I love it."

"You can wear it to school to impress your friends." Duncan said. "Maybe even Emma."

He blushed. Peering at the others, he whispered. "You think so?"

Duncan chuckled. "We'll see."

Slowly the moment's elation soured and Noah started looking around again. Duncan anticipated his question and answered.

"He's not here."

"Why? Where is he? In the bathroom? I can go knock and tell him thanks."

Duncan stared at him, causing the playfulness to cease.

"He's not here, Noe." He repeated and put a hand on his shoulder. "Listen. You're a trooper, right? You're tough, you're strong, and you know it, right?"

Noah's confusion only deepened. "Wha-"

"You're strong. You're tough. So even when things get tough, no matter what, you can take it, right?"

Still unsure, Noah nodded. "Ye-, yeah."

"I need a better answer than that, Noah."

"Yeah, yes."

"That's not enough, kiddo. I need to hear a 'yessir'."

"Yes-, yessir."

"Louder, come on."

Noah stomped his foot. "Yessir!"

"You're tough, right!?"

"Yessir!"

"You're strong, right!?"

"Yessir!"

"You're a trooper, right!?"

"Yessir!"

"No matter what!?"

"Yessir!"

"Good!" Duncan patted his arm, allowing them both to relax until they were once again on the verge of silence. "Good."

The thoughts struggled to come. So too did the way he would need to phrase them. Duncan, unsure of himself, squeezed Noah's shoulder. "So then I can tell you this, right?"

"Tell me what?"

"...Noe, your Uncle Deaks is gone."

"Gone." Noah looked to the others, searching for an explanation. When none yielded themselves up, he turned back to his father. "But...when is he coming back?"

"...That's the problem, Noe. He isn't." Duncan took in a few stabilizing breaths before summoning the words that seemed set to choke him. "On our last mission, he was...killed. We tried to save him but, by the time we got there, it was already too late for him."

On the edge of his periphery, he glimpsed Nova turning away, downcast.

"I'm sorry, Noe. He's gone and he won't ever be coming back. That's it for him." He tapped one of the teeth on the necklace. "He left this behind just for you. He wanted it to be your birthday present. I was supposed to send it to your mom to hold onto it until then. But because of what happened, I think this is the best we could..."

Duncan fell silent at the wet shine in his son's eyes. Noah's lips quivered, chest shaking. All traces of the gift's happiness left him then. The first tear broke loose and streamed down his cheek. It was quickly followed by more as his breathing turned to ragged sniffles. He was ready to break down.

And yet, he didn't.

"...Noe..."

Noah wiped his face with his sleeve, not that he could stop the rest of it from pouring out. "It's okay." He croaked. "I'm fine. I can-" A sob escaped and several more after that, threatening to put him on his knees. Yet sheer force of will cut them short and he once again stood erect, his voice wavering. "I can take it. No matter what, right? I can- I can take it."

Duncan couldn't. He wrapped his son in his arms and held him there, keeping him upright as the dam finally burst and Noah wept.

A few of Duncan's own tears escaped while he held his head, patting his heaving back.

"It's okay." He whispered. "You're a trooper. You can take it. You can take it."

Around him, faces faltered as Epsilon looked on. Their long stares hid grief or remembered it. Erica wasn't spared either. Seeing her son that way proved too much for her, and so did knowing the cause. Nova had to hug her old friend simply to keep her upright as she also cried. The line between family and squad had blurred too greatly over the years for her not to need the help.

Duncan ignored the dampness building on his shoulder and the eyes that watched. He kept a hold of Noah in the hopes of ferrying him through the grief. He could at least be here for him this time, couldn't he?

However, hearing Erica triggered too many memories. Ones of him standing on his front porch, watching his world collapse as his his own mother sat before the two officers, wailing at the sight of his father's holo-projection.

No one had taught him how to comfort others. He had to learn how to do that on his own, just like almost every lesson he could give Noah. In an old part of himself, the part that never grew up, the part that was still six, he wished his own dad had taught him how to do that. However, holding Noah still, he felt the necklace. It made him remember the decades old rock that was always buried in his pants pocket. The gift that never left his side. Maybe that thought was wrong, Duncan wandered. Maybe, he hadn't gotten to teach him much. But maybe, just maybe, he'd taught him enough.

Patrem et Filium - Father and Son