Thanks to lazy anon and Lobster for reviewing.
There's a trigger warning for references to rape.
Disclaimer: I don't own Hetalia.
RusIce: Attack
Emil stumbled into the apartment he shared with his boyfriend. It had taken a long time for him to unlock the door. His hands were trembling too much.
He checked to see if Ivan was there, and when he realised that he wasn't, Emil made his way to the shower. He needed to get rid of the evidence.
He couldn't believe that he had been…
He shook his head, standing underneath the scalding water. He hoped that he could burn the shame away.
And Ivan… what would he do when he learned about what happened to Emil? Would he be disgusted? Would he want nothing more to do with Emil? After all, even if it was against his will, Emil had been unfaithful.
Emil choked on a sob, curling in on himself. No, he couldn't let Ivan know. He couldn't let anyone know.
…
Ivan returned to the apartment with a sigh. He had to deal with too many idiots in his work.
"Emil?" he called out.
There was no answer, and the Russian frowned. Emil should have been back by now. Ivan usually arrived half an hour after the Icelander, but he had been delayed by an hour. He hoped Emil received his message.
He turned on the lights, before he went to the bedroom. He paused at the door, smiling when he saw the lump underneath the covers.
Emil was sound asleep, and Ivan closed the doors so as not to bother him. He went to the kitchen to fix himself a quick dinner, frowning when he couldn't find any evidence of Emil's dinner.
…
Emil was standing in front of the mirror. It was the next morning, and he had locked himself in the bathroom. He needed to check for bruises.
There were a few on his hips and wrists, but the most concerning was the small cut on his throat. He couldn't let anyone see that. He didn't want to have to explain how he had gotten it.
It would seem as though he would be wearing scarves for a while. Luckily, his boyfriend was also fond of scarves, so it wouldn't be too strange.
…
"You were asleep by the time I came home," Ivan said, slicing his sausage. "Is everything okay with work?"
"Work is fine," Emil said, stirring his scrambled eggs. "I was just tired when I came back."
"Well, don't overwork yourself. Oh, what about we do something together on Friday night? Dinner and a movie?"
Emil paused. In truth, a date sounded like fun. It might help him forget about what happened the previous day.
"Sure," Emil said, giving a small smile.
…
Emil was walking to the train station, after which he would then go to work. He turned to the alley and froze.
This was an alley that he usually took as a shortcut. It was safe. Except for the previous day.
Emil trembled upon realising that he had returned to the place where that had happened. He kept seeing the shadows move, and he feared that someone was waiting to pounce on him.
Taking a gulp, Emil turned away and started running away. He could take the long way. No big deal.
…
Ivan frowned as he looked over to Emil. It was Friday morning, and they would have their date that evening. But something had been bothering him all week.
Emil seemed quieter than usual. And he was distant. He didn't seem to want to make eye contact, and when he did, it was very brief. He also didn't appear to be eating enough. And he was usually asleep by the time Ivan returned home.
He wondered if it was stress at work, but there was more. Whenever Ivan would move in to kiss Emil, the smaller male would tense up. And when lying in bed and Ivan would wrap his arm around his boyfriend, Emil would move away.
Hopefully, things would be better that evening. But if not, then he would need to ask Emil about what was going on.
…
Emil found that it was a lot harder to eat his dinner. The movie had been fine, but the dinner didn't want to go down his throat. It felt thick. And Emil's jaw didn't seem to want to work.
Ivan was watching him, and Emil forced himself to swallow the mouthful. The restaurant was pretty expensive. Not a four-star place, but also not a takeout place. And Emil didn't want to seem ungrateful.
His eyes widened and he tensed when Ivan placed his hand on his forehead. It was rare for Ivan not to wear gloves. He swallowed nervously.
"Are you feeling alright?" Ivan asked. "Are you sick?"
"W-what makes you think that?" Emil asked.
"You've been acting strangely all week. You're wearing a scarf, you're not eating properly, and you don't want me to touch you."
Emil felt his stomach drop. Was Ivan suspicious?
"Can we… Can we not talk about it here?" Emil asked.
Ivan frowned, but nodded his head. The two finished their dinner, and Ivan drove them home.
As soon as they arrived home, Emil could feel Ivan's eyes on him. He didn't want to look at him. He didn't want Ivan to see the guilt and the shame.
"…Is there someone else?" Ivan asked.
"What?!" Emil exclaimed, spinning around. "Why would you think that?"
"Because you pull away when I try to hug you, and you freeze when I kiss you. Have you… done something with someone else?"
"No! I… I mean… I didn't want it! It was rape!"
Ivan's eyes widened, and Emil clamped his hands on his mouth.
"What?" Ivan asked.
Emil lowered his eyes, tears pricking the corners.
"It was… that alley that leads to the train station," Emil said. "Someone tackled me, and he… He held a knife to my throat. Told me that… that if I made a sound, he'd kill me. I was so scared. And then he…"
Emil clenched his eyes shut, the attack replaying behind his eyelids. He gasped when he felt warm arms embrace him, and his eyes trailed upwards, seeing Ivan's furious expression.
"What did he look like?" Ivan asked, his voice dripping with venom. "Please, describe him to me."
Emil did so, and he felt Ivan's hand running through his hair while the other rubbed circles on his back. It felt soothing. Comforting.
When Emil was finished, he was a crying mess, but Ivan didn't let go.
"I'm so sorry that you had to suffer through that," Ivan whispered. "Why didn't you tell me?"
Emil shook his head.
"I was afraid," Emil said. "And ashamed. And guilty…"
"You had nothing to be guilty about," Ivan said. "The one who should feel shame is the monster that did this to you."
Emil burst into sobs as Ivan held him tighter.
…
Ivan was stroking Emil's hair. The smaller male had fallen asleep, still crying. He was exhausted, and Ivan couldn't blame him. He had a large burden to bear.
Carefully, Ivan separated himself from Emil and grabbed his phone, closing the door behind him. He didn't want Emil to wake up and hear the conversation that would follow.
He had never told Emil that he had contacts in the underworld. The Icelander was too sweet and innocent for that world. But someone had threatened that innocence, and Ivan had to make him pay.
"I need you to deal with someone," Ivan said into the phone. "A rapist."
"…Gladly."
…
That Monday, when Emil was browsing through the newspaper, he came upon an article of someone that was apparently executed by the mob. There was a picture of the victim, and he froze.
"It's him," Emil whispered.
Ivan heard him, and came over to peer over his shoulder. Ivan smiled.
"It seems like he angered the wrong person," Ivan said.
Emil closed the newspaper.
"Good riddance," he snapped.
The prompt is: 'Imagine that Person A gets attacked and raped. They're afraid to tell anyone, so they keep quiet. However, Person B (and Person C if OT3) notices their strange behavior and begins to worry. When they finally get Person A to talk, they become furious that someone would hurt their love and ask for a description of the attacker. Do they get revenge? Do they call the police? The rest of the story is up to you–but make sure that Person A is comforted and cared for.'
The other day, I ended up on Wikipedia's page for rape culture. Imagine my disgust when I saw that my country not only has its own section, but its own subsections. I knew it was bad, but seriously… To give you an idea on how bad it is: statistically speaking, there's a rape happening every three seconds in South Africa.
Anyway, I would have held off on this chapter for a while, but the timing is perfect. It's currently 'women's month' in South Africa, with National Women's Day being 9 August. It started out as a day celebrating women participating in a silent protest during Apartheid, but has become a day to rally against violence against women. Including rape. This chapter ties in with that, as well as my statement that these things aren't gender exclusive. And these things are not the victim's fault. If anyone should be ashamed of something like this happening, then it should be the perpetrator feeling shame.
