️ ️The sky was blue but, why were the clouds white?
The fact that the clouds were so clear was perfect, if the clouds had been pink or green, the sky wouldn't have been so beautiful.

There has always been a scientific answer to every atmospheric or sensory question, why was every answer always known?

And if every answer was known why didn't Sanji know the answers to his question? Why think about clouds when you could think about the sun? They were both fabulous and full of meaning and explanation, but then why?

Why was his sky never blue?

When the sky was blue, the clouds were usually white because they were composed of ice crystals that reflected light; but then why were the clouds before Sanji not white?

White meant purity, innocence, was that perhaps why Sanji was so fascinated by it?

White, what was white? Just one color, a million sensations?

The white sound was a kind of invisible shield, a barrier for noises from the outside, which remained hidden by the repetitiveness and monotony of a single sound.

Zoro was not the white but the white sound, snoring as he slept, so loud that it cancelled out all surrounding sounds. He took the cigarette out of his mouth, holding it tightly between two fingers, he was leaning against the window sill that showed the dark sky outside, decorated with black clouds, so dark that they were not noticeable.

Why were the clouds black? The answer was simple, because of the sky. Once the multitude of drops began to descend, the clouds immediately changed their appearance, becoming less dense, which allowed light to penetrate more easily; making the clouds dark.

Was this perhaps Zoro? When sadness and anger raged, his appearance changed, he became vulnerable and more sensitive.
Why had the dark sky reminded him of Zoro? He admired his sleepless face, saliva was pouring out of his mouth, the sheets were so messed up that the material of the mattress could be seen.

Yet it was a perfect picture to hang on the walls of his mind.

He released the black tobacco smoke, it danced between the soft pink lips, blending with the dark sky, "it's raining today."

He brought the cigarette between his lips, the bitter taste of tobacco in contact with the sweet peach balm gave off confusing smells, how could something so sour come into contact with something so sweet?

What was the right definition?

He took the last drag from his cigarette before putting it out in the ashtray. Around him, in the large room he shared with two people, sometimes even three; there were still the smells of the night spent between emotions and madness, between love and pain, between suffering and sadness. The room was decorated with two simple beds, one double and one bunk; a white marble closet and two chests of drawers of the same material; a window with a sill on which rested a vase of flowers, sunflowers because they indicated cheerfulness, light and life and that was just what Sanji needed.

Right next to that vase, with spirals and other plant patterns engraved on it, was placed an ashtray filled with cigarette butts, so many that you could hardly count them on your fingers. Were those cigarettes Sanji's release? Or was it the man lying on his bed shirtless?

He grabbed the nearly empty pack of cigarettes and took yet another piece of nicotine, which had been damaging his body for years, injuring him from the inside. He placed the poison between his lips and lit it using the usual gold lighter with a woman crouched over herself engraved on it.

He inhaled the tobacco, allowing the weapon to enter his body until it reached his lungs and released inside them. But then he thought back to Ace's words, he had told him to avoid smoking because it damaged his body, should he listen to him? Was he supposed to modify himself to please him?

Does a person who loves you want to change you?

A small memory returned to his mind, a short time ago there was another person who accused him of smoking too much since his smoke fouled the air around her. At that time only one person defended him, he did not want to remember but that person was Zoro.

(FLASHBACK)

"Do you think I smoke too much?" He rested his chin on the green man's shoulder, he did not turn toward him but continued to drink the sake in his hands. The smoke had already entered his lungs as soon as Sanji approached. He did not answer him, just smiled and continued drinking.

Zoro was the last person to ask, he didn't care if he died, he wanted to enjoy life as long as he could. Certainly his lover's smoke did not bother him, "cook, do you think I drink too much?"

He looked at him with a smiling face, at that point Sanji answered him sincerely, "yes, you drink too much."

But Zoro's answer was totally far from his thinking, so much that he was surprised, "ah yeah? I don't care."

That was the answer to all questions.

(FLASHBACK END)

Zoro was right, it was useless to create problems that had no meaning to exist. It was at that very moment that fate would have it, he received a message from his lovely Ace, you could say it had been a month now, they saw each other almost every day but something was not right.

Nothing changed, Sanji kept going back to Zoro as if it was his comfort zone. Why wasn't he going to Ace? Why hadn't he been able to exchange a loving gesture with that boy yet? What did he miss?

What did Zoro have that he was missing?

The message was pretty clear, "I think you would look pretty good without a beard, could you wear the clothes I gave you tomorrow? Then you will look more elegant and charming."

At that moment a thought departed from his mind, like a plane beginning to take off to fly to a destination he did not yet know. Why was Ace saying those things to him? Why was he trying to change him? Was it the right thing to do?

Was he supposed to shave? Cut his hair? Dress in a more, how should I say, masculine way?

It sounded like a speech prepared and sent by his father.

He immediately erased any selfish and undermining thoughts and reflected a few seconds on himself.
He wanted to win Ace over so he had to please him?

It was Zoro who interrupted his thoughts, yawning so soundly that it made him jump on the spot. He squared him from head to toe, "What is it?"He asked simply, the blond man shrugged his shoulders and walked over to him, after putting down his cigarette.

He made their mouths meet, letting the smoke also enter the green man's throat, who grabbed his neck and pulled him toward himself to deepen the kiss. It was a violent, almost poisonous kiss: their tongues danced hidden by a cloud of smoke, leaking from their lips as if trying to escape but failing. He yawned after pulling away from the kiss, that little bit relieved the other's mood in an instant.

He gently caressed the blond hair strands that decorated his head, moving them back slightly to get a better look at him.

He wasn't romantic, he wasn't sweet, he wasn't cute or handsome; he was boring, he only washed when he wanted to and he only ever had Sanji's smell on him, whether it was smoke or peach balm, he didn't care about anything or anyone and he did what he wanted when he wanted to. Why did such a person when he caressed him, touched him or even kissed him, make him feel that way? Why did it make his heart beat? Why did the rough, calloused hands from his hard work feel so good when they were in contact with his body?

What did Zoro have that the others did not?

The dark, gloomy eyes of the green penetrated the light, deep eyes of the blond, he looked at him without speaking, yet he seemed to be saying a million words. Were his eyes the language of his emotions?

He looked at him so deeply as if he was entering him, with his eyes he could translate the beats of his heart into verses of love.

"Your hair has grown," he pointed out, as he tried to tie it back in some way that only he knew. Was his hair too long to belong to a man? Should he have cut it? Should he have dyed it? Where to change it?

He moved Zoro's hand and sighed, "I will cut it."

Green looked at him in silence, sticking his little finger in his ear in confusion, "If it grows too long I will look like a woman."

"So what?" He got out of bed to walk toward the bathroom, his urine bladder ready to burst. "Zoro, wait!"

He grabbed his hand, at that moment he needed his support, his approval, something, he wanted something from his partner; something he didn't know he wanted.

"Should I cut them off?" At that point the questions began, he asked them to Zoro as if he were asking them to himself, "I have to pee."

He walked away from the room but was followed to the bathroom, "I'm serious."

"I'm not your mother, I don't care about your hair." He released yet another yawn, that answer wasn't enough to satisfy the blond, he wanted to hear words from Zoro that he probably could never hear. Why?

Why wasn't Zoro that kind of person?

No. Because Zoro was no one, he was just his comrade. So why did he want to hear it from him specifically and not from someone else?

"If I shave my beard? That might be good, so I don't poke you." He tried a third time, but the green man lifted his pants and walked over to the sink where he was leaning. He walked up to his face, observed every tiny detail of his pale skin, as delicate as a woman's. He admired his bright blue eyes, even his eyelashes were too long to belong to a boy. His already rosy and thick lips were always covered with a balm that, made them shinier and more delicious in Zoro's eyes.

If he stared at him too much he risked it and didn't want to answer his stupid questions, because that's what he thought of him, "he's just having useless and stupid thoughts."

He kissed his neck, reaching all the way under his ear, over which he slid his tongue, "wh-what are you doing-"

Just at that instant the tongue returned to his neck, passing over the Adam's apple reached his beard; the tongue slid over his chin to above his lips, which he kissed removing the peach flavor he had stored on top.

He left the room, leaving him there once again with a lot of thoughts.

What was the point of asking Zoro those things? He didn't care, Sanji could do anything, it wasn't his problem. He would love him for better or worse, even if he exterminated the human race. After all, the feelings were his, not Sanji's.

He was not sure it was a good idea to invite Ace but his friends, indeed his family, wanted to get to know him better.

"I need to get to know the person to who I'm lending my brother!" Nami put her hands on her hips and looked at Sanji, "You are exaggerating and we are not together yet, lend who?"

Usopp added to the conversation by adding his own thought, "Zoro will surely be jealous!" Sanji brought a hand to his forehead in exasperation, green did not care who the cook was dating.

As soon as the doorbell rang, Nami and Usopp stood at attention, Robin and Chopper were sitting on the sofa while Zoro was sleeping on the floor, his head resting on the wall.

He wasn't sleeping, he was just resting his eyes: as he always said to justify himself.

It was Ace.

It was Ace.

It was Nami who opened the door, looked down at him and then ran off with Usopp, "he's hot!" She shouted under her breath, "what are you talking about, Zoro is cooler and has a bigger chest."

Nami hit his head with her fist, "what's the point of having such a big chest if it can't be useful?"

"Does he even have more muscles?" Usopp tried to save the day, "Sanji doesn't need that!"

"Maybe this Ace can cook?" He hit him with a second punch, "you're a moron, we have to do something!"

"Ace?" He sighed, it was useless to devise plans with Usopp, he always came up with the stupidest ideas.

Sanji introduced the man as his future lover, the only one who greeted politely was Robin.

"Ace chan~~ meet the little one of the house~" the younger man stepped forward, Ace greeted him with a big smile and offered him strawberry candy.

Needless to say, he stayed for dinner as well.

"It didn't work." Whispered Usopp, the woman companion looked at him confused, "what did you do?"

"I put chili on his plate however he is not having any reaction," he bit his nails as he looked at the brunette, "maybe he is dying internally?"

Rufy, who was sitting next to them, watched them in silence, "Usopp give me your hand."

He closed his eyelids more than five times to try to understand what his friend meant, but handed it to him anyway. He vomited onto the palm of his hand the food he had just eaten, "it's super spicy, my tongue is on fire!"

They both stood up sharply, Rufy started running back and forth looking for water, until Zoro caught him and put his head under the water faucet, then gave everyone the victory symbol.

"Why did you do that on my hand!" He ran into the bathroom, "apparently he hadn't put Ace on the chili." Nami huffed but then an idea occurred to her.

"Your name is Ace, right?" The dark-haired man nodded, "you are Nami? You are very famous in school."

Nami was one of the most beautiful girls in the entire university, she was also an excellent student and therefore acclaimed by all, in fact she competed for the representative position with him.

"Why are you hanging around my friend? Haven't you wondered if by any chance he is already taken?"

Sanji glared at her making her symbol to shut up but the other replied anyway, "He was the one who hit on me, so I assumed he was single."

"Not all opened sake bottles are empty." Zoro added, taking a sip, "do you also drink at lunch?"

"Dinner and breakfast," Sanji replied, realizing only later that he had answered instead of green automatically.

Zoro's sentence was simple and stupid but could mean so many things, he wrapped an arm around Sanji's shoulder and pulled him toward himself, making his back touch against his chest. The blond man's face dyed red, "Get off."

He tried to move but the grip was too strong, "yet last night you didn't seem to mind being on top of me," he whispered in his ear so that only he could hear.

At that point he was forced to get up and take him with him into the kitchen.

"Are you stupid? What are you thinking? Saying those things in front of Ace." He yelled after closing the folding door. Zoro smiled, "Since when are you my mother?"

He obviously just wanted to tease him, Sanji telling him far too many times what to do and what not to do.

"I'm your... friend! So you have to listen to me." Zoro, who was leaning against the counter with his arms folded, looked at him without a word. He smiled, slowly approaching him, "From what I remember friends don't suck your cock."

He inserted his hand into his pants, squeezing his butt, his teeth immediately went to grip the skin of his neck, "Zo- Zoro stop it," he tried to push him away but his body was far too slender compared to the tan one.

"Zoro please-" he whispered, not wanting him to stop touching him but in the other room, inches from them were all the others; the door was the only thing separating the two areas.

He hit him with his foot; his face was red and angry, between the embarrassment and anger on his face.

"Don't touch me." He pushed him away, hitting his chest but the other did not want to know about letting go, "This attitude of yours only increases my desire to fuck you so hard that I'll break your back, so you'll depend on me for life."

He was out of breath and his pulse was racing; he was angry, not at Sanji but at himself because he could do nothing to change things.

Perhaps he had had too much to drink or perhaps it was not the right time to speak, he simply had not said the right words.

Sanji hit his cheek with his hand, the contact made a high, painful sound, not so much because of the reddened skin after the hit but the reason, the reason why it had happened. The times when Zoro could not control his emotions were becoming more and more frequent, it was time to end it, "Zoro, I think it's time to end it here."

"End what?"

Right, end what? How could you give an end to something that had never existed?

"I want to be serious with Ace, you know what I mean." Green leaned against the counter and lowered his gaze to his shoes, "do whatever you want."

The moment had come, the moment Zoro hoped would never come. After all, he had done well to release his violent emotions, for this only encouraged the other to make a decision, and he could not stop him from doing so.

From that time Ace was invited to their house several times, Sanji went out with him very often, and he did not always stay at home with his so-called 'family.' He was treated well but was also pushed away from his friends, the problem was that he did not realize it at all.

"I'm starving! Food! Food! SANJII! FOOD!" Rufy began shouting throughout the house, silent only when Nami replied, "he's sleeping over at Ace's, he's not here tonight."

He looked at his space, at the stove, at the counter, the kitchen was totally clean and shiny despite not having been used for a few days, the reason was only one: Zoro, he kept cleaning it so that when he returned he could cook on a great station.

"But I'm hungry!" He whimpered, rolling over. "Calm down Rufy, I'll make you something now," she tried to comfort him. Usopp's groans could be heard from the living room, "Nami you cook roast chicken every day, please stop."

"That's the only thing I know how to cook, help yourself." She glared at him, "I was right, that Ace stole our cook."

Nami had collected a lot of money in the meantime, "no matter how kind that man is to Sanji there is definitely something wrong, Sanji never goes away all this time."

"You're right, it's been two days and I feel like I'm dying!" Usopp pretended to faint, letting himself fall onto the sofa.

"Tonight, Zoro is cooking! It's his fault Sanji left."

"Don't give me orders." He ignored her, "Get off your ass!" She pulled at his nose, forcing him to get up.

He was forced to go to the kitchen, the refrigerator was always full of all kinds of vegetables, greens, spices and everything else but he didn't know what to get.

He stared at the inside for a few seconds, grabbed the fish and three knives so it would be faster to cut it.

Raw fish was the best choice, quick and easy.

"At least we ate something different." The blond man's absence was felt more and more every day and he returned only a few days later, undisturbed as if nothing had happened at all.

"Cook," it was Zoro himself who welcomed him that day, tried to avoid him but it was useless, "we need to talk."

Sanji stepped back a little, any closeness to green was dangerous, their bodies had not touched in days, and a kind of loneliness could be felt.

Zoro was not used to saying that kind of thing but at that moment it was necessary, he was the only one who could make him see reason, "stop running away from me."

"I'm not running away, I'm just spending time with my future boyfriend." He quickly replied, "you're not going home and avoiding everyone, have you forgotten your family? Or now that Ace is around, aren't they more important?"

Green's words had hit the mark, he remained silent listening to him, "you said it's over, but what's the point of avoiding me and others? Come back home."

Sanji swallowed the saliva, looking at the man in front of him, he didn't know what to say, "we're done having sex not caring for each other, shit cook."

He pulled him into his arms, he needed to touch him even for a second, a little touch was enough to make him feel better. He didn't know how much it had hurt Sanji to be away from him just to keep him safe from his feelings, he dropped the duffle bag on the ground and squeezed the fabric of his shirt tightly, "I missed you so much."

He could not hold back his tears, "please don't be angry with me anymore." Zoro stroked his hair, holding him as close to himself as he could, his eyes tearing as he wet the t-shirt.

"Cook, don't go away."

At that moment he wanted to kiss him so badly that to repress the desire he bit his lower lip, Sanji was no longer his and he could not take him back, but he could stay close to him as he had always done even if it meant deluding himself.

EXTRA ️

He gazed at Zoro's body in silence, admiring his muscles and collarbone well highlighted by his shirt-it was his shirt but in green it fit divinely. They had stopped having sex and kissing, but not expressing their affection for each other. Sanji in particular could not keep his feelings in check because yes, he had realized that there was something there.

He had feelings for Zoro, he knew it and was sure of it but Zoro was part of his family; moreover, he would never find someone like Ace.

Zoro's feelings were different from his own, aggressive and passionate, perhaps carnal while Ace seemed to be custom-made for him.

Yet something was not right, there was something that kept torturing him but he would probably never understand what.

"Zoro," he called out to him, the other replied with a simple 'mh,' he was busy cutting salmon into slices as he asked, and he was very good with knives.

"You look hot in my shirt," for a moment he regretted saying that, but it had been hours since that thought and he could no longer hold it in. He couldn't hold back his feelings let alone words.

He had never noticed how handsome and charming his almost friend was, he had always given more importance to his surroundings outside the house, just seeing a boy and immediately falling at his feet, especially if the guy was charming.

But with Zoro it was different, all his shades were erased until he showed his true self. The self that is not afraid to smoke ten cigarettes a day, the self that is not afraid to say what he feels.

Zoro made him real and not a hideous copy of the real self. He put every layer of film together until he made the perfect movie, and Sanji was the most beautiful movie he had ever seen in his entire life.

Who was Zoro to Sanji? If he really had feelings for him, couldn't he just eliminate his surroundings? Why wasn't he doing that? What did he need to get, to know, to feel?

What did he really want from Zoro?

"Where did you put my sake?" He asked, ignoring the compliment he had just received. Sanji sighed; he could not be so stupid as to miss his gesture. "In my underwear."

Zoro raised an eyebrow and walked over to him to lower his pants, "I'm kidding stupid."

He giggled, letting him hold his waist, "Me? What about you? By teasing me what do you hope to get?"

He wrapped his arms around his neck, even though Zoro tried to pull him away it didn't work; after all, he didn't want to pull away either.

"Say something nice to me and I'll give you sake." Over and over again he had tried to kick out Zoro's soft side but he did not always succeed, most of the time it was just failure. He certainly could not expect anything from him, not after telling him what he thought of Ace.

Now he felt like a fool, he had told him he was serious about Ace but wanted to receive affection from him, wanted to show him feelings that made no sense to exist.

Yes, he was doing it wrong again. He was again treating his friend as something he was not, Zoro did not want to change Sanji, but he was trying to change Zoro.

"Something nice?" He stuck his finger up his nose, trying to remove a booger that was disturbing one of his nostrils, Sanji continued to look at him with bright eyes, waiting for an answer.

"Dickhead?" He threw the booger, "Ew, someone threw a booger at me!" He went to wipe his face Usopp.

"Dickhead is not a cute term, it must be a sweet and cute adjective that could pertain to my face, for example." Zoro watched his face, anxiously waiting for a response.

"Beautiful curled eyebrows?" He tapped his forehead, "You're an idiot."

Zoro watched him leave the room, the blond man was acting strange and he didn't understand why. "Really?"

Usopp looked at him shocked, "what?"

"You were supposed to be sweet," he hit his arm and posed, kneeling before him, "you were supposed to say, my sweet prince you are so charming, your sunny beauty lights up my soul, my black heart is colored white by your smile ."

"All that's missing is the white horse," Nami added, climbing on his shoulders, "go my brave soldier, let's go rescue Princess Sanjita."

"Sanjita? Who is she? Sanji's sister?" Rufy popped up behind Zoro's shoulders, who walked behind the blond man.

"Where's the sake?"