Notes - I was shocked to see that people still read this fic over here on Fanfiction so I decided to update it to the current chapter releases from over on AO3. I do recommended reading it over if you want to keep up as I updated more regularly with better notes and less format issues.
In the early hours of the morning, unseen in a back alley, something fell from the sky.
"Ow!" Screamed the 'something' as they landed head-first into a garbage bin. After several minutes of muttering and unknowable curses, the "object" crawled out and onto the street.
"Ooff, that took longer than it should have," the being was finally able to examine themselves, "Oh come on, are you #& $?/!*& serious?" Their eyes widened in horror at the odd sounds they made at the end of their sentence.
"Wait, you &%*! deny me even my swearing!" They screamed to the heavens while shaking their small fist, "You all can bet I'll burn you old farts good when I'm back!"
After yelling several more indiscernible words at the sky, they gave up due to the silent treatment they got back. They sighed, "Now how much do I remember how these streets went…" they glumly noted.
It was then that a paper map drifted down from the air onto the head of the being.
"Oh, real wise guys are y'all?" They remarked, "Guess I'll take what I can get at this point."
They took the map and began to examine it. "Now where is Furinkan High School? My champion awaits~"
Little did they know, but the street over, a lost boy was also looking for the same school.
Nabiki did not have a pleasant sleep and her wake-up was somehow even worse.
"Good morning, Tendo Nabiki," Kuno Takewaki said sitting on his knees outside her room's door which she had just opened.
After rubbing her eyes and confirming the sight before her, she said, "Kuno, what the hell are you doing outside my door?"
"Ah, I am here waiting for you to wake up and for us to begin our training.
"Training in how to be a lunatic?"
Kuno chuckled, "Perhaps my family and I would be suited to such a task. But no, I am here to train you in the art of the blade and I must say if this is your usual wake-up time, we will have to adjust it to earlier in the day if we wish to make any progress."
"You're going to drive me insane either way Kuno I swear," Nabiki rubbed her head, "How did you even get in?"
"Your older sister let me in once I explained the situation. What polite woman she has become, although perhaps too accepting of things."
"You don't say?"
Kuno stood, "Come, it would be best if we began before breakfast. The food will taste all so better afterwards."
"Kuno, I…" Nabiki clenched her fist, "I need to use the washroom first."
"My apologies, I will be waiting in your yard," Kuno turned and began to walk down the stairs.
'Idiot, time to hop out the window and avoid dealing with this bullshit'Nabiki smirked, turning to her room and began to think about where to grab a coffee on her way to school.
"Oh!" Takewaki's head popped up from the staircase, "I nearly had forgotten, but I was recommended to mention, in case you plan on being difficult, the following numbers; 712812."
Nabiki's face fell in horror.
"That is all," his head disappeared back down the stairs.
'Shit…'Nabiki was defeated.
After taking care of her necessities, Nabiki walked down into the living room where she saw Kuno reading some papers in the yard.
"Sis, what the hell is Kuno doing at our house?" her younger sister asked as she descended the stairs.
"Kuno's here?" Ranma asked right behind her.
Nabiki sighed, "Apparently he's going to be training me in sword fighting."
"Oh that probably be a good idea," commented Anko sitting at the breakfast table, cup of coffee in hand, "Nerima can be a dangerous place, knowing even the basics of fighting could save your life in a bad situation."
"I can protect her if something happens!" Akane countered.
"And I can actually save her butt if something happens," Ranma added, but only received a glare from his fiancee, "Not that she'd need anyways. Nabiki's scary."
"But Nabiki is often dealing more dangerous trades and you two are certainly not going to be around all the time," Anko countered.
"Mhhh," the senior Tendo was having difficulty on who to support when the nearby TV station announced.
"Six more bodies have been found near the Nerima supermarket Yenarama yesterday evening, the culprit is suspected to be the infamous White Devil-"
"Nabiki, you are going to practise and that's final!" her father declared.
'Which ironic considering it's that same dangerous woman that apparently wants me to train…'Nabiki sighed.
'How ironic since they're the same person.'Anko snickered to herself.
"I think it would be good for Nabiki, she used to enjoy practising martial arts so much when she was little," Kasumi added.
'Well, that makes it final I guess, thanks, sis.'
"Good morning Tendo Akane, and salutations Saotome Ranma," Kuno lightly waved from across the pond, "Tendo Nabiki, are you ready to begin?"
"Yes, Kuno-baby," Nabiki sighed again, "Why couldn't it be a sane person training me at least?"
Ranma and Akane watched as Nabiki approached Takewaki and began basic training, which correctly began with body warm-ups, with unease.
"Kuno is actually training her…" Akane was partially horrified, partially amused at her sister's just desserts coming, "Wonder why."
"Who knows?" Ranma put his hands behind his head and began to walk towards the yard himself, "That idiot doesn't need much to inspire him."
"Where are you going?"
"I'm going to practise without a panda smashing into me for once," Ranma hopped down, "Besides, keeping an eye on those two couldn't hurt."
"Did you chain your dad up again?"
Ranma began to whistle as he started his kata. Akane couldn't help but shrug, finding herself a spot at the breakfast table where her father read his paper and Anko…'What is she doing?'
Anko had a stack of old papers with a map of her household in hand. Whatever it was, it was clearly giving the woman difficulties.
"What are you doing?" she asked.
Anko looked up at Akane, "Huh? Oh, I'm trying to figure out where an artifact was buried."
"An artifact?" Both Akane's and her father's attention were caught now.
"Yeah, do you know about the legend of Nerima's demon?"
Akane nodded while her father pondered, "Yeah, actually learned about it for the first time yesterday in school."
"Huh convenient," Anko commented.
"You don't know about it, Dad?" Akane asked.
"Uh well, I recall something about there being an old demon and the Tendo family being involved but I never took much interest. The history of our family is passed down through matriarchy while the dojo is passed down by male heirs. Your… mother was quite invested in it…"
"Oh…" the mood was turning dour.
"Well that actually explains some things," Anko continued, "I'm looking for your ancestor's weapon which is said to have been buried somewhere here."
"Why the interest?" the senior Tendo asked.
"I'm a journalist and sometimes that means literally digging stuff up," Anko shrugged, "Plus, let's just say I have a hunch it could be useful in the future."
"Super martial artists, sorcerers, and now demons, when will my life become normal again," Akane sighed.
"Somehow I doubt it will ever be normal, apologies miss Tendo," Anko tipped her hat, "Once Pandora's box has been opened there's no shutting it."
The roar of a panda drew people's attention to the yard.
"Ah come on pops it wasn't that bad," Ranma said before his father performed an excellent diving kick that caught Ranma off guard while he was in the middle of his kata. Unsurprisingly, Ranma's trajectory was the poor koi pond. A splash and a few bubbles later, a red-headed Ranma popped up from the pond.
"What sorcery is this?!" Decried Kuno.
"Huh?" Everyone else collectively let out. Kuno rushed towards the pond, looking all around before staring at his beloved pig-tailed girl. He did not overall leap for her as expected, instead staring at Ranma in shock.
"Could it be… you are one and the same?"
"Kuno-baby, you've seen Ranma change before your eyes dozens of times before, hell you've held him while he changed and refused to believe his curse. What's with the sudden increase in your intelligence?"
"Curse?" He looked at Nabiki.
"Got it in China, cold water makes me into a girl and hot water makes me a guy. Make any sense to ya?" Ranma got out of the pond and poked Takewaki on his forehead.
"This… this whole time?" His face began to drip with sweat.
"Yup,"
"But which is the real you?"
"Isn't it obvious?!"
"No? You have displayed an affinity for both men's and women's fashion, and as much as I can clearly recall, have no visible preference for form. If you are suggesting I deduce by your mannerisms and alike, I shan't, for basing your gender solely by personality is old-fashioned at best." Said the man wearing a yukata, "What makes one a man, woman or otherwise tis based on one's own disposition on the matter rather than society's binary gender norms or its crude understanding of human biology."
Silence befell his audience save for one notable exception.
"Damn right!" Anko cheered, "Here here for progressive Kuno!"
Akane was the first to find her voice.
"Kuno, what… what brought this on?"
"Ah, my… psychiatrist has been helping me reevaluate my understanding of the world, which includes gender. Still, sorcery, curses and alike are truly real and not a fabrication of the mind…" Kuno looked up to the sky, "I… must depart. I need to rethink…" he looked at Ranma, "many things, most critically my own memory." Takewaki turned to Nabiki, "I must cut our training session short, my sincere apologies." He then looked back at Akane and Ranma and bowed, "I… am sorry."
He then proceeded to sprint out of the yard.
-…what just happened?- Genma signed.
"That, my friends, is the wonder of proper medications," Anko remarked.
"Whatever do you mean Anko?" Kasumi asked.
"Well, technically it's not medication in this case but our dear Kuno had some unfortunate mental illnesses as I'm sure you're all aware. I gave him a jab the other day at a few pressure points so his brain would start, well… functioning normally. It's basically what proper medicine would do for him, balancing out some chemicals in the brain and whatnot. Obviously, it's starting to have an effect."
"But… why?" Akane asked.
"Eh, he was annoying and so far, this much better, won't you all agree?"
The local residents couldn't argue against that, but Nabiki shared a thought many were having.
"Better for now, but a sane Kuno sounds terrifying all the same."
For the household's two youngest residents, an additional puzzle was being worked at.
'What did he mean that gender is decided by oneself?'
Lunch at school was a surprisingly quiet affair. Ranma had wandered off to do more violin practice. Ukyo was absent that morning like yesterday. Kuno was still off having a mental breakdown no doubt. Shampoo was also missing in action. Sayuri and Yuka had club stuff to take care of. Daisuke and Hiroshi left the scene soon as they realized Ranma wasn't around. This left Akane alone sitting on the rooftop.
"Sigh, who knew you could get used to noisiness?" She said to herself.
"In Nerima, being accustomed to noise is essential for survival," a voice said behind her.
Akane turned and was surprised to see Kodachi of all people, standing there in her school uniform with her bento in hand.
"Kodachi?! What are you doing here?" Akane questioned, "Ranma isn't even here."
"I… I am aware. I was wondering if I could join you for lunch?" Kodachi seemed different. Is she actually shy?
"Uh sure, as long you don't try to poison me or anything,"
Kodachi smiled, "I would not dream of it!" She replied eagerly.
The noble girl took a spot surprisingly close to Akane, just a foot apart, before she opened her lunchbox and began to eat. It looked good, unlike Akane's who made her own this morning as part of her lessons. She slowly realized that going hungry might be a better alternative.
"Are you not hungry?" Kodachi asked.
"I… I think might have made my sushi with incorrect ingredients," Akane admitted as a sushi roll rolled itself around her tray.
"Well I think it looks interesting, shall we swap?" Kodachi offered, which visibly shocked Akane.
"Oh, I assure you my food isn't poisoned. I haven't practised poison immunization for a few years now."
"Uh, that's not it," Akane tightened her grip on her lunch box, "I'm embarrassed to say but my food is known to be… upsetting to many peoples' bodies."
"Well as I said, I used to consume small doses of poison for several years. I can certainly handle more than most. May we?" Kodachi offered her lunchbox. Akane hesitantly swapped her food with her.
"Thank you for the meal," Kodachi said before eating. If she had any complaints, Kodachi didn't vocalize them or express any displeasure. Almost seemed like she was enjoying it. Akane decided to try her new food and was pleasantly surprised at how good it was. It wasn't Kasumi's level, but that was a level few mortals reached.
"This is excellent!" Akane proclaimed.
"Why thank you! I made it myself, using some fresh fruits and vegetables from my garden," Kodachi was surprisingly able to produce a sweet smile when she wanted to, Akane thought to herself.
"It's great, thank you," Akane reiterated.
"My pleasure, you are a very kind woman Tendo Akane," she remarked.
Both went back to their meals, but a question would not leave Akane's mind. Within a few minutes, it was too much and she put her chopsticks down.
"Kodachi… why did you come to our school to have lunch for me?"
Kodachi paused before putting her own utensils down, "It's fair to ask. I, as I said yesterday, have gained new clarity. To be blunt, I was discovered to be suffering from a few mental illnesses and my new medication has put my life into a new perspective. I was a mad woman, and because of that, I discovered I didn't have a normal life waiting for me when I returned to school. To everyone there, I am either someone to be feared, followed or challenged. There isn't room anymore for a sane Kodachi." Kodachi looked up to the sky, "I could hardly stand it yesterday and today I was dreading the thought of returning to it. I then thought back to my encounter with you yesterday and… there are some other things going on that may seem ridiculous but I felt compelled either way to visit you. After all, with my ribbon, your school is only a few minutes away. It was certainly worth it to me to find some normalcy."
"A normal life is a dream around here huh?" Akane remarked. She almost left it at that, but Kodachi's expression suggested that Akane continued.
"Every day I'm surrounded by magic and the supernatural but all it does is remind me that I'm just a weak girl, a prize at best for some fantasy prince. Before this all began, I at least had confidence I was good, even great at what I loved, but now I realize I was nothing compared to the world."
"A big fish swimming in a small pond when they discover there's an ocean," Kodachi commented, "I think you should be grateful that you have the opportunity to be normal. Everyone you compare yourself to has had to forsake the chance of a normal life, willingly or not. Hibiki spends most of his time lost around the globe. Kunoji had forsaken her womanhood and trained every day for revenge. Shampoo was born into a warrior culture with thousands of years of history and trained in a remote village her entire life to be their best. Ranma-sama lost his entire childhood to the art. I, on the other hand, was born a Kuno and that was enough to forsake my fate."
Akane sighed. Part of her wanted to be angry at the comment that should be grateful, but at the same time, it was hard to imagine sacrificing her entire childhood to punch harder. It'd be nice to be able to rescue herself but lose her friends, sisters and everything that made herherjust for power. She looked back at Kodachi, the other option of being born 'special'. "Yeah, can't say I envy you. Your family is a madhouse I swear,"
Kodachi's expression turned dour, "Mad doesn't even begin to cover it, we are cursed,"
"Cursed? Like actually magically cursed?"
The school's clock rang, "Apologies, I must be returning. Still, I thank you for indulging me and spending your lunch with me."
"Uh, my pleasure?"
"Oh, and would it be possible to take your bento with me? I haven't finished and I wish to. I will return it to your household this evening, or should I be occupied, tomorrow at lunch here?"
Akane, dumbfounded, could only nod.
Kodachi smiled sweetly again. "Adieu," she said, backstepping off the roof.
Akane looked over the edge and saw the rich girl begin to swing from place to place with her ribbon.
"Bye?"
It was mid-afternoon, which meant it was time for their new music class. Most were excited to start practicing. Ranma had been surprisingly muttering to himself before and during class as he went back and fore between reading a violin teaching book and practising the odd note. Apparently, Mercury-Sensei was fine with him practicing separately from the class due to the great difficulty of learning violin compared to most instruments. Everything was fine, but outside trouble was brewing.
"Listen, kid, unless you got an older sibling here or something, a high school, especially this one, is no place for a child!" Hinako-sensei said to a little girl wearing an elementary uniform. Perhaps it would have gone over better if Hinako wasn't currently a child herself.
"Who are you calling a child, child?!" The little girl yelled back.
"You, you brat!"
"I'll teach you to mess with me!" The little girl began to search her clothing for something.
"Oh no, you don't, Happo Five-Yen Satsu!"
"Ah, crap baskets!" The girl cried before falling face-first onto the ground. Hinako herself was surprised to find that she was in adult form despite only draining a child. But then again, this was Nerima.
"Now, just have to bring you to a police box, they should know if a student is missing. Your path towards delinquency shall be prevented yet." Hinako smiled as she lifted and carry the girl away, unaware of another uninvited visitor to the school had just entered.
"Finally, after all this time!" The boy yelled.
Back in the music room,
"Alright, everyone ready?" The class nodded back to their teacher, "Alright, and a one and a two-"
KABOOM*The wall in the room exploded, "Ranma die!"
From the newly formed hole came charging forth a young man wielding a red umbrella as a weapon.
"Ryoga!?" Ranma shouted as he leapt up into the air, tossing his violin and bow into Akane simultaneously.
Landing atop the cursed piano, Ranma looked at his opponent "What's the big idea Ryoga?!"
"You ruined my life, you jerk!" Ryoga once again charged forth while the class's students quickly dodged out of the way. His umbrella struck the dark piano which somehow was unscathed by the attack but Ranma had already leapt outside through the newly made hole.
"Yeah yeah, but I thought we already settled our beef, what's the big idea, do you need help getting back to Akari's farm?"
Ryoga's face turned red, "Because of you I can never go back there!"
"Huh?"
"Die!" Ryoga charged forth, but when in full berserker mode as he is, he had little shot of hitting Ranma who leapt over him again.
"Ranma, what did you do?" Akane questioned.
"I ain't done nothing!" Ranma defended, "It's been months since I've been over there and last I saw they were a happy couple!"
"Don't even try to weasel out of this one Ranma! Everything was going so well but then…"
"But then…?" Both Ranma
"Akari was cuddling with me while I was asleep and I muttered your name…"
"My name?" Ranma did a double-take, "Why in the hell would ya do that?!"
"Cause I was having a dream-a nightmare of the time you went crazy about me!"
Akane clapped her palm with her fist, "Oh he must be referring to the koi rod incident."
"The what?" Ranma somehow looked more confused.
Some of the students noticed that their teacher had joined them in watching the scene unfold intently.
"Shouldn't you be stopping this?" Yuki asked.
"In a moment, I never hear this story before," the class collectively sweat dropped at their fully absorbed teacher.
"Koi rod incident? I don't member anything any incident," Ranma questioned Akane and Ryoga.
"Oh, it's when Ryoga hit you with a fishing rod line that makes the target fall madly in love with the user."
Everyone stared at Ryoga.
"Wait what?" One bystander yelled.
"Is Ryoga gay? Why are the hot ones always gay?!"
"Oh, my fics will write themselves!" Another bystander cried out in delight.
"Ryoga buddy," Ranma leapt over to Ryoga and stared into his eyes " . . .that…."
Ryoga swiped at Ranma who leapt away, "It wasn't meant for you-I mean I thought it was a weapon! Instead, I had to deal with you trying to sleep with me and cuddle me, kiss me even!"
"So this is why everyone seems to think he's my dad…" Mercury muttered aloud.
Hiroshi, the only one to hear, stared at his teacher.
"You!You haunt my dreams and nightmares Ranma for what you did to me, and now I've lost my chance at love! I'm doomed to be forever alone!"
"Uh, Ryoga, as distributing as that story is, it sounds like it was your fault it happened…" Ranma scratched his cheek.
"I don't care, you will die for it!" Ryoga looked ready to throw his umbrella at Ranma when a sound unheard before in Nerima rang out. Ryoga's red umbrella shattered in pieces, as eyes turned towards the noise's source, a smoking revolver in their teacher's hand.
"Kids, you're all about to get an American education," Mercury declared before staring at Ryoga, "Ever heard that first lesson you learn as an adult boy?"
"A gun?! That's not fair!" Ryoga protested.
"Life isn't fair, life will beat the shit out of you for its cares. Doesn't matter if it's unfair, right or wrong or your doing. Shit may have not been your fault, but it is as hell your responsibility nonetheless and that goes for your life as well. Expecting someone else to save you will only drag you and that person down."
"Why-why should I listen to you?!" Ryoga yelled but another shot rang out and Ryoga felt like something had burned a line against his face.
"Cause your life may be hell, but it's only the first layer and I'm happy to drag you to the bottom if you aren't interested in being a good adult," their teacher had a demonic grin.
Ryoga, unsurprisingly, was terrified. Sure, he'd be shot at before, accidentally trespassing onto military bases and whatnot, but he was in an open field with no cover and this person clearly not only a good shot but had no issue in killing him right there.
"Ranma, do something!" Akane whispered shouted.
"She has a gun Akane, I'm not even that fast if she decides to shoot him!" Still, he couldn't just let her kill him, "Uh, teach, could you not kill my best friend?"
"He just admitted to brainwashing you, even if you weren't the target, to force someone into falling love is despicable and-"
"Princess Rosemary!"A woman yelled out.
"AAHH, auntie!" 'Mercury' shrieked.
Everyone turned to the new voice and was shocked to see Ukyo alongside Konatsu standing at the gate.
"What in the world do you think you're doing?" Ukyo questioned.
"I was… I was teaching Ryoga a lesson?"
"Using firearms?" Ukyo marched forward to Mercury.
"No bullets!" She opened the gun and displayed the empty barrel, "See?"
"I know you don't use real bullets Rose cause you use concentrated fire ki which is far more dangerous!" Now face to face with her, Ukyo swiped the gun from the teacher's hand.
"Besides using violence to teach Ryoga a lesson is the worst way to go about it, his head is literally tougher than rocks," Ukyo put the gun into her bag, "What would have you done if you had seriously injured or killed him?"
"I…" her eyes turned downward.
"Exactly, you only know lethal techniques so don't risk using them on any ally, understood?"
"…yes Auntie,"
"Ucchan… you know our teacher?" Ranma asked.
"And how are you her aunt?" Akane added.
Ukyo sighed, "It's complicated, to say the least."
"Family friends to make things simple, she's not my biological aunt," their teacher remarked who looked around the scene, "Guess I did get carried away, huh… alright class, let's move back into the room, the show is over!"
The students all mostly mildly expressed disappointment but obeyed. Save for the martial artists of course who lingered behind.
"Before we get to class, there's something I need to do," Ukyo pointed to Ranma and Akane, "You two come here please."
"Huh, what's up?" Ranma and Akane walked over. Before both of them knew it, they were pulled into a crushing hug by Ukyo.
"Ucchan?!"
"Ukyo!"
"Listen," both stopped their protests, "You both matter a lot to me and don't you ever forget that, understood?" Ukyo whispered. Akane swore she could hear a sniff from Ukyo.
After thirty seconds, she let both of them.
"You ok buddy?" Ranma asked.
Ukyo snickered, "It always was buddy, wasn't it?" She then breathed in and smack her cheeks, "Right!"
She fist-pumped before giving a hard stare at Ranma, a furious one.
"Hey, what'd I'd do?"
Ukyo then head-butted Ranma, knocking him to the ground.
"Ow!"
"Saotome Ranma, never ever forget that you are loved and wanted in this world, regardless of whatever happens or who you need to be. You hear me!?"
"Wha-"
"I said, did you hear me?!" She had a full death glare now at him.
"Uh, yeah. I'm… wanted?"
"Good enough for now, I suppose," Ukyo huffed, "Let's get to class."
Ukyo looked back at the gate and waved at Konatsu brightly before turning back to her friends and grabbing their shoulders, walking them all to class.
"What heck was that all about Ukyo?" Akane demanded.
Ukyo smiled lightly, "I… received some bad news and was having a tough time of it I suppose. We will get through it though," Ukyo smiled, "Come on, we shouldn't keep a Princess waiting, especially if she's our teacher."
"She's not actually a princess right?" Akane asked, but it went to deaf ears as the class shuffled back through the hole into their room. Ryoga meanwhile was forgotten and left standing there stunned.
"I guess… I'll go set up my tent somewhere," the defeated boy wandered off. His destination was the vacant lot he often camped at, but unfortunately, he took a wrong turn in Bow Valley on his way there.
Meanwhile, a second-floor observer couldn't keep her eyes off the situation.
'So Ryu Anko is Princess Rosemary. While I might be inclined to assume the princess is a cute nickname, the unique name and knowing her heritage is half Chinese, particularly born close to Jusenkyo tells me she's from the Musk tribe. Certainly helps explain her absurd strength, coupled with training from a member of the Amazons, no wonder she's a terrifying assassin. But how does Ukyo play into this and why is she called auntie?'A dark thought occurred to Nabiki,'Could Ukyo have been replaced? We're dealing with magical assassins, everything is on the board. But then Konatsu would have noticed. According to Ranma and others, his ninja skills are excellent so he would have noticed a change. This group clearly seems to care for my well-being as well as my family and Ranma. One won't go to such lengths to train an enemy. There's something I'm missing… maybe I should risk it and ask Cologne.'
"Hey boss!" a female student shouted.
"What is it, Suzuki?" Nabiki questioned.
"Saiko is trying to leverage the ramen twins again," Suzuki leaned closer, "Says you're old news and they shouldn't worry about retaliation."
"Wonderful," Nabiki pinched her brow, "Inform Taiyo and Heigi of the situation, we will meet after school."
"Understood boss!" Suzuki darted off.
'I'll take care of my personal affairs before investigating this matter. Tomorrow perhaps? I will catch you yet, Rose. Speaking of which…'
"I will have to borrow Yugi's Dragon Ball collection," Nabiki muttered to herself, "I have some reading to do."
The rest of the school day was relatively uneventful. Ranma continued to be frustrated at his progress but their teacher assured him that he was making incredible progress for his age. Akane found the class fun, but not particularly enlightening. Ukyo's sure seemed to have a chuckle at Ranma's expense which was… different. She in fact didn't flirt with Ranma at all and seemed more interested in teasing Mercury and even Ranma at times. Akane did manage to question Ukyo further about their teacher during a short break by the water fountain,
"She won't have actually… killed Ryoga would she?"
Ukyo choked on the water she was drinking, "*cough* uhhh… How to put this? Rose is a sweet girl, but she also really likes fighting and… she doesn't know how to be non-lethal…"
"Then she's actually…"
Ukyo sighed and put her back to the wall, "Killed people? Unfortunately yes, she was traine-conditioned really to never hold back and be efficient in her methods. She was barely thirteen when she was kidnapped and forced through the training."
"Who could do that to someone?
Ukyo's expression turned dark, "A monster."
"I'm kinda scared to go back to class now…"
"Hey, like I said, Rose is, at heart, a kind girl who carries the weight of the world on her shoulder. Just don't call Ranma a freak or manly…"
"Why?"
"Oh, things start to ignite around if you do."
"Wow, so she's a lot like Anko?"
Ukyo deadeye stared at her close friend, 'Were we really this dense back then? Was I this dense? Then again… P-Chan…'Ukyo chuckled to herself,'Wait where did Ryoga go after the fight.'
"Oh shit," Ukyo muttered as everyone began to go back into class.
Ranma meanwhile, seemed distracted the whole day. At first, Akane thought it was just his difficulties with the violin but once school was over, he asked if she was ok to go home by herself.
"What's wrong?" Akane asked.
"Nothing's wrong, it's just…"
"It's just?"
"I don't know, some things people been saying been bugging me. Kicking around in my head and won't stop. I need some time alone I think. Think it through and figure out what's the matter with me,"
"Oh, well… I'm here if you wanna talk."
Ranma looked briefly taken aback before smiling, "Thanks Akane. I wanna get the basics first sorted, don't wanna piss you off or anything by accident."
"What, don't you like Kyoto around this time of year?" They both chuckled at the joke. It was moments like these that made the idea of them being fiancés so much easier. Shame truly everyone else had different ideas.
"Later's tomboy!"
"See ya jerk!"
Ranma disappeared to who knows where and Akane was left to walk home. Eventually, Akane's peaceful walk home was interrupted, expectedly, by a little girl screaming, which was unexpected. Akane turned to see a preschooler being chased by a Shibi Inu pup.
"Curse you dog and your whole family! Ingumani put you up to this didn't he?!" The girl yelled, which while odd, wasn't too strange for Nerima. Akane moved between the girl and the dog, stomping her foot.
"Hey, leave her alone!" Akane commanded which the dog quickly obeyed. At the sight of Akane's battle aura, the dog yelped and ran off.
"You ok?" Akane looked back at the little girl who was now hiding behind her leg. She wore a yellow hat common for preschoolers and a light blue dress. The girl had long black hair and brown eyes. Something about her appearance was familiar but Akane couldn't place it.
"Bad dog, stupid dog…" the girl quietly muttered.
"Are you ok?" Akane leaned down to the girl's level, "That dog didn't bite you, did they?"
The little girl's eyes seemed to shine as she looked at Akane.
"My champion!" The girl hugged Akane.
"Hey, it's ok, it was just a little dog," Akane patted the girl's back.
The child moved back, "I've found you at last!"
"Found me?" Akane tilted her head.
"I've been looking everywhere for you today, but I kept encountering obstacles!" The child shook her fist, "Mean teachers, mean directions, mean dogs! I've seen it all, Nerima is such a dangerous place!"
"Uh yeah, it can be. Especially for a normal person," Akane gave her best Kasumi smile.
"But thankfully you're no normal person!"
Akane felt a vein pop, "Geez, thanks…"
"It's a compliment I assure you, after all, you are the champion of the goddess Himiko!"
"Himiko, whose that?" Akane wasn't an expert on mythology after all.
"Why, she's me!" Akane had seen many strange things in her life but she was pretty certain this was just a case of a kid being 'imaginative'.
"Please disregard my current form, my brethren thought it suitable I would be given a child's form as I'm considered young by their standards."
"Young?"
"Yup, I'm only 1,528 years old after all. A brat in their eyes, the jerks," the girl huffed. Akane gave an awkward laugh.
"Uh well it was nice to meet you Himiko-chan, but I must get going-"
"Wait, please wait!" Himiko grabbed Akane's skirt. "I'm the eighth goddess of luck, fortune and more! I can offer you so much!"
'Aren't there only seven gods of luck?'Akane sighed, "Like a normal life?"
"Uhhh, I think that's out of my power range. The other gods would be upset with me if I ruined one of our favourite comedies."
"Comedies?"
"Nothing to concern yourself with!" The would-be-god posed dramatically, "Come on, I could give you untold riches, give you anything someone of your age would desire!"
"What, like make my breasts bigger or something?"
"… ok, I'm going to do you a favour and not grant you that , you don't want it."
"You sure have a lot of wishes you won't grant," Akane sighed, "You know what, I'm good, I'm sure there are plenty of others around here that'd fight to the death for a wish and are stronger than me. I'll save myself the headache and potential kidnapping. Thank you and have a good day,"
"Please! I'll grant you any wish you want!" The child pleaded "A lifetime of free cable, find your true love, remove your curse on cooking, the possibilities are nearly endless!"
Akane stopped in her step, "Wait, could you cure the Jusenkyo curse?"
The little girl looked surprised, dumbfounded at the question. "Cure it? Of course! I created the darn springs, it barely even counts as a wish, it's so easy." She smugly remarked.
"Wait what?"
The child produced a fan, "I am the great Himiko, the fantastical nine-tailed fox goddess of fortune and misfortune, blessings and curses, comedies and tragedies! And you, Tendo Akane, like your ancestor Tendo Shinzo, are my champion against a great demon!"
The little child then produced a laugh that was eerily familiar.
"Ohohohoho!"
Meanwhile in the forest close to Furinkan High School,
"Damn Ranma and that woman. Stupid jerks…" Ryouga muttered as he set up his tent, "Because of them I'm lost in Russia again for the third time this week. Stupid jerks!"
That phrase rang out again in his mind.
'Shit may have not been your fault, but it is as hell your responsibility nonetheless and that goes for your life as well.'
Ryoga looked up at the sky, "It has to be someone's fault. It just can't be my own doing that my life is so cursed."
"Well, I got just the thing for ya then buddy!" A familiar voice said from somewhere.
Ryouga looked around when someone unexpectedly popped out from a tree next to Ryoga, hanging upside down.
"Ranma?" Ryoga was confused.
"That's right buddy, and I got something for ya that going to make things a lot easier," they grinned.
Meanwhile, alongside a riverbank.
"So what exactly is this demon and how am I supposed to defeat them?" Akane asked the child riding on her shoulders.
"Kill, not defeat. Defeating her will only make her a later problemagain," Himiko smiled brightly, "To defeat her you'll first need to find your ancestor's weapon. If I'm correct, which I always am, it should imbue you with your ancestor's knowledge."
'Why do I get the feeling you're wrong about a lot of things,"Akane sighed, "That feels like cheating."
"Your ancestor did the work so you could destroy this demon, it'd be a waste of his efforts to forsake it!"
Akane grumbled, "Still, I wish- huh?" A noise caught her attention; Someone shouting. Approaching closer, she realized she recognized the voice.
"I…. Am a Man!" Ranma shot a small ki ball down the river. It didn't even make ten yards before fizzling out.
'This is what he call's introspection? No wonder he's a blockhead…'
"I am a manly man!" He shouted again, this time his hands merely a push of air.
"You and the whole world know it, stupid," Akane remarked.
"Akane!" Ranma spun around to see her, "What're you doing here?"
"I got sidetracked getting this little girl out of trouble," Akane pointed above her head.
"What girl?"
Akane suddenly realized her shoulders were lighter and looked all around, but couldn't find Himiko.
"Where did she go?"
"You lost a kid you were carrying?"
"She was just here…" Akane growled, "Ugh maybe she's is a goddess…"
"A goddess?"
"Don't worry about it, it's just another weird day in Nerima" Akane sighed before crossing her arms at Ranma, "So what exactly does yelling at a river help in sorting your thoughts?"
"Well, I…" Ranma looked away, "My pops would call it self-discipline I suppose. 'Boy, you need to understand that being a man is a responsibility, without men like us it would fall apart.' He'd say ya know as he's looting a temple or something." Ranma sat down on the grass along the bank, "I've been have troubles lately, up here ya know?" Ranma pointed to his head, "My head's telling me something wrong with me but I can't figure out what it is. It's like I'm hungry but full, nervous but have nothing to worry about, my body, it just feels…"
"Wrong," Ranma looked back to Akane, who took a seat next to him, "Like it's been stretched or disorganized. You can look in the mirror and see nothing wrong, but your heart aches in pain."
"Yeah, what you said," Ranma couldn't take his eyes off Akane who stared off into the distance.
"Honestly, some days I think I'm going mad as I stare at a mirror. 'Is this who I want to be?', 'What's wrong with me?' and I just get so angry I could punch the mirror. I try to talk to Nabiki, Kasumi, my dad or any of my friends about it and they just don't get it!" Akane pulled to her knees. Ranma only nodded as he joined her in looking at the sunset. The two sat in silence for a little bit, unaware they were being watched by someone in a nearby alleyway.
"Yes, yes! Now kiss kiss," whispered-chanted the nearby self-proclaimed deity. Like all shippers, Himiko hid in her natural habitat; the trash.
"The worst thing is…" Ranma grew quieter, "I know what makes it go way."
"You do?" Akane almost stood up but tempered herself seeing Ranma give a solemn head.
"When I change to a girl, it goes away," Ranma looked up at the sky, "It's like breathing is easier."
"But you hate being a girl!" Akane decried.
"I hate how good it feels. I feel guilty like every second someone is yelling I'm weak, a freak and a pervert for enjoying it. My purpose in my life is to be a man among men for hell's sake! And yet…" Ranma looked away. Akane meanwhile had her eyes turned downward before standing abruptly.
"Hey, where you going?" Ranma asked.
"I'm going home!" She yelled. Ranma was stunned but grumbled and trailed behind once his stomach protested its emptiness.'Guess this is what I get for sharing my troubles, guess I should be lucky she didn't yell pervert at me.'Ranma bemoaned.
Akane, on the other hand,'Why? Why couldn't I just have been born a normal girl who doesn't have these accursed thoughts? Why do I long to be a man?'tears escaped fromherhis face as he sped walk home.
For an onlooker, they cursed a different matter. "Oh for my sake, is divine help not even enough to get this ship to sail?!" the nearby garbage cried.
