Chapter 84
Hopes and Dreams
Lily sighed as she looked out of the bedroom window, with the sun setting. She was exhausted from the day's training with Moody, as well as continuing her martial arts training. Her days during the summer had mostly consisted of the same thing; wake up, breakfast, shower, training with Moody, lunch, martial arts training with a muggle mentor Sirius had hired, spending time with Ginny, dinner, shower, something fun, whether it be a computer game, reading, or watching television, and then get ready for bed.
Whilst it was monotonous, every day what she read in the news pushed her to keep going. She had heard about Mr. Ollivander being kidnapped, which worried her. Whilst it was true that he had been unusual, and made her feel a little unsure, no one deserved to be taken, or likely tortured.
She didn't understand why Ollivander had been taken, but that wasn't the only news. Florean Fortescue, who had run the ice cream store in Diagon Alley, had disappeared. That news had upset her a lot. Fortescue had been kind to her, letting her enjoy ice cream when studying when they were in London.
They were staying at Grimmauld Place, which had a lot of enchantments and protections in place, and sometimes at the Burrow, which, likewise, had been given a great deal of enchantments and protection spells.
Of course, being at either property was somewhat comforting. She felt safe, which she knew was a feeling in short supply with everything that was going on. She had heard Moody and Sirius talking about the death of Emmeline Vance, a member of the Order of the Phoenix, though, thanks to Barty Crouch Junior switching sides, Madam Bones was safe, hidden somewhere for her protection.
As she sat on her bed, she thought of everything that had happened, from the battle at the Ministry, and the resulting consequences, with Voldemort now opening attacking people. She wanted to be stronger, and better, so she had put a lot into her training. She was faster and quicker, now, and she was getting better with her spells.
No longer having the trace on her meant she could cast spells when she needed to, and wherever she wanted, without being able to be tracked, so there were times when Lily and the Order of the Dragon, all of whom were training every day, met in different locations, mostly in forests and isolated fields.
Her friends that had fought with her at the Ministry had pushed themselves in training, and under the watchful eye of members of the Order of the Phoenix, including Viktor Krum, Cedric Diggory, Minerva, Sirius, and Molly. Molly had thrown herself into teaching the students how to fight better.
What had surprised Lily most was how powerful Molly was. She had always seen Molly as a motherly figure, much like Aunt Minnie, but to see her in action was a treat for Lily. She was grieving still, and yet she wasn't letting anything stop her. It was like a fire had been lit within her, and now she was determined to destroy any Death Eater, alongside the Order.
She stood up, still not feeling tired despite the busy day, so she changed out of her night clothes, and got into her muggle clothes. She wanted to get some air, so she went up to the roof garden, looking out over London, seeing the night lights. She had been reading the muggle papers, and watching the news, and seeing the attacks that had happened, including a bridge that had been destroyed, killing people, as well as muggles being attacked without anyone knowing how.
Of course, Lily knew that meant it had been wizarding attacks, with the Avada Kedavra spell being used. How many people were going to be killed just because they were muggles? She hated Voldemort and all he stood for, and she would stop him.
As she stood on the roof garden, she began to go through her martial arts training, moving slowly as she began to stretch out her legs, and then stretching out her arms as though she were punching someone.
She found it funny how powerful wizards had never thought of doing anything like martial arts, and yet she knew it would help her when fighting, since most witches and wizards would only rely on their magic, and not be expecting a punch in the face.
As she moved through the different poses and moves, she closed her eyes to be able to focus on everything around her. She could hear the distant sound of cars driving through nearly empty streets, the wind blowing her hair gently as she stood there, and the sound of a train that wasn't too far from where they were.
As she became more attuned to everything going on around her, she heard the door to the roof opening, and the footsteps of someone coming outside. They weren't heavy footsteps, so it wasn't Sirius or Remus, and in that instant, Lily smelt the gentle perfume that she had brought for Ginny.
"I didn't worry you, did I?" Lily asked, without opening her eyes as Ginny moved in line beside Lily, copying her moves.
"No, I figured you were up here, so I decided to join you," Ginny replied. Lily opened her eyes and saw a small smile on Ginny's face.
"I always welcome your company," Lily said, grinning at her girlfriend. "I was hoping you might join me up here."
"Well, Sirius and Remus are talking about the wedding, and honestly, I can only take so much wedding planning. Mum's enjoying it though," Ginny chuckled. "I just… she keeps hinting about me and you getting married."
"Oh good, I'm not the only one dealing with that," Lily teased. "Uncle Sirius keeps hinting about me and you getting married."
"I guess everyone wants us to have a happy future," Ginny suggested.
"I guess, and it's endearing, but I want to focus on this damned war before thinking of that," Lily said. She then stopped, and looked at Ginny, before sitting on one of the chairs on the roof. She loved the spell that stopped any rain from falling on the roof garden, so it would allow the furniture to always remain dry. "Do you want to get married?"
"Me?" Ginny asked. "No, I'm happy to wait and focus on the war," Ginny replied, her eyes a little wide as she sat on another chair. "Do you want to get married?"
"I think… one day… but I want to spend my life with you. Still, I'm only fifteen, almost sixteen, and you're going on Fifteen," Lily said. "I know in the wizarding world, we're technically adults at seventeen and not eighteen like in the muggle world, but…"
"We're not exactly like normal teenagers though, are we? We're… more mature, wouldn't you say?" Ginny asked. Lily nodded softly as she met Ginny's gaze.
"I suppose we are," Lily agreed. "After everything we've been through, how can we not be?"
"Not exactly how I pictured life going for us, that's for sure," Ginny chuckled softly as she briefly looked at the ground, shaking her head. She then met Lily's gaze again. "I just… I don't know what I expected with life."
"No one ever knows what to expect," Lily pointed out. "I just… I'm tired of trying to anticipate what's coming, and plan to take everything as it comes."
"Which works well in peace, but can we really manage that in war?" Ginny asked. She then laughed softly. "Merlin, listen to us. We're definitely more mature than we should be."
"Yeah, that's pretty evident," Lily agreed. She looked at Ginny. "You want to get married, don't you?"
"One day I do," Ginny confirmed. "And I don't want you proposing just because you think you should, or because everything thinks you should."
"Oh, I wouldn't dare do that," Lily promised. "But… now we know… we know that we will be getting married one day."
"I guess we will," Ginny concurred. "I just want to be able to live peacefully, and not have to worry about everything."
"Hey, you're not alone with that. I am… well, I am a little concerned about the future, but I think if I think too far ahead… I'll just panic, which is why I want to start living in the moment more," Lily explained.
"I understand that," Ginny said, getting up and sitting on Lily's lap. "There's so much I want to do, so much I want to see, and feel…"
"Tell me," Lily spoke softly, holding Ginny's hand in hers.
"I love playing Quidditch, and part of me thinks I want to play professionally when I leave Hogwarts, but I want to travel the world. I want to visit so many different places, like the Colosseum in Rome, I want to see Greece and where some ancient battles were fought, maybe even travel across America and see the different historical sites there," Ginny explained.
"Well, when we're done with Hogwarts, we'll both travel the world, together," Lily told her. "If you want to see all of that, then that's what we'll do."
"You mean that?" Ginny asked. Lily nodded.
"Definitely," Lily promised. Ginny grinned and kissed Lily. She then cupped Lily's cheek with her hand.
"And what do you want to do?" Ginny asked. Lily smiled softly.
"I honestly don't know. Part of me wants to work at the Ministry, like the Minister suggested. Part of me wants to just vanish after the war and live in peace, and not have the whole world looking on at me. But if there is one thing I know, it's that I love spending my time with you, and I feel safe and comfortable with you," Lily told her.
"You always know the right thing to say," Ginny complimented, before kissing Lily. As they sat there, Lily looked up at the night sky, looking at the stars. "I know you've got about a million things running through your mind right now."
"Sounds about right," Lily agreed. "The stars are so beautiful, aren't they? I used to stare up at them most nights and dream about… well, so many wonderous things. When I first got to Hogwarts, that first night, I sat on the window box in the boy's dorm, and I just looked up at them, wondering what the future would bring. I thought learning about magic was going to be the most incredible adventure anyone could hope to have, especially when I was raised like a muggle."
"Those nights seem so far away, don't they?" Ginny asked softly.
"There are times when I wonder if they were even real. Oh, not in the sense that I wonder if they really happened, but the dreams themselves… given everything we've seen and done, it feels like they were just… a fool's hope," Lily explained.
"Dad used to say that hope is the most powerful thing we have. After the events in the Chamber, I… I spent a lot of nights trying not to sleep. I was given sleeping draughts, but they never took away the fear. I told dad I had wanted to prove myself, and when I first wrote in the diary, I hoped it would help," Ginny told her.
"He wasn't wrong. Hoping is never a bad thing," Lily replied. "We all hope for a better life, for a better world. Isn't that why Professor Dumbledore formed the Order of the Phoenix? He wanted to hope, and so did your dad. I'm just sorry he didn't see the world he wanted to see."
"I think he did, in a way. He saw it in me and you," Ginny countered, a tear in her eye. Lily locked eyes with Ginny and saw what she felt in that moment. Lily could only nod in agreement; she understood what was going through her thoughts.
Arthur had seen the purity and strength of love within Lily and Ginny, and Lily knew he would have given everything to protect it. Yes, he would have died for any of his loved ones, but there was a beauty within Lily and Ginny; everyone was saying it.
"So, we make him proud by moving forward, together," Lily wrapped her arms around Ginny, hugging her as they looked up at the stars together, a small smile on both their faces.
Sirius walked softly down the stairs, having heard Lily and Ginny talking, and smiled as he walked into the lounge, seeing Remus relaxing on the sofa. "Everything okay?" Remus asked. Sirius nodded as he sat next to Remus.
"It is. Lily and Ginny are on the roof again, talking. They were talking about the future. They both want to get married, but they're waiting for the right time to actually propose," Sirius replied. Remus chuckled softly.
"Were we as mature as them when we were their age?" he asked. Sirius let out a short bark of laughter.
"Oh, hell no. Come on Moony, you had to keep me and Padfoot from getting into trouble all the time. Hell, by this point, we were already running around as Animagi, keeping you company when you turned," Sirius pointed out. Remus smiled fondly at the memory.
"Things were so much simpler back then, weren't they?" Remus asked.
"No, we were just cocky and ignorant of everything. The war was going on, but we were kids, and Mouldy Shorts wasn't trying to kill kids back then, just recruit them," Sirius replied. Remus let out a soft sigh as he snuggled up to Sirius.
"I guess so," Remus agreed. "I just… I miss James, and Lily, and the simple life, before all of this, before Azkaban… all of it."
"Oh, I'd love to be back then, living the easy life of ignorance, but this is what being an adult is. God, I hated the idea of being… sensible when I was younger," Sirius joked.
"And everyone knew it. When I first came to live here and Minerva was visiting, she reminded me of some of the pranks you and James used to pull. Apparently, it took weeks for her office to look normal again," Remus told him. Sirius laughed softly.
"Yeah, I remember that. I still don't know how James managed to pull that one off, but it was fun. And now here we are, even working with Sniv… with Severus, the one person James and I hated," Sirius said.
"Signs of getting mature, Padfoot my love," Remus told him. "I was proud of you, inviting him to dinner, to catch up and mend bridges."
"Thank you, Remus," Sirius said solemnly. "When Lily shouted at Severus and I that night… shit, for a moment, I thought her mum had returned. Severus did too, I think."
"So did I," Remus laughed as he confessed his thoughts. "Lily is so much like her mother, and now, she looks more like her. I have to admit, I've been doing some research into something for her, but I didn't want to get Lily's hopes up, plus, she's too young to think of this anyway."
"Oh?" Sirius's interest was piqued now.
"I've been researching about Lily and Ginny having children, and I think I found a way to help make sure they can, when they're older," Remus said. "I was speaking with Severus about it, and we found a potion that Lily can use when she's transitioned. She'll be able to use her Metamorphmagus abilities to get the needed parts, and then if she takes a potion, for the time she's using that part, she'll be able to impregnate Ginny."
"Moony, that's… that's incredible!" Sirius exclaimed, his eyes wide. "How did you find that?"
"Severus did the hard work. He's very gifted as a potions master," Remus pointed out. "I think… well, I have a suspicion about something, but it is only a suspicion."
"You've done well so far with your thoughts, so don't stop now," Sirius said, kissing Remus's forehead.
"I suspect Lily told Severus how her mother felt about him, and how, if Severus hadn't been in Slytherin, she'd have ended up with him," Remus explained. Sirius thought carefully and nodded softly in agreement.
"That makes sense, really. Maybe it's what Severus needed to hear, to help push him to do more like this," Sirius agreed.
"I hope so," Remus said. Sirius snuggled up to Remus, kissing his lips softly.
"So do I, love," Sirius said. "So do I."
