Notes: This chapter has been cut for content. The spicier take is on AO3, under this username.

Chapter 26: A Joining of the Hearts…

I gently guided Krystal up to the living area, making a direct line for the bathroom. We barely made it to the toilet before she lost the fight against her nausea; I winced as she retched up the remains of her breakfast. She was trembling after she finished; her breath coming in hitched sobs. I looked up to the sink, spotting the mug I had used to store my toothbrush; I filled it with water and handed it to her so she could rinse her mouth out.

"Thank you, che…" her voice was weak and broken. I helped her stand up; holding onto her as tears flowed freely down her cheeks. "The one in the stasis pod. I… knew him. Corian Ireth; Jalner's silche. As my lifemate's silche, we were… close." That wave of sadness and grief brushed against my mind again as she clung to me, tears soaking into the outer layer of my flightsuit.

"Jesus," I hissed. "I'm so sorry, hon, I really am…" I wasn't sure what else to say, so I simply held her; the waves of grief and anxiety overtaking her almost palpable. It was strange; I could somehow tell the emotions were hers and not mine. I wasn't sure how to interpret it. The loss of a close friend stung; recalling bitter memories of both Kevin and Fi. Yet, Krys' loss seemed to be deeper than that; a combination of losing a close friend and a lover. "I can tell he meant a lot to you."

She slowly nodded against me; her embrace tightening ever so slightly. "I… I know you don't really understand our ways, but Jalner and I had Joined with our silche before we became lifemates. It is frowned upon by our Elders, but we cared for Corian and Narine as much as we did each other."

"Joined, hon?" I asked. "Is that some sort of mental connection between Cerinians?" I pondered this; was this something that I was starting to experience with her? Was that why I felt like I could feel her emotions?

I wasn't expecting her to answer an unspoken question. "Your thoughts aren't wrong," her voice choked out. "Please don't be frightened. We are… starting to do the same. I… I don't want to scare you away…"

Another wave of emotions crashed against my mind; a sense of dread and fear cutting through the grief and sadness. I realized what was happening; something I voiced. "You're afraid of losing me because of this." It wasn't a question.

She nodded; her arms winding around me. "I've lost too much," her breath hitched; escaping in a quiet sob. "Jalner. Narine. Corian. My parents, brother, sister, friends, my Clan… I'm… I'm tired of losing those I care about. I don't want to lose you, too…"

I held her closer as she trembled. The fact I could feel her emotional turmoil was heartbreaking. I now understood she had been afraid of this; something reopening those unhealed wounds. While we had crossed the boundary between friends and lovers, she was unsure how I would react to seeing those fears laid bare. "You're scared that I'm going to turn you away," I replied, "that what you've been through is too much of a burden for anyone to help you shoulder."

Krystal nodded again; her voice trembling and halting as she tried to explain. "It's difficult enough when a… highborn and a lowborn Join with each other. They aren't… prepared for our minds to connect. I… I didn't realize it would happen with you, Adam. I don't… I don't want my mind to influence yours; my feelings may be at odds with your own..."

I reached up to brush my glove-covered fingers against her cheek; she visibly relaxed as I continued the gentle act. "Krystal," I whispered, "your feelings are important. You have been through a lot of pain. That doesn't vanish overnight."

She looked up at me with tear-brimmed emerald eyes; I could feel her hesitancy and uncertainty. "I…" she broke off for a moment, taking a deep breath before gathering her courage. "I don't want our bond to stop you from making your way back to your home. What we just found proves there is a way for you to go back."

I closed my eyes for a moment. She was right; there was a chance, however remote, that I could get back home. At the same time I couldn't deny my own feelings. We'd fought side by side, bled together; saved each others' lives. I felt comfortable around her. I knew where my own feelings were headed… had already arrived, if I was being bluntly honest with myself. I was scared of them, especially after so short a time. At the same time I knew where this train was headed.

"I wish we had the time to really discuss this," I sighed, just wanting to get lost in Krystal's embrace. "There's so much we need to talk about." I thought about running my fingers through her hair, but stopped as I realized they were still inside the flightsuit's gloves. I frowned at that.

"Perhaps we can make the time?" Krystal's question was simple, yet the emotion behind those words was turbulent. "I want to talk about these things before I get too carried away. My judgment gets clouded when I am in season. It's a very strong pull, and I'm already fighting the urges." She pulled away to take my hand in hers; her fingers softly tracing against a seam at my wrist. She twisted it and I felt the glove pull away from my hand; I hadn't realized it could do that.

I nodded my thanks and quickly figured out how to shed the other glove. "Are you sure Fay isn't going to mind?" I asked. "I don't want to leave her to sort out all that equipment by herself."

Krystal shook her head; removing her own gloves and tail sheath before placing her fingers against her temple. "I've been in sporadic mental contact with her since we came up here," she explained. "She was worried about us and I told her we needed some time to discuss things. She told us to make sure we, well… enjoy our downtime, in her exact words." The insides of her ears lit up in a blush.

I blinked as I heard her relay the fairly forward suggestion. "It's a very tempting suggestion," I replied. "However, we should probably put temptation aside so we can discuss what's going on. But first, I really want to get out of this suit. I'm tired of feeling like I'm shrinkwrapped."

She gave me a mock pout. "And here I thought it showed off some of your fine… assets," she quipped as her pout transformed into a sultry look.

While I slipped out of the flightsuit I glanced up to see her give me a curious look, gently biting her bottom lip. "Dearheart," she remarked; her voice lowered to a husky growl, "if we're going to have a serious talk I suggest you get dressed quickly. I'm quite tempted, and I sense I'm not alone in this temptation…"

The temptation was there. It was most definitely there, and it was not one-sided. If it wasn't for the rational part of my mind practically screaming at me that we needed to discuss things, I would have let that temptation run rampant. Instead I took a deep breath and found my jeans, pulling them on before I could act on those infectious urges.

"Let's go out into the living room," she suggested; probably a good idea given the fact that her pheromones were starting to ramp up and it was obvious I wasn't immune to them. We ended up on the couch; despite the door to the small cargo bay being shut I was pretty sure if we tried anything out here Fay would likely notice.

The exhausted Cerinian nestled into me, but I could tell she was forcing herself to concentrate on the less physical aspects of our relationship. I held onto her; despite the mild arousal that I was sure came from a combination of her scent and our closeness I needed to keep my head somewhat clear. "There's things we absolutely need to discuss," I started, "but I don't exactly know where to begin. I'm kinda bad at these things."

Her muzzle fell onto my shoulder as my arms tightened around her. "Just speak your mind," she encouraged. "I can sense you feel more comfortable communicating like this. I wish to respect your boundaries and privacy, though I will warn you that it may not be possible as our bond progresses. Over time, the mental bond between mates grows stronger and we tend to share thoughts and emotions more easily; I sense that you've started to develop a sense of empathy when it comes to my emotions."

I nodded slightly, not wanting to disturb a position I could tell she found comfortable and secure. "Things are just going very quickly," I admitted. "I'm not sure how we should define things, and I think that's important. I need your input, Krys. I don't really know how all this works where you're from, and I want you to have a say in that." I looked down to admire her; even wearing a flightsuit and the fur around her eyes still damp from crying she possessed a radiant, calm beauty that I couldn't help but be entranced by.

"I hope you realize how much I enjoy feeling those thoughts from you," Krys's voice broke my musing. "Those were the first thoughts I sensed from you," she whispered. "When we first met in Krazoa Palace, you were entranced by my eyes and you thought I was beautiful. I was somewhat shocked at first. After being alone in the shuttle and feeling the wary hopefulness from the Cloudrunners who found me, your feelings were comforting."

"Is that why we've, well… moved so fast?" I asked, tilting my head slightly to the side to regard her.

"It took a little time for you to stop denying your attraction to me," she pointed out with a soft smile. "Your mind doesn't lie when it comes to those things, and it's not hard to sense if an attraction is sincere or if you had ulterior motives. In your case it was the former, considering I've already taken you as my mate."

I blinked at her, arching an eyebrow in surprise. "How quickly did it take you to find out, may I ask?"

Her lips tugged into an impish grin; her voice carrying a hint of that husky growl I heard earlier. "Do you remember how you pulled me away from that lava pit on Ice Mountain?" she asked. "We were lying next to each other afterwards. Right before Tricky interrupted us I felt a very faint thought for a split second; you were grateful that I wasn't badly harmed. You had a sudden impulse to kiss me; one you buried about as quickly as it came up."

Despite the fact we had done far more than that by this point, I felt a blush creep up to my face. "Well," I stammered, "I didn't really know you; that and the whole timeline thing. I figured Fox was going to show up, you two would be instantly attracted, and that would be that. I didn't want you to think I wasn't in control of those impulses."

Her mischievous grin widened; she looked like the ironically proverbial fox in the henhouse. "I would have welcomed it," she confessed. "I was hoping you would have noticed I was receptive; the subconscious thoughts I sometimes caught from you made it clear that you were attracted to me. Your reaction when you first saw me wearing this flightsuit was a dead giveaway." She smirked at me as she moved closer; I felt her nose press against mine and soft, warm puffs of her breath against my lips.

This time I didn't resist the impulse that crossed my mind. I tilted my head a little more and met her; savoring the soft, almost imperceptible moan she offered me as her lips parted, granting me entrance. I had become used to the way she kissed; the way her tongue flitted across mine and the more pronounced edges of her teeth as compared to mine. It was blissful; I felt my heart melting along with hers. I could feel her arms tighten around me and I felt compelled to do the same. With reluctance I eventually pulled away, at least being able to regard her soft smile and the contented feeling I felt from her mind. I felt something brush against my legs; I looked down to glimpse her tail falling across them much like a blanket.

I hadn't realized I had closed my eyes until I opened them; again Krystal's limpid emerald eyes gazed into mine as her soft smile graced her beautiful features. "I'm trying not to be distracted," I blurted out, "but I'm obviously not doing a great job of it."

"It doesn't mean I'm not enjoying this conversation," she retorted with a grin, which faded into a more pensive expression. "I think I'm starting to understand what you wished to discuss."

I tried to get right to the point. "I guess I'm trying to understand how what we just found will affect things," I confessed. "With us, I mean. That's why I'm trying to see where we stand, because I think we're going to have to make some difficult decisions in the coming days."

She nosed against me; her muzzle tucking into my neck. "I'm worried about that as well," she admitted; drawing a deep breath and sighing into the quiet room. "You may be able to return to your home, but you are wondering what that means for you and I." She didn't phrase it as a question.

"Yeah," I affirmed. "We know there's some sort of gate going between Ipran and Earth; it's likely a dangerous idea but there's a real chance I can go back home. At the same time I don't feel right just leaving you here, especially not after everything we've shared, hon."

Krystal glanced up at me; confusion set in her beautiful eyes. "Are you asking me if I would join you?" I could see the barest hint of a smile tug at her lips.

"You have no idea how much I wish I could do that," I breathed, yet I wasn't blind to the massive fly in the ointment. "It's just that Earth isn't like Lylat; humans are the only sapient species living there. You probably couldn't walk freely among us, and staying holed up in my house isn't much of a life. I couldn't do that to you…" I broke off as I sighed; I could feel the frustration and the sadness welling up in not just me, but her as well.

"I… understand, my che," Krystal replied with a sigh of her own. "I haven't given much thought to what I would do if we survive all this; up until a few days ago I thought I would meet my end here. I nearly did, if it wasn't for you."

"What did you want your life to be like when you were on Cerinia?" I asked as I continued to hold onto her, my hands still doing their best to ease the tension and stress out of my vulpine companion. If it couldn't last forever, I was going to spend as much time as I could with her. I should have known better; relationships were always very ephemeral for me. Fi and I had lasted eight months; not quite a year but still the longest I'd ever dated anyone. Despite my wishes for the contrary, with my track record how could my time with Krystal be any different?

Her expression become more wistful; a pensive tone entered her voice as she answered. "I wanted to help others," she explained. "Becoming a Guardian allowed me to do that. I wanted to help keep my people safe… for all the good it actually did." I felt her tail twitch as she sank back into me; now choking out the words. "I wanted to be there for Jalner and Narine; to be a good mate and silche to them…"

She buried her face in my chest; a series of sobs wracking her frame as I held her close. "I… I wanted to spend time with my mother and father, to help them with creating ornaments and jewelry to sell in the markets; we talked about taking one of the trading caravans to Geinolt to sell them to one of the trading houses owned by the Grand Council. I wanted to bear kits with my mate; to see them grow and guide them like my parents did for me…" She trailed off; I could feel her tears soaking into my shirt. "I… I lost all of that, che," she gasped.

I held onto her in silence; letting the emotions I was now feeling crash against hers. "You deserve these things," I whispered back. "I just don't know if I can really give them to you. I'm human and you're Cerinian; even if I wasn't snipped I couldn't give you children. If you came to Earth we would have to hide away; find an isolated place where I could work and you wouldn't be at risk of being found. It'd likely be just us and perhaps occasional visits from family and close friends. I could probably help you with making and selling jewelry if you wished to do that."

I tried to create mental images of what that life might entail. If I was lucky I could find a small house on some land in the country; that money I found on the ship would probably be enough. I could probably find remote work, but it would be a simple, limited existence. "Would something like that work for you?" I asked. "We've got time to think about it, but you have to be absolutely certain this is what you want. I know we're becoming attached to each other… I just want you to be happy and thrive, hon."

"You're saying that as if you expect me to say no," Krystal's voice murmured from her place tucked against my chest. "Your emotions expect me to ask you to come with me to Cerinia, or to find a place in Lylat to settle down. Cerinia would not work for us; the Elders of any city or prefecture would not accept me taking a non-Cerinian mate. In short, we would be exiled. Lylat presents its own issues. I may be able to thrive but you may not; I doubt Iprani are welcomed there as willingly as a Cerinian would be. Fay was terrified of you when she first woke; I felt her fear. I don't think I could live around those who were frightened by the sight of my mate, che. There's also something that you may not have thought about."

I blinked as she shifted her arm; I didn't realize what her intention was until her hand grasped mine. I felt her fingers slide betwixt mine; savoring the softness of the fur on her thumb as it traced a pattern on the back of my hand. "I sensed a couple of surface thoughts from Fay," she admitted. "I have the feeling she knows someone who has a great deal of power in Lylat. She wants to convince them to make contact with your world. If that was the case you would likely be able to help foster relations, right?"

I mulled over that possibility. Could that actually happen? I figured that even if there was an official dialog between Earth and Lylat it would be kept secret; the sheer ridiculousness of making an official announcement about video game characters being real and making first contact with us wouldn't go over too well. "How would an arrangement like that make you feel?" I asked as my free hand continued to work the tension out of her back.

My response was given in the form of the vixen in my arms shifting a bit; her muzzle tucking closer to my chest. We remained there for a little while; long enough that I wasn't prepared for her whispered voice to break the silence. "I'd follow you," she breathed. "I feel safe with you. I've tried to recall what happened outside the pirates' ship. I remember falling; being unable to breathe. I also remember feeling at peace; like I knew that you wouldn't let the Void claim me. I was scared, but I somehow knew that I would be okay."

I clung to her more tightly, eliciting a similar response. "I was so goddamn scared I was going to lose you," I admitted, shutting my eyes as those recent memories hit me in the face. "I thought I had already lost you. It's not like me to get attached like this so quickly, but…" I could feel tears start to form; I took a shaky breath and tried to let it out. "I didn't want that to be the last time I held you, Krys, or heard your voice; I didn't know what was going on with you. I nearly lost you to a goddamn stupid mistake…"

"We both made mistakes," she replied, nosing against my chest. "That's the scary part; we didn't know. However, please don't disregard the impact your actions made. You could have tried to carry me back to the shuttle, or panicked and lost precious time deciding what to do. I saw the mediscanner results, Adam. I wouldn't have survived if you hadn't done what you did."

I took a breath and prepared a response, but I was cut off by her hand brushing against my cheek. She pulled back to look at me; her captivating deep green eyes framed with cerulean and ivory fur still damp from the tears she had shed moments earlier. "On Cerinia, risking your life to save another's is considered the purest and most noble expression of selflessness and love one can perform. My cousin begged the Elders to allow her to take a lowborn as her kelche; he jumped into a river to save her after she lost her footing and got swept into its current. Jalner sacrificed his life to save mine. You've risked yours to do the same. I'm tired of losing everything and everyone I've ever cared about. I want to stay with you, my love..."

My heart skipped a beat at her choice of words as she leaned into me, her lips meeting mine with a hunger and passion behind them that took me by surprise. I fell back against the couch as I felt her hand slide to my shoulder; as I was pushed back against the cushions she shifted again to straddle me. As our tongues dueled in a passionate dance I felt a wave of pure emotion; a mixture of affection, love, and white-hot need that filled her mind. My hands fell to her hips; feeling her warmth through the textured material of her flightsuit.

Her lips let go of mine for a brief moment; both of us taking a sharp gasp of air before we met again; I was acutely aware of her grinding against me as a muffled, lust-filled growl carried from her mouth to mine. Her heartbeat thundered against me as we broke our kiss; the look in her eyes mirroring her emotions as we regarded each other. I was left bewildered, but I was fully aware of the direction things were heading. "I'd like that, too…" I breathed; just about overcome with the sudden turn of events. "I guess you are quite aware of the extent of my feelings for you."

Krystal flashed a mischievous grin as she lowered herself just a tiny bit; the sensation of her loins thrusting against mine incredibly distracting despite all our clothing. "Like I said, love," she purred, "I chose you as my halche for a reason. We still have some time alone, and I want us to make the most of it." With a grace and fluidity of motion befitting a dancer she slid off me; nodding back towards the bathroom we had left not long ago. She didn't bother to wait for me to get up as she walked towards it; a sultry saunter in her step as a very suggestive mental image popped into the forefront of my mind.

Shakily I stood up, taking a deep breath as I followed her back…