7 April 1931
"Well now little Lily, let's be having you."
Lily looked up and inwardly groaned at the sight of Dr Bellamy's smiling face. It wasn't that she didn't think him a kind man, but he seemed to take eternal pleasure in speaking to her as though she were still a child rather than a grown woman. In her younger years it had seemed endearing, but as she rapidly aged, it became less endearing and more irritating, especially as she couldn't help but think that if she were a wife and mother, he wouldn't address her so.
Following him into his examining room, she took a seat in the uncomfortable chair next to his desk and wished, not for the first time, that more women were doctors. She knew it wasn't a popular opinion but, somehow, seeking assistance from a man for something that only afflicted a woman seemed faintly ridiculous.
"Now, what's the trouble?" Dr Bellamy asked, sitting down at his desk and leaning forwards expectantly.
"Well it's…" she paused and took a breath, resigning herself to just getting it all out into the open and trying to spare herself any embarrassment. "It's my cycle. It's been…erratic of late."
"I see," he nodded sympathetically. "How erratic, would you say?"
"Very. I can't really predict it. 'aven't been able to for the last few months now."
"Uh huh…when it does come, it is light or heavy?"
"It varies."
"Any pain?"
"Some." She waited whilst he flicked through the papers that she could only presume made up her medical records. "Sometimes a strong brew 'elps but other times…"
"Why don't you get yourself up onto the bed and let's take a look at you," he said, smiling warmly at her. Somewhat reluctantly, Lily rose to her feet and crossed the small room over to the bed in the corner. Slipping off her shoes, she climbed onto it and lay back. Moments later, he towered over her, regarding her carefully. "Now, if you wouldn't mind, just lifting your blouse and lowering the waist of your skirt for me slightly…that's good, thank you."
He started pressing gently down on her abdomen, moving across from side to side and up and down, alternatively pressing and tapping and listening for something she couldn't even begin to imagine. As he examined her, she couldn't help but wonder what he thought of her. Did he think it strange that she had never married, had never borne a child? Did he find her odd or lacking in some way? Or had such thoughts never crossed his mind? Perhaps she was too guilty of thinking that everyone in Darrowby had an opinion of her.
"Well I can't hear that there's anything wrong," he said finally, stepping back. "You can get dressed now. Is there anything causing you particular concern at the moment? Something that may have started around the time you noticed the change in your cycle?"
She sat back down in the chair, "No, not really…"
"Are you sure? Often these things can be linked to a woman's emotional state."
"I'm not…I'm not emotional," she said. It seemed like the truth. If anything, she felt dead inside.
"And things are all right up at the farm?"
"Yes."
"How's your father?"
"Oh…'e's fine. Same as always. Keeping busy."
"Mmmmm…." He regarded her carefully. "Well, I can't see that there's anything particularly wrong or anything that I could give you. Perhaps if you were able to identify any situations that might give rise to anxiety or stress and try to avoid those, that might help. Come back and see me in a few months if things haven't improved."
"Thank you," she said, getting to her feet, albeit unconvinced he had done anything to help her.
"Lovely to see you again little Lily," he joked with a wink and she forced a smile onto her face before turning and leaving the room, making sure to make payment prior to leaving the surgery.
Stepping out into the fresh morning air, she took in a large lungful and let it out slowly, closing her eyes as she did so. She couldn't help but wonder if the entire visit had been a mistake. What exactly had she expected him to do for her anyway? She knew there was no magic cure for her situation, well, no cure in Darrowby anyway. In truth, the visit had been more of an excuse than anything else. A chance to get away from the farm and be amongst other people. Even walking the village streets speaking to no-one had to be better than being alone in a silent farmhouse.
The weather had slightly improved in the last few weeks, the threat of snow gone with the rise in temperature and yet the wind could still chill depending on what direction you faced and yet she found the whip of it against her skin more invigorating than anything else.
As she crossed the road and made to pass Skeldale House on her way to the bus stop, she found herself thinking again about Siegfried Farnon. She hadn't seen him since the last morning he had come to check on the horses, there being no immediate animal problems at Windy Hill. Though she had attended church religiously every Sunday, her father was always keen to spirit her back to the farm immediately afterwards, rather than allow her any sort of conversation with anyone. On occasion, she had found herself pondering what it must be like to be a vet, to be able to spend so much time with animals. It was certainly a profession that would require a great deal of intelligence, more than she could ever hope to have.
As she passed the front door of the house, it suddenly flew open and the man in question appeared, dressed in a white coat and looking somewhat harassed. Instinctively, she found herself stopping and staring up at him as he stood regarding her from the top of the steps.
"Mr Farnon?"
"Miss Bailey," he greeted her in response. "How are you? I trust you're well?"
"Yes, well I…"
"I wonder…would you mind…?"
She paused at the sudden change in direction of the conversation. "Would I mind what?"
"Well…I…" he gestured behind him towards the open door. "I can't seem to locate Mrs Hall you see, and I could use…well…some assistance."
"Assistance?"
"Yes, yes, will you come?"
"I…" before she could proffer a proper answer, he turned and hurried back through the open door and she felt she had little option but to follow. It had been years since she had been inside Skeldale House, the last time occasioned by a need to take the farm cat to be looked at by Mr Grant and that had been a good ten years earlier. As she closed the door behind her, she couldn't help thinking fondly of the cat, Powder, and suddenly felt an acute sense of loss sweep over here. For a moment, she stood alone in the hallway until he suddenly appeared from the room to her right which she recalled being an examination room.
"Ah, thank you. I appreciate this."
"Appreciate what?" she asked as he moved past her, bending down and looking under the sideboard and round the side of the door. "What is it I can help you with?"
"Well…" he turned back to face her again. "I appear to have mislaid a rabbit."
"A rabbit."
"Yes, a black rabbit named Winston. He belongs to a lovely little girl from the village and he came in yesterday with a sore leg and now appears to have hopped off somewhere on it. I'm hoping he must be somewhere in this house because if he's managed to get outside, Lord knows we'll never find him."
She glanced around, "And Audrey's not 'ere to 'elp you look?"
"No, she appears to have disappeared off somewhere and…" he paused. "I'm sorry, do you think it improper?"
"Improper?"
"Well, being alone in the house with me, with no chaperone. I confess such things don't bother me but I'm not ignorant enough to consider they might not bother others. Your father, for example."
At his somewhat old-fashioned notion of propriety, Lily had found herself starting to smile, but the mention of her father caused it to fade from her face again. She could only imagine his views on the subject and he had been none too enamoured at her insistence on going to see the doctor in the first place. Part of her knew that she should decline to help and get back to Windy Hill as fast as she could, but another part of her welcomed the slight deviation in an otherwise dreary routine. "What me father don't know won't 'urt 'im," she replied, taking off her hat and gloves and laying them on the side. "Where would you like me to start looking?"
"Thank you," he said, relief spreading across his face. "Would you mind looking upstairs? I'm not entirely convinced how far he may have been able to hop but one never knows."
Before she could reply, he had bounded off in the opposite direction and she found herself standing alone at the bottom of the stairs, the only sound coming from the ticking clock in the corner. Though she had found his view of propriety amusing, it seemed somewhat of a different matter altogether to venture upstairs in a man's home. But given how the day appeared to be turning out, she elected to throw caution to the wind and slowly climbed the stairs.
The doors to the rooms above were open, as were the windows, clearly designed to circulate air and as she walked slowly along the upper hallway, she peered inside each one in turn, wondering to herself which room belonged to which occupant. Audrey's room at the top of the stairs was the easiest to identify. It had a vague femininity about it and so she didn't feel too intrusive going inside and looking under the bed, behind the table and the door and around the side of the wardrobe. The second bedroom was clearly a spare, no sign of life within either human or animal. The third room, she could only surmise was Siegfried's. A clean suit hung over the wardrobe door with a pair of shined shoes beneath. On the table by the bed were a collection of books, the titles of which she didn't recognise. She paused at the door, feeling all too suddenly as though it really would be improper to enter. The only man's bedroom she had ever been in was her father's and, somehow, that didn't really count.
"Any luck?!" Siegfried's voice suddenly came from the bottom of the stairs, causing her to jump.
"No, not yet." Hurriedly, she looked around the room before leaving it again and making her way back down to the ground floor.
"Blast!" he cursed from where he was pacing. "Where the devil is the damn thing?!"
"'ave you checked everywhere?"
"I've checked the surgery, the sitting room, the kitchen, the scullery…" he stopped suddenly. "Oh no."
"Oh no what?"
"The cats."
"Cats?" he turned and hurried away from her and curiosity forced her to follow him through the hallway, kitchen and scullery out to the back of the house and round the side to the shed. She watched as he pulled open the door and slid inside and she found herself following him. Inside, were a variety of animals in cages, either awaiting treatment or recovering from it. "Well they're all in cages," she observed.
"Yes, yes I realise that, but you never know…can you check over there please?" he replied, waving at her and gesturing to the far corner of the shed. She turned to follow his direction when something suddenly leapt across her foot and she let out a small cry. "What is it?"
"It looks like…" she bent down and lifted a small, black rabbit up into her arms. "Winston, I presume?"
"Oh, thank God…" Siegfried breathed. "Where have you been hiding then? And how did you even get out here?" He took the animal from her and gently stroked its back. "No harm done, it would appear, but we'd best check him over to make sure."
"We?" He had disappeared back out of the shed before she could elicit any further response from him and with no other option but to follow, she found herself back in the house and in the examination room where Winston was now on the table and Siegfried was checking him over carefully. "What's wrong with 'is leg?"
"Well his owner said that he had jumped off of a table and landed strangely," he explained. "Clearly he's a rabbit that likes adventure. This leg feels a little…" he paused and looked up at her. "Come and see what you think?"
"Me?" she laughed. "I'm not a vet."
"Come and see anyway," he encouraged her. "You did find him after all." Though she couldn't help but think that her part in the affair had been far from significant, Lily found herself moving over to the table and standing in front of him. "Have a feel of his leg, that one there," he gestured. "Can you feel it?"
She gently ran her hand down Winston's front leg and noticed a sharp, bony sensation almost halfway down. "Yes, it feels as though something's not right anyway. Like it might be broken?"
"Yes, exactly."
"'ow do you treat it?"
"Well a cast should hopefully suffice, a small one, naturally given he's not a large animal. A splint would be too much, I think. Can you pass me the tape over there please?"
As though she were in some sort of dream, Lily found herself assisting him in ministering to Winston, handing him things when he asked for them and holding the creature when needed. The whole process only took what seemed like a few minutes and, once done, Winston burrowed himself close to her chest.
"I think he likes you," Siegfried said.
"What's going on 'ere then?" Turning, Lily say Audrey standing in the doorway, regarding them curiously.
"Ah, Mrs Hall, there you are!" he exclaimed before Lily could say anything. "Well I don't know where the devil you've been…"
"I were at the post office."
"Well, I managed to somehow lose Winston and it was only through Miss Bailey's help that we retrieved him. I dread to think what might have happened had she not been passing when she was."
"I'm sure you would 'ave found 'im yourself," Lily said, handing him back to Siegfried and watching as he placed him carefully in a cage on the shelf.
"No, I rather fear I would have overlooked him in my agitation," he insisted. "I'm very grateful, thank you."
"You'll 'ave a brew?" Audrey said, taking off her coat.
"Oh…no, thank you. I really should be getting back. Me dad'll be wondering where I've got to. I said I'd only be an 'our."
"One cup won't 'urt, will it?"
"No, really, I should go. I've already missed one bus and I don't want to miss another."
"We can't have you taking the bus," Siegfried said. "I'll drive you back."
"Oh…" she paused at his offer, "oh, you don't 'ave to do that."
"Well it's the least I can do if you won't accept a cup of tea," he insisted, shrugging off his white coat. "And if you're concerned as to your timekeeping it would be much swifter than waiting for the next bus."
There was sense in his logic and Lily found herself nodding in agreement. "As long as it's not too much trouble."
"It's no trouble at all. Mrs Hall, I shall be back in due course."
"Make sure you come to our meeting next week, Lily," Audrey said, catching her arm gently as she made to pass. "We've missed seeing you these last months."
"I will," she lied, "thank you."
XXXX
The drive home from the village was very pleasant. Siegfried talked about the animals that he currently had in the surgery and spoke of some of the calls he had made recently and Lily found herself laughing along with him at some of the more lurid tales. She couldn't help but feel somewhat at ease in his company, though she wasn't sure why, and felt almost genuinely disappointed when Windy Hill came into view.
"You'll have to come back to the surgery some day and help me out," he said cheerfully as the car made its way up the hill.
"I'm not exactly qualified."
"Nonsense, you live on a farm. You must have some affinity with animals. Winston certainly took a liking to you in any event."
"I suppose so," she said, looking out at the cows in the field and feeling somewhat embarrassed that she knew nothing about them or how to care for them, or indeed any animal. "I 'ad a cat when I were younger. Powder. Doted on 'er, but after she died, me dad said there were no point in replacing 'er."
"Couldn't you get another one now, if you wanted to?"
"I don't think 'e'd be too 'appy about that."
"It wouldn't be solely his decision, would it?"
She could tell what he was driving at and she felt herself shift uncomfortably in the seat. You're a grown woman, he was saying, why can't you make your own decisions? Fortunately, they pulled into the yard at that point and she was prevented from having to say anything more on the subject. "Thank you for the lift, it were very kind of you to offer."
"Well, as I said, it was the least that I could do. Thank you for assisting me."
"I'm not sure 'ow much 'elp I really was."
"A tremendous help, I can assure you. The fact that Winston is safe and well, and I don't have to explain to some poor child that I've lost him, is of immense relief."
"I suppose it wouldn't look too good if the local vet lost one of his patients."
"No, it wouldn't. Not whilst I'm still trying to establish myself in Darrowby."
"You seem to be doing all right so far, from what I 'ear anyway."
He pinked slightly and looked away, "Well, that's very kind of you to say, thank you."
She opened her mouth to say something more, but her father suddenly appeared from one of the sheds and, upon seeing them in the car together, drew his brows together in a frown of disapproval. "I should go, thank you again." Before he could say anything, she opened the door and stepped out.
"Oh aye," Tom said, advancing towards them. "What's all this then?"
"Ah, Mr Bailey," Siegfried said, "I was just returning your daughter safely to you. She helped me out with a tricky situation earlier and I couldn't have her standing waiting for a bus."
"What situation might this be?" Tom asked, his gaze boring into her own. "Thought you were going to the doctor?"
"I did," she replied, "I…"
"The doctor?" Siegfried broke in and his expression grew suddenly concerned. "I'm sorry, I had no idea. If I'd known you were unwell, I wouldn't have asked…"
"I'm not unwell," she replied hurriedly. "Mr Farnon just asked me to help him look for a lost rabbit, Dad, that's all."
"Is it now?" Tom glared at them both in turn. "Well, lunch won't make itself now, will it?"
"No, no it won't. Good day Mr Farnon," she turned back to him, smiling as brightly as she could. "And thank you again."
"No, thank you," he echoed, as she hurried away inside. Removing her coat, hat and gloves she lifted her apron from behind the door and tied it around her waist before moving over to the stove. As she did so, she glanced out of the window to see her father and Siegfried involved in some sort of conversation. Moments later, Tom moved away, and she caught Siegfried's eye. He raised his hand in a gesture of farewell and she smiled tightly before turning away.
For the new few moments, she busied herself preparing the midday meal, only to suddenly hear footsteps behind her and, turning, saw her father framed in the doorway. "Shouldn't take long," she said cheerfully. "Why don't you wash up?"
"You're a good lass, our Lily," he said, moving over to the sink. "Don't go forgetting that now."
"No," she sighed, "no, I won't."
