Never before had I fallen from such a great height, nor "caught so much air." With the exception of the tower at Hadley's Hope power station, I had never even been that high above the ground.

Plunging backwards through the air, I found the view fascinating, but terrifying: Spreading blue-pink candy colored sky, peppered with swarms of aeroplankton...and what appeared to be flying catfish, possibly a barracuda, and, above it all, the explosions of something like fireworks.

More terrifying than the fall itself: The realization that, as I had been struck by a falling object, I had lost consciousness for an unspecified period of time, hastening my descent to the very hard and unyielding ground.

In a blind panic, I flailed my arms at the rapidly passing cliff face, clawing at anything within reach. Loose chunks of dirt, rocks, decaying plant matter, crumbled and fell away at my touch.

Hard to get closer when I had no ground to push off from. I reached too far and flipped end over end.

An overhanging piece of coral struck me in the face. I lashed out with my claws, caught hold of a projecting lip of granite, which wobbled unsteadily like a loose tooth the moment my weight got applied.

Not pleasant for my arm, either. It...appeared I had dislocated it somewhat. Probably would have felt worse if I had a skeleton on the inside.

I struggled for purchase, digging at the rocks and associated features of the outcrop with my claws, scratching into the dirt and crevices. I found slight footholds, not enough to stand upon, but something I could at least dig my toe claws into.

My digits penetrated a gooey purple egg. As slime oozed all over my claw, a mass of flying insects came shrieking out, spraying me with a bleachy smelling substance that immediately caused my exoskeleton to smoke and burn.

I scratched sideways along the mountain, rubbing dirt into my shell in attempts to stop the burning. A pattern like that of a Death's Head Moth glowed on their wings as they pelted me again and again with more burning slime.

I growled and swatted them, feeling like King Kong atop the Empire State Building.

My escape pod whistled by, snapping blades off my spine as it dropped to the rocky floor below.

I clawed my way sideways along that rock wall, batting away the stinging insects the best I could with one arm, and my feet propped up on loose, crumbly rocks.

I expected the pod to make spectacular noise when it touched down, but, upon striking the rubble strewn soil at the bottom, its sound reminded me more of a refrigerator being thrown on a garbage heap. A hollow `thunk,' followed by the low-key crunch of its wall panels breaking off. The glass made no sound as it shattered and spread upon the cracked, arid dirt.

A flaming piece of spaceship debris cut through the swarm as it dropped through the air. Half a crew locker, by the looks of it: A flight suit, boots, an adult magazine flew up from its interior.

I ducked sideways to dodge a burning cafeteria table and its attached chairs, winced as a baseball, then a large computer hard drive, struck me in the skull.

I pressed my body tight against the rocks as more of the flaming wreck dropped down, a bed, an incomplete resistance trainer machine. The insects continued to spray me with chemicals.

I glanced down. Still not safe. I estimated I still had about a five story drop to the ground.

A small cave, no more than two feet at its mouth, lay around the corner. Out of desperation, I ducked into the thing.

Barely enough room to crawl, let alone stand up. No room to turn around.

I only crawled forward out of necessity, to avoid the insects and fiery spaceship parts.

A horrific roaring noise erupted from the dark. A mass of hair and teeth launched itself at me, clawing and tearing at my face.

Startled, I jumped back...and...ran out of cave.

As I fell shrieking off the side of the mountain, I at last caught a glimpse of my foe:The white, furry creature fairly resembled a puppet from a Jim Henson movie, minus eyeballs and baring two sets of lion-like teeth.

I crashed on a rock shelf, spine first.

I had a stunning view of a massive, smoldering section of bulkhead dropping from the air. I had to sit up quickly and hug the rock wall.

Weak from my injuries, and just the barest of nourishment, I swayed unsteadily, ready to fall at any given moment.

A deafening `crack' sound as the bulkhead smashed into the shelf, dislodging it from its ancient sedimentary moorings. The shelf dropped off the mountain, the bulkhead smoking as it followed it down. A jutting strip of metal tore into my shell, etching a jagged line down my back.

And the insects sprayed me again.

I flinched as the hairy thing roared at me from its little cave.

I distended my jaw, flashing my jaw, flashing my interior set of fangs in a threatening manner.

The creature, having literally no eyes, merely froze and sniffed the air.

Downward I scrambled, dodging the rain of debris and the attacks of insects, fiercely gripping anything that had a remote resemblance to a facet.

I lunged for some projecting rocks. They broke off the instant I put my weight upon them.

Nothing soft below me, just the bulkhead with jagged pieces of metal sticking out, ready to impale me.

Having fallen quite enough already, I didn't shriek this time, only briefly gasped at once again facing my imminent demise.

I madly clawed the rocks, scuttling sideways, slipped and fell down an inclined rock shelf.

I found myself sliding uncontrollably down a grade.

A hard, uncomfortable ride through grit and gravel that kicked up immense clouds of dust and dirt.

I hit a rock, flew up into the air, rolled down a rocky incline.

At last, bleeding and bruised, aching from injuries to multiple areas of the body, and near fainting from exhaustion, I collapsed at the base of a large boulder.

"Squeak!" a soft, tiny object landed on my head. Irritating, pattering claws, a little tail that flicked across my face.

As I feebly reached up to remove the pest from my head, it squeaked loudly at something unrelated to my scary black claws.

The sky dimmed like a solar eclipse. When I looked up, I discovered what all the squeaking was about:

A massive section of the Sulaco's hull, bearing down upon me like a giant's fist.

No time to get out of the way. Not from something that size. I could only brace myself and prepare to be flattened like a pancake.

[0000]

Quacebs, Book 2: Part 4

[0000]

Dan stared at me when I stood up and emptied the dust pan. "I realize you missed Halloween..."

I cringed. Intellectually, I knew I'd been away a long time, but to hear it verbally, when I had left the earth when NFL playoffs had barely begun..."Ummm...Dad, it's...not for Halloween."

That's when he noticed the extra guests. Barely containing his mirth, he blurted, "Who are your friends?"

Quana got up from the table, bowing and offering her hand. "Hi. I'm Quana. Sarah."

"It's Quana Falcameer," I explained. "She just goes by Sarah because it's easier for people to remember."

Quana's cheeks turned a bit green. "Old habits die hard." She asked in Wava if it were all right to mention being a princess. I shook my head.

I introduced Dista, omitting the royal servant part. The dog growled from behind Dad's leg.

Quana and Dista resumed their places at the table.

Mom scoffed. "Matt was just telling me his friends are from outer space."

"They are," I stammered.

Dad took a deep breath, casting Mom a questioning look.

Camille put her hands on her hips. "Fuzzy, don't you understand that people made up that stuff about aliens and UFO's so people will stop believing in God and angels? They'll hear the trumpet call of God and say, `Oh that's just a flying saucer!'"

Dista stared at the princess in puzzlement.

Quana gave her a shrug. "Oh no, Mrs. Gannon! I live in a flying saucer, and I'd definitely know the difference between a flying saucer and an angel calling me."

"Quana," I hissed. "Yichihib nuxteb (1)!"

"Matt, hib picdalo wagfumteb hua yihib qiolqako! Feut giumidacik yisnaa xelhu hib ip Abreya, ruhd mogza yigiwi kojiti (2)!"

I sighed.

Candy scampered up to me, sniffing my alien shoes and Grunkiahu leather pants. It took her a moment to recognize me, but then she wagged her tail and put her paw on me, to be petted.

Dista and Quana muttered to each other.

Camille stared as they said grace...in Wava...She pretended not to notice.

Remembering Mom's call about the tooth abstraction, I pried the dog's mouth open. Sure enough, she had a missing fang.

"I had to give her soft food for two weeks," Mom said.

The dog left me to sniff my companions...and search the floor for crumbs.

Dan grinned and mussed my hair. "Matt...I should have known you'd find someone with the same wacky sense of humor as yours. I'm glad you found yourself a girlfriend. I was beginning to get worried about you."

Quana grinned at me. "I'm glad I found him too. Mister Gannon, we actually came here because of that reason. You see, Matt just—"

"Yigloan, Quana (4)!"

"Kai tiks giwi chijitanar (5)?"

I frowned. "Hua...hua yigazu. Gloan yigibetib fuecago kuglteb bea Abreya miotam (6)."

"Matt, chikalat shnarf cib mese wocanwa, jupe ardunbe gutico mesenehloqo (7)!" She smiled nervously at Dan, fingering her engagement band in a way that...didn't exactly draw his attention away from it.

Camille cast Quana a scolding look. "Young lady, I don't mind if you act silly, but don't make jokes about our Lord!"

"Oh no, Mrs. Gannon! I'd never do that!" With her face flushing green, Quana got up from the table, head low, arms behind her back as she addressed my mom. "Mrs. Gannon, I love Jesus! I wouldn't be here in this kitchen if I didn't! Your son taught me everything about the Lord!"

Dista stared in disbelief at what she witnessed, covered her mouth to conceal her amusement.

"...I admire how faithful and dedicated your family is to Jesus, and how you adopted him and helped him to grow into an amazing Christian! In fact, that's why—"

I blushed. "Quana, Hua gazu chihib keufudo, jupe huayi pumcko ruhd hib bea kehag zaib (8)!"

Quana's face turned a deeper shade of green. "Matt, tiks hib bea kehag zaib guv pebeqai (9)?"

Camille glanced at Quana and laughed. "Boy is your face green! How are you doing that?"

"By blushing," Quana mumbled."Anyway, as I was saying, I actually believe the very same things you do—"

"Yipebe Ponai," I warned. "Pebe God, kai decabya bea Wava. Kai yok raleg gurabo bri-explosion ha bri-amino acid (10)."

Dista...gave me this look like I had just given a profound sermon. I thought I saw her taking out her communicator, perhaps to take notes...but then the dog pawed on her for petting.

Quana clenched her fists, snapping her tail. "Matt, hib ceiogefa wocapaga (11)."

"Juz, chigac hanne bea dalotar nato hua (12)."

She flashed her buckteeth and pecked me on the cheek. "Biofa! Bea narun bisa hua mogzkuse! Higazu ge'l biofa (13)!"

For a moment, Dan and Camille got this surprised, but utterly pleased expression on their faces, you know, because for once I had an actual girl kissing me, and they didn't have to wonder if I were straight. Of course, still not totally sold on the alien bit.

To explain how serious she was, Quana gave my mom a paraphrase of the Apostle's Creed, to explain what she believed. "Schnarf loex?" she said to me. "Hua yipebeqai algotfomu coz Sketadak (14)."

Camille scoffed. "But you also believe in flying saucers."

I decided to take the diplomatic approach. "It's not a core belief that we need to divide over. I mean, you know, people believe different things about infant baptism and speaking in tongues..."

Quana narrowed her eyes at me. "Core belief! Chik wagfumteb jiaz hua pagatayux ip Abreya hib gajfai yabacwa nubua chib kogelo'h hei qiol sejucore aduk nato ip heswen (15)!"

"They're not going to believe it, Quana, trust me on this!"

Sighing through her nose, Quana grabbed my tunic. "Sorry, Wusu. I think they need another visual illustration, and I'm not taking off my top."

And then I'm standing shirtless in front of Mom.

Dista, despite having a squirming dog in her arms, still gaped at me.

Honestly, I did think my hairy pelt would be rather convincing. I let Mom examine me, allowing her to pick at it to make sure it was genuine.

Dan grabbed a clump, and plucked a few hairs.

"Ouch!"

He jerked back in surprise. "Wow. What the hell did they do to you?"

Mom nonverbally asked the same question. "Okay...I know you didn't buy that outfit. I'm not sure I believe you went to outer space, but I definitely thing something unusual has happened to you, and maybe you should see a doctor about it."

Quana ran a finger through the fur on my chest in a semi-flirtaceous manner. "It's nothing to worry about, Mrs. Gannon. Where I come from, everyone looks like that."

Mom was at a loss for words.

At last, though..."Well...I guess you did say grace before you ate..." She stared at me for a moment, then clicked her tongue, shaking her head. "Oh not you too."

I frowned. "What."

"You pierced your ears. Please tell me you haven't pierced anything else."

I chuckled. "I didn't do it willingly."

"She made you do this?"

"It wasn't her. I got trapped in an alien zoo. This is what they did to track me."

"Oh." she didn't buy it.

Quana fingered my earlobe. "I can fix that piercing, you know."

"You can?"

"Yeah. Back at the ship I have a Varot. I can't do that much about the scars, though." She held up her wrist, showing me the scar I caused while attempting to cut her out of a webbing coccoon. "This one still hasn't disappeared."

My stomach flip flopped. Still felt guilty about that, despite all she put me through. "Maybe I'll keep my piercing. It might be a good witnessing tool."

Quana smiled, raising her wrist. "I was thinking the same thing."

"You think I'd look good with an earring?"

Quana giggled. "You already have." She hugged me. "Just in case you change your mind, we have some very good...cosmetic surgeons on Pathilon."

Camille put her hands on her hips. "I hope you haven't been trying to tell people that Jesus has some kind of connection to flying saucers. We have enough cults out in the world as it is."

"Told you she wasn't going to believe it," I whispered.

"Let me try!"

I groaned. "Ruhd hib qiol soisofu, Quana (16)!"

"Guep, jupe gibet derako giwi riko qiol (17)!"

Dista, in the meantime, had gobbled all the bacon on her plate. Not sure how she kept it away from the dog. She liked bacon so much that she now stood at the kitchen counter, grabbing some more from a grease catching paper towel.

Dan stared at me. "Son, what is this strange language you're speaking?"

"It's called Wava. Constructed language...Kinda like Klingon."

"Klingon!" Quana hissed at me. "Stop lying!"

Dan nodded in approval. "At least you've found someone who speaks your language."

Camille didn't look so amused. "Should we be...encouraging this?"

"He could have done worse. It sounds like we might be seeing this young lady in church sometime."

Quana nodded. "Oh yes! I'd love that!" But then, to me, "Feut qiol narun oalesa hua dalopae riko fetmai de tibu soisofu (18)!"

"Quana, huahib lum pebeteb higazu viravo ucuk con gibet, jiaz chik gazu viravo ucuk con soisofu rua (19)!"

"Feut shnarf hib midasu, yigiwi chik subecosu feut hua jaii ruhd!" She stepped between my parents. "Mister and Mrs. Gannon, I'm going to speak on his behalf: I'm actually an alien from outer space, but if you can't accept that, that's okay, he's right, we shouldn't divide about unimportant things. I still admire how serious you are about your faith. That's why I love your son so much. You see, we didn't come to your house just to say dusaq and eat breakfast—"

I reached up to cup my hand over her lips.

Dista, who had been reaching into the skillet for another piece of bacon, accidentally burned herself when she noticed what I was doing. She waved her hand and stuck her finger in her mouth.

"Matt," Quana growled. "If you cover my mouth, I'm going to bite your hand. You saw me at Nabal's wedding. I don't take kindly to Abreyas gagging me."

She said it in English. With my face hot, I put my hand to my side.

I actually heard Dista giggle this time.

""We have an announcement to make..." Quana blushed, muttering to me, "Kreah hib bea bri lajuje-human sajareda coz ruhd boqotaii (21)?"

I swallowed. "I dunno, you're the one who barged ahead!" I broke in a cold sweat as my eyes darted from my mom to my dad. "I...uh...just proposed to her, and she said yes."

Quana flashed her buckteeth, proudly displaying her engagement ring.

My parents appeared to be too horrified for speech. They just gaped at me.

At least, for a moment.

"Well!" Camille breathed. "That's a little sudden, don't you think? Exactly how long have you known this girl?"

Dan seemed to take the news a little better. "Honey, he's always been a shy kid. I admit this girl is...a little...unique, but he could have picked worse...So she's a little obsessed with fantasy movies. She's Christian, seems well mannered enough...who knows, she might be good for him. Must be pretty special to break him out of his shell..."

Quana gave me an incredulous stare. "I didn't know you hatched!"

Dan and Camille exchanged knowing smirks.

"That's just an expression."

I thought Quana seemed...almost excited by the thought, but now...disappointment. "A pity. It would have explained so much."

"Quana," said Camille. "My husband and I need to speak to your fiancee alone for a few minutes, if you don't mind."

She gulped, turning green. "Do you want me to leave the house?"

"Oh no. Just stay in the kitchen. We'll be in the living room. Be just a few minutes."

Quana stared in worriment. "If you don't want us to marry, Mrs. Gannon, I understand. But I really do love him, and I wouldn't mind spending the rest of my life with him, and having you as my in-lawyer."

Camille chortled, but forced a serious face. "We'll see."

I followed Mom and Dad into the living room, took a seat on the couch. Mom and Dad faced me in the armchairs. It felt like a police interrogation.

"Look, Fuzzy. I know you're an adult, and we can't tell you how to live your life, but I don't think you should rush into a marriage, especially with some girl you met at a Star Trek convention."

I never told her about the convention. I think she just made the assumption.

"It does seem a little sudden," Dan agreed. "I see guys around the church all the time that rush to get married, and it only turns out to be puppy love and they're stuck with someone they don't like. I know it's tough for someone shy like you, but I do think you should try to play the field a little more."

"The thought has crossed my mind," I admitted. "Her mom said the same thing. But there's so many events and things...stuff we've been through together, it just feels like God is putting us together."

"That's what those other people tend to say when they jump into marriages."

"Yeah, but me and Quana, we're working toward the same goal, it's the same mission, mission field. We're reaching the same people. We, uh...started a little house church together."

Dan stared at Camille. "This sounds serious."

Mom just shook her head. "With those funny costumes?"

"I've heard of worse gimmicks."

Mom seemed to agree that it was a good gimmick. "I don't know...I'm just afraid that when the honeymoon is over and she lets her hair down, you're going to be miserable. I mean, how well do you really know this girl?"

The question gave me pause. To be fair, Quana and I hadn't spent that much time together..."I trust her with my life. I was...imprisoned during my trip, and she got me out. She brought me food when I was starving and didn't know what I was going to eat. She's taken me to amazing places...on our trip...She got me to share Jesus with a bunch of strangers...I don't really see myself being with anyone else." I picked at my furry chest. "Especially now that I look like this."

Worried looks passed between my parents.

"I know I'm going to regret asking this," Camille said. "But...What exactly happened on that trip? You were gone a long time!"

I told her an abbreviated version of the whole mess.

About a quarter of the way through, Quana crept into the room with her breakfast, Dista trailing behind...I tried not to notice Dista chomping off the end of a basted dog biscuit.

"Is it okay to come out, or are you still having a discussion?"

Mom resignedly waved her and her servant to the couch. Then, when she noticed the food, she rushed Quana a TV tray to put it on.

Dista, in the meantime, had eaten enough of the dog treat for Mom to not recognize what she had. "You find some cookies in there?...I didn't think we had any left."

I tried to keep a straight face. "She...must have brought it along with her."

"Try not to leave any crumbs. I just vacuumed."

Anyway, I told her the rest of the story. Camille understandably had difficulty accepting it, even with the others backing up my story. Actually, it made it worse. Dan withheld his comments for one reason or another.

Quana curled her tail around mine, putting her arm around me as we talked.

Long time to be sitting and telling such a yarn. I stretched and stood up.

"Oh!" Camille cried with a frustrated tone. "There's hair all over the place now!" She went about brushing off the seat cushions with her a small dust broom.

Both I and Quana apologized. I mean, she'd left hair on the sofa too.

Camille gave me a sheepish grin. "It's okay, kiddo. Your mother is just going crazy."

"Well, it's not every day that your son sheds fur on the sofa."

"That's very true."

"Here," Quana bent over the couch to help her clean the hair off.

"No, please don't help. You're dropping more hair." Mom gave up the endeavor, sitting back down.

"Well, I saw the pictures Keith sent me. They don't look like buttons or pie plates. But I don't know...It's still hard to swallow."

I nodded. "It's a little hard for anyone to believe, if you don't see it up close yourself..."

I gave Quana a questioning glance, nonverbally asking permission.

She grinned, squeezing my hand.

"Do you have time to go on a little trip?"

"I suppose so. Will this take long?"

"Probably not more than an hour. She's kinda far out in Kansas, but we're not actually going to space right now, so..."

Mom only laughed. "Sounds like you guys got a good show ready for me."

"Show?" Quana blinked. "I..."

I groaned and rubbed my face. "Not really."

"Well, that's a disappointment."

Dad brought out his digital camera. "Whose car are we taking?"

"Mine, I guess," I said. "I know how to get there. We got barely just enough room, if we squish."

I let them all into my car...Had to clean up the back, though. Mom got the front seat.

"Great. I'm stuck in the back with the ladies," Dan said in a mock grumble. "You getting jealous, honey?"

"Oh yeah," Camille scoffed. "My husband is about to be carried off by a couple attractive space women he's just barely met!"

Dista looked puzzled, but Quana snickered at the comment.

We drove past a stone church with a big stained glass window.

"Is that where you and Matt have services?"

"No, they're Presbyterian. We go to Saint Paul's."

"It's another denomination."

"What's a denomination?"

I rubbed my forehead in frustration. "I guess I never did tell you...There's different types of Christian churches that believe different things."

"What do they believe?"

"Honestly...don't know. It's kinda confusing. I guess they're kinda like Lutherans, but I don't especially like the services." I had to explain what denominations and Lutheran meant.

"I'm surprised you don't know about that," Mom said. "What country did you say you came from?"

"Bencap."

Mom frowned.

Dan leaned toward her. "I think is probably part of the act...Costumes and everything."

"It's not very funny."

He sat back down. "Does anyone else smell bandages and super glue?"

I cringed. "Dad...uh...that's their natural...musk."

Dad scoffed at this, but said nothing.

"So both of you are teachers?" Quana asked.

"Yes, and, like I said, you're lucky it's planning week."

Quana asked several very basic questions about their occupations, and how they did them. Things a human should know. My parents humored her.

"What's it like being a teacher?"

Mom laughed.

Dad puffed air out his cheeks. "Whew, it's tough. Difficult to keep kids occupied, especially when they're always playing on their phones. A few times when I've been a substitute, I've had kids literally throwing stuff at me. Being a lunchroom monitor isn't a piece of cake either. Hard to keep all those kids under control."

Mom leaned over her seat and smiled at my fiancee. "I agree that being a substitute is difficult. They say some nasty hurtful things when the teacher isn't available, and they don't want to pay attention. But, you know, afterwards, I've heard the best compliments. One teacher told me they actually liked it when I was substitute, and missed me when I was gone."

"Is it...a good paying job?"

Both my parents chuckled.

"You saw the house, didn't you?"

"You really got to love what you're doing. We wouldn't have stayed in it so long if we were in it for the money."

"A shame. Teachers are much more respected where I come from."

The comment mildly amused my parents, but I could tell they grew impatient with the `space alien act.'

"Did I tell you the power went out?" Mom asked me.

"Oh yeah. How long were you in the dark?"

"Oh, five days." She chuckled. "We did a lot of reading by candle light."

"We had to do all our work at the school," Dad added.

"Mrs. Gannon, what did you go over in your classes...before your break?"

Mom opened her mouth to reply, but at that moment my tire light came on.

"Uh...Fuzzy?" Mom pointed at the dash. "When's the last time you inflated your tires?"

I just shook my head. "It's been a few days, but that's the first time the light came on. Of course that thing lights up anytime I drop a notch below 35 PSI—"

That's when I heard a pop. The left side of the car sank down, and I heard that tell-tale whudda-whudda sound.

[0000]

Author's note: I have hundreds of pages of the Quaceb novel to get through, but the next section isn't ready for `prime time' yet. Let me know if you want to read more.

[0000]

Translations:

1. "Quana," I hissed. "You're not helping!"

2. "Matt, I'm tired of pretending I'm not who I am! If your parents can't accept I'm an alien, this marriage isn't going to work!"

4. "Not yet, Quana!"

5. "And when do you want to tell him, exactly?"

6. "I...I don't know. They're not completely sold on the Abreya thing yet."

7. "Matt, I love how you're so shy, but it can be so infuriating sometimes!"

8. "Quana, I know you're excited, but I don't think this is the right time!"

9. "When is a good time to mention it, Matt?" To Camille, she said, "I actually believe the very same things you do—"

10. "Don't say Ponai. Say God, and try to limit the Wava. And not that stuff about the explosion or amino acids."

11. Quana clenched her fists, snapping her tail. "Matt, I'm already nervous."

12. "C'mon, you got twice the guts I do."

13. "There's the male that proposed to me! I knew he was in there somewhere!"

14. "How's that? I didn't mention anything from the book of Sketadak (Genesis account from the Gaxea)."

15. "You're acting like me being an Abreya is a spiritual mystery when you've been on my planet for over a month!"

16. "This is my family, Quana!"

17. "Yes, but they're about to be mine!"

18. "If my male would encourage me to be part of his family!"

19. "Quana, I was only saying that I know how to speak to them, just like how you know how to speak to your family!"

20. "If that's really what you think, you won't mind if I do this!"

21. "What are the formal human words to say in this situation?"