Chapter 8

Snape's POV

As Bellatrix fell, with a scream of fury, The Dark Lord let out a blast of magic that sent me, Minerva, and Horace flying, I hit the ground hard enough to leave a bruise, but other than that, I was unharmed, I quickly checked that my allies where ok,

'Funny how just a few short hours ago I was the victim of Minerva's fury as she relentlessly hurled curse after curse at me, and now, here we were, fighting side by side. - the irony.'

I returned my focus to The Dark Lord, but before I could even think of raising myself of the ground, he had was pointing his wand at Molly Weasley.

'No!' -I thought desperately, as I watched the lethal cutting curse* shoot towards her,

Suddenly, a voice shouted "Protego!" and a powerful shield erupted out of nowhere in the middle of the hall, deflecting The Dark Lords curse.

I jerked in shock at the sound of that voice, I would recognize it anywhere, but it wasn't possible, potter was dead, he couldn't have been the one to cast the shield.

And yet, there he stood.

I barley registered the yells of shock, cheers, and screams around me, from every side came the cries of-

"Harry!"

"HE'S ALIVE!"

And then there was silence, as Potter turned toward Voldemort.

I staggered to my feet from where I had fallen, and stumbled towards the boy-

"Potter!?..."

"…how….?"

-all I could do was stutter incoherently. How was he alive? How had he fooled The Dark Lord into believing he was dead, and if he was in fact alive, what did it mean, after all he had to die so the piece of Voldemort's soul that lived in him…

"it's ok sir,"-Harry said,

-I just stared at him blankly, trying to comprehend the meaning in his words.

"it's gone, I… I did it, I don't know how, but… but I'm alive."

I blinked in shock, surly he didn't mean what I thought he did, was he implying that he had indeed sacrificed himself willingly so that Voldemort could be defeated, and that somehow, he had survived, and the piece of Voldemort had not?!

I scrutinized him for a second, but his expression was open and honest, very nearly desperate, desperate for me to believe him, his emerald gaze, so like Lily's had been…

my heart stuttered suddenly in my chest, and a flicker of relief and hope flamed up inside of me as I realized, that if Harry was speaking the truth, then I hadn't failed my promise to Lily.

Her son was alive!

And I was going to fight my damn hardest to keep him that way, I wouldn't fail Lily again.

I gave Harry a sharp nod to show him I understood (I couldn't keep lying to myself and comparing him to his arrogant father any longer, he wasn't the 'Potter' who had tormented me, he was Harry, still a Potter, but at the end he was simply Harry, I had just been to blind to see that until now).

I turned my back to him, so I facing my former master once again,

"You better be right Potter" I growled, without any of my usual bite, as he stepped forward to stand by my side.

silence fell abruptly and completely as Voldemort and Harry looked at each other, and began, at the same moment, to circle each other, I following Harry's lead not leaving his side.

"I don't want anyone else to try to help." he said loudly, and in the total silence his voice carried like a trumpet call.

"Even you Snape, stand down, It's got to be like this. It's got to be me."

Voldemort hissed,

-"Potter doesn't mean that," he said, his red eyes wide. "That isn't how he works, is it? Who are you going to use as a shield today, Potter?"

"Nobody," he replied simply.

I nearly snapped at the idiot boy, I was definitely not going to stand down, hadn't I sworn to protect him!?

I stepped back, but did not leave his side, I stood like a shadow behind me, like the silent protector I had always been, he may be the child of the prophesy, but that did not mean I was going to let him do this alone.

I listened as Voldemort and Harry taunted each over, as Harry explained how he had survived, and how all the horcruxes (so that was what they were called!) had been destroyed.

I silently followed Harry, as he and The Dark Lord circled around each other, waiting for the moment to strike, not interfering until I had to, until-

"Love is nothing! Your dear Severus loved your mother, but he couldn't prevent me from squishing the life out of her like the filthy Mudblood deserved…"

I flinched at that, unable to stop myself from reacting, for, after all, it was my fault, she was dead because of me, I tensed up, waiting for Harry to lose his temper and strike, but he didn't, that surprised me, for Harry was not known for his restraint, even I, gifted occlumens as I was, had a hard time controlling myself when Voldemort called Lily that… that word.

"The Elder Wand, the Deathstick, the Wand of Destiny is truly mine! Dumbledore's last plan went wrong, Harry Potter!"

I just managed to stop myself from scoffing at that, Voldemort was a fool.

"Yeah, it did," said Harry.

"You're right. But before you try to kill me, I'd advise you to think about what you've done. . . . Think, and try for some remorse, Riddle. . . ."

"What is this?" Of all the things that Harry had said to him, beyond any revelation or taunt, nothing had shocked Voldemort like this.

I saw his pupils contact to thin slits, saw the skin around his eyes whiten.

"It's your one last chance," said Harry,

"it's all you've got left. . . . I've seen what you'll be otherwise. . . . Be a man . . . try . . . Try for some remorse. . . ."

"You dare—?" said Voldemort.

"Yes, I dare," said Harry,

"because Dumbledore's last plan hasn't backfired on me at all. It's backfired on you, Riddle."

Voldemort's hand was trembling on the Elder Wand, and I gripped mine tighter, ready to help the reckless Gryffindor.

The moment, we knew, was seconds away.

"That wand still isn't working properly for you because you defeated the wrong person. Severus Snape was never the true master of the Elder Wand. He never defeated Dumbledore."

"He killed— "

"Aren't you listening? You said it yourself, killing, and defeating is not the same, and Snape never beat Dumbledore! Dumbledore's death was planned between them! Dumbledore intended to die undefeated, the wand's last true master! If all had gone as planned, the wand's power would have died with him, because it had never been won from him!"

"But then, Potter, Dumbledore as good as gave me the wand!" Voldemort's voice shook with malicious pleasure.

"I stole the wand from its last master's tomb! I removed it against its last master's wishes! It's power is mine!"

I shuddered in rage, 'how dare he…'-

"You still don't get it, Riddle, do you? Possessing the wand isn't enough! Holding it, using it, doesn't make it really yours.

Didn't you listen to Ollivander? The wand chooses the wizard. . . . The Elder Wand recognized a new master before Dumbledore died, someone who never even laid a hand on it. –"

My eyes widened in horror, 'No! he couldn't tell him! If the Voldemort knew that Draco was the master of the wand, he would hurt him, maybe even kill him for it, and then The Dark Lord truly would be unstoppable!'

"-The new master removed the wand from Dumbledore against his will, never realizing exactly what he had done, or that the world's most dangerous wand had given him its allegiance… "

"Potter, don't!" -I warned,

but he ignored me! The blasted boy was going to get us all killed.

Voldemort's chest rose and fell rapidly, and I could feel the curse coming, feel it building inside the wand pointed at Harry's face, I tensed and got ready to do whatever was necessary to defend Lily's son.

"The true master of the Elder Wand was Draco Malfoy."

I groaned; this would not end well-

"Foolish boy, he'll kill him now"-I muttered.

Blank shock had showed in Voldemort's face for a moment after the revelation, but then it was gone.

"But what does it matter?" he said softly.

"Even if you are right, Potter, it makes no difference to you and me. You no longer have the phoenix wand: We duel on skill alone . . . and after I have killed you, I can attend to Draco Malfoy. . . ."

"But you're too late," Harry said.

'What!?'

"You've missed your chance. I got there first. I overpowered Draco weeks ago. I took this wand from him." Harry twitched the wand he was holding, I stared at it.

It was, indeed Draco's wand, but that would mean… I gasped, and my mind went blank with shock.

"So it all comes down to this, doesn't it?" whispered Harry.

"Does the wand in your hand know its last master was Disarmed? Because if it does . . . I am the true master of the Elder Wand."

A red-gold glow burst suddenly across the enchanted sky above them as an edge of dazzling sun appeared over the sill of the nearest window.

The light hit all of our faces at the same time, so that Voldemort's was suddenly a flaming blur.

I heard the high voice shriek as he yelled his best hope to the heavens,

And I realized that Harry was raising his wand as well, but he was a moment to late-

"Avada Kedavra!"

I watched in horror as the killing curse surged toward Harry, and after so many years keeping him safe my automatic response was to protect him again, one final time.

I threw myself in front of him, and my last thought before the blinding light hit me, was-

'Please, let the boy live'.

Everything faded into black.

And then, suddenly I was blinded, dozens of rays of light in the most brilliant colours filled my vision, and then from afar, as if the wind was carrying it from a great distance, I heard a voice calling my name.

Her voice.

"Severus."

I turned my head from side to side, desperately trying to find her, but to no avail-

"Lily?"- I choked out, hardly believing it was her, after all this time…

"Severus, -" she said again, and then suddenly I could see her,

Hovering above me,

Her face was blurry, but id recognize those green eyes anywhere.

"-You need to live."

"What?"-I said, confused all of a sudden,

"You need to live, Sev."

'Sev'

'Merlin, it really is her'

"I jumped in front of a killing curse to save Harry, your son, I can't live, I'm finally dead Lily, with you." – I tried to bring my hand up to touch her face but my arm was heavy, as if weighed down by an immense weight.

"No Sev, the curse didn't kill you, but that's not what I meant,

all these years you haven't really been living. You eat, sleep, teach, but you never do anything for yourself, you're always on some mission, spying on Voldemort, or doing something for Dumbledore- "

"I have to, to make up for all the terrible things I've done, for killing you!" -I sobbed,

"- I'm s… so sorry Lily, I- "

"Shhh, its ok.

You didn't kill me Severus, Voldemort did, and you've certainly done enough to make up for all your mistakes by now, you were the best friend a girl could ever wish for, I love you Sev, and I forgive you, for everything."

By breath caught, and a tear slowly slid down by cheek.

"I don't deserve your forgiveness, Lily; I deserve to burn in hell for everything I've done."- I said, my self-loathing overwhelming me, as I tried to look away in shame, but she didn't let me, her hands cupped my face as she forced me to look back at her, I could see her clearly now, leaning over me in all her glory.

"No," she said fiercely, with that blazing fire in her eye's that I loved so much- "you've already been through hell, Sev, and now you need to be happy, and move on with your life."

"I can't Lily, not without you, I never wanted to live in a world without you in it, the only reason I did was to keep Harry safe and he doesn't need me anymore, he can kill Voldemort without me."- I pleaded.

"Please Severus, you need to let me go, you're still young, you have your whole life to live, don't waste your second chance"- she said desperately.

I was openly sobbing now, the tears pouring uncontrollably down my face,

She was becoming blurrier again as we spoke, whether because of my tears or otherwise, I could not tell.

"I can't lose you again, please Lily, I love you!"- I begged.

I had never said those words aloud before, at least not to anyone who was not my mother, I had always thought they would make me look weak, but I didn't care about looking weak with Lily, not anymore.

"I love you." I said again, softly this time, almost a whisper.

I knew she didn't return my sentiments, 'best friend', she had said, but still, I loved her.

She was crying as well now, her wonderful emerald eyes briming with tears,

"I know, Severus, and I…I'm so sorry, I…"

"Don't cry Lily, it's going to be ok" again wishing I could reach up and touch her-

She gave me a watery smile- "yes," she said, "I think it will be. You deserve to be happy Sev, don't forget that."

"Lil…" – I trailed off as Lily lowered her lips and let them brush softly against my forehead, she leant back so I could see her face, and the sight of her took my breath away, with her dark auburn hair cascading down past her shoulders, framing her beautiful face.

"Goodbye Sev." She said quietly, and then she was fading away, disappearing as the world turned dark once more-

"No! Lily! Please don't go!" my voice braking in despair,

- "I love you."- I sobbed.

As everything faded into black, I heard her speak, one last time-

"Promise you'll live, Severus, try to be happy.

Please, just live."

"I promise Lily, I'll try."- I said brokenly.

And then I knew no more.

"No, no…!" – the sound of my anguished sobbing filled the air, I felt a light breeze stroke my dry cheeks,

'wait, what?'

'dry' cheeks?!'

Didn't I have tears pouring down my face just moments ago!?

"Please no!"

-then I realized it wasn't my cry's I was hearing, it sounded like a grieving child,

No, not just any child, it was the boy, Harry.

'Harry.'

I suddenly understood, somehow, when Harry sacrificed himself to save the people he cared for, his sacrifice had saved me to.

Harry was crying in earnest now, his sobs accompanied by the more muted wailing and sniffing of other mourners.

it hurt listening to them, I wished they would just be quiet, their cries would not bring back the dead, I would know.

It was disturbing to hear Harry cry, now that I thought about it, I realized that in all the years I had known him, I had never witnessed him shed a single tear.

'Well, no need to let him cry on my behalf' – I thought sourly, as if anyone would ever mourn my death.

I tried to pull myself together and forget my hallucination of Lily, or whatever it had been (was it an hallucination, or maybe a dream? Or had it been real?).

I automatically thought up a cutting remark to shock Harry into silence, it wasn't up to my normal standards, but it would have to do- (I had just nearly died, after all, it was normal for me to be a bit 'not myself' as it were.)

-"Potter, stop that exasperating wailing sound, the last thing this castle needs is a male Moaning Myrtle, and even if it did, I could definitely recommend a more fitting candidate, Mr. Finch-Fletchley, for one, would make an excellent contender."