Chapter 30 – Sokka & Aang's time of the month
Despite his initial doubts, Sokka was truly enjoying his time as a hands-on general manager of The Northern Lights. Having always had a good head for numbers, Sokka found the administrative work to be a total breeze, even if it wasn't the most exciting thing in the world. While listening to some of his beloved tech review podcasts in the background, handling the daily bookkeeping chores felt almost pleasant.
And while the admin work was important, what Sokka loved most about his new job was the more practical side of it. Maintenance to keep everything running smoothly was very important and could sometimes take a lot of time because kitchen equipment had the tendency to break down now and then. Sokka had the necessary engineering aptitude for creative solutions required to repair some of the equipment, which was especially handy since other restaurants would be forced to call in a certified technician and spend hundreds or even thousands of the hard-earned dollars on repairs.
Aside from the necessary maintenance work, Sokka also took on important renovation projects. After Toph's microwaving station in the basement had been permanently shut down, it freed up space that first needed to be renovated. Sokka had converted a part of the large space into another walk-in freezer for ingredients with longer expiry date, while the other side of the room became a neatly organized storage space for canned goods.
Once Sokka was done with the basement overhaul, Azula had sat him down for a chat regarding her idea of expanding the number of tables. With summer knocking at the door, Azula was convinced that they should make better use of the free space just outside the entrance into the restaurant. Sokka had then drawn up plans for a cozy little extension to the restaurant in the shape of a roofed terrace. With the kitchen staff feeling comfortable of being able to handle four more additional tables, Sokka considered the project greenlit and began his work. Two weeks into the project, he was still in the process of buying building materials and also working on securing all the permits for the extension, having to deal with exhausting amounts of bureaucracy.
Still, on this fine Friday, Sokka had scheduled himself some much-needed maintenance work that he had set aside for far too long. Armed with his toolbox, Sokka arrived in the kitchen in the middle of the lunch service, ready to tackle the task of fixing some leaking pipes that Suki had complained about a few weeks ago.
"Hello, hello, hello, Sokka the Handyman is here," Sokka announced himself with exaggerated pompousness as he strode into the kitchen where Toph, Aang and Suki were working like a well-oiled machine, pushing out one dish after another at a pace that felt truly astonishing to Sokka. "Well, it's time to do something about those leaky pipes," he said, rolling up his sleeves.
"Uh, Sokka?" Aang piped up, beckoning him closer. Curious, Sokka approached his best buddy and leaned in closer. "Maybe this isn't the best time for the repairs. Why not do it some other day?"
"Why would I do that?" Sokka frowned. "I have a very meticulously planned schedule for the next two weeks. It says that I should fix those pipes today, so that's what I'm going to do."
"Well… in that case, just be careful," Aang whispered, looking a little upset. "Suki is in a very foul mood. She's already snapped at me three times! I'm just about ready to burst into tears, I swear!"
"Why would Suki snap at you, what did you do?" Sokka asked, feeling surprised.
"It was all about plating!" Aang complained bitterly. "I'm never sloppy with plating and I'm doing everything the same way as I've always done, but she still finds reasons to chew me out. She's being very mean," Aang sighed.
"Right," Sokka said, patting Aang's shoulder. "Hang in there, little buddy. You have nothing to fear now that I'm here. Hey, that rhymed," Sokka chuckled.
"I'm more afraid for you," Aang said worriedly.
"Well, that's very cute, but I need to get to work now," Sokka rolled his eyes before returning to his toolbox and the dodgy piping that Suki had complained about earlier.
"Do you really have to do that now of all times, Sokka?" Suki complained, glaring at him.
"Well, you wanted me to fix this, so I'm fixing it," Sokka shrugged.
"Ugh," Suki grunted. "Alright then, but keep in mind that I'm not in a great mood. At least try to be quiet about it, okay?"
"You won't even know I'm here," Sokka grinned as he grabbed a hammer from the toolbox and began his inspection of the pipes. "Ah, I'm starting to see the problem here," Sokka nodded sagely as he began hammering at the pipes with reckless abandon.
"Stop this right now or I'll gut you like a suckling pig and serve you up with some fava beans and a nice chianti!" Suki bellowed from the top of her lungs at this sudden cacophony of noise as a result of Sokka's work. Sokka immediately pulled away from the pipes and yelped, noticing that Suki was holding up the chef's knife in a very threatening way, looking like she was possessed by a demon. Suki then blinked, shaking her head and lowering the knife. "Oh… sorry, but you see what I mean? You really don't want to get on my nerves today," she said apologetically.
Aang ran up to Sokka, looking worried. "Do you see what I mean now?" he asked. "She's been like that all morning!"
"Uh, what's gotten into you, Suki?" Sokka asked, looking up at his ex-girlfriend.
"Just, you know… not feeling great," Suki replied, looking at Sokka in a way as if he was supposed to understand what she meant. Sokka and Aang exchanged blank stares, both of them shrugging. "Ugh, I'm just dealing with stuff… you know, it's my time of the month," Suki sighed.
"Oh… I see," Sokka snapped his fingers as the memories of Suki having some not great days while they were together suddenly fell into place.
"What time of the month?" Aang wondered. "The weekend?"
"Twinkletoes, you're killing me," Toph wheezed nearby, listening in on the exchange.
"Well, you know, it's high tide," Suki said, giving Aang a forceful stare.
"But we're a couple of miles away from the coast?" Aang scratched his head.
"I'm closed for maintenance," Suki tried again.
"Closed for maintenance?" Aang frowned. "What does that even mean?" Toph actually fell over from laughing too hard, wheezing sounds coming from somewhere behind her work station.
"I've fallen in with the communists," Suki said with a growing feeling of helplessness.
"Well, they do raise some very convincing arguments," Aang nodded severely.
"Carrie, Aang! First scene in Carrie!" Sokka yelled, no longer being able to suffer this embarrassing exchange.
Aang froze, considering this new information as recognition slowly dawned on his face. "Oh… oh!" Aang gasped. "Yes, uh, I see… well, that's… a thing, yeah."
"Yeah," Sokka nodded in uncomfortable agreement as he quickly grabbed his hammer and threw it back in the toolbox, deciding that it would be a good idea to make himself scarce. "You know what… maybe I'll come back to look at those pipes some other time," he said, quickly scrambling for the exit while accompanied by Suki's withering glare.
It was an early Friday afternoon as Azula slowly pulled into the small parking lot adjacent to the apartment building where Ursa and Kiyi lived. She groaned in frustration upon noticing that Zuko had already parked his stupid car next to Ursa's old and rundown Ford Mondeo, robbing Azula of any acceptable parking spots. Grinding her teeth, Azula pulled out of the parking lot and ended up leaving her car at the side of the street, swearing to stab Zuko in the groin if she were to get an illegal parking ticket.
Azula was about to enter the apartment building with Kiyi's present tucked under her arm, when she noticed a familiar looking bicycle belonging to her uncle chained up near the entrance. So, Iroh was here as well, although Azula supposed this shouldn't have come as a surprise to her. After all, this was meant to be more of a family event, and Kiyi would be throwing another party tomorrow, meant exclusively for her group of friends.
As Azula climbed the stairs to the third floor, she was struck with the sudden and irrational fear of Zuko having brought Jet with him. She quickly dismissed this thought, however. If Zuko was still together with Mai, he would have certainly brought her along to a family event like this, but from what Azula had heard from Mai and Ty Lee, Zuko was still in denial about what kind of relationship he was having with Jet. So, there was no way that Jet could be attending, which was probably a good thing because Azula wasn't sure if she could avoid getting violent with the guy who had swindled Katara before going on to steal Mai's admittedly very stupid boyfriend.
"Azula! You made it!" Kiyi cheered excitedly as she opened the doors to let Azula in.
"Of course, I said I would attend, so here I am," Azula replied, a little annoyed that Kiyi would question the word she had given. "Anyway, this is for you," she said, handing Kiyi her birthday present. "You'll find it a far more superior gift than any others you might receive today."
"Alright, Azula," Kiyi chuckled awkwardly, still looking happy as she accepted the gift. "Anyway, mom doesn't want me to open the presents right away, so… I guess we're having the cake first for some reason," she shrugged, leading Azula further into the apartment and towards the living room where Iroh, Ursa and Zuko were sitting around a heavily laden table, crammed with all sorts of delicacies from The Jasmine Dragon bakery, with an exquisite looking chocolate birthday cake with fifteen candles in the middle of the table.
"Glad you made it, Azula," Ursa said, smiling at her. Iroh also greeted her with a welcoming smile, while Zuko limited himself to a grunt as Azula quickly sat down as far from her brother as she physically could. "How have you been? Everything going well at the restaurant? If not for Kiyi updating us, we'd never know what you're up to."
"I'm doing fine, thanks," Azula spoke, a little curtly. "You know, you can visit me yourself, Ursa. You don't have to rely on Kiyi's intel."
"Alright," Ursa replied, looking slightly taken aback. "I wasn't sure if you wanted me showing up at your restaurant."
Azula shrugged, trying to appear indifferent, even if deep inside she found herself desperately craving this opportunity to show off all the changes she had introduced to the restaurant and perhaps even earn herself a rare praise from a parental figure. "It's a free country, I can't exactly stop you from showing up," Azula said. "But if you want a tour of the restaurant, you need to give me a warning in advance. I am, after all, very busy."
"Of course, you are, dear," Ursa smiled softly. "My hours at the bakery are very long, but I have the next Tuesday off, so-"
"But mom, Tuesday is our weekly brunch day at The Blue Spirit," Zuko whined petulantly, though it didn't stop him from flashing a winning stare at Azula.
"And it's going to remain that," Ursa said quickly, not looking best pleased with Zuko's comment. "I'm certain that I can find time for all my children."
"Whatever," Azula shrugged. She glanced at the slightly concerned looking Iroh, who so far had only been listening in without spouting any of his insufferable proverbs. "What about you, uncle? I noticed the bike downstairs. I can't believe you are still bolstering the ranks of the menace of public transportation system, otherwise known as cyclists." If there was a collective of people that Azula hated the most, it was most definitely cyclists. Regardless of whether it was Caldera City, Ba Sing Se or Omashu, cyclists were arrogant assholes with delusions of grandeur who foolishly believed that they owned the streets. They clearly did not realize that the only thing stopping Azula from running them down was Azula not wanting to wash all that blood off from her precious car. It was a common fantasy for Azula to contemplate actually stealing a car so that she could spend an enjoyable evening running down annoying cyclists by the dozens.
"I'm doing very well, niece, thank you for asking," Iroh chuckled. "And cycling is going great. I've already lost twelve pounds, so I'm not stopping anytime soon."
"I still think it's not worth the public humiliation of being one of the Caldera cyclists," Azula frowned. Honestly, just imagining Iroh's bulky frame on that little bicycle of his was both hilarious and disturbing. Azula wasn't sure how the bicycle didn't immediately disintegrate under Iroh's weight.
"Hey, I'm one of the Caldera cyclists, too," Kiyi frowned.
"Yes, but you ride your bike on the sidewalk and not on the street, so the only people you're a menace to are the pedestrians," Azula grinned. "I approve of cyclists like you, Kiyi."
"Well, that's alright then," Kiyi grinned back at her. "But if Katara or Yue asked if anyone wanted to go cycling with them, you would be the first to raise your hand."
"Quiet, you little traitor," Azula hissed, trying to fight off the blush from creeping into her cheeks. "Anyway," Azula rallied, briefly glancing over at Zuko and contemplating whether to acknowledge his presence by engaging in some pleasantries. Zuko visibly perked up when their eyes met, looking ready to respond, so Azula jumped on this opportunity to insult her brother by pointedly ignoring him. "How are you, birthday girl?" she asked, instead turning back to Kiyi and laughing inwardly at the way Zuko seethed from being overlooked.
"Feeling pretty good," Kiyi nodded happily. "Of course, I'll be feeling even better once I'm allowed to open my presents. Or have a slice of my birthday cake," she added, giving her mother a pointed stare.
"Well, now that everyone is here, I suppose we could cut the cake," Ursa allowed. "But first we need to light the candles so that Kiyi can make her birthday wish."
"I'll do it," Azula said, grabbing a matchbox that was sitting on the side of the table and started to light the candles.
"I'll do it way faster," Zuko grinned, retrieving a lighter – which Azula was pretty sure she had seen Jet use when he was still hanging around The Northern Lights – and also began to light the candles.
"Nobody asked for your help," Azula snapped, leaning closer to pettily blow out some of the candles Zuko had already lit.
"Stop that!" Zuko protested, trying to respond the same way, and the two siblings ended up in a struggle over the cake.
"Hey! Those are my candles to blow out, not yours!" Kiyi protested.
"Yes, stop this nonsense!" Ursa raised her voice, something that Azula couldn't remember her doing much, if ever. "Both of you, sit down and take deep breaths before you do something as silly as destroying the cake. Iroh, could you please light the candles?"
"It would be my pleasure," Iroh said, taking the matches from Azula and quickly finishing the job that Azula and Zuko had almost messed up. "There you go, princess," he grinned at Kiyi, inviting her to make a wish by blowing out the candles.
"Yeah, and I have a pretty good idea what to wish for," Kiyi sighed, glaring at both Azula and Zuko as she leaned in, closed her eyes and then proceeded to blow out the candles.
"Well done," Ursa smiled. "Do you want to cut the cake yourself?" she asked, offering Kiyi a knife. Kiyi nodded eagerly, and a few minutes later, everyone had a slightly mangled and rather unevenly cut slice of cake in front of them. Azula decided to save her criticisms of Kiyi's performance for another day, however, as she eagerly sampled a spoonful of her cake, finding herself greatly impressed.
"This is delicious," Azula was forced to admit. "You've really outdone yourself, Ursa."
"Thank you, but I didn't make it all by myself," Ursa smiled. "Iroh helped me put it all together. You probably recognize his patented chocolate cream recipe. Honestly, I was a little worried by just how much alcohol it contains. I think your uncle poured like half a bottle of Baileys and another half bottle of Amaretto into the cream, but you can't argue with the results."
"Oh, there's alcohol in this cake?" Kiyi asked, her eyes shining. "I'll have many more slices then!"
"You realize that most if not all of the alcohol has already evaporated in the process of cooking, right?" Zuko laughed.
"Don't ruin it for Kiyi, Zuko," Azula frowned. "Anyway, the cream isn't really heated to a temperature where most of the alcohol would evaporate, you should know that. So, there's definitely some booze in the cream, Kiyi. If you're going to have more slices of the cake, you're going to sleep like a baby tonight."
"Hmm, that's actually a good argument for letting her have lots of cake," Ursa said thoughtfully.
"I'm definitely having more of this cake, but not before finally opening the presents," Kiyi said, giving her mother a pleading look. "Please don't tell me that I have to wait for something else."
"No, I suppose you can go and open the presents now," Ursa smiled.
Kiyi dashed over to where she had gathered the presents in a medium-sized pile. Azula was flattered to see Kiyi reaching for her present first. Her little sister was clearly smart enough to recognize that Azula would get her a present that would eclipse all of her other gifts. Kiyi quickly ripped off the wrapping paper, gasping when she realized what Azula had gotten for her.
"Oh wow, you got me the Steam Deck!" Kiyi cheered, hugging the box that contained the best handheld gaming device ever to be created.
"Not just any old regular Steam Deck, too," Azula said proudly. "I got you the brand new one with the spiffy OLED screen."
"Oh, please… showoff," Zuko muttered irately, giving Azula a sour stare.
"You're the best sister ever," Kiyi cheered, proceeding to give Azula a bone-crushing hug that left Azula slightly winded just because it had caught her unawares. "Now, between your and Zuko's presents, I'll be able to play all the most important games on my handhelds."
"Wait, you already know what Zuko got you?" Azula blinked.
"Oh, of course, Zuko can't keep a secret if his life depended on it, I thought you knew that." Kiyi and Azula both burst into laughter at that, making Zuko sigh and grumble. "I'm pretty sure that this is a Nintendo Switch, isn't it, Zuko?" Kiyi asked, picking up Zuko's gift. Zuko nodded reluctantly.
"Of course, it is," Azula smirked. "The inferior gift by the inferior sibling."
"Come on, Azula," Kiyi said pleadingly as she opened Zuko's present and retrieved the box containing the Switch. "It's still a really neat little gadget."
"You really don't need to appease Zuko's fragile ego, Kiyi," Azula lectured. "He knows he's been completely outclassed."
Zuko approached them, squaring up against Azula. "It's just like you, desperately trying to outdo me and not realizing how it makes you look like a fake and pretentious little bitch," Zuko snarled at her.
"Oh, whatever. Just take yet another L and move on, Zuzu. You're pathetic," Azula rolled her eyes, leaning towards Zuko as if she was going to shove him. Zuko stood his ground and instead shoved her. Azula stumbled backwards and barely managed to maintain her balance. Ursa and Kiyi both cried out in alarm, but Azula was already seeing red. She struck the scarred side of Zuko's face, making sure to really dig her nails in as deep as she could.
Zuko cried out in pain as he touched his badly bleeding cheek. "That really hurt, you bitch!" he yelled, throwing a punch with no restraint. Zuko's fist struck the left side of Azula's face like a hammer. For a moment, Azula blacked out completely. When she regained her bearings, Azula realized that she was sagging against a wall with Ursa hovering over her and Iroh pulling an enraged looking Zuko away from her.
"I hate you! I hate you both, and I hate your stupid gifts!" Kiyi cried out before running off and slamming the doors to her room.
"Zuko, I'm so disappointed in you right now," Iroh chided his nephew. Azula couldn't decide how to feel about that comment, because on one hand, she enjoyed hearing Iroh berate his favorite nibling, but on the other hand, the comment implied that Iroh wasn't disappointed in her because he simply didn't expect any better from the likes of her.
"This isn't about Zuko, this is about the both of them, but also, it's about Ozai!" Ursa shouted. "Look at how he has conditioned them to fight like animals in a cage match! It's disgusting! I'm not as angry at them as I am at Ozai right now!"
Azula winced, trying to think of some way to defend herself and her father, but nothing reasonable sprang to her mind. "I told you that it was a mistake to invite both me and Zuko at the same time," she offered lamely.
"It wasn't a mistake until you both decided to make it so," Ursa sighed. "Now you've upset Kiyi and ruined her birthday party. I hope you're both proud of yourselves."
"I'll apologize to Kiyi," Zuko said.
"I will do so as well," Azula nodded. "You go first, Zuko."
"You should both apologize together," Iroh said, helping Zuko clean his bloody cheek. "I don't know how you two possibly missed it, but what that little girl wants above everything is to see her big brother and big sister getting along."
Azula and Zuko exchanged guilty stares. "I understand, uncle, but it's just… not easy for us," Zuko sighed heavily.
"Of course, Ursa and I are aware of the wretched competition that Ozai has forced upon you," Iroh scowled. "We understand the challenges."
"But Kiyi isn't a part of your competition," Ursa said. "She doesn't deserve to get caught in the crossfire."
"And the same goes for me and Ursa," Iroh added. "We were hoping that you could at least suspend your animosity while spending time with your family." Iroh then appeared like he had been suddenly struck by a great idea. "Maybe that's actually a solution that we can all agree on," he said. "How about we declare this apartment a neutral ground? A place where you set your differences aside?"
Azula and Zuko exchanged long stares. "Alright," Zuko eventually nodded. The cloth he held against his cheek was by now quite thoroughly soaked in blood. "I agree to a ceasefire whenever we're hanging out with the family."
"I also agree," Azula said quickly. She tried not to show it, but her cheek where Zuko's punch had landed hurt very badly, and talking made the pain feel so much worse.
"I guess we should tell Kiyi, together with our apologies," Zuko said. Azula merely nodded, following him to Kiyi's room. It took Zuko explaining that he and Azula had agreed not to fight for Kiyi to eventually open the doors to her room and allow her siblings to enter.
"You guys are such idiots," Kiyi said, shaking her head sternly. "You're fighting about the importance of your gifts as if they're what really matters. All I really wanted for my birthday was to see you two dolts getting along. What do you think I wished for when I blew out the candles?"
"Oh," Zuko gulped as he and Azula exchanged more guilty stares.
"Damn," Azula muttered. "Being made to feel like an immature idiot by my wiser than her years kid sister. This is so embarrassing."
"Well, you deserve to feel embarrassed," Kiyi snorted. "Anyway, your arguments were terrible. Obviously, the Deck is the superior device from tech standpoint. All the cool nerds at my school have it. It's a great gift, Azula. But the Switch is still relevant, and you know it. I've always wanted to play the Zelda games, and now I can do that, so your gift is just as great, Zuko."
"I suppose I can see that," Azula admitted. "The Zelda games are classics for a reason."
"That's exactly what I was thinking," Zuko nodded. "Also, Jet said that the Zelda games would be great for a girl of Kiyi's age because there's very little challenge involved."
"Well, I don't know who this Jet is, but he sounds like a moron," Kiyi frowned, her words making Azula laugh. She instantly regretted laughing, however, because her cheek exploded in a torrent of excruciating pain. "Anyway, Zuko, that cloth is so soaked, it's starting to drip blood all over my carpet. And Azula, your cheek is all purple. You guys should probably go to the emergency room."
"That's probably a good idea," Zuko sighed heavily. "Azula knows the weak points to go for. She knows that the scarred side of my face heals much slower."
"I admit to nothing," Azula shrugged. "But I suppose there's no escaping the ER visit. But I'm telling you, Zuko, if my cheek is broken and they make me wear something that looks like one of those early ice hockey goalie masks, I'm going to be really pissed off."
"Alright, enough arguing!" Kiyi glared at Azula. "Actually… if you want me to forgive you for almost ruining my birthday, here are my conditions. You will go to the ER together and you will be polite to each other. Azula, Zuko has to hold that cloth against his face so he obviously can't drive. You'll take him in your car."
Azula wanted to protest that she didn't want to have Zuko's blood all over the interior of her car, but one look at Kiyi's stern expression told Azula that arguing would only end in a losing battle. Kiyi was truly her sister from how she could be quite intimidating when she put in the effort. "Alright, Kiyi, I'll take Zuko in my car," Azula sighed.
"Smart decision," Kiyi beamed. "While you're getting ready, I'll tell mom to get some of the cake and other goodies to take with you. I suppose my dumb siblings still deserve a treat for their amazing gifts…"
Sokka stepped back from the fixed piping in the kitchen of The Northern Lights, regarding his work with a sense of pride and accomplishment. It had been a truly smart and safe decision to rearrange his meticulously planned schedule and handle this task between the services when the kitchen was empty and Suki wasn't around to try and bite off his head. With everything sorted, Sokka picked up his toolbox and turned to leave the kitchen, running into Aang who was entering at the same time. Aang looked very upset and sniffling as he nearly crashed into Sokka.
"Whoa, what's going on with you, little buddy?" Sokka asked, concerned.
"I don't want to talk about it!" Aang snapped, quickly running behind his work station.
"Hey, what's gotten into you?" Sokka asked, feeling very puzzled. "You're not usually this emotional. Talk to me, Aang."
"Well, I was just talking with Yue out in the dining room, and I offered her to help set the tables for the dinner service, but in response she just snapped at me!" Aang sobbed. "She was being so mean!"
"That… doesn't sound like Yue at all," Sokka scratched his chin. "Not that I'm questioning your side of the story," Sokka added quickly, having noticed that Aang was giving him a reproachful stare.
"I don't know what's gotten into both Suki and Yue," Aang sighed. "Usually, they're so nice to me and everyone else."
"Well, we know what's up with Suki, but usually she's not this mean when she's having her period, I know as much from our dating experience," Sokka nervously rubbed the back of his neck. "Something might be up, indeed."
"Do you think they could be possessed?" Aang wondered.
"What? No, of course not," Sokka waved dismissively. "Let's not get carried away with goofy explanations." Sokka thought for a while. "You know what we should do? We should talk with Kat. If anyone knows what's going on with Suki and Yue, it'll be her."
"Great idea, Sokka," Aang nodded in agreement. "I saw Katara walk into the office earlier. I think she wanted to work on the design of the new menus."
"Excellent," Sokka rubbed his hands as together with Aang they went over to the manager's office. "Also, let's be polite and knock on the off chance that Katara is also in a terrible mood," Sokka said, stopping at the doors. "We wouldn't want to do anything annoying and risk setting her off, right?" he added, proceeding to give an exaggerated string on knocks mimicking a particularly annoying song that was currently on repeat at every radio station.
"What?" Katara yelled as she opened the doors and Sokka froze in mid-knock. "What's wrong with you, messing with the doors like a complete idiot and not letting me work? I hope you interrupted me for a good reason, or Tui and La be my witnesses, I'm so going to kick your asses!"
Sokka and Aang exchanged terrified stares. "I just… wanted to ask you something important?" Sokka managed humbly.
Katara blinked, shaking her head and looking like she had snapped out of a brief daze. "Uh, sorry, I think I might have overreacted a little there," she said apologetically, stepping aside and welcoming Sokka and Aang into the office. "I've just been in a very irritable mood today," Katara added.
Sokka and Aang exchanged stares once again, this time knowing instead of terrified. "Why are you in such a bad mood, Kat?" Sokka asked carefully.
Katara hesitated slightly before answering. "Well, if you really must know, it's because I'm having my period, and this time it's seriously kicking my ass even with ibuprofen," she grumbled.
"I see," Sokka remarked. "So, we came here because earlier Suki snapped at both me and Aang, and she also said that she's having bad period pains. And then when Yue was mean to Aang earlier, could that also be because she…"
"Oh," Katara smiled in realization. "Yeah… I guess over the years our periods ended up synchronizing. I hear that often happens with female friends and coworkers, so it's nothing to be surprised about." Katara gave Sokka and Aang sympathetic stares. "I'm sorry that you two are getting snapped at, though, you don't deserve that at all. It must be tough to deal with us when we're being so grumpy and snappy, but I want you both to know that I really appreciate your patience with us. You're the best brother and best friend a girl could ever hope to have," Katara smiled at them both.
Sokka suddenly felt overwhelmed by a powerful feeling of love and appreciation for his amazing sister. Katara really was one of a kind, and Sokka had never made his sister aware of how much she meant to him. She cared so much about everyone even when she was dealing with this annoyance, causing her severe pain. Maybe it was time for Sokka to finally tell his sister how much he truly appreciated her. "I love you, Kat," Sokka exclaimed, pulling his very surprised looking sister into a hug as he felt tears pouring down his cheeks. Aang was also crying his heart out as he watched the two siblings embrace.
"Uh… not that I don't appreciate the sentiment, but… are you sure you're feeling well, Sokka?" Katara asked, giving Sokka a curious stare. "It's really not like you to become so emotional," Katara remarked, then looking at the equally tearful Aang. "And that goes for both of you."
"I don't know what's going on," Aang shrugged while continuing to weep. "I've been feeling very strange lately."
"Me too," Sokka sobbed, still clinging on to his sister. "I just suddenly realized how I've never told you just how much I appreciate you, and it made me feel so sad," Sokka admitted, finally releasing Katara as she gave him another peculiar stare.
"Maybe it's something in your diet," Katara frowned, looking thoughtful. "Ever since we placed those snack vending machines in the lobby, you two have been all over them every day. This is probably just something caused by your abnormal sugar intake."
"That's ridiculous," Sokka protested. "My diet has been the same healthy one for the past fifteen years," he said, aware that his diet of mostly meat as well as plenty of sugary drinks and snacks at the expense of any fruit and vegetables would not be called healthy by any dietary specialist.
"Please, I know what you live on, Sokka," Katara rolled her eyes. "As for Aang… well, just tell me what you had for breakfast?"
"Smarties cereal," Aang explained.
"Spirits, I didn't even know Smarties made a cereal," Katara groaned.
"They don't, it's just a couple of Smarties rolls in a bowl of milk," Aang grinned.
Katara and Sokka exchanged shocked stares. "I rest my case," Katara announced. "It's too much sugar, that's all there is to it."
"No, that doesn't make any sense, Kat," Sokka protested. "I've lived essentially on meat and sugar for years and we've never had this kind of problem."
"Well," Katara paused, giving both Sokka and Aang searching stares. "The only other explanation that I can think of is-… no, that's too silly, that couldn't be it," Katara stopped, shaking her head.
"What?" Sokka and Aang both demanded, speaking at once.
"Well," Katara blushed, looking a little embarrassed. "I feel ridiculous for even saying this, but… remember what I said about me, Suki and Yue ending up synchronizing our periods?"
"Yes, but what does that have to do with us?" Aang shrugged.
"Well, I was just thinking that maybe this synchronizing has also somehow affected you both," Katara suggested.
"What?" Sokka burst into laughter. "That's impossible! Aang's a man! I'm a man! We're men!"
"I understand that, Sokka, but you can't really argue with the symptoms, can you?" Katara insisted. "Tell me in more detail how you both have been feeling lately. I've already noticed some weight gain with you, Sokka."
"Great, thanks," Sokka groaned. "I suppose that I have been a little easier to annoy than usually. I just wrote it down to having a mother of all headaches for the past two days."
"I've also been much easier to irritate lately," Aang confessed. "It just feels like my anxieties are acting up all at once. It's making me feel very… delicate, and also, I think I'm ugly," Aang sobbed dramatically.
"Well, there you have it, you have all the classic symptoms of PMS," Katara grinned sadistically. "I'm glad you're getting to experience the joys of being a girl. Strap in, lads, because it's going to be a fun ride for you two."
"No, this is a ridiculous theory and I refuse to accept it," Sokka vehemently shook his head, turning to leave and dragging Aang out of the office with him. "Come on, Aang, we have to prove that Katara is totally wrong about this."
"But wait, Sokka!" Aang protested. "We didn't even tell Katara about our breast tenderness!"
"Shut up, Aang! Spirits, you're so embarrassing!" Sokka roared over Katara's laughter as they made a very undignified escape from the confrontation.
Several hours after the disastrous argument with Katara, Sokka returned to the manager's office to find Aang researching facts about men and PMS on the internet, just as Sokka had asked him to do. "Did you find anything?" Sokka asked, starting to pace back and forth along the office.
"Nothing conclusive so far," Aang shook his head.
"Damn it," Sokka groaned, sitting down at the manager's desk. "You don't believe that theory, do you?" he asked.
"Of course not. Katara is so silly," Aang snorted. "Sugar," he added with derisive laughter.
"Yeah," Sokka laughed as well, then stopping abruptly. "Wait, what?" he blinked. "You seriously believe that we're having a period?"
"Of course, don't you?" Aang asked.
"No! I'm a man, you're a man, we're men! We're not having a period!" Sokka ranted.
"Well, I don't know how else to explain the symptoms, though," Aang shrugged. "But you're also right in that we shouldn't be jumping to conclusions. That's why I decided to ask for a second opinion."
"Uh… what do you mean by that, Aang?" Sokka asked with a sinking feeling at the pit of his stomach.
"Well, I just posted all of our personal information along with our symptoms to the furry discord and I asked my friends there whether they think we have PMS or not," Aang helpfully explained.
"You… you did what?" Sokka exclaimed. "Spirits, what have you done? We'll become the laughing stock of the internet!"
"Oh, come on, my furry friends would hardly use this sensitive information to make fun of us," Aang replied cheerfully, but then the expression on his face changed and he appeared horrified. "Oh no, they totally would! What have I done?" he exclaimed frantically, typing on the keyboard and then groaning. "There already are over a dozen memes of us and they're spreading like wildfire…"
Sokka leaned in to take a look at the memes and groaned when he saw one of them, which had his and Aang's faces photoshopped onto two elderly ladies under a caption that said 'Lady Problems?' "Tell me why I shouldn't strangle you here and now, Aang," Sokka threatened.
"Because I'm your best buddy?" Aang spoke pleadingly, looking at Sokka with big soulful eyes.
"Ugh," Sokka grunted, quickly giving up on the idea of physically assaulting Aang. "Anyway, I guess there's nothing we can do to stop the spread of the memes." Aang gave him another apologetic stare. "However, we can fight the symptoms of the PMS."
"I thought you said that this couldn't be PMS," Aang said.
"Yes, I know what I said, but whatever it is, we need to fight it, so… I went to Katara and asked if there was something that she and the other girls did if the symptoms threatened to get on top of them," Sokka explained. "So… what would you say to a big girl's party, Aang?"
"I don't know, how big are the girls?" Aang asked, looking confused.
Sokka groaned. "No, you dunce, I just meant a big party with our girls where we do insufferable girly things," Sokka explained. "It sounds horrific, I know, but apparently it does wonders in staving off the PMS symptoms."
"Sure, I'm in," Aang agreed readily.
"Alright, great," Sokka nodded. "Anyway, it's my turn with the bottle," he said, holding out his hand. Aang sighed and pulled out the hot water bottle from under his shirt, passing it over to Sokka, who immediately slipped it under his shirt. Maybe he didn't have PMS, but the hot water bottle was still helping with his breast tenderness.
"Well, that was humiliating, having to explain just how we came by our injuries," Zuko sighed, leaving the local hospital's emergency room with Azula in tow. The scarred side of Zuko's face was heavily bandaged, while Azula looked like one of those old timey ice hockey goalies because of the silly mask she was wearing.
"Yes, the hospital staff are probably convinced that you're a terrible brother for punching your poor and helpless sister in the face," Azula smirked.
"Pfft, they loved me," Zuko argued. "I signed twice the number of autographs than you did."
"Big deal, impressing some bored nurses," Azula rolled her eyes. "Anyone can appeal to the lowest common denominator."
"Whatever, Azula," Zuko grumbled. "Anyway, since I left my car back at mom's place, can you at least take me back there without being a complete bitch about it?"
"I could do that, but there was something else that I wanted to address first," Azula smirked. "As you may have noticed, we have fulfilled our promise to Kiyi by visiting the ER together without too many arguments. Also, we are no longer on neutral ground, and we're still relatively close to the ER, which will become relevant in a moment."
"Huh?" Zuko blinked. "Why is that relevant?"
"I'll show you why," Azula said, lifting her right leg and then driving her stiletto heel right through Zuko's foot. Zuko cried out in agony as he crumpled to the floor, grabbed his mangled foot and started to roll around, whimpering.
"What did you do that for, you crazy bitch?" Zuko cried.
"This is what you deserve for dumping my best friend in favor of that complete and utter asshole Jet Patel," Azula said sternly. "Not to mention for making me wear this ridiculous looking mask," she added, turning around and walking down the hospital corridor, leaving her whimpering sibling to crawl back to the nearby emergency room.
"I can't believe I'd never seen Steel Magnolias before," Aang wept as the credits of the movie began to roll. It was late Friday evening, and together with Sokka, Toph, Katara, Yue and Suki they were hanging out upstairs above the restaurant, having a big girlie party to soothe their PMS symptoms. Everyone except for Toph was wearing a white bathrobe, and those with hair also had a towel wrapped around their heads after enjoying a hot shower to reduce the period cramps. Aang didn't really have the cramps, and neither did Sokka, but they had still gone along with it, hoping that it would stave off the symptoms they did have.
"Good, isn't it?" Yue smiled through the tears. "What should we watch next?" she asked.
"Well, let's see what we have here," Suki said, rising from the sofa and walking over to a shelf with the DVD collection that had been put together mostly by Sokka, but the others had also contributed to it over the years. Following the breakup, Suki hadn't felt petty enough to collect her DVD's and she had just left them there for everyone's enjoyment.
"Did you really think that was good?" Sokka hissed, leaning in closer to Aang as the three girls stepped aside to discuss what to watch next.
"Of course," Aang nodded excitedly, frowning when he noticed Sokka rolling his eyes. "Didn't you?" Aang asked.
"No!" Sokka groaned. "It was… heartwarming," he explained, making a face. "I hate things that are heartwarming!"
"Well, I loved it," Aang shrugged. "It made me feel like a princess, and I refuse to believe that it didn't do the same for you."
"Well, I'll admit that it made my breast tenderness disappear completely," Sokka said.
Toph burst out laughing, sitting in a chair well away from the others, claiming that she wanted to maintain a distance in order not to catch the stupid from them. "You are two of the most ridiculous people in the history of ever," Toph wheezed, having listened to their banter.
"Yeah, whatever," Aang shrugged. "Anyway, Toph, you're a girl. How come you haven't synchronized… you know, your time of month with the other girls?"
"Because that's not actually a thing, you dunderheads. It doesn't happen," Toph sighed. "And also, even if it could happen, it wouldn't happen to me because I'm completely immune to suggestion. I just have that sort of brain, impenetrable as a rock."
"And just as smooth," Sokka quipped, making Aang burst into laughter.
"Oh, now you're going to get it," Toph growled, falling on Sokka and giving him a solid walloping, by accident also managing to catch Aang a few times. Fortunately for Aang and Sokka, the other girls quickly raced to their rescue and calmed things down.
"We couldn't agree on a single movie, so we each chose one," Yue announced. "I went with Bridget Jones's Diary. Although, I could only maybe watch the first half of it, I need to get back to Kya soon."
"Well, I picked When Harry Met Sally," Katara said. "Meg Ryan is just so wholesome."
"I think Dirty Dancing is the best choice, though," Suki argued. "Watching them dance really makes those cramps feel less painful, you know?"
"I guess then we should go with Dirty Dancing," Aang said. "Although, I'm tempted to say that we should watch all three of them." Sokka groaned, using a moment when nobody was paying him any attention in order to thwack Aang on the side of the head for his suggestion.
"I'm going to need much more wine if we're watching Dirty Dancing," Toph groaned. "That movie is so insufferable to even listen to."
"Alright, Dirty Dancing it is," Suki announced victoriously, inserting the disc into the DVD player. She had just grabbed the remote control of the player, about to press the play button, when she was interrupted by voices of people coming up the stairs. Soon enough, the newcomers revealed themselves, Azula and Ty Lee arriving upstairs and gawking at a bunch of ridiculous looking people wearing nothing but bathrobes and towels around their heads.
"Right, I may regret asking, but can someone tell me what is going on here?" Azula demanded. For some reason, she was wearing one of those silly looking ice hockey goalie masks from the 1960's.
"Oh, Sokka and I are having our first period, and the girls are helping us deal with it," Aang explained, helpful as always.
Azula just stood there frozen for what felt like a very long time, during which her broken brain visibly attempted to reboot, only to experience failure again and again. "Well, I've decided that I can't deal with this now," Azula ended up announcing. "Whatever insanity is plaguing you, make sure to get rid of it by tomorrow morning when I show up for my shift," she added before turning around to leave.
Ty Lee was left behind at the top of the stairs, nervously wringing her hands. "So, uh… I know I can get pretty cunty when I'm on my period, and I just don't know if I can deal with an annoyed boyfriend tonight, so… rain check, maybe?" she spoke awkwardly, then turning around and dashing down the stairs. "Azula? Bestie? Let's hang out! How about a sleepover?"
"Wait up, Ty Lee!" Sokka reacted, jumping up from the sofa and chasing after his girlfriend. "I'm not actually having a period! I'm a man! This has all been a stupid misunderstanding!"
"Did Sokka just run out on a busy street wearing nothing but a bathrobe and a towel around his head?" Suki asked a while later.
"Yes, and he's probably being arrested for indecent exposure right about now," Katara sighed.
"Well, at least you still believe the PMS theory, don't you, Aang?" Yue giggled.
"Of course," Aang nodded earnestly. "And I think Sokka does as well, but he's simply more in denial. It's probably because he's less in touch with his feminine side than I am."
"Whatever," Toph snorted. "I'm just going to tell you one thing, Twinkletoes. If you think you're going to put us through this imagined period charade every month, I'm going to get my chef's knife and stab that feminine side of yours, and that's my very violent promise to all of you…"