A Grimy and Grubby Cantina

Mos Eisley Space Port

Tatooine

Han Solo allowed his face to stretch into a cocky grin and said to his copilot and best friend, Chewbacca, "Seventeen thousand! Those guys must really be desperate. This could really save my neck. Get back to the ship and get her ready."

Chewbacca roared an affirmative and strode out of the cantina, with the crowd parting in his wake. He was tall, and bulky, and everyone knew that Wookiees had short tempers so no was going to bother him.

Han released a pent up sigh and stood up slowly. He owed a lot of money to the local crime lord, Jabba the Hutt, and he really needed to pay him as soon as possible. He could only hope this weird old man and the spindly boy would actually come through with the credits.

He wandered in the direction of the door and then stopped abruptly as a green skinned alien pointed a blaster at his chest and said, in Rodian, "Going somewhere, Solo?"

"Well, bantha poodoo," Solo thought, reversing course, dropping back into his seat, and lifting one booted leg onto the table in what he hoped was a casual manner. "Yes, Greedo. As a matter of fact, I was just going to see your boss. Tell Jabba that I've got his money."

The Rodian smirked as much as he could given the arrangement of his facial features and said, "It's too late. You should have paid him when you had the chance. Jabba's put a price on your head so large that every bounty hunter in the galaxy will be looking for you. I'm lucky I found you first."

Han tilted his head to look upwards while at the same time lowering his hand to his blaster and carefully pulling it out, all out of sight of Greedo, who was stupidly sitting across the table in a direct line of sight to Solo's blaster.

"But this time, I've got the money," he stated.

"If you give it to me, I might forget I found you," the alien said smugly.

Han rolled his eyes. "I don't have it with me. Tell Jabba..."

"Jabba's through with you," Greedo snarled. "He has no time for smugglers who drop their shipments at the first sign of an Imperial cruiser.

" "Even I get boarded sometimes," Han replied, looking indignant. "Do you think I had a choice?"

Greedo glowered at the smuggler. "You can tell that to Jabba. He may only take your ship."

"Over my dead body."

"That's the idea," Greedo replied, enjoying the syllables of his native language rolling off his green tongue. "I've been looking forward to killing you for a long time."

"Yes, I'll bet you have," Han replied, beginning to depress the trigger of his blaster. And then he stopped. What if, he wondered, he met a princess and she fell in love with him? Would she be happy with him shooting first? Was that not quite honorable? He was just a scrumrat who had fought his way off of Corellia but if a princess...

Greedo fired. Han Solo was a quick thinker. And a quick draw. But he knew physics enough to know that since Greedo shot first, he was dead. He was…

The blaster bolt deflected a good six inches from Han's torso, and bounced back directly to smack Greedo in the chest. Who fell over, firmly deceased.

Han stared, flummoxed, and then turned hastily, and his blaster too, as a female voice exclaimed, "What was that?"

Han Solo blinked and tightened his grip on his blaster, though he did not fire. Three humans stood a meter away – a dark blond man, a lovely brunette, and an equally loved redhead, all about his age, dressed in black, blue, and green respectively. The man was going to die of heat stroke in that outfit.

"What what?" Solo asked. He prided himself on his ability to adjust to sudden changes, but he was shaking, just a little, at his close brush with death and he was totally discombobulated about what had just happened. Since when did blaster bolts reverse course?

"Why didn't you shoot him first?" the brunette demanded, waving an indignant finger at the dead Rodian. "You knew he wanted to kill you."

Han opened his mouth and then closed it because what could he say? That he had been dreaming about marrying a princess? Like from some lame fairy tale?

"We should introduce ourselves," the male said cheerily. "I'm Luke, this is my sister Leia, and my wife Mara."

"I don't care," Han said grumpily.

To his surprise, this produced a fond look on the woman called Leia, who said, "Now there's the Han Solo I know and love."

Han had never laid eyes on this woman in his life, and the hair on the back of his neck prickled uneasily.

"Sorry, that is confusing," 'Luke' said, and then 'Leia' cried out, "Luke, Alderaan!"

The three oddballs froze and Han watched suspiciously as they exchanged glances. Who were these people?

"Leia, Mara," Luke said, his tone now steely, "go to the Falcon and get ready; I will go pick up Kenobi and the kid and we'll meet you as soon as possible. If we hurry, maybe..."

"Wait a minute," Han blustered, rolling to his feet, his blaster still pointed towards the trio. "No one is going on board my ship without my say so, and unless you have money, you aren't invited!"

"We can pay you," Leia said.

"How much?"

Again, the weird exchanges of glances and then Luke said, with what was definitely a subdued grin, "A lot. Our father is rolling in credits."

Mara chuckled at this and said, "Now that is an interesting visual."

"Anyway," Leia said, and marched forward to pluck the blaster from Han's hand, whereupon she put it in its holster, and then grabbed his arm. "Let's go, shall we? Where are we going?"

"Docking Bay 94," Luke said, which freaked Han out slightly more.

"Sorry, I know I'm being weird," the man said, gazing rather hypnotically into Solo's eyes, "but you know you've got major Jabba trouble. Do you want to hang out here waiting for another bounty hunter?"

"No, no I don't." Han said, "but you still aren't going on board my ship without some kind of proof you can pay."

"Let's talk about that later, shall we?" Leia asked sweetly and pulled Han toward the side entrance to the cantina.

Han went.

/

Docking Bay 94

Jabba the Hutt was huge. Partly that was because he was a Hutt, and Hutts were huge. Partly that was because he loved to eat and as the local resident crime lord, he always got to eat whatever he wanted. It was fun, but if he got much bigger, he might have trouble moving around with ease.

Not that he really needed to move; he had plenty of minions who worked for him who could do his dirty work for him. But sometimes it was nice to get out there and get your big fat hands messy.

"Come on out, Solo!" he roared in Huttese toward the Millennium Falcon, which was resting peacefully.

"I'm right here, Jabba," came a voice from behind him and his lackeys.

Everyone turned around hastily and Boba Fett, a bounty hunter currently working for the Tatooine crime lord, laid a significant hand on his blaster.

Jabba narrowed his eyes for two seconds, and then widened them. Solo and his Wookiee companion were expected, but the beautiful females flanking the Corellian were not.

"Solo," he said, his wide mouth stretching into a grin, "your taste in company has improved."

Solo glowered and said, "They are passengers, Jabba, nothing more. I've got a nice easy charter coming up and I can pay back what I owe you, along with a little extra. I just need a little more time."

Jabba wriggled his way closer, his large, beady eyes drifting from the gorgeous redhead to the lovely brunette, and then back again.

"I might be willing to forgive you your debt if you leave these two behind," Jabba said, leering dramatically. He did adore humanoid slave girls.

"Not going to happen, Jabba," the redhead said, suddenly producing a blaster in one hand, which she pointed at Jabba's giant, blobby torso.

Jabba the Hutt laughed loudly, while his various minions shifted position to point their own blasters at the quartet.

"Hey," Solo exclaimed, lifting his hands. "Let's not get stupid here."

"Sorry, Solo," the redhead said, suddenly turning her blaster and firing a stun ray at the man. He was less than a meter away, and collapsed to the ground.

The Wookiee howled and lifted his bowcaster, but the brunette woman was too quick for him. A moment later, he too was unconscious thanks to a couple of blaster rays shot in quick succession.

"Shall we talk, Jabba?" the brunette asked, and Jabba laughed again. He did like pretty females with spunk.

"There is no bounty on Solo's head yet, I am afraid," he said, eying her with appreciation. She took a bold step forward and looked up into his face, which wasn't easy because she was tiny.

"And there never will be," she said cheerfully. There was a peculiar sound and suddenly Jabba's insides were on fire.

He yelped in outrage and anguish as the blue laser blade made its way up his torso, splitting him open like an Alderaanian grape.

He was too busy to pay much attention to the ensuing battle, which was interesting and bad for his own guys, as the redhead lit her own lightsaber, hers an interesting shade of purple, and his men were falling and dying and even Boba Hutt, BOBA HUTT, was chopped in half, and Jabba fell over …

Dead.

When the battle was over, one minion was still alive, a Weequay by the name of Tootles, and he stared in terror as the redhead approached with her scary glowy blade still buzzing madly. His left leg was bleeding thanks to a deflected blaster shot, and he couldn't walk.

"I'm not going to kill you," the woman said, her teeth baring in a feral grin, "but I am going to warn you not to work for with crime lords in the future. Got it?"

"Got it," he replied meekly.

"What happened here?" a young voice demanded

The women turned around as an old man entered the docking bay, with two younger men at his heels, and two droids trundling after them all. One of the young men was blond, and one was dark blond, and this was just so not how he thought this day was going to go.

"We killed Jabba," the brunette said cheerfully.

"And we stunned Solo and Chewbacca," the redhead said.

The boy, who was very young indeed, gazed wide eyed at the mound of flesh lying in a smelly heap and said, "That's awesome about Jabba, but who is going to fly the ship? I mean, I can…"

"We'll take care of that," the brunette said cheerfully. "Now come on, let's get Solo and Chewbacca on board before the Wookiee comes to and tries to rip our arms off."

Note: I think that Boba Fett is portrayed more positively in the newer shows but I still think killing him off is sensible in this situation.