The Palladium
In hyperspace
En Route to some mysterious place
Five days later
"Idiot's Array!" Relinka Spetzv exclaimed, and could not help but giggle manically. She had lost the four previous games of sabacc with her traveling partner, Cray Shifton, and it was a relief to finally win.
She was also giggling manically because life had been super weird lately and she was stressed out. She and Cray were the most well known holonet hosts in the entire galaxy, the faces of the Imperial Holonet network. When Emperor Palpatine had died suddenly less than a week earlier, she had been, while shocked, in her element. She had dyed her hair black and worn black and walked around looking dramatically sad and thought she was doing a great job with it all…
Until three days earlier, she and Cray were both snatched by unknown agents and hauled onto what looked like a merchant vessel, and locked into a very charming suite of rooms, with two bedrooms, two refreshers, and a pleasant living room. There were even a few spare clothes for them in roughly their own sizes.
They had been here for three days now and were still in hyperspace. No one had come to talk to them, though good food showed up at regular intervals.
It was frightening, without a doubt, but Relinka was, at heart, an optimistic person. Given that she and her cohost had not been mistreated, and that the amenities were pleasant, she was moderately calm. Far more than Cray, who was a pessimist at heart.
There was a sudden quiver in the vessel and both looked over to the window.
"We've left hyperspace," Cray said nervously and obviously.
"Yes," Relinka agreed, and both hurried to stare out of the window at the planet approaching rapidly.
Silence fell for a minute and Relinka found herself opening her eyes wide, then squinting, and then opening her eyes widely again. It didn't help.
"I have no idea which planet that is," she said anxiously.
Cray grimaced and said, "Desert planet, obviously, but there are a bunch of them."
Relinka gulped and blew out a breath. Now that they were actually almost there, wherever there was, she felt a frisson of fear moving up and down her spine.
"Actually," Cray said five minutes later, "I don't think we're landing on the planet. It looks like the ship is headed toward that small moon."
Relinka stared at the shiny sphere getting closer by the second and gasped, then said, "That's no moon. That's a space station."
"It's too big to be a space station!" Cray argued.
"There were rumors of a gigantic, powerful planet killing space station," Relinka said, "though I admit I didn't really believe them. But that isn't a moon."
They were close enough now to see the various towers sprouting out of the structure, and there were numerous TIE fighters flitting here and there, along with several Star Destroyers, looking terrifyingly small compared to the battle station.
The two holonet hosts watched as one of the bays opened in space and swallowed their ship whole. A few minutes later, the ship landed on the hanger bay without so much as a bump and the engines shut down.
Relinka blew out another breath and then popped to her feet and rushed over to the refresher. When she emerged two minutes later, her cohost was waiting in the main living area, looking perturbed.
"Are you feeling sick?" he asked.
"Not so sick that I needed to throw up, but who knows when we'll have access to a refresher again."
Cray obviously thought this was a good point, so he quickly entered the refresher again.
Once he had finished his business, the twosome wandered up and down the room for one minute and thirty seconds before the door opened suddenly to reveal a good looking young man of some thirty years of age, dressed in black, with dark blond hair and brilliant blue eyes. Relinka, who had been feeling frightened, felt something quite different at the sight of the intruder. She was single, after all, and this man…
"I'm married, actually," the man said, "with four kids."
Relinka's eyes bulged. Was it possible this man was reading her mind?
"I am, yes," the man said. "You shield your thoughts abysmally. Like terribly. Probably that is one of the reasons Palpatine liked you, though; there was no way you were going to betray him when your mind was an open book."
"Who are you?" Cary demanded. "Why were we abducted?"
"Both of those are great questions," their abductor/host/mysterious dude replied. "I am Luke. You were, yes, abducted is the right word – you were abducted so you can host Darth Vader's telecast. My sister and I thought the galaxy would feel more assured about his succession to Emperor if you were hosting the affair."
Both hosts promptly turned entirely pale and Relinka quavered, "Lord Vader is here?"
"Yes," the man replied, and grinned. "But don't worry, we won't let him harm you in anyway."
The twosome were distracted by the sudden arrival of a beautiful, petite woman with brunette hair, who marched in and said, "Luke, we should get our guests dressed, don't you think? The sooner Vader starts his thing, the better. I think our time is running out."
The man nodded and said, "I think you are right. Relinka, Cray, meet my sister, Leia."
"Let's get you into some new clothes," Leia suggested.
/
Random large Room
Death Star
In Orbit around Tatooine
An Hour Later
"Sit here," Luke told Relinka. The holonet host bit her lip and sank nervously into the appropriate seat next to Cray and waited. At least her outfit was quite attractive, a dark green creation which matched her currently auburn locks well. And oh, how happy she was to not have black hair anymore! Leia, whoever she was, had proven quite adept at getting her sorted out for this admittedly terrifying interview.
Cray was dressed in tans and grays, which oddly enough looked great.
The door opened and Leia entered the room, dressed in blue, with Darth Vader stalking along behind her, his cape swishing dramatically behind him.
Relinka was a trained professional, but she couldn't help the squeak of terror which escaped her at this moment.
"Don't worry," Luke whispered. "Like I said, we won't let him hurt you. Also, part of him being so impressive is the cape; just imagine him without the cape."
This seemed like a really bad idea to Relinka; apparently Force Sensitives could read her mind and the last thing she needed was Vader getting pissed off because she was imagining him without his cape.
"Our kids love to run around with towels tucked into their collars," Luke continued cheerfully. "They like to dress up like their grandfather, without the mask of course."
Relinka had just been trying to stay calm and keep her head down, but this casual comment caused random synapses to collide with other random synopsis in her head.
"Grandfather?" she blurted out.
"Yeah, Vader is my father, sort of. I mean genetically he is, but I'm from a different timeline, so…"
"You are confusing her so badly," Leia said reprovingly, striding over to glower at her brother.
"I'm sorry. Father, are you ready?"
Father?
"I suppose," the most terrifying man (?) in the entire galaxy said gloomily. "I still think you should make this announcement, not me."
"Don't be silly," Luke chided. "No one knows who I am, but almost everyone knows who you are."
"Very well," Vader said somewhat sulkily. He gestured toward the holocams, which turned on and swiveled toward him.
"Citizens of the galaxy!" he boomed. "I speak to you from the Death Star, an armored battle station capable of destroying planets. As you doubtless know, Emperor Palpatine is dead. I am his obvious successor, and I intend to take control of Imperial Center shortly. Let me speak now to the Alliance to Restore the Republic. I found the Republic irritating and incompetent, but the Empire has been legitimately far worse. I regret my participation. I regret my position as second in command. I regret serving Palpatine. Indeed, I wish that I had been the one to strike the fatal blow against the Emperor!"
Relinka could not help but gasping aloud and the Sith turned an irritated glare at her, which made her lean back nervously.
"Calm down, Father," Luke said. "You are scaring Relinka and Cray, which isn't fair. Speaking of them…"
Luke gestured and the cams turned toward the two cohosts found themselves suddenly on cam.
"So," Leia said from off cam, "I know that everything is crazy for you both thanks to being snatched from Imperial Center, but we are hoping you'd be willing to help Lord Vader negotiate this peculiar time in galactic history."
Relinka wet her lips and managed to say, "Of course, we would both be most honored to assist his Majesty."
"Great," Luke said with a smile, just a chair moseyed through the air, held by unseen hands, and settled in between Cray and Relinka. He took the seat between them, putting himself firmly on cam, and said, "So here's the thing, everyone; Vader was married a long time ago and a couple of his kids work for the Rebel Alliance. So it is in everyone's best interests if the Empire and the Rebellion work together to sort out this mess."
"I thought you said that you are Darth Vader's son," Relinka managed to say with only the slightest of quavers.
"I am, but like I said, not from this timeline. My sister and I are from an alternate timeline, and are a lot older than our current timeline contemporaries. I know, its all very weird…"
"Super crazy weird," Leia agreed, though she remained off camera, "but it is true. So yes, the Emperor is dead, Jabba the Hutt is dead, Vader has kids who work for the other side, and the ideal…"
"Tingling toes!" Luke suddenly yelped, leaping to his feet and hurrying over to the monolithic Sith Lord. The cams followed his movement, and caught him giving the gigantic cyborg a fervent hug. "Remember what we said about being patient, Father. Your kids have every right to be more than a little annoyed with you. Also…"
Luke and Leia both vanished into thin air.
Author Note: Many apologies for the long delay in writing this chapter. We got COVID in our house and that and my Pride and Prejudice writing took my energy for six weeks. We are mostly better but still have lingering fatigue.
