Bartender Ch. 34

"I can't do anything because I'm a coward." Calliope was drunk, and reached for another pour of glass. The old bartender stopped her.

"What are you trying to do? And what are you afraid of?"

"I'm trying to support my fans. But I'm afraid of them seeing who I really am."

"Do you fear being embarrassed? If so, you're mistaken."

"What do you mean? Of course I feel embarrassed. It seems you don't know what it feels to stand bare in front of the public."

"Well, you can't stop it."

"YES! I SURE OF HELL I CAN'T." B A N G

"You're too drunk."

"No. I'm not. You're just getting on my edge. Why did you say I'm mistaken?"

"Because you are."

"NO I'M NOT. I'm afraid. I'm…so scared.."

"Then let me tell you this. Is it the embarrassment that you really fear?"

"What do you mean? Of course…"

"Miss Mori. It's not the pain you're scared of. You're strong enough for that. Hell, look at your lyrics. It's full of hellish depictions I cannot fathom going through myself."

"Then..what is it?"

"It's not the pain you're scared of. It's the person the pain will inspire you to be that scares you so much. Miss Mori, too many people are afraid of pain itself, but they don't really look at what happens after that. Pain by itself does nothing. It is what it inspires us to be that terrifies us. Miss Mori. You're afraid of becoming a terrible person after you cannot handle the pain your loving audience inflicted on you. You're afraid of what you will do to your audience who knows nothing of your pain."

"...So what.."

"That shows how kind you are."

"That doesn't change anything!"

"Let me tell you a way out."

"..."

"Pain may inspire you to become a terrible person. But it can inspire you to become kinder. What the feeling inspires you to become is not what the demon can decide on your behalf. It's you who gets to decide who you become after you feel the pain. You can be terrible, seeking revenge on your audience and their families. Or, you can be more understanding. Say, won't your fellow hololive crew feel the same pressure?"

"..."

"I say give them a talk."

"...why are you so kind?"

"Honestly, I wish pain was not necessarily to become kinder. But pain does have its way of making a person kind."

"...Give me another glass please."

"Here you go."

"...this is Coke."

"Yes."

"...It tastes good."

The bartender handed Mori a heated towel to wipe her sweat and warm her sorrows.

"What if they don't understand."

"Oh. I'm sure they will."

"But..what if they can't help me?"

"Then…you got to help them."

"Can I really?"

"That…I'm not sure. But I say you're one of the more dependable ones here."

"...I'm not strong."

"Miss Mori. It's not you who decides if you're strong. It's what you do that decides it. Have faith in yourself."

"...I can't.."

"No, you must."

"You can say that easily. You got everything under control."

"That doesn't mean I don't understand your plight."

"You don't. If so, how can you say that so easily? Have faith in myself? You're not even me! How can you say that?!"

"I can imagine. If I were you, I would only have myself to live with my whole life. If I can't escape my identity, I have to embrace it, isn't that right, Mori Calliope?"

"...that's correct. But..what if I'm just born without the power to forgive others?"

"Then do what a person who forgives others would do."

"...why do you have all the right answers?"

"I'm old." the bartender chuckled, and handed Mori another cup of Coke.

Bartender Ch. 35

Ouro Kronii

"I'm wasting away."

"I will be near. Call me when you need help."

Kronii groaned on the tabletop as the bartender prepared to close. He accidentally forgot to wripe the bar top, and it was moist and cold.

"Bartender."

"Yes Miss Kronii?"

"Don't you think you're awfully convenient?"

"...I don't think so. Why do you think so?"

"Because, you can't even pay your bills."

"I'm selling drinks here and there. That's enough."

"...I want you to hear me. You're my escape."

"I don't think that's true. No, not at all."

"Are you saying you won't be here for me?"

"I will be here when I am open. I'm a businessman. I got my own life to take care of."

"Then, what should I do?"

"Just endure."

"I can't..It's so hard."

"It's the only thing you're capable of. Other things just stem from it."

"Then how can I solve it?"

"You can't. You just wait for it to solve by itself."

"...why are you so cruel?"

"...but after you overcome it, you will see the beauty of something you couldn't control."

"...I can't imagine."

"As an old man, I would love to adore you all day, but I still got my own plate to fill, and you're an adult as well. I say, being independent from me is better than me always being there for you physically. But in the corner of my mind, you will always be there."

"...I'm so lonely."

The old man turned on the light again, implying he will offer her another drink.

Ch. 36

"Everybody seems to have everything under control. They seem to know what to do. Everybody else can handle this world, except me." Bijou sipped on her strawberry milk, sniffing up her tears.

"You have my condolences."

"What should I do?"

"Hmm.." The bartender thought hard for a full few minutes. "I bet some others feel that way."

"Really?"

"Yes. It's quite possible. It's natural to do so."

"Sniff. I feel so lonely."

"I can relate to that."

"Really?"

"Yes."

"Then..what do you do when you're lonely?"

"I talk to my friends."

"...what if you don't have friends?"

"Hmm..Then I just do my own thing."

"I see…"

"It's okay to be lonely."

"..."

Bijou finished her strawberry milk, and left with an extra tip for the old man.

"I will be off."

"Come again."