Thanks to no help from Bowser, Grape, Lance, and Jax found the place he was talking about. It looked like a race was already about to start, so they found some empty seats and sat down to watch.
"I've never been to a race before! Ooh, it's so exhilarating!" Grape clapped excitedly. "I should branch out to other hobbies, apparently. This seems so fun!"
"Yeah! Nice to see you again!"
Grape screamed and nearly slapped Daisy. "Oh, it's you. You scared me. Oh...By Grambi's beard, you almost gave me a heart attack." She gripped her chest tightly.
"You come here to watch some races too? I'm going up next. Come to cheer me on, ey?" She clapped her fist into her palm. "I know! ¡Deberías unirte!"
Grape looked at her. "Pardon me?"
"You should join too! You like gold stuff, right? The first place trophy is gold! But you'll have to work your way up there, ya know. Can't expect to be good on the first try."
Grape scoffed. "'Can't expect to be good on the first try?' What are you, mad? I'm Madame Grape! If you can all drive a kart, then so can I! I mean, how difficult could it be?"
"Está bien, I'll take you to the leader of this thing and we can get started! Follow me."
Grape looked and saw Bowser in a kart down below. She glared at him threatingly, and he returned the look, then stuck his tounge out at her.
"Hmph!" She faced away from him and followed Daisy.
Daisy led her to a stall near the castle and rung the bell a couple of times until an old Toad hobbled over. Grape recognized him immediately.
"It's you, the Toad who had done the detective plays."
He screamed. "G-Grape?! What are y-you doing here?! Was torturing Princess Peach not enough? Do you need to take over her kingdom as well?" He fainted before she could answer.
"Strange man, that one is."
"Ey, Toadsworth." Daisy leaned over the counter. "It's alright. She's here to race too."
He got up with help from another Toad. "She's...here to race? But she wasn't invited, was she? She's not on the list and..."
Daisy pushed his clipboard down. "She's not hurting anyone. Treat her like the others, eh? She's not doin' anything so why not let her race?"
Toadsworth fixed his glasses. "Oh, alright. Right this way please."
He led her to the inside, then out the back door to another small building. He opened the door for her.
"This is the changing room and where you can pick your kart. You only need to change if you choose a bike. Please don't take too long, we have a race soon and I need to try and fit you in somewhere..."
Grape entered, having to remove her hat to fit through the doorway. She looked around until she saw a door with what looked like a human woman on the sign, and opened it. Peach was inside, her hair in a ponytail and in the process of getting changed.
"Oh."
Flick winched. "Closssse the door and leave her alone, Grape."
"Dang, I want a body now."
Peach jolted and turned around. She screamed, which made Grape scream and slam the door shut.
"Okay, that was weird. I'm knocking next time."
"Why didn't you check firsssst?"
"I thought everyone was out in their little karts already! How was I supposed to know Peach was in here?"
Flick sighed.
Peach came out, tying a bandana around her neck. "Grape? What are you doing here?" She hesitated for an awkward amount of time. "Did you actually see me...?"
"Dressless? Yes, I did. And now I can't even look at you the same. I'm disturbed and jealous at the same time. You look nice, for a human. And here I am, bodyless. I wonder if I'll be thin like Dimentio is...Oh, I can't bear to think about it!"
"I'm fine now. You can turn around now...This is really embarrassing now. Heh...Let's pretend that didn't happen?"
Grape nodded. "Pretend like what happened? I don't remember anything."
"It's less awkward since we're both girls, I guess. Anyways, what are you doing here? If you came to fight me then it'll have to wait until another day."
"Actually," she faced Peach again, "I came here to race! I want to win that trophy, fair and square!"
Peach laughed. "Fair and square isn't what I would really call this."
"So it's cheaty...beaty...?"
Flick physically cringed.
"You can say that. Here, let me take you to the kart picker and I can explain the rules."
"Okay..."
"So basically, it's a race. But you already knew that. But, the tracks can be a bit...dangerous. We have fire hazards, lightning that can shrink you, an active volcano, you name it."
"Oh dear."
"So in order to make it more fun, we added weapons. Blue shells, mushrooms, lightning that can shrink you..."
"She really seems to like lighting that can shrink people," Grape muttered to Flick.
Flick chuckled a bit.
"There's also battle and coin runners, but I'll go over that if you want to know. You need to use items to take people out to get the top three places. Once you get to sixth place though...You kind of past redemption at that point. You'll probably be able to make it to fourth, but first is a no-go if you get stuck at sixth or lower. There are twelve racers per cup, and the track changes drastically so be prepared for anything. Anyways, we need to weigh you. Step onto the scale please!"
"Why do you need to weigh me? I'm light as a feather, you know."
"Grape..."
"Alright, fine. But just so you know, this is completely absurd and if you will continue to disrespect my boundaries like this, I will have no choice but to-" Grape gently landed on the scale and it completely broke. "How in the holy name of Grambi am I heavy?! I'm nothing but a core!"
Flick tisked her. "Don't get ssself-conssssscience now, Grape."
"Keep talking, snake; you're not over two hundred pounds."
"Okay, so that scale was pretty old," Peach said. "But based off your size, I'm going to put you in the large class, okay?"
"Eh?"
"That means you get all the cool-looking karts. Come on."
Peach showed her the karts and bikes she could use, then let her look at the stats herself. The Honeycoupe and Flame Flyer had the best overall stats, but she decided on the Flame Flyer for the larger build and better design.
"So...what now? Where does the kart come from? Do I need to do anything?"
"Just that button there." Peach motioned towards a large red one.
"But it's so ominous..."
Peach pressed it for her. "There, see? Come on."
Grape pressed the button again to see if anything happened, then left after Peach.
"So, you know how to drive, right? I mean. you had that blimp."
"Uh..."
"Don't lie, sssshe dessservesss to know the truth," Flick said.
"No..."
Peach stared at her, confused. "I thought you would have. But it's fine. Luigi can show you the ropes, his race is just finishing up, and I need to head out for mine. I'm sure you'll be fine! Good luck, and thanks for wanting to join!" She hurried off.
"Luigi?"
Flick tapped her shoulder. "I think that'ssss him. He'ssss wearing green for...ssssome reassson..."
Luigi and a man wearing red were running up to her when Luigi tripped.
"Are you sure Luigi isn't the red one? Because I think Luigi was the red one."
"I'm certain Luigi wore green. Either way, who'sss the other one?"
They came over, stopping when they saw Grape.
"I've come here to participate in your little race! I did show up uninvited, so I hope you don't mind. Based off your expressions, you've never seen me before? Your ignorance is not comforting."
"Didn't Darethend try to marry you?" The red one asked.
"I really hoped you would know me from something better for my reputation..."
Flick sighed. "Mossst people didn't even know you exisssted until then, Grape."
Grape grabbed him tightly.
The red one crossed his arms, thinking for a moment. "Wait, I remember you! Peach said you-a took over a theater! I heard you failed pretty badly."
"Oho...I see. So you've heard. How...pleasant. But for the record, I did not fail. I just lost one simple battle against Peach, because she got in my way."
Bowser started laughing really hard. "You lost against Peaches?! Ahahahaha!"
"Oh, shut it, you heathen! You act as if your own plans didn't fail because of her! At least the Princess has a proper reputation, Mario's just a plump no-life with a big crush on the girl you like!"
"Hey! I'm over her! I've got Rosalina now! Maybe once you like someone, your opinion will change!"
"Aha! As if that will ever happen to me! I won't stoop low enough to actually fall in love! Plus, love is false anyway. How could you actually want to form a bond with someone for the rest of your life? Seems like happy-ending propaganda to me."
"Romeo and Juliet, remember them?"
"They died because of love. That's what makes it tragic and enjoying to read. People will do crazy things for a lying feeling. Isn't it funny? People always say love makes the world turn, but if you look past the curtains of these lies, you will see that it's really not all that it's made up to be!"
Bowser sighed. "No wonder Peaches doesn't like you. You're annoying and stubborn; just like Dimentio."
"So are you! Ta-ta!" She waved him off as he walked away.
"You're really messed up in the head," the green one said, sounding a bit concerned. "What do you mean Romeo and Juliet is 'enjoyable to read?' That story is-a so sad!"
"We're here for a kart race, remember? They wouldn't underssstand the purposssse of a good tragedy anyway. Let'sss change the sssubject back, ssshall we?" Flick gasped in her tight grip.
She put Flick back on her shoulder and tapped a hand to her brooch. "My name is Grape, and it truly is an honor to be here." She bowed. "And Peach told me a fellow named Luigi could 'show me the ropes,' as how she put it? So...Luigi," she faced the one in red, "care to show me how to drive a kart? I would ask my Sour Bunch, but the one I have with me currently doesn't have legs."
The green one raised his hand. "I'm Luigi. That's my brother, Mario."
Mario gave her a look of concern. "Let's-a go back to that part where you said you liked the part where they died at the-a end..."
"I'm here for a race, not a discussion of interests. So what if I like tragedy? It's not hurting anyone, is it?" She dropped her voice to a mumble. "Although, I suppose my tragedy would have hurt people...but that's not the point."
"Huh?"
"It's nothing!" She flew over to Luigi and pulled him close to her. "So, Luigi, are you going to show me something? Or...are you going to keep leaving me lost and make me more and more upset?"
"Okay...We c-can try some-a courses for training."
Luigi led her to an empty race track, where a Flame Flyer sat in wait. He sat in a Standard Kart and waited for her to go into the Flame Flyer.
"Is this one mine?"
"I think so?"
"The color can do for now, but I'm not a big fan of green. Uh, no offence."
"Okie dokie..." He grabbed the steering wheel. "So you need to grab this first, the steering wheel. And you see the petals down there? The one on the right is going to make the car go forwards. But don't press it yet, and not too hard."
He motioned towards a yellow sign. The words and picture were black, and the person on it looked suspiciously like Olly, with an x for an eye. The sign read, "Don't pull off an 'Olly!' Press the gas gently while training, and be wary of walls and turns!"
"Is there something I'm missing here? Is that the Origami King?"
"He crashed a kart when he was trying to join Mario Kart," Luigi said. "Peach put that sign up to-a let people know to be careful."
"How pathetic, he couldn't even understand simple instructions?"
"Sssstop complaining, Grape," Flick said harshly. "The sssooner we get that trophy, the better. And people don't take kindly to being insssulted, jusssst sso you know. The ruder you are, the more you ruin your image. And it alssso increassesss your chance of being kicked from the competition."
"Fine, let's get this over with. I don't want to hold you for too long, so just get straight to it. If push comes to shove, I can always have one of the Bunchlings do it for me."
"Are you sure?" Luigi asked. "I don't have another race for a bit, so we've got some time-"
"Did I stutter? Get to your point!"
Luigi looked a bit frightened. "O-okie dokie...!"
Luigi did try to keep it short, but kept mentioning to be careful on turns and said Grape was taking them too hard. She responded back with the argument that it was a race and they were supposed to go fast, but Luigi was still worried she was going to crash. Flick agreed with Luigi that she was going too fast on the turns, but also agreed that during a race, speed was key. Grape mentioned something about him not being able to decide on one, but realized she was talking out loud and that Luigi was giving her a weird look. At the end, Luigi said she was doing great and tried to compliment her, but she brushed it off as nothing. Luigi was a little sad and worried for her, but said nothing else.
"So, when do I get a customized one? You know, the ones with the colors and symbol that matches the driver?"
"Once you officially sign up for the races," Luigi explained. "Because the training and races are two completely different things."
"What if I already knew how to drive? You might have just wasted an entire half hour with me."
"Everyone has to go through the training before they can sign up. And we even have to retake it every few years just as a precaution. We don't want anyone accidentally breaking any rules. So you would have had to take it either way. Also...why didn't you take the compliment earlier? I really did-a think you were doing a good job towards the end."
"That's none of your concern."
Flick nodded once. "Yesssss, compliments are meant to drop your guard. Rex complimented you all the time, when he was usssing you. We don't want a reapeat of that sssituation, ssso we better play it ssafe rather than sssorry."
"Now, how do I sign up?"
Luigi smiled. "You just have to talk to Toadsworth for that. He handles the paperwork. You could also talk to Peach, she can tell him if you can't find him."
"Ugh, not them again. Look, I'll just ask you to sign me up. You seem nice enough and I'm not planning on staying for long anyway. So, I'm going to join this little race, and you can tell Toadsworth that I'm participating. Alright?"
"I guess I can-a do that for you. But I think it'll be better if you told him yourself..."
"Was that a suggestion? I gave you a direct order, and you will act on it just as I told you! Now, on to the race!"
"She's so...terrifying."
