"We'll only be gone three days. The girls aren't going to fall off the face of the earth," Leah shouted in frustration. "What are you expecting me to tell Mom?"
Leah, Seth, and Jacob had made plans to visit home over Labor Day weekend, but now she struggling to get either man to adhere to their plan.
"Leah, please tell Mom I'm really sorry," Seth pleaded with big brown puppy dog eyes. "I promise I'll find a way to make it up to her, but I need to stay. I need to get a bid from KEN and they gave me a task to complete tonight. I have to make a good impression."
"Dude, they're taking advantage of you," Leah said.
"Probably," Seth shrugged. "But if that's what it takes, I'll do it."
"Have you told mom yet?" Leah sighed. She knew she was losing the argument, the least he could do was break the news to their mother that he'd imprinted.
Seth shook his head. "I haven't figured out how I'm going to break the news…"
"You could tell her in person," Leah suggested.
The look in Seth's eyes made it clear that that would not be happening. Leah knew how hard this would be for Seth. Sue's greatest fear was at risk of becoming a reality. When Seth announced his plans to leave for college, Sue objected. She wasn't worried about vampires or money. She didn't want to let him go out of fear that he wouldn't come back. She had accepted that Leah was long gone, building her own path in Port Angeles. Seth was supposed to be the one who stayed.
His entire life was in La Push, there hadn't been a single doubt in his mind that he'd return one day. He'd promised he'd return, but in less than a week, he'd been snagged away from the life he'd planned. He'd intended to come back with a management degree and skills to help build the tribe. His plan was to follow in their father's footsteps and run for tribal council. All that was now second to whatever Kat had planned for her life.
"I'll call her before you arrive," Seth promised.
A knot started forming in Leah's stomach. She nodded, knowing there was nothing she could do. She turned to Jacob.
"You're going home," Leah ordered. Sue had visited while helping Seth move into the house and coerced Leah into committing to visiting over Labor Day weekend. Seth was already breaking their mother's heart enough for one day, she knew she couldn't bail, too, but she had no desire to go alone. She'd been putting off visiting for the past several months and she knew it was long overdue.
"But what if Nessie—" Jacob stopped mid-sentence. Silenced by Leah's deadly glare. "I'll grab my keys."
Leah sat in the passenger seat of the Rabbit as Jacob curved down the winding Highway 101. They made conversation here and there, but the majority of the six-hour drive was in silence. Leah spent the time thinking about the eventful first week of school while looking out at the forest.
When Nessie was in danger, the Cullens had brought in allies, causing the werewolf population to rise. Seventeen wolves had stood alongside the Cullens, but that was nothing compared to the next wave. The werewolf gene cannot tell whether or not a danger has passed. Between the Cullens, the Volturi, and the witnesses, more than a hundred vampires had been in the area at once and the packs grew to meet those numbers, stretching to include even several cousins in the Quinault nation and a handful of white boys from Forks who hadn't known they had Quileute ancestry.
They struggled to keep the secret contained to the tribe as tweens the size of linebackers exploded into snarling beasts over math homework. Leah was relieved that none of the children had defaulted to their pack. Sam did his best to manage his pack, which Leah's pack had lovingly dubbed the Puppy Pack. Initially, Leah had felt sorry for him, but the sympathy quickly faded. Growing up in a small town, people talk. Everyone already knew about her history with Sam, but now everyone knew the truth behind the cover story. Leah began to be able to tell which boys had phased just by the way they looked at her. When there was only one pack, Leah was able to curb their pity with her bitter personality, but that wasn't an option with the new wave of puppies. She wasn't above bullying middle schoolers, but she knew it wouldn't bode well with the elders.
Leah knew she was never going to be able to better herself unless she escaped the stares. She moved away to Port Angeles to get away from the mess. She got a job at Safeway and took some courses at Peninsula College. At first, she truly did plan on returning once things calmed down, but the more time she spent away, the easier it was to stay away. Her visits grew more infrequent. When she did visit, the reasons she left hung over her like a suffocating cloud.
Many of the wolves had left and the local werewolf population stabilized around 26.
In spite of it all, she couldn't help but feel a sense of homecoming as they drove across the line into the tiny reservation. This was their home. That word was challenged and hard fought over the past couple of centuries, but they persisted.
There was a voice in the back of her head that couldn't help but find the irony of the statement. After centuries of resilience, she was letting herself be chased away by a few boys. Her own people, no less. What right did she have to claim this as her home?
Even her childhood bedroom was gone. She bitterly wondered if there wasn't a place for her here anymore.
It was dark by the time they pulled into Sue's driveway. The lights were on inside and Charlie's police cruiser was parked outside.
"Mom?" Leah called as she let herself into the house.
"Hey, kids," greeted Charlie. He, Sue, and Billy were seated at the kitchen table playing cards. It had taken Charlie a couple years to adjust to the supernatural, but now it was as if nothing had ever happened. Leah wasn't sure if he had accepted it, or if he had suppressed the memory of Jacob exploding into a wolf.
Sue rose from her seat to give Leah a hug. "It's been too long," Sue scolded. "Where's your brother?"
"He got caught up at school," Leah said dismissively. So much for calling during the drive.
Sue took the hint and didn't press the issue with Charlie present.
Leah put her bag on the couch where she'd be sleeping for the next few days. Jacob took Seth's room.
Billy had moved into Leah's bedroom. As far as the state was concerned, Sue was his live-in caretaker. For the most part, Billy was still fairly independent, especially since getting a fancy electric wheelchair, but living with another person was a definite help. Billy's house was now owned and occupied by his daughter Rachel, her husband and Leah's former packmate Paul, and their kid.
Charlie spent most of his days at the Clearwater house as well. Leah had been absolutely livid when she found out her mother had started a new relationship less than a year after her father was buried. And with his best friend! She and Sue had gotten into a massive fight over it—another reason Leah had wanted to leave.
Though she had long since accepted the relationship, she wasn't happy about it. Charlie still feared her enough to avoid spending the night whenever she visited.
It wasn't long before Charlie went home for the night. As soon as he was gone, Leah called Seth and forced him to break the news over speakerphone.
"Oh," Sue composed her voice well, though Seth couldn't see the devastation in her eye. "Where is she from?"
Leah knew what her mother was really asking: Where was he going? Leah listened as her mother asked him about Kat's family and future plans. Seth didn't have many answers. He didn't know much about her yet. When the call ended, Sue took a deep breath, lost in thought.
Sue looked about ten years older as the worry settled on her face. The disappointment in her eyes bothered Leah more than it should. She knew it wasn't her fault, but she suddenly felt guilty. Like she should have somehow been able to prevent Seth from imprinting.
She felt a twinge of frustration. When she had decided to leave, Sue had accepted her decision. Yet, she was disappointed in Seth for something he had no control over? It wasn't fair. Leah knew it didn't make sense, but she felt ashamed that her mother wasn't more disappointed in her.
Both she and Jacob were tired from the long drive and went to bed early.
Leah was woken early in the morning by the sound of Jacob hurrying out of Seth's room. He had his phone pressed against his ear. "Are you serious? …. Okay, I'll phase in sec. Talk to you soon, Seth." He snapped the phone shut and raced outside. She felt the familiar shimmer ripple through the air as Jacob phased.
Sue poked her head out of her bedroom at the sound of the commotion. "Is everything alright?"
Leah shrugged. "Jacob phased to go talk to Seth."
Sue looked at Leah like she was waiting for her to do the same.
"I'm sure he'll give me the cliff notes," Leah said. Sue saw right through her.
"You're serious about quitting this time?" Sue asked as she sat down on the couch beside Leah.
She nodded without saying anything.
"How long has it been since you phased?" She asked.
"A couple months," she admitted.
Sue let out a thoughtful hum, her brows furrowing slightly. "Have you thought about staying with the pack?"
Leah nodded. "Of course I have, but I'm tired of being the odd one out, the girly wolf. I'm ready to go back to being normal. I want to live my life."
Her mom smiled. "Leah, you've always been more than normal."
"You know what I mean," Leah rolled her eyes.
"I do, but being a werewolf has its advantages. You're strong and you can protect yourself and others."
"I know, I think that's the one thing that has kept me in for this long. I don't know what those bloodsuckers are waiting for…" She trailed off. She thought about the Volturi. "And now we have to worry about a freaking Child of the Moon, too!" Leah wasn't the only one who was sticking around because of the threat. Sam wanted to quit, too, to age with his wife and their young children, but he felt obligated to remain around and support his pack until he knew they were safe.
Sue shook her head. "That's not what I meant. The pack is stronger than ever. I'm worried about more… human dangers."
This caught Leah off guard. It had been so long since she'd had to worry about harm coming from anywhere other than the supernatural. "Like what?"
Sue sighed. "Leah, you're a strong bright young woman. I don't doubt your ability to take care of yourself. But there are people in this world who will take every opportunity to take advantage of you. Ever since you were born, I've been worried. It's a dangerous world for women like us. After you phased, I knew I didn't have to worry about you. That you would be stronger than anyone who might try to cause you harm."
"You can't be serious," Leah started shaking in anger as her mother's words brought back memories of that painful day. She remembered the fear and confusion as she exploded into a wolf in the living room, in the exact spot she was sitting now. Her father keeled over, clutching his chest. Leah had reached out a hand, only to find her hand replaced by a silver paw with razor-sharp claws.
Logically, Leah knew she shouldn't blame herself for her father's death, but she couldn't help but believe he'd still be alive if she were normal. To make matters worse, her reception into the pack was less than warm. They treated her arrival as an unwelcome distraction as they had been locked in a hunt for the red-haired vampire at the time.
"Seth and I couldn't even attend Dad's funeral and you're telling me you were relieved?" Leah ranted. She remembered how it felt being stuck in the woods covered in fur with an audience to her grief as she was unable to calm down enough to keep her shape together. Charlie had to be the one to help plan the funeral, providing the support that should've come from her. And then he never left. Spending more and more time at the house with her mother. "Do you even miss him?"
Leah's eyes fell to her mother's left hand, expecting to see the simple white-gold solitaire diamond wedding ring her mother continued to wear in Harry's memory. Leah did a double take as she took in the unfamiliar shape around her finger.
Sue responded to Leah's accusation, but she didn't hear a single word her mother said as she processed what she saw. The new ring was rose gold. An oval diamond sat in the middle, surrounded by a halo of smaller stones. The ring only possessed a single band, signifying it was an engagement ring rather than a wedding ring. She felt her entire body tremble. The long hiatus from transforming made it easier to keep her shape as her anger rose. Even then, she had to concentrate to keep her shape.
"You're engaged to Charlie?" Leah said in a low, shaky voice.
Sue followed Leah's gaze down to the ring. She twisted the ring on her finger. The band on the new ring was thinner than the previous one. It couldn't fill the indentation left on Sue's finger from her wedding ring.
"Leah, I'm sorry. I should have told you," Sue apologized.
"Stop," Leah said. She couldn't handle any more right now. Sue listened. She knew to respect werewolves' boundaries when they were struggling to control their anger. "I need to go for a walk."
Leah left the house to go for a walk to cool down. A small part of Sue's words echoed in her ears as she considered how easily she was able to stroll through the night without any concern for her safety. She made her way down to First Beach. She watched the waves colliding with the rocky shore. She wanted to stay mad, but her anger faded quickly, giving way to an emptiness that would sometimes appear since her father's passing. The thing about grief is that it never fully fades. There are good days and bad. Leah could recount her happy memories fondly and she had adapted to adulthood without her father.
She had asked her mother if she missed Harry, but most days, Leah didn't think about her dad and it bothered her. She felt guilty when she was doing too well.
As she walked along the beach, she welcomed the grief. Grief felt like love. It was reassuring to feel the painful reminder that she still loved her father, even if she had been doing okay.
Leah thought about herself—how she was ready to live her life. How could she begrudge her mother for doing the same?
Chapter Playlist:
Take Me Home, Country Roads - John Denver- Jacob
The House That Built Me - Miranda Lambert - Leah
