Chapter 20
Nellie
Somewhere in the Atlantic
April 13, 1912

"Dine in third class?"

Nellie was staring at Tommy incredulously. They were pressed against the wall of the third class dining saloon as chairs from the concert were removed and the tables were put back together for dinner.

"Why not?" he asked, motioning around him. "You're already here for a concert, ain't ya? Does it make a difference if it's a concert or a meal?"

Callen, who was standing nearby, said, "We could have Leana and Isla join us."

Nellie looked between the two of them. It was true that she had made an effort with her appearance hoping to impress Tommy. But she was afraid of standing out too much in the third class dining saloon when there wasn't a concert to explain her formalwear. But as she saw the way Callen was looking at Tommy, she remembered how dearly he was missing having a paternal figure in his life, especially with Jock being so occupied on this voyage.

"Very well," she said. "If you'll excuse me, I need to nurse my baby and then we'll be down for dinner."

She saw Tommy's cheeks redden at this. Nellie almost laughed aloud at the thought of her embarrassing an Irishman.

"Can I stay down here with Tommy?" Callen asked.

"If you're alright with that," Nellie said to Tommy.

"I'll keep him out of trouble," Tommy replied, lightly elbowing Callen in the ribs. "We'll see if we can find Jack and Fabrizio."

When Nellie was back in her room nursing Isla, Leana was looking at her with astonishment. "Dine in third class?" she said. "Why on earth would we do that when we have second class tickets?"

"There's a steerage passenger that Callen's taking a liking to," Nellie said. "Jock's been so busy on this trip that Callen's been by himself or in female company most of the time. Even if it means he's in steerage with this man, at least he won't be complaining through dinner."

"What's this man's name?"

Nellie rubbed Isla's back as she began to fuss. "Tommy Ryan. I also owe him for getting me out of a difficult situation this morning."

Leana looked at her suspiciously, but Nellie chose not to say anything more on that subject. "Just come down to steerage with Isla for a quick bite. If you feel uncomfortable down there, you can go dine in second class."

It wasn't long before they were back in the third class dining saloon, Isla and Leana included. To her surprise, Tommy had been smitten with Isla. He'd taken her from Leana and hadn't given her back, even bouncing her on his knees and sneaking her bites of boiled potatoes while they ate. They all chatted while the room grew louder as more and more people filed in, more beer was drunk, and an impromptu band was formed in a far corner. Tommy explained his move from Dublin to Belfast and now to Boston for everyone. Nellie and Callen told him of the hotel in Dumfries and also hinted at the strained relationships within Nellie and Jock's family. Nellie was also introduced to a young Italian named Fabrizio and his Swedish girlfriend, Helga. Leana continued to look around nervously throughout the meal, as if someone from second class would recognize them. Nellie couldn't blame her… Leana was technically under her father's employment and her father had been insistent on creating the illusion the Humes were rich and successful while sailing on the Titanic.

"Shall we join the dancing?" Fabrizio said, taking Helga and leading her into the crowd that had formed in between the tables of people eating. Callen followed them eagerly before Nellie had a chance to protest.

"He'll be alright," Tommy said to Nellie. He had taken out his pocket watch and was letting Isla play with it, turning it over in her tiny hands. "Fabrizio won't get him into any trouble. He's too preoccupied anyway."

Nellie relaxed in her chair, taking Isla from him and moving her arms to the music.

Tommy perked up as the music changed. "At last!" he cried. "They're playing a jig!" He watched Nellie play with Isla, a slow smile spreading across his face. "You know, we saw each other dance earlier but never got the chance to dance together. Why don't I show you a thing or two about step-dancing?"

Nellie glanced at Leana who was still looking around the room. It was obvious she wanted to go back upstairs and Isla's bedtime was quickly approaching.

"Why don't you put Isla down to bed?" Nellie said to her. "I'll be up in a little bit."

Leana glanced at the crowd of dancers. "Should I fetch Callen?"

"Leave him be," Tommy said. "The lad needs some fun. He's been smothered to death by you womenfolk."

Leana took offense to this, but Nellie knew he was right.

"C'mon," Tommy said, taking Nellie's hand after she gave Isla away and led her to the dance floor. She looked down at her hand in his, following blindly. The passengers had pushed together a handful of tables, creating a makeshift stage. Nellie watched in fascination as partners leapt on top to dance with one another, their feet moving so quickly it made her head spin.

Tommy did his best to try and teach her the steps, but it was much too fast. Instead, she hung back and watched him dance with a handful of other girls. She eyed the way his hand rested on their lower backs, twirling them around without a care in the world. He was no stranger to women, that was clear to see.

The music changed to a reel, making Nellie smile. She wove her way through the crowd, unapologetically pulling Tommy away from his partner. They joined a small circle of dancers who were on one of the makeshift platforms and she showed him the steps before pulling him up. Much to her annoyance, he took to the reel much better than she had with the Irish jig. In fact, by the time they had immersed themselves in the steps, Tommy had become the superior dancer of the group. She glanced jealously at the band playing in the corner, thinking of her violin that was back home in Dumfries, still in its case shoved under the bed she had shared with her late husband. She'd look far more impressive right now if she had been playing with them rather than dancing.

When the dance was over, the crowd cheered until the next song began. Tommy helped her down from the platform and laughed at her defeated expression. "Cheer up," he said. "Music's in your blood, dancing's in mine. You've got to let me impress you at least once."

She laughed as they sat at a nearby table, instantly feeling her annoyance melt away. "You've already impressed me," she said, raising an eyebrow as she watched him down half a pint of beer in one gulp. He smacked his lips together and laughed, offering her the rest. She declined, but smirked. "I don't think you really understand how much Callen enjoys being around you." She nodded at her stepson who was sitting at a table a few feet away, engaged in a card game with other boys his age.

"He's a good lad," Tommy said.

"Just as long as he's not bothering you too much."

"He's welcome any time," he said, taking another long drink. "I've been a loner for a long time. It's refreshing to have someone who's excited to be around me."

"He's not the only one." Nellie was surprised by her boldness, her cheeks flushing a dark red.

"What was that?" Tommy's face was red as well, but he looked pleased. She waved his question away and grabbed a nearby beer from the next table over, drinking about as much as he had. There was a sudden commotion that thankfully diverted their attention as Nellie tried to ignore the gurgling in her stomach from all the beer she'd just drank. Two people who looked like they belonged in first class were standing at the base of the stairs. The man was dressed in tails, his jacket draped over his arm and his hair untidy. The woman, to Nellie's surprise, was Cal's fiancee! She was wearing a red dinner dress covered in sequins and jewels. She looked much more apprehensive compared to her escort, blushing as those around the room stared at them.

"Jack!"

Tommy was waving towards them, motioning to come over. The man smiled and waved back, nearly dragging the woman over to them.

"You're really in first class now?" Tommy said, laughing at the man's appearance. "Did you bring a pair of tails with you?"

The man, Jack, laughed before turning to the woman. "Tommy, I think you remember Rose from this afternoon."

Tommy tipped his hat towards her. "How do you do?"

Nellie couldn't help but feel herself grow jealous from the way he was looking at Rose. She took another gulp of beer.

"Jack, Rose, this is Nellie," Tommy said, startling her. "Her brother is in the ship's band."

Rose's eyes widened at seeing Nellie. "Do you know each other?" Jack asked, seeing how the two women were staring at one another.

"We met on the boat deck a few days ago," Nellie replied. "And I dined in first class myself last night with Rose and her family."

Rose looked uncomfortable, as if she hadn't wanted anyone to know what she was up to. But after getting a better understanding of the kind of man Rose was engaged to, Nellie decided to not pass any judgment.

It wasn't long before Rose was seated at their table, clapping along to the music while Jack danced with a young steerage girl. It was clear Tommy was fond of children from the way he cheered on the little girl's dancing and laughed every time Jack stumbled on his feet. Rose had relaxed as soon as she'd had a couple of beers herself, recognizing that Nellie wasn't going to give her away. It wasn't long before Jack had pulled Rose into the crowd of dancers and they disappeared.

"Shall we have another go at it?" Tommy said, taking a flask out from his pocket and giving it a quick swig.

"No," Nellie said, glad Rose had finally left and they had the table to themselves. "Tell me about Dublin. Why did you move to Belfast?"

Tommy's whole demeanor changed. His giddiness was gone, instantly sobering up and narrowing his eyes. "You don't want to know about that," he said.

Nellie rested her chin in her hand, taking another drink of beer. "You know I do. We Scots aren't the English. We've been at odds with them as long as you Irish."

Tommy lit a cigarette before taking another drink from his flask. "Then why have you all stood by and watched your Irish brothers be smothered under the English regime?"

Nellie had no answer to this, taken aback by his harsh disposition. He quickly finished his beer before waving over a handful of men at the table next to theirs and challenging them to an arm wrestling match. She was used to being ignored and she was also used to unpredictable behavior thanks to her prudent father. It was telling that there was more to Tommy Ryan than his dancing, thick Irish accent, and broad shoulders.

It was nearly half an hour later when Jack and Rose returned to the table. Rose was drunk from the way she kept giggling and had beer dripping from her hair. Much to Nellie's annoyance, Rose took the cigarette from Tommy's lips, taking a drag before saying, "So, you think you're big tough men? Let's see you do this!"

She backed away from the table before grabbing the end of her skirts and giving them to Jack. "Hold this, Jack. Hold it up."

All the men watched with open mouths as Rose, in her stocking feet, went up on her tiptoes, balancing with a pained expression as all her weight bore down on her large toes, before falling into Jack's arms, drunkenly laughing. Nellie couldn't help but roll her eyes. She was thankful that she hadn't looked like a fool in front of Cal earlier and hadn't looked like a fool in front of Tommy. As she watched him, Tommy had been impressed with Rose's "talent" for a moment, but she could see he was now disinterested by her drunken stupor. He finished his fifth glass of beer and Nellie wondered if he was good at hiding his intoxication, or if alcohol just simply had no effect on him.

Just as she was about to turn in for the night, she saw Callen stumble towards their table, laughing and leaning heavily on her when he came to her side.

"Callen, what on earth?" Nellie said, pushing hair from his eyes. He was a sweaty mess with a sheepish grin on his face.

"It wasn't spirits," Callen said, his words so slurred that she could barely understand him. "I couldn't find Fabrizio, then Jack ran off with that girl, and then some of the boys I was playing with offered me some beers."

Nellie groaned. "Your Uncle Jock will be so pleased to take care of your drunken arse tonight." She turned to Tommy. "I better get him upstairs, before he begins to make too much of a fool of himself than he already has."

"I'll help you," Tommy said, surprising her by scooping Callen into his arms like he weighed nothing.

"Are you allowed up in second class?" Nellie asked as they began ascending the stairs. "We're both lucky we weren't caught earlier this morning."

"Jack spent nearly all day in first class with Rose escorting him around," Tommy said. "Just as long as we're in your territory and you don't throw me over, I'll be fine."

Callen was asleep in Tommy's arms by the time they reached the second class decks, snoring loudly much to their amusement. Nellie knocked on Jock's door, but there was no answer. She tried the door handle only to find it locked. She pressed her ear to the thin wood and thought she heard a muffled voice that was quickly hushed. "Jock? Are you in there?"

There was no response and Nellie groaned. "Wonderful," she said. "Now I not only have to take care of Isla all night, but this one too."

Tommy glanced down at the sleeping boy in his arms. "Why doesn't he stay with me? My bunkmate is never around and young Callen isn't the first drunk I've had to take care of."

Nellie continued to stare at Jock's door. What on earth could he be up to right now? Hadn't he told her earlier that he was free after playing for the first class dinner upstairs? As these thoughts were running through her head, she remembered seeing that first class stewardess Jock had been talking to a few days ago at the steerage concert this afternoon. Surely Jock couldn't be–

Her face paled at the thought. Jock's infidelity seemed to only be a farce to Mary. As much as it disappointed her, Nellie knew Jock's character. She had almost wondered when she had introduced them three years ago if it was a mistake to do this to Mary. But Mary was as tough as nails, having grown up with older brothers and her father and several siblings dying when she was just a lass. Nellie had known Mary could reign Jock in and she could also handle his long voyages at sea. Nellie just prayed that her future sister-in-law would remain oblivious to Jock's affairs.

"Is everything alright?"

Tommy's voice pulled her back to the Titanic. She shrugged before saying, "Yes, thank you. I'll come fetch him in the morning for service."

Tommy began to walk away with a snoring Callen in his arms before turning back to her. "It's hard for me to talk about Dublin. There are things I can't share with anyone."

Nellie nodded. She understood. As the oldest sibling, her mother's death had been the hardest on her, as well as her father's remarriage. She dared not say it out loud, but she had accepted her late husband's proposal to escape her family. This was something she couldn't even speak to Jock about.

"Goodnight, Tommy," she said, opening her own door. Before she closed it behind her, she caught him staring after her. There was a small smile on his lips, but it was the way that he was looking at her that made her cheeks burn. It was the way men running the machinery at the glove mill looked at the women seamstresses when they left at the end of the day. Nellie had only ever been with her husband, and losing him had made her feel years older as a widow. It had been a very long time since she'd felt desired.

She went to bed that night with Tommy Ryan's green eyes burning in her memory. Even with Isla still constantly nursing at night and Nellie being exhausted from that day's activities, she lay awake listening to Leana and Isla's gentle breathing. Was she crazy to leave her stepson in the care of a stranger? But she thought of her first encounter with Tommy in Queenstown, then at the stern, his intrusion into the first class dining room to get her away from Cal, and their dancing together that evening.

Tommy Ryan wasn't a stranger. At least not a stranger for the rest of this voyage, she decided as she fell asleep to the swaying of the ship and the thrum of Titanic's engines.


A couple of things... my first FanFiction ever was a OC x Tommy Ryan (deleted, as it was ROUGH!)

The inspiration for this story came to me through the music and dancing in the third class dining saloon in the movie. I also happened to stumble upon some fantastic music that act as a great "soundtrack" for this chapter and the one before this:

"American Wake (The Nova Scotia Set)" from Riverdance
"Traditional Set" from Riverdance
"Stan the Man" by Arcadian Wild