Renesmee made it to Jacob's house in record time. She barged towards the door. Fortunately, it was already unlocked. She didn't have the patience to fumble with the key and probably would have broken the door otherwise.
To her delight, Jacob was home. He sat at the kitchen island with his back to her. He didn't turn at the sound of her entry.
"Jacob! Oh, Jacob, you're never going to believe what happened!" Nessie launched into her story from across the house.
Jacob turned slowly at the sound of her voice.
"Carlisle is trying to kick me out of…" She stopped in her tracks and her voice trailed off as she processed the expression on his face. "You already know."
Jacob closed his eyes and nodded slowly. "Edward gave me a heads up."
"They can't do this to us," Nessie said.
"Why did you come here?" He spoke softly, but his voice carried across the long room to where she stood frozen by the futon.
"What?" The question derailed Renesmee's train of thought.
He opened his eyes to look at her. His eyes bore into hers. His eyes were haunted. "They said you weren't welcome, and this is the first place you go. Why?"
Nessie shook her head. It wasn't an accusation, but it was still surprising coming from him. He never questioned her presence before.
"Where else would I go?" She said in bewilderment. She wondered if this was a mistake.
"Her name was Trinity," Jacob said. "Did you know that?"
She stared at him blankly. She didn't understand who he was talking about or what it had to do with her leaving.
"Her granddaughter reported her and her husband missing when she didn't show up to her knitting circle," Jacob continued. "They were searching the trails before you ever found her."
Nessie started to realize where his head was at. He was talking about the woman in the forest.
"I never meant for you to see that," Nessie said.
"Would you have told me?" Jacob asked.
She honestly hadn't considered it. "Probably not," she finally admitted.
Jacob's hands clenched into fists. His entire body was shaking. "How many…" he choked on the words.
Renesmee shook her head rapidly. "None, that was it. That was the only time."
Jacob's entire body slunk down in relief as he exhaled. The tension returned only a moment later as he inhaled. "But not the last."
Nessie didn't answer. She had no problem challenging Carlisle, but she couldn't bring herself to admit to her decision to Jacob.
"No, of course not," Jacob muttered. "If this was the end, you wouldn't be here."
"I'm not a monster," she said. Nessie walked forward, slowly crossing the rooms toward him.
"I never said you were," he replied.
"That lady… It's not what you think. She was injured—"
"Stop," Jacob cut her off. "I don't want to know."
She froze by the dining table in surprise. "I thought you, of all people would understand."
"Yeah, I would," Jacob said. "But she was an innocent woman on a hike with her husband. I don't want to think of her any other way."
"What do you want me to say?" Nessie asked. Her family was leaving. Soon, Nahuel would be gone, too. She didn't have anywhere else to turn.
"There's nothing to say. I put in my two weeks' notice today," Jacob said. "After that, I'm going back to La Push."
"I don't think that's our best option," Nessie said. "I think a big city would be better…"
His expression made her realize she was misreading the situation again.
"You aren't planning on going with me," she realized.
"If you want me to go with you, just say the word. I'll go," his voice was robotic like he was a machine programmed to do whatever she requested.
"I want you to decide for yourself," she said. She always assumed that Jacob would follow her anywhere. She never even considered he might want anything else. The thought of ordering him to obey was absolutely abhorrent.
Jacob rose froze his seat and walked towards her. He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her into a hug. She couldn't see his face from her vantage.
"Then I have to leave," Jacob said.
She could feel a growl building up in her throat. "So was all this a lie? What happened to the imprint? I thought you, of all people would be able to understand."
"I do understand," Jacob growled back. "I can see where you're coming from. That's why I have to walk away."
Jacob pulled back so he could stare intently into her eyes.
"I hate Kevin. Not for what he did to Kat, but because of you. I forgive you. And I will keep finding ways to forgive you."
"Then what's the problem?" Nessie challenged.
Jacob shook his head slowly. "You killed an innocent woman."
"But you're not mad at me," Nessie countered.
"No," Jacob answered. "I'm not. I don't want to forgive you."
"But you do."
Jacob was silent for a minute before responding. "I do. No matter what you do, I can't be mad at you and it makes me sick. You came here looking for someone to tell you that what you're doing is alright. I can't do it, Ness. I can't be the reason you convince yourself any of this is okay. I can't be the reason you keep killing."
He took a deep breath and pried her fingers off his arms.
"Goodbye, Ness. If you ever change your mind, I'll be waiting for you, no matter how long it takes," He let her go and started to head for the door.
"Stop," Nessie called.
Jacob froze, like a marionet puppet tied up on strings; her words tethering him in place. She looked down at the floor. The sight of him bound in place made her uncomfortable. He responded without turning. "If you want me to stay, I'll stay."
Nessie shook her head rapidly. "That's not what I meant."
Jacob turned to look at her. "Then what do you want?"
She knew exactly what she wanted. All her life, she had known that Jacob had imprinted. But what did it mean for her? She never thought twice about how she felt about him. Sure, she loved him, just as she loved all her family members. He was like a big brother to her. His presence was a guarantee.
But now, as she gazed into his tormented expression, it was like she was seeing him with new eyes. Possessive jealousy bubbled up inside of her in a way it never had before. Jacob was hers. There was absolutely nothing brotherly about how she felt about him now.
"I want you to want me," she growled as she crept forward, closing the distance between them. As soon as she was within reach, he placed his hands on her instinctively.
"I will always want you," he responded, stroking her cheek.
She growled. "Not good enough. Choose me. I don't want you pining after your idea of me because of some stupid imprint. I want you to want to be with me. Even now."
Nessie felt his hand tremble. He laughed without humor. "That's the one thing I can't do. If you want me to follow, just say the word and I'll be right beside you, but I can't be happy about it. Not when I know you're slaughtering people with no remorse."
"What do you expect me to do?" Nessie ranted. "Go back to school and pretend to be a good little human? Make friends that I will have to cut off in four years and never see again? I don't want to live like this, Jacob. I knew the Cullens wouldn't support this, but I thought you, of all people would be there for me."
"I am here. I will be here as long as you want me to be," Jacob answered without emotion. "But if you're looking for someone to tell you that what you're doing is alright, you should go back to Nahuel."
He said the other man's name like it was an ugly word. Just hearing him say it like that made her feel dirty.
Nessie was beginning to realize that befriending the boy who had imprinted on her was like building a house out of bricks of C-4. For her entire life, they'd built an inseparable friendship, a platonic bond that ran deeper than anyone could ever understand. Sure, she'd seen the other wolves and the relationships they had with their imprints. Sam and Emily. Paul and Rachel. Jared and Kim. She had never seen romance as an inevitability. Why would she? Jacob was her best friend. He fit into that role so perfectly, why would she ever see him as anything else?
Now, Nessie could almost laugh at her own naivety. Why build a house out of explosives when it was so much better at something else? She'd always understood that she was holding the matches, but for the first time in her life, she was eager to light it.
She jumped up on the coffee table so she could reach his face. "Not good enough," she growled. She pressed her lips against his.
Jacob's response was an explosion. Everything they'd built went up like fireworks. Beautiful, powerful, and absolutely destructive. He leaned into the kiss, moving his lips against hers. All the rage from moments before was now redirected. Jacob gasped for air.
"Want me," Nessie snarled.
"Always," Jacob promised.
"Prove it," she challenged. She pressed her hands to his cheeks, broadcasting her hungry thoughts to him.
Suddenly, she was airborne. Jacob lifted her up off the ground and pushed her against the wall. The drywall cracked under the impact.
She wrapped her legs around his waist. He grasped her thigh. His large hand wrapped halfway around her leg. She moved one of her hands to the hem of her shirt.
Seeing her intent, Jacob ripped it from her form.
Every so often, Jacob would start to pull back, opening his mouth to begin the question verifying her intentions. Nessie snarled at him to continue before he could ever get a word out, egging him to continue. She goaded him with her thoughts, challenging him to do what he wanted. She wasn't in the mood to be practical. She'd deal with the consequences tomorrow. She wanted him—all of him—in every way.
Jacob bounded up the stairs with her in his arms. The doorframe to his bedroom cracked under the impact of his rough entrance.
It wasn't long before the rest of their clothes were shredded on his bedroom floor. Jacob made no attempt to contain his strength, it wasn't needed. In his human form, she was stronger than he. There was nothing he could do that she couldn't handle. She didn't want him to hold back. They moved together like animals, letting instinct and desire drive their every action.
There was no putting out the fire she had started. She'd opened Pandora's box. She knew nothing would ever be the same between them.
Chapter Playlist:
I'd do Anything For Love (But I Won't Do That) - Meat Loaf - Jacob
Desire - Meg Myers - Renesmee
Whore - In This Moment - Jacob
