The house was crowded; more so than it had been in numerous years. Brief, fleeting moments from her Pa's wake drifted across her tired mind. Her Ma had come up with the bright idea to host a traditional, or as traditional as it could be, wake for Derrick. Which meant dressing up in all black, greeting everyone who walked through the threshold of their home, and accepting the condolences from people who cared less about them and more about the free food and alcohol that waited for consumption in the kitchen.

She had taken up sitting on the third step of the staircase, facing the door, and hopping up every time the doorbell rang, or someone knocked. So many different faces she didn't recognize filed into the small living space to speak with their Ma and Packie. The resounding 'sorry for your loss', and 'let us know what we can do for you' grew annoying the more times she heard it. Did people not realize that words were just empty promises? Especially ones thrown out carelessly at someone's wake.

Kate scoffed as yet another family walked up to her Ma and whispered words of encouragement during the bleak days. She glared between the spokes of the stairs to see her Ma grasp the held out hands of the female that tried, but failed, to keep from crying over Derrick's death. How this many people knew Derrick astounded her. They were just some simple, small-time family that lived in Dukes. There was no fame or fortune to be held within the walls of their home.

But hushed words of rebellions and hefty takeaways from crimes floated on the air from huddled groups of older looking men. Packie worked his way from group to group and would join in the conversations. She tried to ignore the drugs and money that exchanged hands. They tried to hide it from Ma, but she had seen enough of it. Her frown only deepened with each nod of Packie's head. Could he not respect their lost brother's memory? 'Or maybe this is the way to respect his memory… Lord knows what the boys are into these days…'

His eyes met hers for a beat of a second before he turned on his heel and headed back toward the kitchen with Gordon Sargent. His body language screamed of needing a drink and she felt her own mouth water at the idea of downing a glass or two to settle her nerves. Her fingers itched to grab the banister and head toward the waiting bottle that Packie had stashed away for them, no longer caring to keep greeting strangers into their home. Mind made up, she hauled herself up off the stairs and silently made her way through the crowd, avoiding her mother's watchful eyes.

'What's one drink going to do anyway?'

Packie was hunched over the kitchen island and the telltale sound of him sorting greeted her ears, "Honestly Packie. Ma is literally only a short distance away."

"Katie, she's preoccupied anyway. She won't be leaving her spot till the whole city of Dukes marches through here." Gordon sadly shook his head from his spot next to her brother, "It's bad enough that we gotta stay on high alert in case some idiot gets a bright idea and comes knocking where they don't belong."

"Wouldn't be much of a bright idea then would it?" A younger looking man spoke up from the other side of the kitchen island and she had trouble placing a name to his face. The boy's group of friends grew and shrank so many times it was hard to keep up with who was who and whether they were in Gerry's good graces or not. The headache from earlier throbbed along her forehead and she rubbed at her temples.

"You got that right. Fuckers wouldn't dare." Packie straightened up and wiped at his nose to remove any evidence that he had ripped a line. Last thing he needed was Ma scolding him for his bad habits and ruining a perfectly good wake. The numbing sensation spread down his throat, and he coughed to clear it slightly, his body shivering as the heat flushed over his skin, "Drink sis?"

"You know me oh so well." Kate rolled her eyes and headed for the cabinet that held all their glasses. She could feel all the guy's eyes on her, and she tried to hide the uncomfortable feelings from showing on her face. These were considered family friends, and she had no reason to feel out of place or like an outsider around them. But without Gerry there to be her buffer it felt weird.

"Nope. No glasses. Ma will know then. Here-" Packie pulled out a flask from his back pocket of his good pair of jeans.

"You've got to be kidding me." Kate's hands clasped tightly into fists as she turned back around to face her brother, "And what makes you think its sanitary to pass around a flask?"

"What are we in? Middle school? I ain't got no cooties." Packie had to fight off the sneer and laugh that wanted to break free from his chest, "You boys have some kind of germs I don't know about?" His eyes darted between the small group that was huddled around the small kitchen island where they had all retreated to from the depressing atmosphere of the living room.

The softly murmured 'no's' and 'I'm clean' reached her ears and she swallowed down the angry retort that she had prepared. She had never done drugs and didn't want to accidentally pick something up from drinking after someone who abused drugs on the regular. She narrowed her eyes at her brother and let the death glare match begin. She wasn't in the mood to deal with anything at this point. Her emotions were so tightly strung and all it would take was one good pluck to her heartstrings and it would all come undone- nasty mess included. There was no telling what reaction she would go with. Anger, tears, hysteria, or laughter.

"Or are you too chicken to get drunk again and end up calling up-" Packie started before Kate snatched the flask from his hand and downed several swallows of the whiskey he had siphoned off the expensive bottle earlier.

"I'm a McReary. There is no chickening out." She grimaced at the taste of it and slapped the top back on the flask before shoving it back into his hands, "And no. I'm not getting drunk tonight." 'Never again… Not till I can handle my liquor better.'

"Perfect night to. Once the storytelling starts and the memories get free flowing, everyone will end up drunk." Gordon nodded toward Packie asking for the flask.

"I'm sure some of these stories I do not need to be around for." Kate grumbled and wiped her lips with the back of her hand to make sure she hadn't let anything dribble down to her chin.

"Some. But not all. Derrick had his wild side, but he was a family man through and through." Packie passed off the flask and dropped his hands to the counter. He was getting tired of constantly fighting with his sister. Their numbers in the family were dropping quickly and he was starting to see the end of the tunnel, and it wasn't pleasant. He refused to count Francis as part of the family, especially after not coming to tell them about Gerry. He still wasn't over seeing the dried blood on his clothes that came from Derrick. He shuddered at the vision of Derrick laying on the autopsy table.

"Got that right." Gordon lifted the flask to his lips and downed a decent gulp, "But he adored his little sister. I'm gonna miss him." He lifted his arm to the side and waved his hand toward Kate, asking for a side hug.

"He will be missed greatly." Kate sighed and walked around Packie to give Gordon a quick hug. Out of all their friends that came and went, Gordon had been around the longest. She held a small amount of respect for him on being able to handle the utter ridiculousness that her family produced. He went to church services with them when he was free, he was at every one of Gerry's weddings, and he had been a pallbearer for Michael's funeral.

"Hands off my sis!" Packie raised his voice and scowled at Gordon as Kate shifted away from him.

"Ah Kate McReary! Famous dart thrower extraordinaire!" Stewart laughed at his own joke and smiled when the female on his arm giggled along with him. They moved further into the kitchen to get away from the larger crowd from the living room. He nodded toward Packie and Gordon with due respect before turning his eyes back down to Kate, completely oblivious to the somewhat hostile situation he walked in on.

"Hey Stewart. Thank you for coming by." She forced the fake smile back into place and turned away from her seething brother, smoothing over the tops of her dress slacks. She had been ready to smack Packie for his outburst but was glad for Stewart's decent timing. So what if she wanted to give someone a hug. 'Isn't it part of the mourning process?'

"Think nothing of it. Just a hard couple of hours for the McReary's. First Gerry gets a one way ticket to the slammer and now Derrick. I came as soon as I got the call from Gerry." He bowed his head in a sign of mourning.

"Ain't that the truth!" Packie snorted as he leaned into the island and took the flask back from Gordon forcefully. He swished the liquid around in the container to feel how much was left. He would deal with Gordon's hug later. Everyone should know by now that his sister was off limits.

"Still. We appreciate the company. I'm sure you saw Ma in the living room by the fireplace. There is food and drinks here in the kitchen. Stay as long as you like. Guest book is on the coffee table too, so please don't forget to sign it." Kate recited the mini speech she had prepared for people who decided to show up. She fought hard not to roll her eyes when he held out his hand to her and she dropped hers down to his palm. The blush formed on its own as he kissed her knuckles. She could almost feel the heat from Packie's death glare as it bored into the back of her head.

"Where is the lad from last night?" He let go of her hand and scanned the room before craning his neck back toward the opening of the living room.

"Who?" Her mind spun for a second to piece together some of the more vibrant memories from being at Steinway. She had gone out drinking with Niko and… 'Oh my God… The stupid dart contest!'

"The young man that was by your side. Is he here tonight?" Stewart tugged on his dress uniform as the heat of the house was growing uncomfortable. The female pulled her arm from his and moved over toward the table to see what kind of food was available.

"You mean me boy Niko?" Packie let out a loud bark of laughter at seeing his sister's ears turn pink. The rest of the boys let out nervous sounding chuckles and it only added to the anxiety on Kate's shoulders.

"No. Unfortunately he couldn't make it." Kate's cheeks strained under the false smile. Why wasn't Niko at the house? Surely Packie had invited him tonight. He had mentioned something about calling him earlier after roasting her nonstop about drunkenly clinging to Niko all night. Even Ma had turned a rosy shade at some of the choice words Packie had used. She had then locked herself in her room to get ready. At least that's what she told them.

But really it was to hide from the uncomfortable feelings that wouldn't leave her alone. Her mind just wouldn't conjure the moments spent with him on the doorstep. Or if they even made it to the doorstep. Packie's recounting changed every time he spoke, and she couldn't be sure what to believe anymore. She was frustrated, hurt, and struggling with balancing everything at once. Derrick's death needed her attention more than some mistaken night of drinking too much.

Then why was she so stuck on trying to figure out her movements from last night?

"You okay? You're a little flushed." Stewart's voice snapped her from her thoughts and caused a heavier rush of blood to her cheeks. Packie crumbled into another fit of laughter with the guys, and she forced her eyes to stay on Stewart, who was looking over her toward the people who were laughing at her expense. Even Stewart looked to be struggling to keep from smiling.

"Yes. Sorry. It's really hot in the house. It's okay. Please do stay a while and pay your respects. Excuse me." Kate motioned to the living room before shuffling around him and out of the kitchen and through the crowd toward the stairs. She took the steps quickly not bothering to look toward her mother or the concerned faces that had turned her way with her rapid departure. She needed a break from all the formalities and fakeness. Silently she retreated to her room and closed the wood door, deftly twisting the doorhandle lock.

"Get a hold of yourself! Your brother is dead! That is what you need to focus on. Not Niko!" Kate harshly whispered to herself, stalking over to her dresser to stare at her reflection. She should feel something, anything! Where was all the turmoil from the morning? Had she been so effective at closing it off? She lowered her head and took in a long breath.

After getting home from the police station, things had moved in a brisk pace. The planning hadn't been but a few phone calls and short words between the family. The church in Suffolk had been chosen, as it was available, unlike Columbus Cathedral, which was the first choice of Ma's. The cemetery director had said the grave would be dug and ready before the sun crested the horizon. Everything had fallen into place like perfectly placed bricks, so why was it so difficult to start mourning?

Wasn't the time to let go and start processing now? Or was it after Derrick was in the ground that that was supposed to start? Her cynical thinking was getting out of hand. Who broke down events and feelings this way?

She glared at her reflection, hating the done up way she looked. But Ma had insisted.

"It's only proper to look your best to those who wish to send condolences. You wouldn't want to offend anyone? Would you?"

Kate had felt like laughing or shouting when her mother had spoken the words. Who was she going to offend by not wearing makeup or letting her hair go unbound? They were there to support them not the other way around. But she figured appearances had to stand for something. Ma had dug out her old rosary that Pa had gifted to her forever ago and was even donning the so called family jewels.

She had fought and won out on not wearing make up tonight but would have to wear it tomorrow for the actual funeral. And the thought grated against her skin. She never understood the need to apply so much product to her face just to go to work. And she hadn't been out on a date since her early twenties… Well. Niko's outings were not dates. And she would continue to force that notion upon herself till the end of time. They were not dating… right?

The groan that left her lips sounded so far from her normal voice that it caused her to pause her movements. Once more she took in her appearance and tried to think positively for once. Her hair was pulled back into a tight French braid that her mother had worked on for an hour. Not a single loose baby hair was curled around her hairline. Everything was laid flat and neat… and almost perfect. The black, long sleeved button down was done up to the base of her throat, where the collar was pressed into crisp folds. She had refused to wear a dress but relented to wearing one for the funeral.

The slacks had been her small victory against her mother's wishes. If Packie was allowed to get away with wearing nice jeans and a sloppy black polo, then she could wear some dress slacks. She ran the tips of her fingers over the soft fabric of her pants and smiled at the way they hugged her hips and legs. What curves she did have were at least extenuated with this pair of slacks. She turned slightly to admire herself before realizing what she was doing.

She was up in her bedroom, checking herself out in the mirror, while her mother and brother were downstairs talking to fellow mourners. The huff forced its way up her throat and she stormed over to the armchair under her window and dropped down into the cushions. Something was off with her, and she was tired trying to figure it out. Carefully she kicked off the flats that had created the blisters on her heels and tucked her legs up on the chair. Absently she stroked over the bandages on the blisters as she zoned out looking through the glass panes of the window.

The position caused her cell phone to slip from the small pocket of her slacks and she attempted to grab at it several times before it fell to the floor with a soft thud. She leaned over her legs and picked up the device, staring at the blank screen. It was still turned off from her phone calls that morning and she shook her head at forgetting to turn it back on. 'Not like anyone would be calling me…'

The bright screen flickered to life as she pressed the on button and she squinted against the light. The merry little chime it played every time it came back on forced a small smile to grace her lips. She trailed her finger over the display, checking out the nonexistent texts and email notifications. Then her eyes landed on the phone icon that was bold and had a red number one flashing. 'Odd. Who called me? And when?'

Kate clicked open the call log and felt her heart jump up in her throat at seeing Niko's name at the top of the list, highlighted in the notification of having been sent directly to voicemail. He had called her around the time she had been planning the funeral out with her mother. Her finger kept gliding over his name on the display- should she call him back? It was already dark outside, and he was bound to be busy or getting ready for bed.

Would it even be a good idea to talk to him after the fiasco of last night?

She cringed at the thought of her being so far gone and stumbling around and clutching onto his solid frame. His strong arms holding her up as he would have to carry her up the steps of the home. His firm, but gentle hands cupping her face to make sure she was okay. 'Okay not helping!'

Kate rubbed at her forehead and tried to think clearly. At some point she had lost count of the number of shots she had taken during Niko's obliteration of Stewart at darts. If she focused hard enough, she could remember chickening out on asking him to leave the bar to go to the park to talk. Then Derrick needed help. That had punched through the drunken haze effectively… Until her brothers left the two of them alone and she gave back into the warm, fuzzy feelings of being physically close to Niko.

Everything else was a blur and mashed together. The only other thing that seemed to be willing to be pieced together was her talk outside in the backyard with Derrick. Which at the moment she was extremely thankful for. It was her last real, meaningful conversation with him, and she would hold on to it till her last breath.

But Packie had crowed on and on about her sloppily trying to kiss Niko and the absolute mortification that image brought up in her mind was enough to make her place her phone down in her lap.

"Maybe he was calling to talk about it? Or to tell me he didn't want to hang out anymore… He didn't leave a voicemail…" She whispered inside the safe space of her bedroom. The familiar burn of tears greeted her, and she sucked in a sharp breath. She would not cry over it. If she couldn't find the ability to shed a tear over her brother dying, then it was stupid to cry over something that may not have even happened. 'But what if it did…?'

"That's it! Enough of this." Kate shoved out of the chair and started to pace back and forth over the fluffy rug that covered the wood floors of the bedroom. She pressed her hands to her temples and forced the thoughts out of her mind. There was a funeral to focus on. Derrick needed to be laid to rest. She needed to be able to walk her Ma in and out of church and the cemetery. She needed to be able to throw a handful of dirt onto Derrick's lowered coffin in the grave…

She stopped her pacing when she realized her panic attack was resurfacing.

Her eyes lifted from her toes that were buried into the soft tuffs of the rug to stare at the harmless phone that had fallen in front of the armchair.

aaaaaa

The loud, pounding music of the club only added to the pulse of the headache that formed while out suit shopping. Roman had kept him captive the rest of the day and he was debating making a break for it before Brucie had grabbed his other arm and dragged him back to a half circle booth. Now he was stuck between his cousin and Brucie as they yelled over the music to one another and sipped on neon colored drinks. Bernie had sent him sympathetic glances every now and then before he disappeared into the sea of dancing men and women.

He knew his cousin and Brucie meant well. But his heart was just not into the atmosphere of the club. Scantily clad woman continued to approach the table offering to get them more drinks or asked for a dance. Roman had readily accepted every offer thrown his way, but Niko grabbed the back of his button down and hauled him back into the booth, claiming he was a taken man and didn't want to offend his fiancé.

"NB, come on man! She was practically begging me to go dance with her." Roman shouted over the obnoxious dance beat.

"Dude! Let the beast out! You gotta let yourself live!" Brucie agreed with Roman and downed the rest of his drink, "And while you two sorry chumps sit here with your blue balls, Brucie is gonna go get some!" He eagerly accepted the held out hand from the female that leaned over the edge of the table and was whisked away and out on the dance floor.

"See! Brucie gets it! Even Bernie is out there tearing it up! Niko come on! Stop feeling sorry for yourself and get on out there!" Roman surveyed the dance floor and grew excited when the song changed to one he knew.

"Go ahead. I'm just going to save our spot." Niko nodded in the direction of a couple of women that were beckoning him to come join them. He lifted his shot glass of vodka and downed it rapidly. The burn was a welcomed distraction from the women that sent him hungry stares.

"Fine. Sit here like a stick in the mud. I don't care. But I am tired of missing out tonight." Roman slid out of the booth and shimmied his way toward the women calling out to them about hitting the dance floor for the rest of the night.

"Whatever." Niko grabbed another shot of vodka from the table, forcing the liquid down his throat to forget that he had a soul. Wearily he watched as people lived in their own little world. The music was so loud that he felt the bass vibrate in his chest and he grimaced against the feel of it. Maybe in his younger years, and had he never been through the wars, he could enjoy the allure of getting lost in music and alcohol. But he couldn't ignore the drug deals that were taking place in the darkened corners of the club. Or the somewhat poorly concealed weapons that the bouncers carried.

Everywhere he looked he could see people enjoying themselves while also being surrounded by crime and danger, being completely unaware of the situation they could all find themselves in. One wrong word between a deal and a shootout was bound to happen. People would be hit in the crossfire. Lives would be ruined all because they chose to go out that night instead of staying home. The irony in life was not missed on him.

"You look like you could use another drink? And maybe a quiet room all to ourselves?" Niko shifted his eyes off the two men who were heatedly whispering back and forth to look at the female that had dropped down where his cousin had been sitting.

"I'm good. Thanks." Niko went back to watching the two men and was glad he had his pistol on him still. There was only the main entrance and what looked to be a hallway to the restrooms. He glanced around the room looking for exit signs, he would need to grab his cousin, Bernie, and Brucie quickly and get them to the nearest exit if the men decided to start a fight. The semi-automatic pistol he could see on the hip of one of the men was concerning.

"Good looking man like yourself shouldn't be brooding by himself all alone." She nudged his shoulder, and he snapped his attention back to her. She smirked at getting his attention and dropped one of her shoulders so the thin strap of her top would slide down her arm.

"Thanks, but I said I'm good. Surely there is someone else here in the club that would pay attention to you." Niko saw the two men part ways from the corner of his eye and relaxed some. At least that deal hadn't gone to complete shit. It was one less gunfight he would need to fight his way out of and get his cousin and friends to safety.

"None that caught my attention. Look I'm not into strings attached kind of things. You look like someone who knows how to use his hands and body and I'm someone in need of being used. What do you say?" She leaned in closer in order to not have to yell. Her short blonde hair framed her face perfectly and she tucked some of it behind her ears. Her eyes were completely focused and not diluted from alcohol or drugs. The tiny smirk deepened across her lips when she realized she had his full attention.

A vibration in his pocket was distraction enough as he had half contemplated ditching the club, shutting himself off from the world, and divulging into whatever this woman was offering. He was getting tired of the thoughts that kept dragging him down, and mindless sex with a stranger was becoming more appealing the longer he stayed in the club and downed shots of alcohol. But what would that make him? Had he not given Kate some form of a promise to wait till he made the first move? 'Not that there will ever be a first move now…'

"Well? I can go for the silent type so long as they aren't quiet in the bedroom." She scooted closer, brushing their shoulders together, and placed her hand to his knee. Her fingers dipped down to the inside of his leg, "Ditch this boring scene and come back to my place." Her lips bushed his cheek as she purred the words into his ear.

His hand grabbed hers and dragged it back to the top of his thigh. She tucked her face down toward his neck and started to place butterfly soft, open mouthed kisses to his flesh and he shivered at the contact. Her other hand moved across her body to grab at his jacket in order to hold him still where she wanted him. His blood warmed in his veins, and he sucked in a breath when she lightly bit his earlobe.

"I'm not some goody good girl. There are no boundaries." She moaned the words against the shell of his ear before going back to kissing along his neck and jaw, "But I can get impatient."

The music dimmed in the background, and he turned to grab her hair and pull her off of him. His fingers threaded into the silky smooth tresses, and she bit her lip with the rough treatment. She had stopped her movements when he held her and for a split second he longed to go back to this woman's place and forget who he was for a night. He no longer wanted to deal with crime, mobs, murder, and conflicting emotions over Kate.

'Kate...'

If he thought hard enough, he could picture his hands cupping her face, her eyes imploring him to make a move, to take her someplace else… To be free, together.

The phone began to vibrate again and knocked him from his thoughts, "Hang on. I have to take this call." Silently he released his hold on the blonde woman and slid out of the booth. His body started to tremble as he headed toward the back exit, dodging drunk people that stumbled from the restroom hallway. He had been so close to truly ruining anything he had built with Kate. Not that there was much there between them… Not now that he had murdered Derrick.

He jerked his phone from his jacket pocket as it kept ringing and felt himself stop just before the exit as Kate's name flashed on the screen. He turned back toward the other end of the hall to see if the woman had followed him or if someone else was within listening distance. Satisfied that he was mostly alone, he answered the call, bringing it up to his ear.

"Hey Niko…" Her voice was so quiet that he wasn't sure he had heard her over the loud music and chattering crowd of people.

"Can you hear me? It sounds really loud where you are." Kate's voice was a touch louder, but he still had to strain to hear her. "Are you busy? I can call back some other time. I don't want to interrupt your night."

"Hang on." Niko pressed the phone harder against his ear and shoved open the back exit. The alley was empty, and he was thankful to the silence that greeted him. The door slammed shut behind him, taking the thundering music and yelling voices with it. "Sorry."

"It's okay. I am probably interrupting something. You can call me later if you want." Something that quivered in her voice caused him to softly sigh and take a few steps down the alley away from the club, hastily rubbing away the feel of the woman's lips on his neck and jawline.

"I'm good. Roman and a couple of friends forced me to go to this club with them. Not really my thing." Niko watched the cross sections of the alley for movements. He knew the nightlife was rather shady down in Westminster. Reports of muggings, beatings, and the occasional murder were mentioned on the radio frequently and the LCPD tried to warn people from wandering the streets alone at night. Especially young women and people who worked out by jogging. Some kind of serial killer was on the loose.

"Oh. Um. Still. You are out with friends and family. You should probably go back and join them. Wouldn't want them to start worrying." Again, he could tell something wasn't okay with her. Which he knew there was something wrong, Derrick was dead, and she was probably trying to reach out to him for comfort or as a friend to talk. He shook his head as he had been ready to go to some random female's house for a one night stand. Guilt was becoming a familiar sensation in him.

"They are too involved with the dance crowd to know I'm missing. I- I am sorry to hear about your brother." Packie had called him about Derrick. So it wouldn't be too far out of the norm if he let her know he knew. For all he knew she was in the room when Packie called him. He would choose his words carefully and not let anything slip.

"Yeah…" There was a deep sigh that resounded over the call, "I didn't really know Derrick that well. I remember looking up to him as a kid. He had a dream back then, he was inspired. The Derrick that came back to Liberty City was broken. He probably wanted to die…"

"Yeah, it still has to be hard for you." Niko knew of the problems Derrick suffered with. Just last night he had a front row seat to what Kate and Packie went through when taking care of their brother. So many nights where he and Kate went out drinking ended up with Kate pouring her heart out over how much she loved her brothers and wished they didn't lead such dangerous and risky lives.

"It's hard for my Ma. I'm trying to be there for her. Are you going to be at the funeral?" She was deflecting and he knew it. But after last night, with the way they parted, shouldn't she be more open with him? Or did she not recall a single thing spoken between them? He had kissed her cheek, held her, and tried to show her that he was there for her… Now he wasn't sure what to do anymore.

"Packie called me earlier and invited me. Yes, I will be there tomorrow." He glanced down the alley when a trash bag fell over to the ground.

"I'm… I'm glad you will be there. I'm sure your cousin is looking for you by now." The warmth that spread through his chest with her words shouldn't have happened. He needed to put space between them so he could eventually back away. Save her the pain of discovering all the blood on his hands.

But damned if he did and damned if he didn't want to, "I doubt it."

"Oh. Well. If you want…" Kate hesitated and grew quiet on the other end of the line.

"If I want an excuse to leave the club and come see you?" Niko chuckled at her startled sounding gasp, "That was what you were going to ask me, yes?" Alcohol definitely made him more brash and forward. He could curse the number of shots he had done, but at the same time just couldn't find the strength to care what he did anymore or said.

"Perhaps, come by my Ma's place. But park along Hancock Street at the corner of Savannah Avenue." The confidence grew within her words and lifted the corners of his lips.

"Why not just pull up out front?" He leaned back into the exterior of the club and reached for his pistol as a couple more bags fell over from the trash pile, the metal clang of the lid echoed down the narrow passage. He wasn't sure if someone was dumpster diving or up to no good, but he wouldn't take the chance of being unprepared.

"You will see when you get here. I'll meet you outside." Approaching footsteps forced him to focus on his surroundings instead of the light teasing tone she was giving him.

"I'll see you then." He ended the call just in time to dodge the weak knife jab from a man in dirty clothing.

He moved out into the open space of the alley and quickly disarmed them of the knife, twirling it once in his hand to get a better grip, "You picked a hell of a night to attack me."

They didn't respond to him and only charged forward without a weapon. He thought it odd since they had no way to really inflict harm to him and he easily locked them into a chokehold. He squeezed down firmly till the struggling tapered off and the person went limp in his grasp. Not bothering to be careful, Niko dropped the body to the ground, dusting himself off in disgust. He nudged the body with his foot to check for a response and didn't get one back. With a heavy sigh he crouched down and felt for a pulse.

"Idiot. Read your target first." Niko grumbled as he felt a steady heartbeat under the tips of his fingers.

Kate's phone call came back to him, and he tried to dissect her words. She had called him and invited him over. Or would had if he hadn't finished her sentence, and there was no telling if she would have ever said the words. He searched the man's jacket pockets for an ID or other weapons. The jacket caused him to pause as the giant bird insignia pulled at the memory of Gerry giving him a jacket just like it. "Fucking Albanians."

Niko released the jacket and wiped his hands along his jeans. It was either a very poorly timed hit or just a complete coincidence that he had run into someone with the Albanian mob jacket on. They had been sloppy and sluggish in their initial attack, and it led him to believe they were already drunk or high, maybe both. He poked at the body again with his foot and once more got no response. He frowned at the timing of it all. The staged hit on Frankie Garone hadn't gone exactly to plan, but he could have sworn he made a clean getaway.

He searched the alley for other members of the mob or scouts. There was no telling who he had knocked unconscious and there hadn't been any form of identification on him. He could only hope it was a low ranking member and held no significance. A motorcycle was parked up against the opposite exterior wall of a building and he went back to searching the man's pockets for the key. He had let Roman drive to the club in his car and had no mode of transportation. The bike would be the quickest way to get over to Dukes undetected.

Finding no key in the jacket pockets or the pant pockets, Niko stood up and walked over to the bike. He would just have to hotwire it. Wasn't a huge deal, he had learned how to cross the wires fairly quick since coming to Liberty. Most of the vehicles had different layouts than the ones in Europe and it took him a couple of tries before figuring it out. As he mounted the bike to start work on getting it started, he noticed the key was still jammed into the ignition. He gave the bike a once over to check for tampering to ensure it wasn't going to blow up the second he turned the key.

The bike looked to be in normal working order, and he shrugged at his over cautious way of thinking. It roared to life with the turn of the key, and he kicked the stand up in order to pull out of the alley. He zipped his jacket up to protect him from the wind and peeled out of the darkened alley and headed off toward Dukes, hoping that things would work themselves out for once. He wasn't sure what to say, or do, or how to act around her. He would let her lead and would refrain from crossing the friendship line. He would have to, for he wasn't sure how well he would be able to hold back with the way he was feeling.

aaaaaa

Kate lowered the phone from her ear and felt a whole new wave of panic crash over her.

"Just what the fuck are you thinking?! Inviting him over. Lord above give me strength." She whispered as she moved over to her dresser to make sure she didn't look as frazzled as she felt. The last thing she had meant to do when calling him was invite him over. He was out with his cousin and friends, and he had no business showing up to a wake… Dressed however he was dressed. The thought caused her to internally groan.

"I'll just have to make sure I beat him to the corner." She nodded to her reflection and undid the top three buttons on her shirt. She would need to be able to move her arms freely in order to get out of the house unseen and undetected. Quickly she walked back over to her window and unlocked it, shoving it open as silently as she could. The nighttime air was pleasantly warm, and nothing like the static charged feeling from earlier in the day.

She leaned out the window and spied the ledge that ran the length of the second story. Her and her brothers used to climb out all the time when they were younger to go over to a friend's house, or to a local party they were denied access to by their parents. She swallowed as the height seemed higher up than she remembered. Ducking back into her bedroom, she rapidly slid her flats back on and sat on the back of her armchair, slipping her leg out the open window.

It was tougher in her older age to maneuver out the small opening. She definitely wasn't as flexible as she was when she was in high school and had probably put on a few extra pounds since then. But if she was determined enough, she could manage it. Her hands griped the windowsill tightly as she somehow got all the way outside onto the sloped ledge of the roof. If Packie had done it in the early hours of the morning from the third story, she could definitely work her way toward the lower kitchen roof before locating the ladder they kept hidden up there.

"Okay. Easy does it." She shuffled along the narrow ledge toward the back of the house, death gripping the few bricks that jutted out from the surface of their home. The shingles were slippery beneath her dress flats, and she cursed her choice in footwear. Not only were they the ones that caused blisters to form on her feet, but they had absolutely no grip. The corner of the house came within reach, and she shifted her hold to the metal gutter pipe in order to haul herself around to the back of the house.

Her foot slipped out from under her, and she flung her arms around the metal pipe, snapping her eyes shut as the pipe groaned under her weight. She listened to the noise coming from the house and pleaded that no one would hear her outside. The last thing she needed was her brother coming outside to see what was happening and laughing his ass off at her attempt to sneak out. When no one called out to her from below, she adjusted her hold and pulled herself around to the larger flat section that covered the back porch. The sigh that left her lips was more out of relief than needing to catch her breath.

Cautiously she walked along the flat surface toward the roof of the kitchen and where she could barely see the wooden ladder resting flat against the shingles. Packie must have thrown it back up in his haste to get away from the house when Ron showed up to tell them about Gerry. Her hands shook as she knelt down to slide the ladder down the backside of the kitchen, away from any windows, or prying eyes. She tried to be quiet, but the ladder was incredibly heavy, and it scraped along the rough surface of the roof when she shoved it off the edge.

It landed with a loud whack when it hit the grassy surface of the yard. She paused and waited for the squeak of the back door, but when nothing greeted her, she scrambled over to the ledge to find the first rung of the ladder. She was more steady climbing down the ladder than she had been crawling out of the window, and she smiled as her feet hit the solid ground. She would leave the ladder where it was so when she was done visiting Niko, she would be able to climb back up to her bedroom window.

Their neighbors never used their backyard, and she was grateful for the darkness as she jogged over to the wall that separated the yard from Hancock Street. As her eyes travelled up the tall brick wall, she gulped. Just how was she supposed to climb over the wall in order to meet Niko? A plastic table in the corner of the yard caught her attention and she ran over to it. She would have to hope it held up under her weight as she tested its sturdiness with her hands.

The hum of a motorcycle in the distance for some reason spurred her on and she clamored up on the table and reached for the top of the wall. Her feet shook as she pulled herself up to peak over the ledge. She glanced down the darkened street for one of the cars she had seen Niko driving recently. For once the street was heavily lined with vehicles and she could only guess it was due to the number of people inside the house. There was only a couple of spaces left and she hoped Niko would get there soon before someone else took the spots.

The headlight of the motorcycle shone on the pavement as the bike crested the hill and she lowered back down behind the wall. The engine backfired once, and it caused her to jump at the loud noise. The putter and purr didn't get quieter, and she wondered if they had stopped at the corner or were parking in one of the spots she had somewhat claimed for Niko. Then the engine cut off and silence once more descended upon the peaceful backyard of her neighbor's house.

Cautiously she lifted herself up enough to see who it was that was on the bike. The figure unzipped their jacket slightly and pulled out a cell phone. The dim light glowed in their hands, and she squinted to be able to figure out who it was. They looked taller than her and when they stood up off the bike, she swallowed thickly at how built the person appeared. The streetlight flickered on above them and instantly she knew who it was.

"Psst! Niko!" Kate whisper-yelled from her hiding place on the brick wall.

Niko spun around at the noise and went for the pistol that was tucked into the waistband of his jeans. He wasn't ready for someone to call out to him, and it slammed his hackles up. He tucked his phone back into his pocket and glanced around him for where the voice had come from, "Show yourself."

His smooth, and slightly cold voice developed goosebumps on her arms, and she jumped up from the table and not so gracefully pulled herself up to the top of the wall, "Niko. Up here!"

"Kate?!" His eyes landed on her shadowed form that was struggling to stay balanced while seated on the flat ledge of a brick wall, "What are you doing up there?"

"Sneaking out of the house duh; what does it look like?!" She flung her legs over the side of the wall and kicked her flats off to the concrete sidewalk, "Just give me a second and I'll be down there in no time." Her shoes plopped down a decent distance to the sidewalk from her. It wasn't much of a drop off and wasn't as far as the side she had climbed up from, but it was still going to sting when she landed.

"Just- Be careful!" Niko walked over to where she was judging her jump down. His heart beat a tiny bit faster with her perched up on the wall the way she was. She had already injured her foot yesterday and he didn't want her to do anything more to her body. He lifted his hand toward her foot and stopped when he realized what he was about to do. 'Distance… Keep your distance.'

"I'll be alright. Used to do this all the time with the boys when we were younger. Like riding a bike, right? You never forget or whatever." She bit her lower lip and placed her hands down on the ledge next to her, shifting her body around and over the edge to start to slowly ease her way down to where Niko was standing. It looked easier in her mind, and she gravely miscalculated how it was supposed to work. Her foot slipped off the side of the wall and she lost her grip on the ledge. The movement caused her to twist to the side before gravity did its thing and yanked her down toward the sidewalk.

"Kate!" Niko lurched forward and caught her legs in one arm and her back in the other. He adjusted his feet in order to help him get a better hold of her. Her arm dropped down around his shoulders and her other landed down across her stomach. Her eyes were snapped shut and she held the look of bracing for impact. He shifted her in his arms into a more comfortable hold and waited for her to realize that she hadn't smacked into the sidewalk.

Her hand felt the somewhat rough grain of his leather covered shoulder and she trailed her fingers back and forth to figure out where she had felt the texture before. The back of her other hand brushed along the cold metal zippered edge of his jacket and her body encouraged her to slide her hand beneath it to find the familiar feel of his sweater. Flashes of holding him close, gripping the scratchy sweater between her fingers as she pulled him closer, his strong hands tilting her face to the side, the roughness of his unshaven cheek as he leaned down to kiss her face- it all ripped across her mind, and she clenched her hands into his jacket and button down he had on.

Her eyes flew open as some of her muddled memories attempted to snap back into place. She searched out his eyes hoping he would have the answers she sought. Without even thinking she lifted her hand up to run over the prickly facial hair along his jaw.

Her hands on him had him losing the battle to just set her down and put some space between them. Her eyes held a look of wonder and doubt. As if she was scared to break the moment between them. He shifted his hands on her body to get a secured hold. She wasn't heavy by any stretch of the imagination, but his one hand was rather high up on the backside of her thigh and it was pulling other, more heated thoughts to the forefront of his mind. His blood was still heated from having the close call with the random female at the club.

The movement was enough to break her trance and she giggled embarrassed at having been caught by him, "Nice catch. Thank you. No telling what kind of stupid injury I would've caused myself." She lifted her foot that had the broken blister in order to prove her point. Her shoulder and upper arm held a dull ache and she adjusted closer to his body to try and alleviate the pain.

"I wouldn't have let you fall." Slowly he leaned down and let her legs drop off of his arm. He braced his hand against her back as she found her footing. That had been about as close as he had ever been to her physically and he had half the mind to pick her back up and keep her from thinking too much about what was going on around them. They both could use the break from reality and there was nothing better than physical touch to drown out the world. His fingers pressed firmly along her spine as the thoughts of what he could do with her floated around his mind.

"Thank you, Niko." She shyly smiled and bent over to pick up her flats, shoving them back over her feet. The broken contact with him left her feeling chilled and she shivered at the unwelcomed feeling.

He had to force himself to look away as the dress pants left little to the imagination. The soft material was pulled tightly across her backside, and he yanked on his own jeans to adjust himself when his blood decided to travel south in his body. He shook his head to clear away the precarious thoughts that wanted to surface in him. Had he not spent most of the morning deciding that he needed to put a wedge between them and start backing away? 'Stay focused. She doesn't need your fucked up life.'

"Don't mention it." He shoved his hands into his jacket pockets to keep them from reaching out to her.

"And thank you for coming all the way out here to meet me. Not exactly what I pictured, but?" She shrugged as she stood upright and turned to face him, "Whadda going to do? Can't exactly walk out the front door of my brother's wake. Ma would throw a fit." She smoothed out her button down shirt and prayed she didn't look too much of a mess. The physical exertion of scaling her house and getting over the wall caused a sheen of sweat to develop over her body. She wiped along her hairline and tried to hide the beads of sweat from him on the dimly lit street.

"Wake?" Niko tilted his head as Packie's phone call came back to mind. Packie had mentioned something about their Ma wanting to throw a wake and he needed to make some phone calls before their call ended.

"Yeah. Irish tradition. You get the family and friends together and drink and reminisce about the good and bad times about the person no longer living. Though I think more than just the Irish hold wakes. Haven't really been to anyone's funeral that wasn't part of my family." She folded her arms across her body and flinched when her upper arm flared up in pain again. She bit her lip to keep from gasping or showing more of an outward sign that she was hurt. Last thing she wanted was Niko worrying over her. She gently rubbed along the bruise that was forming and tried to get the throbbing to quit.

"I think I understand. Packie said something about it before he hung up on the phone call this morning." Niko looked down the sidewalk toward Savannah Avenue when a couple of people crossed the street, stumbling around and laughing merrily. Their drunken sounding laughter was amusing even as one of them almost fell over in the middle of the street.

"Explains where you heard about Derrick. I would've called…" Kate followed his line of sight and turned around as she recognized a couple of Packie's friends. The last thing she needed was someone calling out her name loudly in the quiet street and alerting her brother that she had given them the slip.

"It's okay." His eyebrows drew down in a questioning look as she turned around and somewhat covered the side of her face. 'What are you hiding from?'

"No. It's really not. You were a friend to Derrick. You are my friend. A friend to my whole family. You deserved to know the news when we knew. I'm sorry." She peaked around her hand and sighed when the people moved past the street corner and out of her line of sight.

"Don't apologize. It's a difficult time, I'm sure." He went back to watching the street in order to hide his guilt. He knew alright. He knew the split second before Francis even realized what had happened.

"Yeah… But enough of the depressing stuff." Kate slipped her arm around his and tugged gently to get him to start walking toward the corner of Savannah and Hancock, "I do believe that Meadow's Park is nice at nighttime, and I could go for a walk to clear my head and forget for a minute that I have to attend Derrick's funeral tomorrow morning." She smiled up to him and hoped that this was okay. It would give her the chance to build up the courage to ask him what happened last night. If she wasn't able to process the death of Derrick and why she was feeling the way she was over it, then she would work on figuring out the other complication in her life. She couldn't just sit around anymore and mope.

"Sure." He gave her a half smile and let her lead him down the street. He kept his arm stiff where hers was curled around him. He wouldn't give in to the want to drop his arm around her and hold her opposite side. Her shirt had been an interesting fabric and he wanted to run his fingers over it again to figure out what it was made out of. It was soft like her skin had been last night.

She slowed as they neared the corner and she leaned around the edge of the brick wall to stare at her front door. She squinted against the bright light of all the porch lights. No one was standing on the front porch, and she tapped out a rhythm against Niko's leather clad arm. She tried to concentrate on making a dash across the street but the feel of his jacket beneath her fingers was distracting. Needing her full attention, she released his arm and rubbed her hand over her dress pants to try and calm the nerve endings from the constant tingling.

Niko fought to keep the smile from his face but couldn't help it. She was somewhat crouched down and horribly trying to stay hidden behind the wall as she scoped out the front of her house. He shook his head and reached out to her, "If you are wanting to stay hidden and spy on someone, that's not exactly the way to go about it." He let out one of his low chuckles and dropped his hands to her shoulders, "First off, this is the wrong position. Here-"

He pulled her back from the edge of the wall and turned her to face him, "Now the better position is to slowly shift to the edge and look over your shoulder to the object in question. This gives you the ability to watch your immediate surroundings. That way no one can sneak up on you. See?" He moved into her personal space and kicked gently against her feet to get them into a better stance. He looked down and used his knee to shift her legs to a more prepared position, "This way if you are spotted all you have to do is take off. There is no hesitation or need to search your surroundings. You have an immediate out."

Her entire body flushed from the tips of her ears to the bottom of her feet. And she could only thank God for the deep shadows the lamplight overhead created. His hands were scorching her skin beneath the thin fabric of her dress shirt. And when his knee had brushed her legs open, she had felt a pull below her navel that she had never felt before. She flattened her hands back into the brick surface of the wall and looked up to meet his sharp eyes. There was almost a predatory way he watched her body.

"Wh-What?" She whispered at the nearness of his face. She could feel his breath against her cheeks, and it did nothing to help quell the burning blush that splashed over her face.

Niko heard footsteps approaching them from the direction of her house and he flicked his eyes to the edge of the wall and barely tilted his head to be able to see a group of people heading their way dressed in all black. He looked down to her clothes and put two and two together. Apparently, one was meant to wear all black to a wake.

"Don't fight me." Was the only lowly spoken warning he gave her before he shoved his knee between her legs and dragged his left hand down to her waist, bunching into the delicate fabric of her shirt, his right crawled up to the side of her face and shifted back into the tightly woven braid. He dropped his face to her neck and nudged her head to the side to hide her face from the approaching people and light from the transit tracks above Savannah Avenue.

The smell of her perfume assaulted his nose, and he felt the moan press against his chest. She smelled incredibly sweet, and she shivered beneath his hands. He strained his ears as the people walked into their line of sight. He would be able to go for his pistol with his left hand easily if they meant them harm. He just hoped it wouldn't come to it and they would mind their own business and move on.

Kate let out a breathy groan with the way his knee brushed between her legs. And when his face dropped down to her neck, she felt her body go lax in his hold. She tilted her head to the side to give him better access. The ghost of a couple of well-placed kisses to her cheek danced across her skin and the images snapped to the forefront of her mind. Niko's hands dipping back into her hair as he turned her face to the side to be able to place a kiss just before her ear.

"Oh…" Kate sighed as the memory played out and she slipped her hands into his open jacket and bunched into the cotton of the shirt he wore. Her body hummed with the feelings his hands brought out in her and she quieted her mind. The fuzzy, intoxicating emotions from last night overwhelmed her thoughts and locked them away. She dragged her hands from his chest around to his back and bunched into his shirt and tugged on him to close the small space between their bodies.

The people kept on walking giving them no attention and Niko relaxed as they crossed the street. Then her hands found their way around to his back beneath his jacket and yanked him closer. Had he been paying more attention to her he might have been able to stop himself from crashing into her frame. But his solid form pressed her back into the rough brick wall. His right hand immediately dropped down to her waist and he dug his fingers into her side.

The barely audible moan that drifted to his ear from her throat broke his resolve, and he turned his face fully into her neck and kissed the wild thrashing heartbeat. He parted his lips and lightly sucked on the salty taste of her skin. She had started to sweat at some point, and he greedily inhaled her scent.

The quake that raked down her spine left her wishing she could curl her toes in her shoes. She closed her eyes and dug her nails into his shirt when she felt the kiss to her skin. The one large shot of alcohol she had taken earlier magnified the intensity of her reactions. Endorphins flooded her tired body and left her throbbing all over. Every place his bare skin touched her felt like a static shock, and the scratch of his scruff caused her legs to shake against his knee.

He should stop. Needed to stop. But the way she held on to him, shook beneath his hands, had his more rational thoughts fleeing. He flexed his fingers along the hem of her dress pants where her dress shirt was tucked down into them, dragged his thumbs down over her hip bones. The jerk of her body against his knee snapped something inside him and he backed away enough to see her face. He had swiped the line gone with his foot that used to be drawn between them in the sand.

"Kate?" His voice was low, and he didn't realize he had been breathing so heavy. His heart hammered away in his chest, and he sucked in a long and slow breath to try and steady himself. He wanted to dive forward and capture her parted lips with his own. The feel of her hands opening and closing around his shirt across his shoulder blades made him long to drag her back to the stolen bike and make their way into Holland where his empty apartment waited for him. For them…

'Enough… She told you she wanted to wait… She isn't ready for this…' He shoved the yearning to the side and retreated back behind his closed walls where he could keep her safe from him.

"Niko?" She whispered between labored breaths, cracking her eyes open to see his guarded expression. The look crumbled her confidence that maybe he wanted to do these things with her. That he wasn't just trying to keep her hidden from family friends and getting caught being out of the house. Her eyes watered and she darted her eyes toward Meadow's Park. Clearly he was good at hiding in plain sight and sneaking around and had simply done what was necessary to keep up the charade. 'Why would there be anything special between you two anyway…'

'But he kissed your neck… More than just a simple peck. He seemed so into it…'

Immediately she bit her lip and tried to regain control of her body, "I- Forgive me. I put you in an uncomfortable position. I should've known better that people would be coming and going from the house." She desperately wished the tears would go away. She hated when she cried when she got frustrated or upset. She sniffled as quietly as she could and blinked her eyes to force the moisture away from them. The raw pain stabbed at her heart, and she felt like pulling away from him.

Her tears tore at him. He knew he needed to say something to fix it. It went further than it should have gone, and he lessened the pressure of his hands against her sides, "I'm the one who is sorry. I went too far."

"Couldn't have been as bad as me throwing myself at you last night while drunk." Kate released her hold of him and swiped angrily at her face to not let the tears fall. She refused to look at him while she had an internal breakdown. If he could so easily dismiss what happened then she would do the same and feel down about it later.

"What are you talking about? You didn't do anything like that. If anything, I probably crossed the line by returning the kiss to your cheek." Niko narrowed his eyes at her and lifted one of his hands to her face in order to make her look at him, "What made you think that?"

"Packie. He went on and on about what he saw on the front porch. Which… Ugh! I'm going to beat him next chance I get." Kate let a single tear fall as she looked back to his eyes. They were softening before her, and she sighed knowing she had fallen for one of her brother's pranks. She should've known better that she wouldn't have done anything drastic while drunk. And Niko was more of a gentleman than she was giving him credit. He would never have taken advantage of her.

"Nothing happened." Niko shook his head at her and caught the tear with his thumb. Carefully he removed his knee from between her legs and held her waist till he knew she could stand on her own and not falter on her feet. He would avoid touching her the rest of the night if he could help it. He could see the way it was confusing her and making things more complicated and difficult. She needed to get through her grief of losing Derrick before having to deal with him.

"That's not entirely true, right?" Kate let him touch her and move her around. While a month or two ago she would've felt uncomfortable or scared to be in someone's personal space, this felt good. She reached up and placed her hand over the back of his against her face, "I agreed to let you walk me to the door, and I do believe I owe you a… date." She smiled at his laugh.

"A date huh? These are dates now?" He backed away from her and turned back toward the park, holding out his arm for her to take. Her bringing up the bet lifted some of the guilt from him. She at least remembered their agreement and she hadn't complained about it.

"Oh shut up. You know what I mean. A bet is a bet. And you definitely won the dart match." She let out a watery sounding laugh and hooked her arm through his, "But maybe one day. Once I know you aren't running around doing shady criminal things. I…" She glanced down her street to the empty front porch as they crossed over toward the park. Could she be okay dating him knowing he had been a criminal? Even if he quit that didn't erase the things he did. But it had to mean something if he gave it all up and worked toward a better life.

"You don't want to get close to someone who may end up in jail or killed for the line of work they do. I understand." Niko escorted her across the street and down the couple of steps into Meadow's Park. The giant metal globe was illuminated by a bunch of tiny spotlights and the trickling of water from the fountains created a soft ambiance to the area. The air was cooler in the open space of the park, and he was thankful for the breeze. The sky still held the ominous looking rain clouds, but so far it had held off.

"Derrick's death only solidified my fears. I think he was almost ready to seek out help for his addiction. But whatever crazy mess he got himself into ended up catching up to him. Now he's left behind four siblings and a grieving mother. Gerry is locked away for who knows how long. Francis can't be bothered to come by the house anymore. And Packie is on the fast track to harder crime. It's terrifying to know it can all end so quickly." She gazed around the large pool of water that rested beneath the sphere.

"Sometimes all I want is a new beginning. A chance to start over." Kate sighed and moved away from his arm and walked over to the shallow fountain. She craved to find a new beginning and to be rid of the constant fear of losing her family. Which was a crazy notion. They were already leaving her behind faster than she could keep up.

Derrick was dead.

Gerry was in prison.

Francis was moving up the ranks and wouldn't have time for her once he took over the LCPD.

And Packie… He would fill in for Gerry's absence, she was sure.

That left her aging Ma. And there was no telling how much longer she had with her. That was a thought she refused to acknowledge.

Carefully she lowered down to sit upon the ledge of the fountain and hugged her body. Why couldn't she just forget it all and look to a better future? Her biological clock, as her mother had put it once, was ticking away from her. Her chances of starting her own family were looking more and more bleak with each passing year. But her inner dialog couldn't be bothered to look toward anything other than the constant stress of what her brothers were doing. But if that was really true… Then why hadn't she actively been trying to change their path?

And once more she found herself worrying over her own life instead of grieving and processing Derrick's death. She closed her eyes and dropped her head down. 'What is wrong with me?'

"I once told my cousin that there is no such thing as a new beginning. With every day we live, we pick up new baggage, baggage we must carry with us for the rest of our lives. There's no dropping it and pretending we are fresh and clean, just because we get off a boat in a new place." Niko walked over to her and sank down next to her, "Do not let the death of your brother consume you. There will never be a day where you can simply forget and move on. He will be with you the rest of your life. There is no simple way to process it all and move forward."

She watched him as he spoke next to her letting the words sink down into her soul. It was somewhat true. Everyone learned something new every day that would never be forgotten completely. Once words are spoken, they can never be taken back. For all his misgivings and darker sides, Niko was very intellectual and was one of the things she found the most attractive about him. He always knew what to say when she was close to hitting rock bottom.

Tears once more flooded her eyes and tumbled down over her cheeks. She leaned into his side and took a shuddering breath. She would be okay with time. And while she kept trying to find a way to get over Derrick's death and forget it, Niko reminded her that he would never be able to leave her mind. Derrick would always be with her, and the thought brought a smile to her face.

"Thank you, Niko. You've always known just what to say and do." She rested her head against his shoulder and watched as a couple of leaves fell off of the trees surrounding the park. The wind rushed across the water and changed the tempo of the fountains for a second. The busy city noise was distant, and she found a tranquility in the park with Niko at her side. She nuzzled her cheek into the worn down leather of his jacket and let her heartbeat settle into a comfortable pace.

Niko knew the line was beyond blurred between them. He had no idea where he stood with her. In his own mind he knew he needed to get away from her. It would only be a matter of time before things came to light and the scorn would be hard to shake. There would never be a time that he felt right with letting her know he had killed Derrick. Not today, not tomorrow, and not ten years from now. He would need to decide here and now if he was willing to live with the secret for the rest of their lives.

Could he stomach being with her knowing that deep down he had caused her pain?

Even if he longed to find happiness and a peace in the world- what price would be worth it? Would risking Kate's happiness be the penance in order to gain his own?

'No…'

"Don't thank me." Niko shifted his arm around her and pulled her in closer, leaving his hand on her side. "You have no idea the damage I have brought you and your family. I don't know how to be anything but a killer. You will only be hurt by me in the end." He sighed as he spoke the words in Serbian knowing he would never find the strength to tell her in English. She deserved someone who hadn't killed her brother. But he couldn't deny himself the comfort of holding her, even as his mind scolded him for giving in.

She didn't understand a word he spoke but enjoyed listening to him speak in a different language. He sounded so dejected and hurt though and she snuggled into his side to comfort him. She rested her hand on his knee and drifted her fingers over the stiff material of his jeans, "If you ever needed to talk or needed someone, I'm here for you. You've shown up two days in a row for me. It's time I return the favor." She leaned up against his shoulder to see his pensive face.

"Why do you think I keep showing back up?" He looked down at her eyes and held his breath at how close they were.

"I ask myself that question every day. I have no clue why you put up with me. I'm a lousy drunk. I complain about everything and have the worst outlook on life. After the first night we went drinking I thought for sure you were done with me. But you called me the very next day to check on me. This has to be going somewhere between us. It can't simply be a favor to Packie anymore." She glanced back and forth between his eyes and drank in the sorrowful and pained expression that soaked his irises.

"It never was a favor for Packie. I wanted this." He turned slightly toward her and brought up his free hand up to cup the side of her face. He stroked over her smooth skin with his callused fingers wishing he could just give in. His mind knew better but his heart was aching to just be loved for once.

"I want this." Kate whispered into the peaceful surrounding park. She wanted nothing more than to break the barrier between them and reach out to him. He always looked so lonely and hurt, and her heart cried out to her to help him- to be that person who lifted him out of the darkness and showed him the brighter path in life. And for him to guard her fragile and weakened heart.

Niko lowered his lips toward hers, needing to cross the line completely. To surrender to his need to find someone to balance him out. To be the one that told him everything was okay. To finally not feel like he carried the world's burdens on his shoulders. He brushed his nose against hers and watched as her eyes fluttered closed. Her small hand gripped his forearm gently, encouraging him on.

'You killed Derrick…

Darko is still out there. Do not forget the promise you made to all your friends. You will make the one responsible pay for what they did. If the mafia could see you now, they wouldn't hesitate to put a heavy target on her back. She would never be safe so long as you work for them…

Stop…

Don't do this to her…'

Niko paused before he placed his lips against hers. His fingers twitched against her side and face. There she was waiting for him to make the first move and he found himself scared to. She would be targeted as much as Roman had been. There was no way Dimitri would let it go if he found out he was dating someone. Roman had been kidnapped for simply being his cousin.

No. He would wait. If that was still an option now that he was at the edge of their line.

"Kate. Forgive me. I… I want this. Just…" He leaned his forehead against hers and tried to find the right thing to say. His mind grew silent in his time of need. What does one say to lessen the blow?

"Niko… Please. Am I not…? Do you not like me?" Her heart had to have stopped. Her chest was so incredibly tight, and it was getting difficult to breathe. She grabbed at his arm to keep him from backing away. Her eyes blinked open to see the conflict cross his features and it ripped her tattered heart more than what she could handle.

"No, no. Nothing like that. I care very much for you. I just-" He backed away to watch as her face crumbled, and her bottom lip trembled before a couple of tears escaped from her heartbreaking eyes.

"It's okay if you don't want me. I know I'm inexperienced and a complete mess. It's nothing I haven't heard before." Kate's breathing grew uncontrolled, and she felt weak, faint, as if her body was shutting down on her. She tore her gaze away from him and over her shoulder to the water that rippled in the fountain. She dropped her hand to her lap and tried to lean away from his hand that was still caressing her cheek.

"Stop it, Лепа (Lepa)." Niko lifted his other hand to cup her other cheek and force her to look back up to him, he knew she was fighting him, and he felt his own heart seize with her words. Could she not see how much he cared? How much he longed to be with her? He worked himself into exhaustion to find a way out of the criminal world. He made every excuse to his employers to get some spare time to hang out with her. Even his cousin was starting to feel neglected from all the canceled plans in order to spend the evening with Kate.

"There are things I don't want to involve you in. Things that would put you in grave danger. You have to know by now how much you mean to me." Niko thumbed her tears away as they continued to fall from her eyes. She kept her focus away from him and he forcefully lifted her face back up to him, "Please. Look at me."

"I-I don't want to see rejection." She mumbled the words and sniffed between his hands. What had she done to get them to this point? Was she reading everything wrong? Her soul no longer cared about the danger he involved himself in. They had moved past preconceived notions and hard lines. They had spoken in depth about their shared past anguish and trauma. They had grown close in such a short amount of time. 'Were we not meant to? Were we not meant to be together?'

"Not rejection." Niko lowered his voice as he brushed away more tears, "Please, Katie. Just look at me."

She shuddered in a deep breath and raised her eyes to meet his. There was a mirrored pain there and it broke what was left of her resolve, "I'm so sorry Niko. I never meant to hurt you." There was no mistaking the tightness of his jaw, the hurt that was splashed across his eyes, or the way his nostrils flared at her words. She had definitely ruined the friends only agreement between them and now she was bound to lose him too. All because she had dared to tempt fate. The stuttered sob shook in her chest, and she closed her eyes to stop seeing his pain.

"No. I'm the one who is sorry. I let myself want something I shouldn't have." Niko pressed his forehead to hers again and tired to steady the wild beat of his heart, "But I don't care anymore about what should be or shouldn't be."

He tilted her face in his hands and gently pressed his lips to hers. Let everything else be damned. He could see how much she returned his feelings with the way she was breaking in his arms. One night couldn't hurt to let go and forget. He could go back to digging himself out of the mafia's reach tomorrow. Her lips trembled beneath his before she pressed hers to his. She felt so unsure, and he shifted back to give her a small space, making sure he kept her firmly in his grasp.

"I… Let me in Kate." He pressed his lips to hers once more and trailed his fingers from one of his hands down to her jaw, before sliding them back to her tightly braided hair. He kept his one hand on her cheek to steady her. She had gone completely still in his hold, and he worried that maybe he shouldn't have kissed her.

Kate had frozen with his first kiss. The spinning that had been going uncontrolled in her mind screeched to a halt and nothing was giving her advice on what to do or how to return his kiss. His lips were so soft and tantalizing pressing against her own. She somehow managed to return the same pressure before he had spoken something to her, but her brain was fried and not comprehending anything. His hands were moving on her, and she sighed at the burst of life that fluttered through her. Then his lips were on hers again and she focused on his touch and the way he moved his lips against hers. She would show him that she wanted this and leave nothing to be interpreted incorrectly.

She started to respond to his tender kissing, and he felt an absurd amount of relief rush over him. Timidly her hands lifted to bunch into the opening of his jacket, and he encouraged her on by adding more force behind his lips. He could tell she wasn't very experienced, but he knew that going in. He directed her on how to return the kiss by placing kiss after kiss to her waiting lips, changing the angle and pressure.

Then the unexpected happened. She pulled on his shirt to lean into her, and she sucked his bottom lip between hers and softly bit him. His fingers dug down against her flesh as she released his lip, "Kate." Her name was nothing but a rush of air as it escaped his mouth.

"Niko. I don't know what to do here. You're going to have to show me." She opened her eyes to see his smolder in the darkness of the night. Her hands shook where she gripped his shirt and she released the fabric to smooth over the wrinkles she had made, "I'm scared of doing something wrong…"

"You can't do anything wrong…" Niko leaned back in to capture her lips, "I'm the one breaking all the rules." He spoke the words against her lips and kept placing kiss after agonizing slow kiss to her.

Her mind was fogging the longer he kept kissing her, and all she could keep feeling was the need to be closer to him. She dragged her hands over his toned chest and down to his sides wanting to hold him. Nothing felt wrong in any sense of the word, and she let everything go from her tired mind and heart. Let Niko lead her down the unknown path that had been avoided for so long. There was an excitement in the unknown territory she was getting to explore, and a burning sensation flashed against her skin when he hauled her to his chest.

They broke apart to breathe, and Kate leaned into his body and tucked her face down to his neck. His arms encircled her and held her close. It was a comforting place to be, and she didn't want to leave it any time soon, "Wow… I- My first kiss." Her fingers lifted to trace over her tingling lips.

"And not your last either." Niko chuckled with her lack of words and kissed the top of her head that was pressed firmly into the crook of his neck, "I guess we need to figure out exactly what we are now. I don't think I can just go back to friend's only."

"No… I know this is unconventional. I will be worried sick every day knowing you are out in the city doing Lord knows what. We are going to have to find a way to balance it all. I'm not even sure how Packie will take it." She wanted to laugh, cry, sing for joy all at the same time. But the reality of their situation was not an easy one. It was daunting and dangerous.

"We could hide in plain sight. Only allow ourselves moments like these when we are alone. If that makes it easier on you till we find the right time to confront your family." Niko rubbed his hand along her back and let his thoughts drift through every interaction he had with her while in the presence of her family.

"And how do you supposed we get alone? I don't exactly think making out in public is… well?" Kate shifted out of his hold to look him in the eye. Not that she minded right now, but as they grew closer, she knew it would be harder and harder to ignore feelings and wants.

"You can always come to my apartment-"

"Niko!" Kate nearly yelled his name before remembering where they were, and she couldn't be sure if any of her family's friends were out in the park taking their own breather from the wake.

"I am not going to pressure you into anything you don't want to do. I was suggesting my apartment because I have a pool table there. It would give us a chance to be who we want to be with each other. Steinway may not be much of an option any longer if you plan on sitting in the booth next to me." He smirked at the blush that bloomed across her cheeks and nose. She had this adorable look when caught off guard and he couldn't help himself- He leaned forward, watching her eyes for any hesitation, seeing none he closed the distance and kissed her once more.

The electricity his touch produced in her sent a shockwave down her spine. The thought of being totally alone with him terrified her as well as excited her to the ends of the world. Her control wouldn't have to be tested. She could act, do, move, talk however she wanted. Her fingers itched to grab his face and let some of the more adventurous thoughts lead her response to him.

He broke away for air and rested his forehead against hers. He would need to slow down soon, or he was going to suggest they go there now. He felt warm, heated, and nearing desperation on what to say or do now that the wall between them had been demolished.

"We should probably head back to the house. If Packie is as pissed off as I think he is, he will go looking for me. Will you go to the front door? I can sneak back in the house and let you in. I'll say I invited you. Strange you weren't invited already." Kate trailed her fingers over his scruff and longed to have it drag across her neck again.

"If you want me to, I can." Niko closed his eyes when her fingers kept up their light stroking of his cheeks and jaw.

"Please? I could use the support having you there brings me. Plus, Ma will be overjoyed to see you again." She cupped one of his cheeks and dropped her other hand to his shoulder, "Unless you need to get back to your cousin and friends?"

"If they haven't called by now then they aren't missing me. I would much rather be here right now." His eyes locked on to hers and smiled seeing the relief and happiness there.

"Okay. Then help me up over the wall so I can climb the back of the house into my room." Kate went to stand before his hands pulled her back down into his arms.

"You climbed out of your bedroom window?" He gave her a serious look, not liking the risk or potential for injury that entailed.

"To see you, yes. I couldn't go out the back door because Patrick and the gang is in there, and Ma would have stopped me in the living room." Kate snuggled down into his arms and felt herself relax. There was a security being within his arms. A new sensation to revel in when they were alone.

"Alright I'll walk you over to the brick wall and get you over it. I will give you several moments to reach your room before knocking on the door. Sound like a plan?" He tucked a curl behind her ear and couldn't keep the sappy smile from his face.

"Sounds like a plan. Can't wait to see you inside with all the guys." She stood up and linked their fingers together as they headed out of the park and back to the place Kate had jumped down from. She got in the ready position with Niko's cupped hands before a loud-

"OI! That's me sis! Hands off!"