I hate the stars.
I don't care to keep track of anything anymore. Time had slipped away; I could see only the deep expanse of space which existed beyond my prison. Each winking light glaring from a billion miles away. They never disappeared, no matter how many times I willed them gone. That endless expanse, taunting my stillness with its constant dynamism.
I hate Philemon too, but the man doesn't dedicate his existence to smothering me, so. Stars. Minako Arisato hates stars.
I constantly looked back. Back on the days with SEES. The good ones, at least. With me and Junpei laughing over the latest game he found, or Yukari marveling over my inexplicable skill in archery, or Mitsuru lamenting about her family history to me over tea. Those days were close to my heart, I would never give them up, especially since nothing like that would ever occur again.
Within the nothing that surrounded, it happened with a bang, a small blue butterfly appearing in a clap of thunder that blasted even light aside, gifting me a brief instant free of my twinkling bullies.
Philemon's unsubtle entrance was unusual. Popping in unannounced in my room was more his style. Usually to whine and crow about something ridiculous. I suppose here he didn't have to worry about waking up the entire dorm room.
I could not speak, but nonetheless, knowing Philemon could hear me, I made sure to direct my thoughts towards him, just so he could hear how annoying I thought he was loud and clear.
His suave, slick voice assailed my ears, "Come now, my friend. There is hardly a need for such unpleasantries, no? I come bearing a curse, after all."
The Butterfly glowed a brief white light, and I felt an -invitation- in my head manifest -or, no- no, this was just how Philemon communicated. Concepts, images, feelings. A liminal centrifuge that separates all the idea goop in your head into least to most dense and uses the densest parts to communicate a concept.
Or, at least this is how Philemon communicates when he isn't sure how to word something.
'A curse?' I thought, sneer pushing against my unmoving face, 'another one? I'm already sitting pretty for all eternity. Not to mention my life before that wasn't a fucking blessing that's for sure.' In truth, that didn't bother me too much. Well, it did, but it was offset. Either I sealed Nyx or everyone died.
The butterfly floated down, landing silently on my golden nose "Yes. A curse, my friend, not a kindness. Elizabeth convinced me."
'Elizabeth convinced you to do something? What a ridiculous notion. How the hell did she do that?'
"You have no faith in her these days, you used to love her so. She beat me in cards, poker, specifically."
'She cheated.'
Philemon chuckled, his wings flapping once, prompting an -ace up her sleeve- to come to mind. "She cheated. I never specified that she couldn't."
I grinded mental teeth against each other. This bastard.. 'You wanted her to win? What do you want from me?'
"Well, in all fairness, I didn't want this at all. I find your situation so very poetic, you see, even grumpy old Nyar was impressed. But I believe you should take all things into consideration. So I come with a curse."
'Fine. Explain it first.'
"Of course. Elizabeth has convinced me to give you another 'chance' at life."
Another chance at life, Elizabeth? Really? 'Elizabeth thinks I want to torture myself?'
"Yes. Do you?"
'Not particularly. But you'd never come here if you thought I wouldn't agree.'
Philemon's wings fluttered happily, "Quite so, quite so. You see, dear Minako, I have the perfect candidate for you. Elizabeth, bummer that she is, specified-" -happiness-
I felt a snort rise in me, making sure to send as much of that feeling over to Philemon as possible.
Philemon mirrored my noise, -Childish- "But nevertheless I found one I thought you might like. Would you like to hear about it?"
I gave the mental equivalent of a beckon
"It is a place with superpowers, and heroes. Heroism is a profession many take on, for any number of reasons."
I blanched, why the fuck would Philemon think I'd be happy in somewhere with a bunch of fakes? I am historically very anti-hero, and I thought that was clear.
"Indeed, it is. But don't think either of us have forgotten your dream."
'Fuck off, Philemon. My dream was crap, you taught me that.'
"No dream is crap." He said in a moment of uncharacteristic seriousness, "That's what dreams are for."
'Wish I believed that.' Things were simpler back when I still thought my heroic childhood dreams were possible.
"Of course. But if you don't mind, I'll get back to explain that place?"
'Go on.'
"That world is full of hope. But at the same time, deep within, a darkness lurks."
'Tragic. This isn't enough for me, Philemon. I've seen enough 'darkness' for ten lifetimes.'
Philemon was silent for a moment, his wings still across my nose. I felt no small amount of vindictive pleasure at having silenced my equivalent of Navi.
Finally, his wings beat, fluttering quietly as his voice rang out again,"I know just how to convince you. Have I ever explained to you what the human unconscious is like?"
'No.'
"It's like a trampoline, one where the weight of you is measured by desire. Each individual mind is but a blip in the flat plane, but when enough get together, it can do something extraordinary. Nyx was the result of this, enough people desired death, and it created a big enough indent in the human unconscious that a god could come to fill the gap."
Nyx was made by humans, something I already understood, but I'd always thought it was the Kirijou group's fuckup that really solidified it. Knowing it was just pure want for death... I felt the tiniest twinge of regret. I pushed it down, shoving it into the deepest pits of my mind.
"Usually this would be fine. I don't particularly care, since most of the time any god that gets made by human desires is something that can be wielded by humans, a shadow of what it should be. But much like your home, this world that I offer has something of an anomaly."
'An anomaly. Really. Greatttt. Get on with it, please?'
"Patience, dear Minako. You see, there is a man there, who within himself holds thousands of souls, and all of them want one thing."
I felt a flinch from deep within my soul, this guy had to be kidding me.
"Death."
'So what. What does it matter?'
"You know exactly why, dear Minako. Soon enough, that desire will conjure a new Erebus and call a new Nyx. Such a thing is fine by me, but since Elizabeth has me beat, I thought: Minako Arisato would never allow such a thing."
I.. Philemon was right. It pained me, but if I had to cage one Nyx, then what was one more?
"Ah ah ah, nope. You see, Minako, you are a" -cage- "And you will take it with you. If Nyx is already there, then those souls can't create a new one. No matter how much they try to burst my eardrums."
I made every effort to ignore the vision he'd just given me. So what? I just go there, live life and everything's a-ok? After so many resets, after so much strife and pain. The idea of winning against Nyx just by existing was insulting.
"No. Not really. If you do nothing there's no telling how long that fellow will live. So - do go ahead and kill him, won't you? It'd be quite convenient. Why, I'd even let you weasel out of giving me a birthday gift if you took this on!"
Much the same, the idea of existing just to kill one guy was irksome. How did he compare to Nyx?
Philemon reached out a mental hand, "So?" He said, irritatingly melodious voice grating me with its implication. I could feel his slimy grin, his silk gloves, the way he stared with unbothered amusement at anything I mustered.
But even despite it all, I could only think of SEES. We existed to defeat Nyx.
I haven't agreed to anything.
Philemon laughed.
A/N Hallo and welcome to Stars, my long ass project :) I've been working on it for a while. Currently only Anxiety is finished, and Benedictions is just getting started, but I'll be uploading chapters every Friday and Monday until Anxiety is done. After that will be more sporadic.
As for the chapter itself, I am aware that Philemon is depicted as benevolent in P1/2/other 2 but eat bees I do what I want.
