FOREWORD

So, here is the first of my annual Halloween oneshots. I have some doozies of ideas lined up. But this was the first cab off the rank.

I was ecstatic to learn that the Tsukihime remake was gaining an official English release. Admittedly, I am not used to visual novels, so I'm actually not that far into it. But I'm far enough that I can do a oneshot, as a sort of pilot episode for a potential future crossover that is lengthier. True, there's no guarantees that I will do this or any other Tsukihime crossover as a longer fic, but hey. Honestly, there's not enough crossovers between the Potterverse and Tsukihime.

Anyway, time for the usual disclaimers. First, there will be spoilers, as well as horrific violence. In addition, there's some pretty dark themes. I mean, it IS the Nasuverse, after all.

Finally, the following is a fan-based work. Tsukihime and Harry Potter are the properties of their respective owners. Please support the official release. Otherwise, Arc will pester you into doing so...

OF FUNNY VAMPS AND REINCARNATED WIZARDS

In a blood-soaked apartment in a town in Japan, a teenager sobbed himself to sleep, holding the bloodstained remnants of a woman's body. A body that had been sliced into half a dozen pieces. The teenager was cradling the head in particular, the head of a strikingly beautiful young woman, with a short mop of golden hair, and crimson eyes with slitted pupils, now staring lifelessly.

Except nothing was as it seemed. The teenager was the perpetrator, even if an unwilling one. The woman was not human, and far from dead, though she was immensely inconvenienced for the time being. Yet her anger at her state was mollified by the teenager's remorseful sobs, so while she was going to demand recompense, it wasn't going to be with his life or with pain. Inflicted by her, anyway.

Yet this tableau was just the middle of this little story…


"No."

"…What did you say, brother? I'm not sure I heard you."

"I said no, you uptight, control-freak bitch."

"How dare you?! I…"

"Silencio." A moment of silence, filled by a sigh. "Sorry about doing that to your employer, Miss Hisui and Miss Kouhaku, but she won't let me get in a word edgewise."

"…You can use magecraft too, Master Tohno?"

"…A unique one, yes, and please don't call me that. Unlike this bitch, you haven't lost first-name privileges with me. Now, you listen to me, my so-called sister. You didn't even bother contacting me until now, in all this time since I was sent away by your father to live with the Arimas. I do not give a flying fuck about what your father told you to do or not. And yes, I know I was adopted. Your father and the Tohno family murdered my entire fucking clan, and only adopted me out of pity. I was able to look into his mind when I was in the hospital. You know, the one I was in after my namesake went berserk? Oh, your eyes are so expressive. I saw enough to know that the Tohnos disgust me. I had thought you were better, but the moment I came here, you started ordering me around like I was a pet dog, at best."

"Umm, but Master Tohno, she had to assume the head of the household, and perform all her duties. It's a burden, and…"

"Kouhaku, I say this with all due respect to you, as you and your sister seem like nice people. But look out the window. See all of those fucks out there? I give them all to you three."

"…Vulgarity aside, I see nothing out there."

"That's because I have no fucks left to give. I was only called back when it was convenient. My so-called sister could have found another way, or at least treated me with common decency and respect. She had a choice between what was right, and what was easy. And guess what? She chose what was easy. Because it was easy to act like the head of not only a traditional Japanese household, demanding deference and respect when it needs to be earned, but a fucking Magus household, where even the family members can become guinea pigs, or are just murdered if they're too inconvenient. If she actually loved me as a person, she would treat me like a person, not like a disobedient mutt! Well, I'm done. I'm breaking off ties with her as of now."

"…But your school fees were being paid from by the Tohno family."

"Believe it or not, I got good at investments and playing the stock market. In fact, I'd already bought an apartment as my own place. In fact, I'll be taking my stuff and moving there this evening."

"…Do you really hate her that much?"

"I do now that she's shown her true colours. Oh, don't worry, sister, I'm not letting anything slip about the Moonlit World. But unless it's for an absolute emergency, a matter of life and death, don't even think about contacting me ever again. As far as I am concerned, the Tohno family should have been wiped out that night. The nearest thing I have to a mother is Aoko Aozaki, and I'd rather live with her than any other Magus. And you two? Make sure she becomes better than her father. Because from where I'm standing, I'm seeing him right there…"


He let his anger get the better of him, he would admit. But after what that snooty, self-righteous cow tried to do, controlling every aspect of his life and acting like she expected to be thanked for it…well, he'd had enough of being controlled before. He at least left on decent enough terms with those twin maids. They at least seemed to care, for him and their charge. Which was weird, given that he was sure they were both teenagers.

But he didn't realise that his decision to move into this apartment complex would lead to a complication all of its own. He'd just come back from school, and was just about to open the door, when she appeared. A young woman, seemingly about his physical age or a little older, dressed in a white jumper and a short, black skirt. Yet he knew almost instantly that she wasn't human, even before he saw those slit-like pupils, like a reptile, or a cat's.

Yet that was nothing compared to the instinct he felt. It was like a voice, a thought driving him mad, triggered by the presence of the girl. It was as if he was in no more control over his body.

K1ll k1ll k1ll K1LL! K1ll k1ll K1LL! K1ll k1ll K1LL! K1ll k1ll K1LL!

He was taking off his glasses, even as the demon in the shape of a human girl was opening the door to her apartment. The lines that had haunted him ever since his namesake stepbrother attacked appeared. He took a knife from his pocket. Yet she had done nothing to him. Maybe she hadn't done anything to anyone, despite her inhuman nature.

So, he struggled. He groaned. And even as the young woman turned to look at him, with all his last remaining willpower, he gasped out a single word.

"Run!"

But it was too late for both of them.

By the time he regained himself, they were in her apartment, the inhuman young woman sprawled in half a dozen pieces on the ground, soaking in a pool of her own blood. It was a waking nightmare, but he knew it was all too real. He'd murdered someone, or at least his instincts, the demon-hunting instincts of his clan, had done so. He'd dismembered someone he'd only just met, something completely anathema to him.

He'd sagged to his knees, not caring about the blood soaking his trousers. He took the girl's head, looking into her slackened regal features, and then pressed it to his chest, apologising over and over again. But eventually, exhaustion caught up with him, and he passed out.

He wasn't expecting to be gently shaken awake. Or a rather girly, lilting voice to say, "Oi, are you okay? C'mon, wake up!"

His eyes fluttered open, to be met with the rather energetic expression on the young woman he had just dismembered. Only the somewhat benign expression on her face prevented him from screaming in fright and surprise, and it was a near thing anyway. True, he had sort of realised she wasn't human, but to regenerate from what he did to her, with the Mystic Eyes of Death Perception…

"Hey, good evening, sleepyhead," the girl said, sitting down on the armrest of the sofa she had clearly dragged him over to.

"…Oh, thank goodness, you're alive," he said quietly. "Did I…did I imagine that? Did you manage to stop me?"

"Nope," the young woman said with a surprisingly cheerful tone. "You chopped me into pieces. I have to say, I'm a bit miffed at that, though I could tell you weren't in control of your own actions. You tried to get me to run, and you apologised to me while holding my head. It was kind of sweet, really, but I did sort of die. I was just able to regenerate. Took quite a bit of my power to do so, which was annoying, but I managed it."

She was actually pouting at that. Pouting, as if dismembering her was an annoying inconvenience rather than a serious thing. He wasn't sure what to make of that.

"Sorry," he said, sitting up on the couch, then noticing the blood still on his clothes. "Scourgify," he intoned a few times, cleaning himself up.

"Ooh, that's interesting magic."

"You don't know the half of it. Anyway, about what happened before…I'm…from the Nanaya clan. The last survivor of it, actually. I learned from that man who adopted me that we have an instinctive murderous instinct towards non-humans. Nanayas were Demon Hunters. Though…if you're not torturing and killing me, I'm guessing you don't want revenge?"

The young woman shuffled over until she was sitting right next to him. Oddly enough, he didn't feel uncomfortable with her proximity. "Nanaya, huh? I didn't think there were humans capable of such things. And then there's your eyes. Aside from your Mystic Eyes, there's something about them, too old for a boy your age, from what I know about humans."

So, she discerned something? He sighed. Might as well be honest with the woman he killed. "It's…complicated. I'm a reincarnation. I dunno how it happened, but I died, after being betrayed as an adult, not long after a war I fought, a war between wizards, different to the Magi of this world. My name in this world is Shiki Tohno…well, Shiki Nanaya, if we're going by my birthname. But my name in my past life was Harry Potter."

"Oh? A reincarnation? Hmm, that explains the magic. Gaia doesn't seem to object to that magic you used as much. Oh, actually, while we're doing introductions, allow me to introduce myself. I am Arcueid Bru…sorry, just Arcueid."

At this, though, Shiki…no, Harry Potter's blood ran cold. Although Aoko Aozaki had only tutored him personally for a scant few days, she had, at his request, stayed in correspondence with him, by mail and by phone. He had intrigued her with his odd magic and claims of reincarnation, and so told him a little about the Moonlit World and its most infamous figures.

The young woman sitting next to him was Arcueid Brunestud, the White Princess of the True Ancestors, a centuries-old super-vampire notorious as a hunter of the more corrupt members of her kind. A being who was said to be a potential candidate for the Ultimate One of the planet Earth itself. Not only had he the bad luck to buy an apartment practically next door to her, but he'd temporarily killed her in a berserk frenzy thanks to his Nanaya genes.

"…You're Arcueid Brunestud? THE Arcueid Brunestud?" he asked in sheer disbelief.

"Well, yeah."

He looked her up and down, before saying, "Okay, you're not what I had in mind when I think of the White Princess of the True Ancestors. I mean, you seem too nice."

"Well, as long as you're not my enemy, I can be nice," she said. Her expression became solemn. "And you're not my enemy. Like I said, not only did you try to warn me, but when you dismembered me, you cried for me, apologised to me. You stayed with my body, even though that could have gotten you arrested. Oh, don't get me wrong, you owe me, Harry or Shiki or whatever you prefer to be called. You owe me big time for what you did. But that just means you're going to help me. You see, there's at least a couple of Dead Apostle Ancestors causing trouble in this city."

"The killings we heard about at school," Harry said in realisation. "Dead Apostle Ancestors…vampires, they're causing them?"

"Yep! So, here's the deal. Your Mystic Eyes can help me. I survived because I'm a True Ancestor, I could pretty much remake my body from scratch with help from Gaia, even if it took a lot out of me. But a Dead Apostle? I think they'd die for good. Especially the worst of them…" At this, a scowl touched her lips, her fist clenched. "Roa…the Serpent of Akasha. My nemesis."

"So you want me to help you fight extremely dangerous vampires?"

"Yep!"

Harry sighed in resignation. Magical Britain used him, used him up, and when he tried to slip the leash, they denounced him and had him chucked through the Veil. Yet Arcueid wasn't them, he hoped. Ironic, considering a centuries-old vampire would be more affable than almost the entirety of Magical Britain. True, she was effectively conscripting him, but…he had his saving people thing, even in this life. If he could help Arcueid in any way, then maybe he could.

His life in this life was harder in some ways. His anaemia or whatever that problem he had caused trouble at times, and to learn his family was wiped out and he was adopted by said family's murderers…it was all he could do not to cast a Killing Curse right into Makihisa Tohno's face the moment he showed up in hospital after SHIKI Tohno's rampage, and Harry used Legilimency on him. And Akiha seemed set to follow in her father's footsteps. Hopefully, his calling her out on her bullshit might mitigate that, or better, get her to re-examine her life, treat family like family, not like fucking vassals and pets. She should thank her lucky stars he didn't use Legilimency on her.

"…Fuck it, why not?"

"Yay!" Arcueid said, hugging him to her. It was a testament to her control even in her excited state that he wasn't turned into a meaty pulp, he reckoned. "This is the start of a beautiful friendship!"

Friendship, huh? Here he was, a world and a lifetime away from the few friends he had left before Magical Britain stabbed him in the back. True, he made a few new ones, but he felt set apart from most of them, being an adult in a teenager's body. The closest friend he had, ironically, was by correspondence, Aoko Aozaki.

And yet, here was the White Princess of the True Ancestors saying they were going to be friends. A woman he had just dismembered, only for her to resurrect herself. Okay, it was an idiom, what she said, and yet, he felt like she meant every word.

He chuckled ruefully. Well, looks like he was stuck with her now. But maybe it wouldn't be so bad after all…

THE END?

ANNOTATIONS:

So, Harry has been reincarnated as Shiki Tohno, and after giving that bitch Akiha a well-deserved chewing-out, he's become neighbours with Arc! Fun times ahead!

Now, before we get onto anything else, a rant about Akiha Tohno. She is a bitch, pure and simple, in the remake at least. In the manga (the only other version of the story I have had any dealing with, albeit only with the first two volumes), not so much, she seems okay there. But in the remake, she is an obnoxious, cold-hearted control freak who does stuff that is genuinely controlling and psychologically abusive.

Now, I know you Akiha stans will be berating me for this, saying, "Oh, she had to take the reins of her family at a young age, fending off other family members, has to act like a noble muckity-muck with responsibilities in a traditional Japanese household, and a Magus one to boot, blah blah blah". Newsflash: I do not give a flying fuck about that. She gaslights Shiki, forces him to give up his mobile phone, forces him to leave the family who treated him with love and respect, the Arimas, and for what? She shows virtually no sign of sincere love or affection, just a cold controlling one, like one would give a pet AT BEST. Shiki only puts up with it because he's a fucking doormat who doesn't know any better than deference and obedience (making Shirou Emiya look extroverted by comparison), and while I like Hisui and Kouhaku, I am very bloody disappointed with the latter (who suffered rape from Akiha's father if her backstory is the same as the original) for going along with Akiha's gaslighting.

As far as I am concerned, Akiha should have died to SHIKI's rampage, along with the entire Tohno family, given what she became. How the fuck she was a love interest in the original version of the VN, I have literally no idea. I can understand Arc or Ciel, they're interesting and endearing characters. But Akiha comes across as Rin Tohsaka, only with no redeeming features whatsoever. Ironic, considering that Akiha could be debatably the prototype for Rin's character.

Okay, so, the well-deserved bashing of Akiha Tohno is over. Time for the rest of my notes.

Admittedly, I am only up to the part of the VN where Arc brings Shiki to her new penthouse suite. But between that and her appearance as Archetype: Earth in Fate/Grand Order, I do see why Arc is endearing. True, she needed to be sliced up to gain that personality in the canon game, but I hope I emulated her charm in this story.

I actually liked the version of Shiki 'killing' Arc in the remake, where, instead of butchering Arc in a park, where someone could have seen him, Shiki kills her in her own apartment. That way, he was less likely to be seen doing so, and her body would have remained hidden until she regenerated. It makes better sense.

The way I portrayed the Nanaya demon-killing urge was meant to emulate one of my favourite Doctor Who stories (sadly, mostly missing from the archives, even if the second episode, audio of all episodes, and an animated reconstruction exists), The Evil of the Daleks. A rather nasty character called Maxtible is brainwashed into becoming a Dalek psychologically, and in the final episode, while attacking people, he chants, "Kill kill kill!" while a Dalek voice screams inside his head, "KILL! KILL! KILL!"

As for Harry-Shiki, I wanted to have some divergence. After SHIKI's rampage, Harry's memories, personality, and abilities awoke within Shiki Tohno. He used Legilimency on Makihisa Tohno, and is disgusted, and only his injuries and his need to keep his cover prevent him from taking revenge. If Makihisa had begun raping Kouhaku at that point, Harry would have killed him anyway.

During his tutelage under Aoko, Harry decided to reveal things to Aoko, who took some time to believe him, but afterwards, their bond was stronger. Harry didn't actually demonstrate the Mystic Eyes of Death Perception to her lightly, though. And unlike the VN, Harry-Shiki and Aoko stayed in touch, discreetly. Ironically, she sent him contacts for her sister, and despite Touko and Aoko being bitter enemies, Touko is more friendly with Harry.

Harry-Shiki, meanwhile, began using his allowance to invest in both term deposits and certain shares. He had a rather substantial nest egg squirrelled away by the time Akiha ordered his return. Which allowed me to justify him getting away from that bitch (though he'll remain on good terms with Kouhaku and Hisui), and living in close proximity to Arc.

And because he tried to warn her, stayed with her body out of guilt, and apologised, well, Arc's a little more well-disposed towards him. It helps that, as he cut her into less pieces, she's less weakened than before. She's also intrigued by his claims of being a reincarnation. Of course, any actual romance is a little while off, and I'm not far enough into the VN to portray it yet.

Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this. No guarantees it will become a full fic, but hey.

No numbered annotations this time.