73) You Tell Me That You're Sorry
Warning: Disciplinary spanking
She could tell that Riddick was upset. Actually… upset was a pretty mild word compared to the expression on that unconventionally handsome face. She hadn't seen an expression like that since he'd walked alongside Johns and turned to look back at the little group of survivors. When Johns had been plotting to have Riddick kill Jack.
This wasn't quite the same…though there were elements of similarity. Rage. A twist of his lips that reminded her of disgust, with himself or something else, she couldn't tell. His eyes had fallen on River, and he'd seemed…anguished… Riddick looked half like he wanted to kill someone and half like he felt guilty of something. But he hadn't done anything wrong, not that she'd seen. And if he had River would be angry with him, wouldn't she? But she wasn't.
Zài dì yù de dì qī gè guā yuē jī zhōng shì shén me was going on? When he told her that Mal wanted her in the galley it was hardly a surprise. Whatever had put that look on Riddick's face couldn't be anything good.
She glanced back at the bridge from the bottom of the steps when she heard a hard thump and a vibrating echo like metal had been struck. Turned back for a moment when she heard Riddick's low pained voice and saw River reach out to him, saw Riddick kneel in front of River like a supplicant, his face against her stomach while those white hands stroked over the tawny skin of his scalp.
Carolyn nearly groaned as she continued walking towards the galley. This was going to be bad. Really bad. Wǒ de tiān ā what happened?
At the entrance to the galley she paused, trying to figure out exactly what was going on and not having much luck unfortunately. The table held a small hill of belongings Carolyn recognized as River's. Jack stood at the table, glaring at the things while Mal leaned against the cabinets across from the girl, kitty corner to the doorway where Carolyn stood. Mal wore a glare of his own which Carolyn could admit was pretty damn intimidating.
"Mal," Despite the intimacy of their relationship in private, she did her best to at least appear professional/respectful in front of the rest of the crew. And she knew him well enough by now to know he was absolutely furious even if he wasn't showing it. She hadn't seen him like this since they'd had to leave Zoë at the hospital ship. "You wanted to see me?"
"Yeah," Mal rubbed the back of his neck and sighed like he was trying to expel rotten air from his lungs. "Dunno if you're aware…River's been havin' a bit of an issue with her things being…misplaced."
Carolyn nodded cautiously, "Rick mentioned something about it. I saw him carrying River's toe shoes, and another time her hairbrush." She considered the question and the implications, "I take it River hasn't simply been… forgetting where she's left her things."
"Apparently not," The Captain shook his head, his eyes tight at the corners, jaw set. "An' Rick, now that everything's sort of settled down… put his mind to figuring out what was going on." He nodded at Jack, a bit jerkily, "Saw Jack here, sneak into River's room, pull this stuff out and leave it, hidden, all over the ship."
Carolyn now completely understood the expression on Riddick's face. Of course, he was furious. Biting back her first reaction of what the hell was the girl thinking and asking how gorram stupid could she be, took more than one deep breath before she shook her head, "Jī dū zài tā mā de shí zì jià shàng Jack."
"Rick… Way his hand was clenching…like he craved the feel of something in his palm, he wanted to gut her. Like in between one breath and the next he'd've used one of those shivs he's got," Mal bit off the words, control of his voice clearly taking an effort. "One wrong word, he'd've carved out her liver." The Captain shook his head. "Had her held to wall support with his fist and forearm 'cross her collarbone. Got no doubt if she'd pushed him he'd've snapped her neck without a bit of regret, leastways he wouldn't've regretted it right then, maybe later. But I…ain't ever seen him that angry." Those dark blue eyes were hard with pain and anger and a certain sympathy for how Riddick felt.
Carolyn nodded slowly, let Mal see she understood. River was as close to a daughter as Mal had and he worried over her like a father would. To see Riddick holding Jack like that, to read the look on the huge man's face and know just how he felt… She could see that Mal felt something similar. Maybe not as hot and furious as Riddick, but enough to understand why the man had been ready to gut the girl he called his little sister. She glanced at Jack, who for some reason took that as a prompt to defend herself.
"He's just—" Jack began in a somehow sullen and defensive tone and subsided at the look Mal gave her. Anger. Sorrow. Disappointment.
"Jack, wǒ de tiān ā, bì zuǐ," Carolyn had the urge to tear out her hair. For that she got a fulminating glare. Amazing what Jack had picked up from Riddick, that ability to speak without words, just one sardonic, furious or patient look conveying a paragraph worth of description. "What the hell? Why?"
"Like to hear that myself," The harsh scrape of the chair legs across the floor loud in the quiet galley. "Jack. Sit. Now." No mistaking that for anything but an order, words bitten off like Mal hated the taste of them, and Jack sat albeit sulkily. Mal pulled out a chair for her opposite Jack and took his seat at the head of the table. "This has been goin' on a long gorram time." He glanced at Carolyn, "I think ya'll'd been on the boat maybe about two and half to three months when River's belongings began to get 'misplaced'."
"I'm still stuck on the why of it," Carolyn shook her head, trying to keep her calm intact as she spoke slowly. "What's the point of it? Spite? Being nasty to River won't make Rick look at you differently."
"He thinks she's so perfect," Jack nearly spat the words at them. "Ever since we got here it's like he doesn't even see me. Flirting with her, watching her all the time. She's got him doing all these stupid dances with her… She's changing him into something he isn't."
"Jack, Rick started changing when he didn't turn his back and leave us for dead," Carolyn kept her tone even. She could recall arguing/fighting with adults back when she was Jack's age. Making an 'adult' lose control, shout back, became a victory of sorts, proving adults weren't any better than teenagers. "Life changes everybody Jack."
"Adapt or die," Mal agreed quietly, his jaw still tight. "Rick adapts."
"Why ain't you pissed at him," Jack threw a glare at Carolyn. As if the older woman's lack of anger and jealousy over her former lover was some type of betrayal. "You two were fucking regular and he just dumped you for her."
"What I do, or don't do. Who I do or don't do it with. That's none of your business," Carolyn refused to let Jack's tone (or phrasing) get under her skin. Although damn it wasn't easy, the girl had a gift for provoking a reaction. "Yes, Rick and I are friends, and that included sex. When we both wanted it. Sometimes one or the other of us didn't and that was fine too." Jack snorted derisively at that, and Carolyn raised an eyebrow, "You don't think that sometimes men aren't in the mood?"
The roll of Jack's eyes was answer enough and Carolyn sighed, irritation coloring her tone, "Jack, I guarantee you there are times men don't want sex, even to someone as…" She hesitated, feeling around for a word, "masculine as Rick. For instance," She put a little pointed snap in her tone, "after you woke him up from a sound sleep by trying to give him a blowjob." Jack flushed uncomfortably and Carolyn nodded, "Kinda obvious he was pissed, not pleased."
"But that's beside the point," Mal interjected. "What we're discussin' at the moment is what you did and why." He waited a moment and when no explanation was forthcoming, didn't quite sigh but his tone hardened with anger for all that Carolyn could tell he was trying to stay calm, "Jack, this ain't acceptable. I don't care how you feel about Rick bein' with River, you don't have the right to torment someone like that."
"Torment," Jack nearly snorted again. "So, she had to look for her stuff before she used it, so what? I didn't wreck anything or throw it away."
"And the changing temps on the stove top and oven," The Captain stared at her pointedly and she shrugged petulantly. "That caused quite a mess a few times. And could've resulted in something inedible. That'd be a waste of food; which is something we don't have a lot of." Jack's sullen shrug conveyed her discomfort over a possible result she clearly hadn't anticipated. "I take it from your lack of concern you didn't understand what Rick meant when he said you were 'gas-lighting' River."
Carolyn looked at Mal for a moment, startled and he nodded grimly. She hadn't heard that term in a long time. And she wouldn't have expected Riddick to know it either. "That's…not something to be taken lightly," The blonde commented in what she hoped was a neutral tone. No wonder Riddick had been so pissed. No wonder Mal was so angry for all that he was pretty good at hiding it behind that clipped even tone.
"Even if you don't know what it means, you knew," He repeated pointedly, "Knew, that you were doing wrong," Mal stared at Jack. "If I take your meanin', it's due to Rick likin' and wanting River, and you not liking her because of that." He paused meaningfully, hard blue eyes boring into Jack, daring her to lie, "Or do I misunderstand?"
"You all treat her like she's an adult. And you treat me like a kid," Jack seemed on the verge of explosion, fists clenched, bringing her hands down hard on the table. "I'm sick an' tired of it. Like I'm a baby or somethin'. I was on my own for more than a year before I got on the Hunter Gratzner. I can take care of myself." She glared at Carolyn, "When we were on the Mirabelle and the skiff, you an' Rid-Rick treated me like an adult. Like I was useful. I worked, same as you. But we get to Serenity and all of the sudden I'm a kid again and nothing I say or do matters." Her mouth set in a scowl, "And you always take Rid-Rick's side."
Carolyn groaned, "Jack, I am trying to not take sides." Privately she thought that Jack really needed to remember that there was one person on the boat (Bea) who didn't know 'Rick' was actually Riddick (at least they'd all been careful about his name and Carolyn fervently hoped that was the case) and if Jack didn't watch herself, she'd end up giving him away. And that wouldn't exactly put her on Riddick's good side. "Yes, it seemed like we treated you more like an adult before we came to Serenity. There's a lot of stuff we did out of necessity that we wouldn't have if there was another choice."
Mal glanced at her and Carolyn elaborated as briefly as she could, "Rick would never have told her about Johns and what he wanted to do. He'd never have had her running through the dark, bleeding. Or doing first aid on me in the skiff. We all had to work on the ship that picked us up, to earn our way, they didn't care how young she was." The pilot shrugged, "In order to survive the crash and everything afterwards we had to work together. If Jack was capable of doing something she was set to the task while the rest of us worked on what we could."
"Seems to me," Mal's frown hadn't abated though his jaw relaxed slightly. "That you and I had a talk Jack, about acting like a grown-up a while back. About what being a grown-up means." He glanced at Carolyn a moment before looking at Jack again. "How if you want to be treated as if you're grown you take responsibility for your actions. You think about other people and how they'll be affected by what you do or have done." He tapped the table pointedly, "And we were sitting right about here at the time. Now do you recall that conversation?"
Carolyn wondered exactly what that talk had encompassed as Jack began to turn bright red, mumbling, "Yes sir."
"Now do you think that you've acted in a way that warrants being treated like you're all grown?" Mal continued sternly. "Considering you've gone out of your way to make someone feel uncomfortable just because you don't like that her beau is looking at her instead of you?" Jack shook her head and Mal nodded, "No. Because a grown-up doesn't steal and lie and sabotage their rival."
"You all think she's perfect, and so does he," Jack burst out miserably.
"As a matter of fact, no one on this boat thinks River is perfect," The Captain's mouth quirked up at one corner in a rueful and humorless half smile, more like a grimace. "We got more'n adequate proof that she ain't. We saw River at her worst. She needed more help than you ever have Jack. Got badly hurt and was sick for a long time after, more'n a year."
Carolyn nodded, that made sense given what she'd observed of River's behavior and her need for routine. A genius brain wasn't always the blessing most might think it was. Mal eyed the girl gravely, "That's part of what makes what you did even more cruel Jack." He tapped the table again, "You don't even know River. Don't know what hiding her things and messing with the stove would do to her. Seems to me you didn't care either. Just wanted to make her unhappy however you could out of jealousy."
Jack bit her lip but didn't say anything, still flushed with embarrassment and anger it looked like. Carolyn sighed, Buddha being angry just tired her out. Mal too from the look of him, exhausted and disappointed now that the adrenaline of his mad was slowly fading, leaving disappointment and sorrow in its wake, "Jack, when you woke Rick up in the middle of the night that time…" Carolyn took the girl's hand and rubbed her thumb over the slender knuckles, "He told you remember? That you could be thirty years old, ripe and ready and he still wouldn't really see you as an adult? To him you're his little sister."
The Captain kept his eyes on Jack, "And a good thing too, considerin' how angry he is." He sighed quietly, "The man was fighting his baser instincts so he wouldn't kill you Jack. Only reason he even put you down was me promisin' I'd deal with you." Carolyn's head jerked in Mal's direction to stare at him, and he nodded, "If the man didn't have so much self-control it'd have been an even nearer thing than it was. I've seen that kinda look before, even felt that way a time or two myself. Jack you are damn lucky I was comin' to get coffee and could talk him down by promising I'd deal with you."
Carolyn shook her head, "Dà xiàng bào zhà shì de lā dù zi Jack…" She'd half hoped Mal had been exaggerating what he said he'd seen, but apparently that was a forlorn and yúchǔn hé duǎn shì hope.
"Which is why we find ourselves having this uncomfortable little chat," Mal continued as if Carolyn hadn't spoken, just as well since her cursing wasn't really a contribution to the conversation. "You're all about getting that shine job, and guns and knives, and I was just about set, arranging for you to learn what you needed, so I could start to teach you about handlin' guns. Was even gonna press Simon on when you could get your eyes shined safely and those lenses to keep you from blinding yourself in the sun."
Jack bit her lip unhappily, clearly understanding that Mal would now do no such thing and the Captain nodded, "Exactly. I'm not going to push on that. When Simon says it's safe, that's when you can have one. Weapons training, that's a no go too. I already talked with Zoë, and she agreed to teach you hand to hand. That'll start tomorrow at dawn ship time. And you aren't gonna enjoy it because Zoë's pretty much going to take you through the basic training a soldier gets and then some."
Carolyn watched Jack's face, half excited half dreading tomorrow morning. As well she should because from what Carolyn had heard basic training was no picnic.
Mal nodded, "Glad you take my meaning." He'd clearly read the same thing on Jack's face that Carolyn had. "Now the last bit, I guarantee neither of us is gonna be happy with, but I warned you Jack. I told you what would happen, what I'd do if you ever did something like that again." He narrowed his eyes, "And if you try the argument that it isn't assault, that you didn't touch River, only her things… Well…I will take great pains to make you understand that what you did to her is just as bad as what you did to him. In some ways it's worse."
Jack tensed and the Captain's face hardened, "Jack, don't make this any harder than it is." He warned her flatly, "Running won't stop what's about to happen. All you'll do is make me mad." Carolyn considered her lover's face mentally confirming her earlier thought that the fury she'd seen when she came into the galley had faded enough (with that loss of adrenaline or just forcing himself to be calm through the conversation) that he could speak with something of his usual rhythm and phrasing.
"You're not mad now," Put that way Jack's incredulous tone made sense.
"I am vastly annoyed, pretty gorram close to shēng mènqi," Mal nodded. "But worse, I'm tiān shā de disappointed in you Jack. I thought better of you. Like I said, ain't either one of us gonna be happy with this, but I told you what the consequences were and that means we both gotta live up to 'em." He pointed at the door, "Now you go down to your dorm and I'll be along in a minute. Ain't gonna do this where anyone could walk in. It ain't anyone's business but ours."
Jack stood and walked out of the galley, spine stiff, and Carolyn looked at Mal. When Jack was out of earshot the pilot raised her eyebrows inquiringly and Mal sighed, "I promised her that if she ever did anything like that again I'd tan her hide the way my mama did mine when I was a young 'un. Last time my ma did that I was goin' on fourteen. I ain't gonna make Jack go and cut a switch off the bushes to tan her with, mostly 'cause we don't have any bushes and also because I figure by the time my palm is stinging, she'll have learned her lesson."
Carolyn sighed and nodded, "You need me there?" She looked up as Zoë came into the galley from the shuttle she and Emma were still using as their bunk.
"Emma's sleepin'," The First Mate explained quietly. "Figured I'd make a start on dinner." She regarded the two of them with knowing eyes, "I take it from the furious voices close to yelling earlier that Jack did something Rick found…distasteful?"
Carolyn nodded at River's things on the table, "Jack's been…messing with River."
Zoë sighed, "No wonder Rick was so angry he was almost shouting."
"Told Jack you're going to be training her starting tomorrow," Mal stood.
"Best tell Simon he should stay with Kaylee tonight then," Zoë smirked. "I'm gonna get her out of bed the same way my drill sergeant did me."
"That's your choice," Mal nodded at Carolyn in answer to the question she'd asked before the First Mate came into the galley. "I expect Jack'll either want comfort and company or she'll want to be left alone, best be prepared either way."
Carolyn nodded and followed him down to the passenger dorms. Bea looked up from the book she was reading on the lounge sofa but didn't comment. A quick stop in the infirmary to borrow Simon's encyclopedia and Carolyn leaned against the ladder to Jack's bunk.
Carolyn was willing to bet that Jack would think long and hard before she did something like that again. Mal had paddled her pì gu until Jack could barely sit down and he had a hard time handling chopsticks at dinner. Afterwards though, he'd gotten Jack a cool washcloth for her flushed unhappy face and kissed her head, "Jackie girl, I hate like hell this was necessary. So do us both a favor and don't put us both in this position again?"
She'd nodded mutely and Mal had patted her shoulder gently, "All right. Supper's in a couple hours. You get some rest until then, think things over all right?"
"Yes sir," Jack nodded again and Mal left the room, wincing as he moved his shoulder and arm to climb down the ladder to her dorm
"Jack, you want company," Carolyn asked from the ladder after Mal had gone.
"No thanks," Misery but it was misery without the sulks and attitude of earlier. "I'm just gonna do what Mal said and rest."
"I understand," Carolyn climbed up a bit more, far enough to put the encyclopedia on Jack's bunk. "I got a few things queued up for you to read. Some things you should understand. All right mèi mei?"
"Okay," Jack took the encyclopedia and Carolyn slid the door shut before climbing back down the ladder.
Mal looked at her from his position against the wall of Carolyn's dorm and she smiled slightly, "Figured she ought to know what gas-lighting is. And that on most worlds it's considered a crime, like assault." She explained in a quiet voice as they walked towards the stairs. A sigh escaped her, and she shook her head, "Almost enough to put me off having kids completely." She admitted.
"Almost but not quite," Mal's left hand (which didn't have a slightly swollen palm and wasn't attached to a sore arm and shoulder) squeezed Carolyn's pì gu.
"Think you could stand to have company tonight," Carolyn grinned at him. "You know, just to avoid whatever it is Zoë'll be waking Jack up with?"
"I might could stand that," Mal gave her a smile, those blue eyes gleaming and Carolyn couldn't help her grin widening.
Author's Note: Well…we can't say that Mal didn't warn Jack about the consequences. Now what the rest of the fall out will be... well, I'll leave that to your imagination until next week.
Chinese Translations:
Zài dì yù de dì qī gè guā yuē jī zhōng shì shén me (What in the seventh sphincter of hell)
Wǒ de tiān ā (Dear god in heaven / Oh, my God)
Jī dū zài tā mā de shí zì jià shàng (Christ on the fucking cross)
bì zuǐ (Shut up!)
Dà xiàng bào zhà shì de lā dù zi (To have the explosive-type diarrhea of an elephant)
yúchǔn hé duǎn shì (foolish/stupid and short sighted)
shēng mènqi (to seethe / to sulk / to be pissed off (vulgar))
tiān shā de (Goddam! / goddamn / wretched)
pì gu (butt)
mèi mei (little sister)
