A/N; So this is a new chapter. I figured it was time to give some insight into Phade's childhood and past.


Epilogue

Pase la noche disfrutando the distraction Ryan provided. This was after I'd left Aurelío asleep in his own bedroom. We'd have to update it… he wasn't a little boy anymore, I had a pre-teen in the house to get to know and figure out how this next phase of our lives was going to work.

It had always been the two of us. Para mi, haci fue… Dante wasn't that involved until I left him and took Lío.

The night I moved in with him… Its up there with the sunny day in LA I'd been shopping with Tia Luci for my communion dress… It hadn't ended well. Tampoco la noche que murio mi Mamá. The worst days of my life so far…

Franco, standing just behind her, barked angrily, "Llevatela, Dante! Es tulla, no? Ya la premiaste, ahora carga con ella."

I closed my eyes but the memory only got louder. I was at my Dad's house, my sister telling my Dad I'd been sneaking out to meet with Dante…

"Aqui la tienes, maldito!" Franco growled, his voice cold and full of disgust. "Llevatela!"

Phade's heart pounded in her chest as they stumbled out the door.

"Que te larges!" he bellowed, his voice thunderous. "Crees que me vas a seguir haciendo pendjo? Revolcandote con uno y otro como si fueras una-? Largate con el!"

Family was supposed to be there for you… isn't that what everyone says? I mean, even the Winchesters-. Dean has that order on repeat in his head. His Dad's voice telling him to take his brother and watch out for him… Cuantos años lleva cargando con eso?

My Dad… he gave me up just like that. He cared about el qué diran…

Franco's face was stone cold now. "Tu madre… como se avergonzaria de ti, de lo que nos has hecho."

"Que hize?" Phade demanded. "Digame que hize?!"

"Revolcarte con ese… con el Dean," Franco continued, his voice turning icy. "Y que ganaste, eh? Por que te dejo tirada despues de que consiguio lo que queria de ti."

Franco's expression hardened, any trace of sympathy disappearing from his face. "Ese cabron, te dijo babosadas y tu de pendeja le diste lo mas importante que tenias!" Franco yelled. "Has dejado en verguenza nuestra familia, mi nombre!"

He's the only parent I have left… I haven't asked him to apologize for-. Its not how its done with us. Not in this family, not in our culture. Even if the parent is wrong, they're right and you just… move past it however you can. So… even though my Dad still hasn't admitted that maybe I did see the YE man… that maybe those 'stories' weren't just my imagination… Dad tried, he left to care for Aurelío while he was stuck with Dante. He's been here at the Hyperion and with Ryan and his Hunters. I know he sees everything I've done and what I'm doing… Pero ya acepte que nunca se va disculpar. That's not how he's made.

That's why I can't be like that.

Aurelío is all that should matter to me. He's the one I should be focused on, pero… I still can't let go of this other side of me.

Helping…

I'm not that girl anymore. The one so paralyzed by fear… she couldn't lift a finger to help either of them. And I'm not the girl from Indiana either…at least, I thought all of that was behind me. Although, I'd never tell anyone this, but… well, I've tried to convince myself it was just a fluke. In Monte Rio… that flutter in my chest when Dean… Mejor lo dejo ahi.

What the point? I'm not even… human? What I've become… I don't know how to give it back. How that would even work, pero tampoco se si eso es lo que quiero…

Go back to being… nomal.

ats