Telling Shiho Miyano that he loved her was probably one of the most challenging things that Shinichi Kudo has ever done.

He never really had this same problem when he was in love with Ran. Perhaps that was because he knew that the girl felt the same way as he did (which was confirmed by the girl in question when she told him herself that night he became Conan) so it was only a matter of telling her how he felt.

But that had been three years ago. In the year that followed the two of them getting together, he had managed to take down the organization with the help of the FBI, and Shiho was able to create a permanent antidote for the both of them. He had taken it immediately with glee, happy to finally be back in his true form and be with Ran and not having to worry about being on a time limit because of the temporary antidote. He decided to tell her everything (he owed that much to her after lying for so long and making her think she was crazy every time she suspected that Conan was actually Shinichi, only to find different ways to prove her theory wrong). If they were to have an honest relationship with each other, he couldn't keep that big of a secret from her. Predictably, she was furious with him (which Shinichi could hardly blame her for) and was angry about the fact that he clearly didn't trust her enough to let her in on his secret. Shinichi had denied this of course (she was his childhood friend/sweetheart, how could he not trust her?) and said that it was because he wanted to protect her. That had been their first real argument as a couple, and Ran didn't talk to him for a month after that. It had hurt, but Shinichi understood. During that month he spent most of his time with Shiho, who helped him with cases (something that seemed to happen wherever they went. Shiho had begun to call him a corpse magnet, much to his annoyance) and when there wasn't a case to solve, they would spend their time with the kids. It was during this time that Shinichi began to notice just how beautiful Shiho looked in her adult form. He' d only ever seen her true self twice, and neither times were really a good opportunity to really look at her. He also noticed that he had been feeling different towards Shiho as of late, but he pushed the feelings down. It was probably nothing. Besides, he had a girlfriend, and it was inappropriate to think of Shiho that way. Shinichi loved Ran. He really did.

Right?

Right


Eventually, Ran slowly began to forgive him, and they started to go out on dates like they used to. Something felt different from before, however. It didn't have anything to do with what he had told Ran, either. No, it was something entirely different. What that something was, Shinichi had no idea, and he wasn't too keen on finding out.

He had a feeling that he wouldn't like the answer.


Shinichi decided to introduce Ran to his partner, Shiho Miyano. Of course, he didn't say the partner part out loud, lest Ran get any ideas in her head and get mad at him. That was the last thing that he wanted. He saw the look of confusion on Ran's face, trying to figure out who this mystery girl was while at the same time staring at Shiho as if she knew her from somewhere, but couldn't quite put her finger on it. When Shinichi told her that Shiho had been Ai Haibara, that was when a look of recognition crossed Ran's face. For some reason, her demeanor slightly changed, but she smiled at Shiho and shook her hand, reintroducing herself as Ran Mouri.

Shinichi wouldn't know why Ran seemed different around Shiho until much later.


Sometimes Shinichi and Ran would go out on a date, and sometimes he would hang out with Shiho. He even convinced Shiho's to hang out with him and Ran every now and then, hoping that the two girls would be able to get along with each other. They were both very important to him, after all. He wanted the both of them to be in his life.

Shinichi tried not to think about how the thought of Shiho being an important person to him made him feel things that he shouldn't.


Whenever Shiho hung out with him and Ran, Shinichi began to notice something. While the two girls had been able to hit it off, and were nice to each other, Ran seemed a bit withdrawn. Which was odd to Shinichi. Ran was usually a ray of sunshine towards everyone that she met. She never acted as if she didn't want that person to be there, or as if she didn't want to be near that person. And yet, for whatever reason, Shiho seemed to be the exception. At first he assumed that it was because Shiho used to be Ai Haibara, the quiet girl who Ran had a hard time connecting with in comparison to Ayumi, Mitsuhiko, and Genta. Perhaps Ran felt awkward to be around Shiho because of that.

Once again, Shinichi wouldn't find out the actual reason why until much later.


One day on a date with Ran, Shinichi got a call from Agasa, who told him that Shiho had a high fever. He immediately told Ran and rushed to the professor's house, Ran right behind him, who looked just as worried as he was. Once they got there, Shinichi rushed to the girls room and found her lying in bed, breathing rapidly. He ran to her side and grabbed her hand, telling Agasa to get his car ready so that they could take Shiho to the hospital, something that the girl was vehemently against. Ran made herself scarce to go make some beef congee for Shiho, listening to the two of them bicker all the while. When she was done, she noticed that the arguing had stopped. She made her way back to Shiho's bed with the beef congee, only to find a most peculiar scene: Shinichi was still holding Shiho's hand, and was looking at her with a soft smile on his face as the two of them spoke to each other, looking as if they were in another world that nobody else was allowed to enter. Not even Ran.

She couldn't help but think about back when they were Conan and Ai, and how they seemed to be in their own world back then too.

Shinichi didn't notice the sad look on Ran's face, nor did he notice her forced happy mood when she made herself known to them. If he had, he might have been able to prevent what would eventually happen.


The months passed them by and soon it was a new year. A new year into his relationship with Ran. A relationship that was slowly deteriorating before his eyes.

Shinichi began to consider himself a bad boyfriend when he realized that he realized that he didn't really want to try and fix it. Although it's not like Ran was really doing much to fix it either. She had been very distant whenever they would go out on dates. Almost as if she was thinking of something, but didn't know how to say it.

Ran didn't finally say it until a year later.


"How do you feel about Miyano-san?" Ran asked.

Of all the things that she could talk to him about on a date, how he felt about another girl (even though Shiho wasn't just "another girl" to him) was the last thing that he expected.

"How do I feel about Shiho? Why are you asking me that?"

"You know why, don't try and act like you don't. You've realized it too, haven't you? That this….us, isn't really working anymore."

Of course he noticed it. He noticed it for the past year. He just never really made the connection that it had to do with Shiho.

(That was a lie, of course. He knew that it had everything to do with Shiho. But he couldn't do that to Ran. She waited for him for so long. It wouldn't be fair to her if he started having feelings towards someone else. He just never thought that Ran would notice.)

Ran continued, "At first I thought it was because of everything that you had gone through with the organization. I mean, nobody can go through all of that and not come out of it as a completely different person than they were before. Then I began to realize that you really didn't change all that much. So I thought to myself 'if it's not that, then what is it?'. When you introduced me to Miyano-san, I got my answer. It was her. And it makes sense. She was there for you when I couldn't be. She was the only one who understood your situation, something that I can't do no matter how much I want to. Back when the both of you were Conan and Ai, I noticed that you two seemed to be in your own little world whenever you would talk to each other, and nobody else could enter it. I actually thought it was cute and a sign that 'Conan' liked her. That hasn't changed between you two at all. If anything, it's only grown stronger. And I tried to ignore it, but every time she hangs out with us, I notice how you just….naturally gravitate towards her, as if I'm not even there. So I'll ask you again: how do you feel about Miyano-san?"

Shinichi pondered Ran's words before he responded to her question. In truth, he really hadn't noticed that he would gravitate towards Shiho whenever they would hang out together. And why would he? It's what he had done for the last few years. It just came naturally to him.

"I - I don't - it's complicated."

Ran sighed. Looks like she was going to have to go straight for the jugular.

"Ok, since it's so complicated, answer me this question and you may just find the answer to the first one: do you still love me?"

How Ran thought that this question would be easier to answer than the first, Shinichi had no idea. What he did know, however, was that he needed to answer this question. By the look on Ran's face, she wouldn't let him get away until he did. He began to think about their relationship. When they had first gotten together, he had certainly been in love with her. He was over the moon when they had finally become a couple. Once the organization was out of the way and he got his real body back, they could be a couple full time and not have to worry about the temporary antidote wearing off and him having to lie about going back to his really "tough case" that he had been working on. For a long time, he was happy. They were happy. And then, slowly but surely, that happiness began to dwindle. At first, just like Ran, he had assumed it was because of everything he went through. But the more time he spent with Shiho, both with Ran and without Ran, he slowly began to realize that wasn't the case at all. It had nothing to do with the organization.

It had everything to do with the girl who was a former member of the organization. Someone who he thought he could never become friends with, never call her his partner, and….

And never develop romantic feelings for her.

All of those things had happened though. It was time for him to stop denying it. It was time for him to be honest with Ran. With himself.

"I think I still do. But it's not the same love that I felt for you before. Not the same love that you still feel towards me. Something changed, and you're right. It does have a lot to do with Shiho. I…like her. Or I love her. I'm not really sure which one it is yet."

He had expected Ran to slap him, to start crying and say that she hates him, and to run away.

The last thing that he expected was to hear her laughter.

Shinichi looked at her, his face a mixture of shock and confusion. What on earth was so funny?

Seeing the look on his face, Ran stopped laughing and cleared her throat, "You really are dense when it comes to matters of the heart, aren't you?"

Shinichi's eyebrow twitched, "Shut up"

Ran laughed again, "Well, I'm glad that we had this talk. I hope that we can still remain friends?"

What kind of question was that? He couldn't imagine his life without her in it. She had been a huge part of it, after all.

"Of course we can! Just because we're breaking up doesn't mean that our friendship has to end."

The moment the words left his mouth, Shinichi grimaced.

Breaking up

It hadn't occurred to him before, but he supposed that was indeed what they were doing. Breaking up with each other.

He walked over to Ran and hugged her, "I'm sorry. You waited for me all that time and…"

"It's ok, Shinichi. Sometimes these things just…happen, you know? That's how life is."

She tried to put up a strong facade, but he knew better. The tears he felt on his shirt said otherwise.

He held Ran tighter and kissed her one last time.


And that was how Shinichi found himself in his current predicament: trying to come up with a way to tell Shiho how he felt about her. All of his previous attempts had failed. He wanted to smack himself upside the head every time he thought about his last attempt at doing so.

He found Shiho in the professor's living room, reading one of her many magazines. He took a deep breath. Today was the day where he would tell Shiho how he felt about her. Shiho looked up when she noticed him enter.

"Kudo-kun. What are you doing here? "

"Are you ever going to call me by my first name? I call you by your first name all the time."

"Doesn't mean that I have to call you by yours."

Damn this woman.

Shinichi wanted to say something that would inevitably lead to the two of them having one of their infamous verbal sparring matches, but decided not to. He didn't want to ruin the mood.

"I'm here because I have something to tell you."

"And that something is…?"

He took a deep breath. It was now or never.

"I lo-l-l"

Why couldn't he get the damn words out?!

"You what?"

"I-I like the way your hair looks! "

You could hear a pin drop.

Shiho looked at him blankly. Shinichi, on the other hand, wanted to kill himself. Why did he keep on doing this?!

"You came over here to tell me that you like the way my hair looks."

"Y-yep!"

"So that's really all you came here to say?"

He nodded

Shiho sat back down and resumed reading her magazine, mumbling what sounded like "you really are an idiot"

Indeed he was an idiot.


Shinichi groaned. He had to get it right this time. And it's not like she wouldn't believe him, since she knew that he and Ran broke up a few months ago. Shiho had been the first person that he told, unsurprisingly.

Maybe it was because he was afraid that she may not like him back. He had no idea how she felt about him. Unlike Ran, Shiho was an enigma to him. Just when he thought he had her all figured out, she would do something that left him starting at square one again. He looked at the time on his watch.

10:00 p.m.

It was late, but that wasn't going to stop him. Besides, he knew that Shiho wasn't asleep yet. He could see the lights coming from the professor's house. Shinichi stood up from his bed and ran down the steps and out the door. He was going to confess to Shiho tonight, and nothing was going to stop him.

Not even his own stupidity.


Shinichi knocked on the front door and waited, trying to calm his nerves. A few seconds later, the door opened up and Shiho appeared. He smiled at her.

"Hey. Mind if I come in?"

She nodded and stepped aside so that he could come in, and closed the door.

"I know it's late but I want to tell you something. It's important."

"Oh? Well whatever this important something is, hopefully you can tell me without becoming a stuttering mess like the last time you were he-"

"I love you!"

The confession made Shiho look as if she were a deer caught in headlights.

Seeing that he had her attention, Shinichi continued, "I love you. I don't know when it started or how it started but I know how I feel. Maybe I always felt this way about you on a subconscious level and I just didn't realize it at the time because the only girl I could think about was Ran. For the past two years now I started to notice that I have feelings for you, but I tried to keep it down and deny that they were there because I was with Ran, and I didn't want to do that to her after she waited for me for so long. But I can't deny it anymore. It's why I've been such an idiot around you lately. I've been trying to confess to you but every time I just got nervous and said something stupid. If you don't feel the same way about me, that's fine. I just had to tell you how I feel."

That last part was a lie, of course. He really hoped that she felt the same way as he did.

Shiho chuckled. How could he possibly think that she didn't feel the same way towards him? She slowly walked towards Shinichi, who looked like he was scared of her response. Scared that she would reject him. Luckily for him, she was going to put those fears to rest.

She kissed him. A kiss that Shinichi readily returned. After a few seconds, she pulled away from him and smirked.

"You really are a slow witted detective, aren't you?"