There was a term of phrase that he heard passed about in some of the towns they stopped by in their travels:
Fuck around and find out.
Of course, he never thought those words applied to him. He was Naruto 'Freaking' Uzumaki. By his math, there were only a few people even back in Konoha that could put him away proper.
Of course, he'd never been good at math – failed it thrice – but never mind that!
The point stood, there weren't too many people he had to worry about. None at all in the backwater villages and towns that Pervy Sage and he tended to venture about.
And in a sense he was right, yet there was a key aspect that was missing in his logic:
Such a phrase could apply to a lot more than dealings with man and beast.
Not the smallest part of him thought that he should be weary of pushing his luck even when alone.
Even when it came to matters that he felt sure about.
No, even when confident – especially when confident – you should hold some caution in your heart.
So that you don't make the mistake of pushing the limit too far.
Such a truth was to be found the hard way.
He sat on his bed, scrolls sprawled out around him – none the wiser to encroaching disaster. His hands, shirt, left pinkie toe, and more than a bit of the bed itself were all covered in ink as black as the abyss. Jiraiya would freak out something fierce once he saw the extra cleaning fees. Not that the blond knucklehead cared much at all. The irredeemable deviant of a sensei took Gama-chan – his life savings! – and blew it at a brothel. He'd sworn to pay him back with the next royalty check for Icha Icha, but that was a promise given over a year ago. They didn't stay much of anywhere for more than a week. Finding what address that check went to would prove a mission unto itself.
So let it be that the 'adult' foots the bill for once. Besides, it was none other than the sannin that introduced him to the wonderful world of Fūinjutsu. He held no sarcasm in that fact, it was a proper, wondrous art by his count.
He'd never been the brainy type. Fūinjutsu – the most thought-intensive of the jutsu branches – should be more than beyond him. It should be impossible for him, even more so than Genjutsu. Yet something about Fūinjutsu simply clicked. He couldn't explain it, it felt right in a way he never before experienced. When he delved into his studies of those runic techniques, he felt like he was in his element for the first time.
No, more than right – it felt fun. He could and had gotten lost for hours in his studying, his research, and his development of Fūins. He'd reached a stage where he was – on occasion – correcting Jiraiya even as the sannin was tutoring him. In under two years, whilst also focusing on learning to wield the elements and tap into the forces of nature.
... Well, it was his clones that focused on such matters. Still, the Pervy Sage assured him that he was at least a decade ahead of the rest of the pack. Creeping towards the level of a Jonin.
In other words, he was feeling good about himself and had every right to. So bold was he that he felt skilled enough to try to improve the works of Lord Second himself. There was nothing particularly wrong with the Hiraishin. Lord Fourth's claim to infamy came about in no small part because of the thunder god technique. Of course, coupled with his inhuman levels of raw physical speed and reflexes. And it was there that lay the problem.
Naruto was quick for all its worth, faster than most, but he could not beat Jiraiya in a foot race, not by half. All the more his reflexes were lacking by measure to the sage. According to his sensei, Lord Fourth would leave their shared teacher in the dust on routine. Even from a young age – an age younger than Naruto was – Minato Namikaze shined.
So if he were to make the Hiraishin his own, he needed to compensate somehow. He would outpace the Fourth and all other Hokage someday. But Akatsuki were on their heels even now. Sasuke was in Orochimaru's clutches even now. He needed to find a means to catch up immediately. Someday was something he could not wait on.
Thus so, he'd discovered how to make up for the deficit. Didn't take a horde of brainstorming either.
He could combine the aspects of barrier fūinjutsu with the Hiraishin. If successful, he would be able to create a field where every inch was a Hiraishin marker. Throwing kunai would be a thing of the past. Placing down marks on objects and enemies would serve as an option, not a must. He would achieve the closest thing to true teleportation that Konoha had ever seen.
And had he stopped there, his story might have turned out different. Tests proved the technique stable. All with a malleable range adjusted at the cost of some chakra. A limitation like that was a non-issue for a chakra juggernaut such as Naruto.
The only flaw – if you nitpicked – was that the field traced a translucent glow around its edges. Naruto saw it as fine. It was the Pervy Sage that pointed out how smarter enemies would exploit the 'error'. Flee from the field's territory at the first chance. He wished to ignore the criticism, but it bugged him. Bugged him enough to send him back to the drawing board. The already Frankensteined Hiraishin seemed stable enough. What would a few more fūins hurt? A seal of invisibility here? A seal to camouflage energy signatures there?
Hence he fucked around.
"Done!" He cheered falling back on his bed with a blissful sigh. So contented was he that he hadn't noticed the seal let off a premature glow. He didn't notice at all until it erupted with a golden energy that consumed him wholesale.
It left not a trace of him…
Hence he found out.
Naruto awoke to the feeling of something nipping at his feet. That was not a metaphor either.
Blinking the blaring light of the sun from his eyes, he looked down. There, a small black and gray puppy nipping at his heel, left exposed by his ninja sandals.
'Better than the toes,' he wagered. The puppy might find more success had it targeted him there.
The little dog was growling and snarling in an almost cute way. Making to remove the footwear from the blonde's limb or take a chunk of flesh. For that, it'd be more successful to go for the shoe. Shinobi were made of tougher stuff than the canine's fangs.
'Wha? Where am I?' he thought as he shook his foot out of the puppy's grasp. More concerned with his current dwellings than he was with the angry little animal.
Rubbing his eyes and staggering to his feet, the lost boy tried to take stock of this situation. He saw that he was in a small clearing in a wooded area. Likely a forest if the sounds of birds and other things were anything to go by.
He wasn't in any sort of dangerous area and he should be able to make it back to civilization in time. But for that, he needed to think. And to do that in turn, he needed some quiet.
Now if he could get that damned screaming dude to shut up so he could gather his thou… "Crap!" Naruto screeched as he booked it for where the screams were coming from. A chakra-empowered leap carried him to the top of the trees. The blonde boy moved like the wind as he navigated the wooded area with deft ease. The Shinobi of Konohagakure no Sato were veritable spirits of the forest. When it came to moving about plains consumed by trees, there were none better. Naruto was no exception to that rule, so he had managed to get the man in sight within moments.
He came down to another pup like the one he shook off earlier. Yet this one was giving off a sort of superiority and power a tier unlike – above – the one he woke up to.
The pup led the assault, but there were at least a dozen others aside. Of them all, there was a rather large one that exuded vitality. Not only bigger, and tougher, but still not on level with the pack's leader.
All the same, the dogs weren't much of a threat to Naruto. Heedless, he jumped down and snatched the lead Puppy by the scruff of its neck and held it aloft.
Feeling itself leave the ground, the boss beast put up a fuss. It snarled and growled and barked at the insolent human.
"Yeah, yeah, shut up a minute, would ya..." Naruto handled the dog with an offhand ease. He looked to the old man still calling for help in his fear and mania. "You okay?"
Professor Birch was having a rough go of it as of late. His beloved wife was becoming testy with him with increasing regularity. All the work of a Pokémon Researcher wore on his free time and his wife's patience. His lab, while well equipped for sure, has a staff that consists of a single assistant and himself. Undermanned for sure. Such was it that he relied on his daughter to carry out the field data.
He never had enough time, ever.
So his wife – so full of love in that caring heart of hers – was often left alone. It'd gotten worse when his daughter snagged a scholarship to a leading Pokémon school in Sinnoh. It was one of those renowned schools. One that its graduates were held up as superior in their fields of study. Pokémon-focused Corporations hired from those types of schools directly. If she played her cards right, his daughter could have a job lined up right out of graduation. She couldn't turn it down. He wouldn't allow it, not at the cost of a bright future.
This did mean that fieldwork was on him now. What a great joy for him.
This and his habit of getting lost in his research all the time meant that much of his family life was neglected. This included his wife. She had been quick to bring it up and he did promise to do better. But his 'better' wasn't good enough.
This came to a bit of a head this morning.
He needed to leave early to gather field samples.
She wanted to have a nice breakfast together.
Such plans could not mesh, so a discussion ensued. That discussion became an argument. That argument became her storming out, making for a diner. All without a promise of when she'd be back.
The sun was still rising and already his mood was foul and mind clouded. So preoccupied with his thoughts he forgot to take some basic precautions. He didn't bring any Pokémon with him into the field. He didn't have so much as a Pokéball. Worst of it, he didn't pay attention to his surroundings until long surrounded by a horde of Poochyena. There was a Boss Pokémon at the lead and a Huge-Species pulling up the rear.
He knew how much trouble he was in. He knew that this might be where he dies. He knew that he could only call out for help and pray to Arceus that some trainer was close enough to save him. Only a full team of Pokémon could stand a chance against this gathering. So you could imagine his surprise with a blonde boy, 15 at most, dropped out of the sky for the save. He picked up the Boss Poochyena by the scruff of his neck. He scolded it like a puppy, not the leader of a frenzied hunting party.
The professor watched in shocked amusement as the boy lipped off the Dark Type Pokémon. His tone was so dismissive and unbothered.
"You okay?"
"Ah..." right, he was acknowledging him. "Yes! Thank you for your timely arrival."
"Yeah no worries," was the boy's easy reply. "Scared of dogs or something?"
"Well no..." he felt sullen. The Poochyena was defenseless against the kid's grip. Its pack holding back, weary of the blond to an unnatural degree. Pokémon never feared humans, but they kept their distance here. How strange. He couldn't hope to stir that sort of reaction from any Pokémon. "... That Pokémon is of the Boss Class and its pack is something of a fuss as well. I'm ill-equipped to handle them. I left my own Pokémon back at my lab, you see."
"Poké-what?"
"GRRRRRAAAYYGHH!" The Poochyena– the misbehaving pup – had enough and tried for an attack. It used Howl – bolstering its strength – and tried for a Bite. Its target? The hand that held him – fangs glowing with a fierceness. Yet reaching his head back at such an angle was a non-starter. Helpless, he started barking for the others to stop their whimpering and supply back up.
The gaggle of the Poochyena – the massive one amongst them – moved to attack. One after another, they used Howl to empower themselves.
The boy seeming so confused and irate, rounded on them. To their howling, he let out a guttural roar that didn't sound like it should be coming from a human's mouth. Some of the Poochyena ran away, yet the rest passed out of fright – foam pouring from their maws. The last Poochyena left conscious, the Boss of the bunch was trying to curl into himself out of fear. He still dangled from the boy's mitt but still had a good go of trying to mimic a ball.
"Okay, it's a little bit more quiet now. So... what's a pocky moon?"
Professor Birch spent the next hour explaining all about Pokémon and the world they lived in. Naruto felt it as his skin grew pale and clammy. This couldn't be right or real.
Birch finished with all the ins and outs of the 'wondrous' beings that inhabit this world. By the time he was, Naruto was about ready to lie back down. It could be that he was dreaming. If he went back to sleep, would be awakened from this nightmare?
But dreams didn't feel this real, now did they? He could smell. He could feel pain. Those weren't common to dreams, not by one measure or any other. But if it was a dream... then...
'This is real,' he mustn't panic. Panicking wouldn't solve anything. He should focus on something else. Anything else.
He looked down to the Poochyena that was resting on his lap. Absent of mind, he'd been petting it all the whilst he listened to the professor lecture. A good enough distraction. "So this puppy is a Pokémon?"
"Yes, this one is a particular variant of a Pokémon that's common to these parts." The Professor answered. He gave a smile to the now pacified Poochyena. It nuzzled into the touch of the blonde. It was hard to tell that it was yelping and cowering at him not long ago. "If you would be so kind as to show me back to my lab. I'd be happy to introduce you to other examples of Pokémon. There you could tell me why a lad of fifteen has no idea about Pokémon... creatures that inhabit every corner of our world."
Naruto a nervous smile crept onto Naruto's face. He chuckled while scratching the back of his head. "I could try, but I doubt you'll believe me."
"My boy, I study worms made of rock that grow to almost 60 feet long. Have made my business researching flower seeds that move all on their own. Those that can spontaneously turn into full-grown walking, singing sunflowers. Let me be the one to decide if I can believe you," the Professor countered kindly.
"Okay, here goes," Naruto said as he laid the Poochyena on the ground and bade it farewell. After which, he turned to the Professor. "I'm from a place called the Elemental Nations..." And so, he began a winded explanation of things as they made for the professor's hometown. It made for a broad overview. Years of truancy left him with a questionable understanding of his world and its history. The professor only got the broad strokes of it, up to the Fuinjutsu experiment at least. It was at that point that he slipped into rambling. On and on he went about how it should have worked and what could have happened. It left the professor scrambling for paper to take notes. Naruto's rate of words per minute went into overdrive. He was more talking to himself than he was explaining anything.
Neither noticed their third traveling companion as they went.
In the professor's lab, Naruto had time to sit and think.
Was telling the old guy so much a good idea?
Had he told him too much?
Could it be that he hadn't told him enough?
He left out mentions of his village and its secrets, the Kyūbi included. All for obvious reasons.
None of that should prove a problem. It's not like it would come up. There were no shinobi around here. These 'ninjas' as the professor called them were a pale imitation and leagues away – in Kanto – at that. If there weren't any shinobi here, there shouldn't be a need to draw the Kyūbi's power to defend himself. For all he cared, the fox could stay asleep until they made it back home.
Speaking of home, he needed to work on a way back as soon as possible. He didn't have his scrolls and notes for the Hiraishin Ryōiki (Flying Thunder god Field/Territory). He would have to work from memory. Not good, that was not good at all. He'd been awake for well too long working on the field's enhancements. Between that and rushing to the Professor's aid, his brain was fried.
Dead tired, but too wired to sleep. What was his life becoming?
Whatever. He was too out of it to be sure that he could remember everything to the exact detail.
'Looks like I got my work cut out for me if I want to get home.' It was times like this that he wished for simpler times. Gone were the days of goofing around with Gamakichi... and Gama... tat... su... His brain came to a screeching halt. And when it started again, he smacked himself. "The Toads!"
"I'm sorry!?" His sudden exclamation jolted the professor. The files he'd been shuffling through dropped to the floor in his panic.
"One thing I forgot to cover was... well a lot... but there's talking animals back home that wield jutsu like shinobi do. They work with us as summoned beasts." Naruto was quite excited as he explained. This could be his way back. If he could contact the toads, they could reverse summon him home. He ran through the hand signs, then bit his thumb until he drew blood. Slamming his hand into the ground, he pushed a fair amount of chakra into the summoning. Okay, he flooded it, but he couldn't be blamed. He was eager. It was enough that he expected to see the boss toad appear before him, yet all he got was a cloud of smoke.
He waved his hands across the roaring smoke. He needed to figure out who he summoned.
"Umm Naruto, my boy, what was that?"
"That… is a very bad sign." Naruto stared at the spot, wide-eyed. From the clearing smokescreen came... nothing, not even a tadpole.
"No."
"No."
"No!"
"NO!"
Naruto rushed through a gauntlet of jutsu. He was exhausting every option that stood even the slimmest of slim chances of getting him home.
Summoning wouldn't work, so he opted to be direct and try reverse summoning himself. That failing, he tried to reach out to any of the markers he placed down. He targeted every last one that he left in the many villages and towns that the Pervy Sage and he visited. After that, he opted to begin scribbling down notes for seals that could in theory send him back home. That or jettison him into the void between dimensions. But what was life without risk? Yet for all he tried, he still arrived back to fūins that were too reminiscent of the Hiraishin to be viable.
"Y'OUCH!" He screeched. His gaze bolted down to the Poochyena biting down on his hand. It was not enough to draw blood, but very near to it. Wait- why was there a Poochyena in the Professor's lab?
"NARUTO!"
"Huh!?" Naruto whipped around to stare at the Professor. He was well and properly red in the face. He raised an inquisitive eyebrow at the sight. "Why are you yelling? I'm right here, 'ttebayo."
"Poochyena and I have been calling out to you for the last 30 minutes."
"Ooohhhh," he turned and looked at the desk. He took in the entire site for the first time. Sheets of paper covered in notes were haphazardly stacked into massive, messy piles. The garbage bin to the immediate left of the desk was running over with balled-up paper. Those held his theories not even worth keeping. "Sorry… hehehe." He had the decency to look sheepish as he stared back at the Professor. "But what did you need?"
"More things than one," the Professor admitted in a tone that didn't bother to hide his exasperation. "First off…" He shot a finger toward the Poochyena that was still chewing on his hand. More like playful nips rather than a proper bite; it was almost as if the little guy was teething. "... The Boss Poochyena seems to have followed us back to the lab. It snuck in without our notice and refuses to leave your side… resistance is futile." to that he curved a thumb back to a man covered in Band-Aids and still wrapping more about himself.
By the man's side was a horde of Pokémon. There was a Fennekin, Popplio, Ralts, and Tyrunt. He figured he got all those names right. All of them lay dazed and out of it thoroughly. They looked like they'd been through a tussle and came out on the losing end.
Seeing them in such states had him looking back to Poochyena. It was equal parts scorched, soaked, and dirt-ridden – he noticed – yet it still stood proud and tall. Well, tall for its short stature. "What's the matter, boy? Don't you want to go back to your pack?"
At that, Poochyena let loose a series of gruff barks that Naruto understood well. Not that he could speak dog – such was a secret that the Inuzuka kept close to their chest. But he'd aggravated enough people to know it when he saw or heard it. He didn't need to understand the words spoken. "Uh… so you want to stay here?"
More howls of discontent.
"You can't want to stay with me, right?" Those proved the magic words. The Boss Poochyena leaped up onto his lap and stomped around in a circle three times before lying down. His head rested against his knee as he tumbled off to sleep. And like that, he was now a dog papa. Naruto looked up to the Professor who had a camera in hand and a smile on his face.
"Is this entertaining to you?"
"Yes."
"I can't keep him."
"And why's that?" Birch looked almost offended. As if the very notion of Naruto ridding himself of the Bite Pokémon was a crime.
"I mean, besides the fact that I'm not a trainer? Aren't I supposed to choose a starter before I go catching Pokémon?"
"Sometimes we do choose the starter. But there are times when the starter chooses us. As much is true for any Pokémon you might encounter."
Naruto looked down at the little dog. He was a feisty little guy, adorable and fierce in equal measure. And he did owe Kiba a rematch. This time it could be with his dog trouncing Akamaru, while he clobbered the Spare of the Inuzuka Clan.
"You'll need a name though." He wondered aloud. "What to name ya? Kuromaru? No, a bit too on the head…" That and he was pretty sure that there was a Kuromaru back in Konoha. Kiba had complained about having to train with his mom and Kuromaru on occasion. Be he a man or beast, was a fact unknown to Naruto.
But that's beside the point, Kuromaru was out.
"Kurohasu."
"Black Lotus?" Birch made to confirm.
"Yeah, it's a good name!"
"Teenagers." Birch shook his head. "But Kurohasu it is, at least until you choose to change it… I hope you choose to change it…"
"I won't!"
"Right…" Birch dropped his shoulders in a grand, dramatic fashion. "... I'll collect a Pokéball and Pokédex for you."
"Not needed, I'm on the next ride out of this world."
Birch frowned and his face drooped. He seemed so solemn as he shook his head. "We don't know when that ride might come, my boy." It was a harsh truth that he had to share. But in the immediate after, he started up with renewed vigor. "So while you're here it is my duty as an adult to make sure your stay is as pleasant as we can make it."
Naruto felt apprehensive about the idea, hesitant of such a notion. "I shouldn't get too comfortable."
"Trust me, even as a man that's younger than he looks, I'm still old-"
Naruto's eyes zeroed in on Birch. "You look about 49?"
"I'm 42!" Birch screeched but thought better of ranting. He shook his head and slapped his cheeks. "But right as a 42-year-old that definitely still looks like he's in his late 20s-"
"Not even the blind would buy tha-"
"AS!… I was saying. I've been in your shoes-"
"Hurled into another dimension?"
"Precisely!"
"Wait, really!"
"Yes, with Pokémon, peculiar things like winding up on a new world or plan of existence aren't unheard of."
"Why didn't you say so before!? What you know can be a huge help!"
"Hmm, I question that," Birch admitted, rubbing his chin. "My experience was rather different from your own. There's little correlation between the two."
"So you didn't get stuck in some bizarre new world, too."
"Only slightly bizarre, I'll admit. It was a mirror dimension that was almost identical to this reality. Except concepts like Mega Evolution were unheard of and my baby girl was a baby boy."
"That's a bit boring."
"So I've been told. At this point, I've made it a habit not to bring it up in conversations."
"How did you get back?"
"The Unown that stole me away finally decided to return me home after 6 months of searching for a path back. Turns out I was swapped with that world's Birch. From the misses tales, he was as dumbfounded. as me"
"Unown?"
Birch chuckled. The boy was quick on the uptake, if single-minded. "That's for another time, no more distractions, let me get my speech out before I lose the thought."
Naruto waved off Birch in a grandiose fashion. "Fine. The stage is yours."
"Right, I've been in your shoes. I chose to focus only on getting back home, ignored the world, and put my nose in the books. And do you know what I got for that?"
"A way home?"
"A trip to the hospital with a case of severe exhaustion. Right along with a diagnosis of malnourishment, dehydration, and high blood pressure. After that, that world's version of my wife dragged me from the labs and off to have... err... fun." He couldn't very well tell him that they'd run off to Mauville and gambled at the Casinos until their coffers ran dry.
"Even though she knew that I wasn't her Birch, she wouldn't let me kill myself from the stress. I still missed home, but when I stopped letting it be my only focus, I felt like I was finally living again. So I'll not let you waste your youth cooped up in a sterile lab all day, drowning in notes."
"Not sterile." Pokémon might be special little animals, but their piss smelled no better than a regular one.
"Not my point."
"Which is?"
"If we single-mindedly pursue our objectives, only suffering awaits us. Humans were meant to venture out into the world. To experience new sensations, meet new people, to take in the fullness of this life. We're meant to live, through all triumphs and failures, you must remember that."
Something struck true for Naruto.
'Single-minded pursuits could only lead to suffering.'
Those words repeated over and again in his mind.
Was that not what Sasuke was doing? That mentality, was that not what he was doing everything to pull him out of?
"Right," Naruto nodded slowly. Birch was right and that was a somber thought. He was still unsure of himself, but in the face of despair, he would choose hope – as he always had.
"I'll take that Pokédex and Ball after all."
"Right! I'm on it!"
Authors Notes:
Ro: Yo, I'm Ro, one-third of the entity that is the ShaRoNa Experience. It's short for Shadow, Ro, and Nana for all one and a half of you who were wondering. Thanks for reading this first chapter. Please leave your opinions, criticisms, praise, suggestions, and questions in the review box below. We'd appreciate that a lot. More reviews mean quicker updates, we're shooting for biweekly updates, but supply us with enough motivation and we can throw a new chapter out after only a few days... on occasion.
To cover a few things. While this story is based in the Hoenn Region and will loosely follow the events of Emerald. We actually played Emerald Enhanced in preparation for this story, so we'll be borrowing a lot from there. Emerald Enhanced in a modified version (Rom Hack) of Pokémon Emerald. It switches up the playing experience in many ways, such as:
-Dawn being Birch's daughter (don't worry May will appear down the line)
-Pokémon from the later generations being common to Hoenn
-Mega Evolution
-The ability to challenge the gyms in any order
-Characters being aged up
-A romance system (harem route included), etc.
And a number of other changes, any and all of which might pop up in this story.
You already saw this a bit, with the inclusion of 'Huge-Species' and 'Boss' Pokémon. Huge-Species Pokemon are self-explanatory. They're extra large Pokémon, kind of like Alpha Pokémon from Legends Arceus. Boss Pokémon are Pokémon that are tougher and stronger than normal Pokémon. Having 31 IVs across the board, Hidden Ability, Special Moves, etcetera. If you don't know about IVs are, all it means is that their stats are maxed out.
That's it for me. Shadow and Nana don't have anything to say this go around, but I'm sure they'll speak up eventually. Otherwise, Ja Ne~!
