The words on the script made James' palms sweat, he was not sure if in a good or bad way, he just felt the profuse sweating making the page stick to his skin and he did not like the sensation, the reaction to the words on the page felt foreign to him as he kept reading.
"And are we sure this is where Gilderoy wants the show to go to?" James asked, hoping his voice was steady. He had had a few awkward moments while his voice was changing as he grew up in the show, but he was over it by now. He didn't want the uneasiness to show in his voice.
"Yes, he did a previous revision, but that remains the same, he checked with Albus as well." Kingsley informed James, as the younger man took a pen from his pocket, clicking it a couple of times out of nerves and habit, before writing his own notes on the margins of the script.
"Any directions from Dumbledore? Or is he just trying to play it by ear?" James asked, pausing in his notes to look at Shacklebolt.
Kingsley shrugged, "At the moment he wants to see how it plays out, you two have been playing with these characters for a while now. You know them better than anyone." he admitted, and James nodded.
"Thank you," James said absentmindedly, as Kingsley left to prepare for filming. He was still thinking about the words on the page, and the scene he would have to participate in sooner rather than later.
Being in a show since before your voice changed did a lot to impact a young boy's life. Instead of school and classmates, you had private lessons and castmates that felt more like family than random people in a place of work. And that also meant that small grudges grew over time, or changed into something else entirely.
At the moment he was uncertain of how the grudges and feelings had evolved as he read the script in his hands.
James had to admit that acting was just about him getting his energy out, a way to express himself, and for his parents to keep him occupied. Or it was like that at the beginning. He never thought that he would make a career out of it, no one at 11 thinks of a job or the responsibility it carries, at least not like adults do. But the more he acted, the more he enjoyed it, and the better he wanted to be.
He started taking his career more seriously, took acting lessons, asked a lot of questions on direction, and requested feedback from older actors and more experienced people in the industry. It was quite the change from his previous stance of 'I'll do it because it's fun, besides no one would fire the cute main lead'. A change that many have seen as a positive improvement and actually welcome and encourage it.
Sirius, his best friend in set and life, had found it annoying at first, James and him used to do a lot of shenanigans around set, and he always teased him for his new found work ethic. He had to admit that Sirius put little effort on the craft but was an amazing actor all the same, always brought emotion to the characters he played, however, was more passionate about their band than acting, and was always teasing James about his new purchased books and courses.
James had tried to share his interest with his best mate, and Sirius reluctantly had taken a few of the books with him. The teasing persisted but James could see Sirius' curiosity spiking at new theories and techniques, even if the other man preferred to write lyrics than study lines.
Sirius was also privy, as was his other close friend Remus, about the difficulty to work with one Lily Evans. She was the co-star of the show, and had it out for James since day one when he tried to do a trick on a skateboard and managed to ruin her big-scene dress. James had never managed to outlive that.
Their relationship had been odd from the start, Lily had decided that James was the worse person to step in the set, and the fact that they had so many scenes together didn't help improve her perception, neither did the numerous pranks that James had played on her and her former friend Snape, who used to be part of the cast.
James had learned not to prank people over the years, or at least to be more conscious of the types of pranks that were done. But he believed the damage was done and his and Lily's relationship was one that would only blossom on screen.
However, that might be the nerves talking. Lily in reality had grown fond of the boys, especially after Snape left and he was not whispering how annoying the rest of the cast was. She managed to see how witty James was, Sirius' intelligence and knowledge of music and business, and Remus' interesting facts and inherited sweetness. She had grown fond of all of them, and she hoped that they could see that they had outgrown the annoying little children they all used to be.
Not only because of the work, that was easier to do when everyone got along, but because she wanted to be friends with people she spent the majority of the time with. To have meaningful relationships that would last them more than just a set life.
If James had bothered to go find Lily, instead of getting anxious about asking Sirius' some questions regarding the upcoming scene, he would have seen that Lily was almost in the same predicament as him. Pondering on the words written on the pages, and how she felt about it.
Lily read the whole episode again. According to the notes from the director, her character was nervous, which she wouldn't even have to act at that point. She had been pacing in her trailer with the pages in hand since receiving them. Her and James' character had always had a more friendly relationship, sometimes annoying each other, sometimes too close to believe that they were just part of the same friend group, and now, their relationship was going to define what they were.
Lily was not sure how she felt about how definitive it all felt.
In all the time Lily had been in the show all she thought was making her family proud, her friends outside of the business proud, and to do a good job, because she understood how many little girls would feel related to her character and that felt like a huge responsibility but it made her excited to come to work every day.
It was hard to go through puberty in a show that had mostly male actors, and where the one she thought was a close friend turned out to be creepy and not at all friendly. She had to deal with a lot, and she was thankful that she had Mary for most of it. But she knew that she had annoyed her best mate when talking about James.
James had always been a topic for Lily, after all they had a lot of scenes together, but it had fluctuated from annoyance to friendship so much that her feelings were muddled and her thoughts waver from one side of her feelings to the other. She knew that going to Mary in these circumstances was not advisable, as her friend would probably tease again that she had always had a crush on Potter, just as much as the crush she had on Black on and off screen.
Lily was not ready to deal with all of it.
The lights on set made the chilly day of March feel toasty. Lily believed that the studio didn't need the central heating with the hard lights on them. It was a miracle that the makeup stayed put under that heat, and it was the second time under the same lights that she felt like trembling from nerves.
The first time she was eleven and it was her first big show, she had been wanting to prove herself with the network's executives. She thought she would butch all her lines, and to be honest she could have given herself more space to mess up and enjoy. She was eleven, a few lines missed or misspoken would not be the end of the world.
Yet, it felt like the world was ending.
But then, there was this boy, with messy hair and thick glasses, that made everyone in the set laugh, and was apologetic about missing his queues, or even fidgeting with his hair, when he was not supposed to, it would be a mess for editing the show.
And she was jealous, and furious that this boy could enjoy as much as he wanted, that he could be so casual when she was a mess.
With time she learned that the tale that James' messing with his hair meant he was nervous, and the jokes were half a tale too. He did enjoy making people having a good time, but they could be a distraction from how on edge he was.
It took Lily a long time to learn these things about James, and the more she knew about him, the more she liked him.
Which was why she was a mess right before the big scene.
James grew from the thin little prat, to be a handsome young man. He still made silly jokes, and his hands stopped just as he was about to mess his hair, but his dedication to the job had changed. He was serious about the scenes, he made sure he got notes from the writer and the director; didn't mind doing retakes when necessary, and was mindful that Lily would be in some of the shoots so he tried his best to stick to script.
He also remembered the snacks she liked and always brought some to rehearsal, and was sure to warn her of any possible paparazzi on set. He always managed to remember her birthday, and her families', and was always kind when her sister and her friends gushed to him on set. Something Lily really hated, but seeing him be attentive like that made her stomach twist in weird ways.
Lily was not alone in her nerves. James was right there with her.
Lily had been a constant in James' life, either by scolding him or making him better. He didn't know exactly when the little annoying girl had transformed into the gorgeous young woman that he had a crush on, but that was where they were at, and now they had a crucial scene together. A scene that was more personal than anything, and he was not sure that he liked that it happened in front of the cameras.
As James stepped in position he remembered if he properly brushed his teeth, which he had; and he had eaten a mint as well. He tried to not think of how potent, or not, was his deodorant under the heavy set lights, and all in all he tried to be presentable not only for the job but for the scene.
"I guess we are doing this." he mumbled, more to himself than to anyone.
"We certainly are, Potter." Lily replied with a smile, that made James' nerves shake even harder.
"Everyone ready, we'll be rolling, so silence in the set!" James heard the voice of Kingsley in the background, but was focused on Lily's green eyes, and the rose tinted lips that were glossed for the scene and the cameras.
Lily looked back at him, her lips moving as if to say something. But James mind did not register any of what was being set, his mind focused on her lips and expression.
"Matt?" he finally heard what Lily had said, it was the name of his character, the one that he had been playing for so long that he almost replied when he heard it.
"I'm sorry, but what did you mean by that?" He knew what the line was, and Lily and himself had improvised in the past, knowing that stopping the take might delay the production more than just a tiny messed up line.
"Well, how do you know it is me you fancy? I thought you were dating Nancy." Lily's voice carried, and James remembered the plot where their love triangle with Sirius' character became even more complex.
"I am not. I'm not dating anyone." he sounded sincere because in reality he wasn't, there was no one he wanted to date but his co-star, but he knew she didn't like him that way. However, just for a moment he could pretend that these were not the characters talking. "There's no one else, it's you, Audrey, it's always been you."
For a brief moment James wished that it was Matt, the character, the person saying those words, but himself, to Lily, wonderful and gorgeous Lily.
That moment passed quickly as her eyes pressured him to move forward, not to stop and continue with the scene. And he did.
James' hands moved on their own accord wrapping themselves on Lily's waist and pulling her closer. He felt her breath on his cheek and her green eyes on him, as if the universe was telling him that his wish of this being a kiss between them was coming true.
He let his body continue, his nervous thoughts forgotten as his lips touched Lily's.
Lily's arms wrapped around his neck, and her hands moved to his hair, grabbing hold of his nape, keeping him close as her lips reciprocated whatever he was giving.
She tasted like cherry lip gloss and something sweet like vanilla and apple tart.
He tasted like mint and those dark chocolates he was always snacking during takes.
Lily's apple shampoo and her flowery perfume mixed with James' senses, as James' musky scent made her want to pull him closer and taste more of his lips and feel more of his body.
They were in their own little world, a perfect kiss, for the perfect culmination of a career, but more so, for better expressing exactly what one felt for the other.
Neither of them wanted it to end.
Yet they were not alone, and a repetitive "Cut!" could be heard from somewhere near them, pulling them back to earth.
"Way to go Prongs!" James heard Sirius say.
The whole set bursted laughing, including the couple.
One thing was sure, they no longer were only castmates.
