Chapter V:

Vaggie knocked on the door of this mysterious house across the street from the Hazbin Hotel. The door opened ajar with a chain to keep it closed. A single eye peaked out of the darkness at her.

Mysterious Voice: Come on in.

The mysterious voice opened the door and welcomed Vaggie into his house. He stayed under his cloak and escorted Vaggie to his basement. Vaggie felt quite nervous as she followed this mysterious man. Once they reached his basement, the man turned on a light and pulled the hood of his cloak down. To Vaggie's surprise, it was Mr. LadLard.

LadLard: Hello Vaggie. Are you looking for this? (pulls out carton of half n half)

Vaggie: Wait, it was you who bought up all the half n half.

LadLard: Yes, and the whole milk and heavy cream, so you couldn't make it yourself.

Vaggie: But why?

LadLard: It was all a ruse, you pathetic little ant. For you see, I, Mr. LadLard was the mastermind the ENTIRE TIME. Every single thing that's happened to you over the last 24 hours was orchestrated by me and my INSANE mind.

Vaggie: Wait, so even when I got robbed, that was you?

LadLard: Yes, all delicately coordinated beforehand, using paid actors and animatronics.

Vaggie: What about the stampede and the shark attacks?

LadLard: Yes, all me. The whole thing cost me $750,000 and over eight months of planning, just to lead you RIGHT here, into the palms of my hands.

Vaggie: Why would you do this?

LadLard: To make one simple request.

Vaggie: Ok, what is it?

LadLard: I was just wondering if you wanted to HANG OUT with me, and snort crack, and fill our bellies with ZERO SUGAR soda, and watch Madagascar 3: Europe's Most Wanted.

Vaggie: (pulls out her spear) How about I kill you, and rip that half n half from your dead hands!?

LadLard: (wagging his finger) Ah ah ah.

Just then, Mr. LadLard pulled off his cloak, revealing a bomb strapped to his chest. As he did, Vaggie gasped in fear.

LadLard: If you lay your filthy paws on me, I'll blow this entire city to SMITHEREENS.

Vaggie: (looks scared)

LadLard: So, what'll it be, Vaggie?

Vaggie: (gives dirty look)