Impostor syndrome is a bitch, y'all.

If you're wondering where I've been, I've been dealing with that. It's gotten way better, and I'm slowly getting back to normal writing speed. It's been a bit nerve-wracking working on my long fics while I go through this, so hopefully getting this chapter out will help.

Either way, fair warning for Implied/Referenced Sex and Implied/Referenced Nudity from this point forth, mostly due to Raith shenanigans. Nothing to make this explicit and nothing we haven't seen in the series' books, but enough to give y'all a heads up.

And now, onto the fic! Hope you enjoy the new chapter!


October 13th, One Year Ago


"You shithead!"

The drink shattered against the stone wall. Shards exploded outward in a shower of salt, tequila, and glass. I'd dodged it in time, but a stray piece of glass nicked my left eyebrow, causing a light trail of blood to fall across my eyelid.

"Fuck you!" my attacker screeched. She was easily in her early twenties, with a tattoo sleeve that went up her entire right arm. Her brown hair was wild around her face, and the bloodshot look in her green eyes told me that she'd probably, scratch that, definitely taken something.

"I'm pretty sure I deserved that," I said smoothly, tucking my hands into my jean pockets as I looked her up and down. "But you could at least tell me why I deserved it."

The woman was pretty, no doubt about that. She had toned legs that were noticeable through her skin-tight leggings, red stilettos, and silver jewelry that was highlighted by the club's harsh lights. Her black leather jacket was open, giving me a glimpse at her naked chest. The sides of her breasts peeked out from beneath.

She looks tasty, a voice purred in the back of my mind. Three steps forward, and she's right in arms' reach of us.

I ignored it.

This wasn't the first time someone had screamed at me while I was just minding my own business at Zero. The club is loud, filled with bright lights that cycle between white and blue, and a deep thumping bass-music that makes it hard for regular humans to hear most conversations. Most of the people here are either drunk, high, or both. Those who are sober are typically going at it on the dance floor or really going at it on the catwalks. And most of the non-sober ones will end up there, anyway.

I've done my fair share of things at Zero. It's the place where I first had a threesome. The first place where I woke up naked outside of my own bed. The first place where a random drunk guy socked me in the jaw—something that Elisa still gives me shit about. The club might change places, it might change its decor, and it might even change the dancers that routinely dance in tall cages with only strips of clothing to pass for underwear, but the essence always stays the same.

"You were supposed to meet me one hour ago!" the woman shrieked. She looked around, presumably for another glass to throw, but we were near the edge of the dancefloor and away from the bar. "You expect me to just sit and wait for you?"

Blood was still dripping down my eyelid. I wiped it with the hem of my white t-shirt, staining it red. "I would expect that of you. But only because I have no idea who the hell you are."

"Gina," the woman seethed. Her teeth were stained red with her lipstick. "Hear that? Gi-na. Were you drunk yesterday? Huh? Is that why you don't remember?"

"I think I'd remember you." I strode forward until I could look directly down at her. "It's not every day I find someone with the nerve to injure me when she doesn't even know who I am. Now… I'm intrigued."

Gina looked into my eyes. Took a step back.

Ah, my eyes are silver right now. Aren't they?

"I–" Gina stuttered. Her cheeks glowed red. Her hand reached up toward my chest. "I…"

"I, I?" I said, feeling a grin come onto my face. "You what?"

"I… I—"

"There you are," hummed a low voice, "little brother."

Behind me, Natalia Raith glided toward us in a set of white, velvet high heels. Her eyes gleamed bright gray.

My elder sister is tall, even taller than I am, and proud of it. She was wearing a stark white pantsuit, fitted to better hug her broad shoulders, and was unbuttoned at the top and bottom. Her waves of dark, long hair were pulled into a ponytail that curled at the end. It's a polished look she only goes for once in a blue moon. The kind that makes our father happy yet barely needs to get updated to fit in with current fashion trends.

Natalia's jaw is wide, her chin as well, and it's the kind of strong beauty that makes her look like a warrior who could and would rip you to shreds with a twist of her muscular arms. She only had a spattering of make-up on—a light blush, a hint of eyeliner, and a simple matte lipstick—but she didn't need more.

When you're a full vampire of the White Court, make-up is optional.

Unlike Lara, who could spend an hour perfecting her make-up, or Elisa, who can go through a dozen jewelry boxes before she finds the right piercings, Natalia's one of those people who can get ready in under five minutes. All she needs is two minutes with a hairbrush and whatever outfit's strewn across a chair. It's one of the things we bonded over, when I first moved into the mansion. While our sisters were busy comparing diamond nipple piercings and black eyeshadows, Natalia and I were complaining about them in the living room.

Not exactly prime bonding material, but considering the circumstances back then, we might as well have been making goddamn friendship bracelets.

"I assumed you were preparing to take her upstairs," Natalia said, taking a long look at the woman in front of us. "But if this precious thing is so… rattled, perhaps there's something you've been keeping from me."

I rolled my eyes. "She's not one of mine."

"Bullshit, Madrigal!" Gina growled. "I'd know your slimy, greasy, ass-breaking mug any—"

"Empty Night," Natalia breathed. She strode forward and clutched the woman's face in her hand, tilting her chin upwards. "I should've known you're one of his. Compared to Thomas, Madrigal always likes his ladies on the wilder side."

Gina tilted her eyes, even as she tilted her hips and torso toward Natalia. "You got a problem with that?"

I scoffed. "You're definitely not her taste." I locked eyes with my sister. "But now you've got her attention. And that is a very interesting place to be."

Natalia smirked. "Very true, Thomas." She turned back to Gina. "My cousin seems to be running late, but that doesn't mean I can't have some fun with you until he arrives."

I whistle a low note. Feeding on another vampire's main food source, even if they're not a thrall, is toeing a hard line. As long as Natalia doesn't try to claim this woman as hers, there's no grounds for a proper dispute. But that doesn't mean that Madrigal won't make a fuss over it.

There's still a decent amount of things I don't know about the Raiths. Rarely do they say anything outright, and most of what I have learned has been twisted in one way or another. It's been a process, getting to know them, but there is one thing I can say with full confidence.

My family is never—ever—boring.

While Natalia admired her new girl, I strolled up to a nearby mirror and took in the damage. There was a slight nick in my left eyebrow, but nothing to get hung up on. It's not like it had any chance of scarring. I could already feel the demon in me stitching it up, just like it's been doing for the last six years.

As I always will, said demon rasped in my head. For the rest of our lives.

I know, I thought. I know.

Unlike most people, my reflection is a damn pretty sight. Strong jawline, sculpted nose, defined cheekbones, and lean muscles you can see through my v-neck t-shirt that's so thin it's almost transparent. My hair's dark and curly, landing just above my shoulders. I've grown since I was a kid, hitting my growth spurt when I was about 15 and stopping when I was just a hair short of reaching six feet. But that's not the only thing that's changed.

Staring back at me were silver eyes. Now that I wasn't smelling Gina's overpowering perfume, the color was shifting back to gray, but I knew they wouldn't stay that way for long. These gray eyes, courtesy of my father, were my curse.

A curse I had earned.

Don't be so dramatic, my demon rasped. Without them, you wouldn't have me. And we have done wonderful things together.

I almost rolled my eyes.

"So," I heard Natalia purr. "Would you like to come with me?"

I turned around just in time to see Gina's eyes widen.

She nodded fiercely.

"Good." Natalia took Gina by the hand and led her toward the stairs. "I doubt Madrigal will arrive any time soon, which gives you plenty of time to apologize for throwing your drink at my brother. Speaking of which." She glanced over her shoulder. "Are you coming?"

I glanced at my watch, an old Rolex Lara didn't want anymore. It was early, just after 10pm.

"Why not?" I said.

I've got time.

I followed Natalia up the glass stairs, to a section of suspended platforms. She'd reserved one of them for the night. A king size bed with white silk sheets greeted us, alongside small tables covered by bowls of fresh fruit, cigars, and charcuterie boards. Natalia isn't into cocktails, so the portable bar cart was stocked full of hard liquor and shot glasses.

My sister led Gina over to the bed. This close to her, I could feel Natalia's aura, her Hunger, reach out and touch Gina. A White Court vampire's Hunger isn't tangible, though it may sometimes look that way. It's more of a feeling. A desire. An uncontrollable presence that fills others' mind, body, and soul. It's the power of the demon that lives in each one of us filtering out through our bodies, even if we don't always want it to. It pulls people towards us. It commands.

And it is always hungry.

Without another word, Gina slid out of her leather jacket and red heels. Natalia, more than any of my sisters, likes to be on top, and her Hunger knows. With a flick of her fingers, she guided Gina further back on the bed.

"Want to join?" Natalia asked, slipping out of her own heels. "It's always more fun with company."

I'd already fed that day. I needed the energy for later, and it's the whole reason I was at Zero tonight. Still, Natalia didn't know that. Either way, it wasn't like I was full yet. And now that I was already here…

"Like you said, she's not my type," I said. "But since you're offering, my dear sister, I may as well."


The three of us lay together on the bed, in various states of undress. Natalia and I were on the edges, with Gina in the middle. She was panting, her eyes closed in a dream-like bliss that had her grinning every time Natalia caressed her body. I can see why Madrigal liked her. She was full of furious emotions, mostly anger and resentment, that made her a perfect fit for Madrigal's tastes. House Raith may feed on lust, but that doesn't mean we can't enjoy other emotions while we feed.

"You've settled in well over the years," Natalia said to me. Gina was in such a state of post-sex joy that we didn't worry about her hearing us. It's likely that the only thing she'll remember from this night was the ecstasy of being with two White Court vampires—not that she knew what we were.

"How could I not?" I hopped out of bed and stretched. It hadn't been a long session, but it was past 11, and I had to get a move on if I wanted to get to the theater on time. "I've got pleasure at the tips of my fingernails. Unless you're saying you'd rather I stay in my room all day and live off of call girls I have to pay for."

Natalia laughed. "Better than what… certain family members prefer."

I paused for a moment. As indirect as that statement was, it was brave for Natalia to even consider saying out loud. Much less at a place like Zero.

Unlike the head of our House, my sisters and I have an unspoken pact to never have sex with someone we consider family. Not even our cousins, who have far wilder tastes than we do. Even just now, with Gina, Natalia and I took turns being with her and feeding off her energy.

White Court vampires tend to be open, and inviting, with their siblings when it comes to their sex lives. We cross lines and boundaries that'd have most mortals gag at even the thought of it. It was an adjustment, at first. But I've learned to adapt to it. To accept it. It's what lets us survive and keep our demons from feeding on our own life forces, but even we have limits.

My father may have none, but thank God my sisters and I do.

Instead of replying to Natalia and risking someone overhearing us, I picked up my discarded clothes and started sliding into them.

"And where are you going?" Natalia asked, a hint of accusation in her voice.

"I have an appointment."

"Appointment?"

"Yeah." I pulled up my jeans and flashed her a grin. "I'm gonna go grab a bite to eat."

"Oh? So little Gina here was an appetizer?" Natalia snuggled closer to Gina and ran her finger down her collarbone, making Gina sigh and turn toward her. "Are the other ones here not good enough for you? Or do you have some specific tastes I don't know about?"

I picked up my shirt. "Wanna come with and find out?"

"And leave this pretty one?" Natalia moved to caress Gina's chest, smirking as Gina moaned. "Maybe next time, little brother. And for the record, if you are serious about bringing me along, make sure you have someone that's up to my standards waiting for me. You know I'm—"

"Picky?" I scoffed, sliding my feet into their shoes. "That's one way to put it. If I have to listen to another rant about how the smell of hair dye stops you from climaxing, I'll dye my own hair just to piss you off."

Natalia rolled her eyes. "As if I haven't heard that threat from Elisa ever since the damned dye was invented. Leave the wild hairstyles to our sister, Thomas. But next time she asks you to cut it, at least leave some hair on her head."

"No promises," I said. And even before I considered saying goodbye, Natalia was on top of Gina again. I felt her demon's aura grow, and I strolled my way out of there before I'd be tempted to stay.

Now you've made me hungry, my demon rasped.

I ignored it. I'd fed plenty earlier today, and that little session with Gina had more than replenished the energy the demon had used to fix the nick in my eyebrow. A few more bites were tempting, but I didn't have time to scope out another meal. Even a quick one.

Don't try to lie to me. I could practically hear my demon lick its non-existent lips. Go find one at the bar. It'll only take five minutes. And she doesn't even have to be a pretty one.

And you call me impatient, I thought. Poor you, the little demon is whining he didn't get extra dessert. What am I, your parent? You've had enough.

It's never enough, the demon said. And don't try to pretend you can control me. I'm part of you, Thomas. The stronger half. Because no matter what you do, I will always be here. And if you don't feed me, I will consume you. Bit by bit until there is nothing left but ragged flesh. So quit pretending like you can push me aside. Or ignore me.

There is no more you without me, boy. Stop fighting me, and learn to live with me.

It took every muscle in my body to keep my face neutral. To walk out of Zero like I really was on my way to feed on another soul. The demon was right, of course, but I couldn't let my anger show on my face. Not when I was surrounded by people who knew both me and my father.

I may have to live with this demon, and I may have to cooperate with it sometimes, but I didn't have any more time to argue. I was telling Natalia the truth when I said I had an appointment, but it isn't anything to do with sex. It isn't even something related to the White Court.

You see, the magician mercenary has a job tonight.

It's a dangerous contract, one that I'm surprised he took on at all. And it starts soon. Midnight, at the Steppenwolf theater.

It's an odd feeling, going to see him when he won't see me. When he hasn't seen me in over five years. But still, I'm going. And if I play by the rules, he'll never know I was there.