Chapter 25: What We Shouldn't Want
(Thursday September 25 Night Amegakure Inn Room 302)
~Nina~
Nina walked through the quiet halls of the inn, her footsteps echoing softly off the wooden floors. Each step felt heavier, her mind a tangled mess of conflicting thoughts and desires, each pulling her in a different direction. The key Kakashi had handed her felt cold and heavy in her palm as she stared at the door. Her eyes traced its outline, taking in the minor imperfections—the slight scuffs and scratches that told stories of previous guests.
"Here, let me help," Kakashi said, his voice low and smooth in Nina's ear as he stepped closer behind her.
She knew she should just open the door. Let the professional boundaries reassert themselves. After all, the mission required her full attention, and the sooner it was completed, the sooner she could return to Konoha and dedicate herself to the stalled investigation. But all Nina could think about was the feeling of Kakashi's hand on hers—his touch searing through her skin.
Something had shifted.
"Just one," Nina murmured, almost as if speaking to herself.
She turned slowly to face Kakashi, her heart pounding in her chest. The moonlight filtering through the open-cut eaves of the inn's verandah cast a soft glow over his features, accentuating the sharp lines of his jaw and the intensity in his visible eye—a figure carved from shadow and light.
Nina leaned in, her body brushing against his, craving the contact she knew she shouldn't want. "Just one kiss."
Kakashi's hands slid to her waist, firm and possessive, caging her against the door. Nina's body responded instinctively, arching toward him. His right hand came up to her hair, fingers threading through the strands, pulling her closer yet holding her back just enough. Their foreheads pushed together, their breaths mingling in the scant space between their lips.
Nina knew she was being unfair, trusting him to be the one to make it right, to pull back and push everything back into place as it should be.
Why wouldn't he?
They had only ever been shinobi, bound by duty and honour. Comrades. Sometimes, he was her superior; sometimes, he was her patient. But never anything more.
Nina's hands moved to his shoulders, fingers digging into the fabric of his shirt. She could feel his muscles beneath, taut and coiled with restrained power. Her heart raced; each beat a plea for more.
Kakashi's breath fanned heatedly against Nina's lips. "Do you know what you're doing, Sarutobi?"
Nina struggled to take breaths, stilted by the barrier that was his chest. A part of her—a wild, reckless part that she barely recognised—contemplated the simplicity of just giving in completely, of taking this night and making it theirs. They could fuck each other, lose themselves in the physicality of it, and then walk away. It would be easy to omit from mission reports. A one-night stand that meant nothing in the grand scheme of things.
But is it really that simple?
The key was in the lock; it just needed to be turned. Nina's fingers tightened, clutching the fabric of Kakashi's sleeve, needing more. Needing him.
"Not a fucking clue."
~Kakashi~
Kakashi's jaw clenched so tightly he could feel the strain in his neck, a dull ache that matched the burning in his chest. He'd thought about this. More than he should have. He swallowed hard, his throat dry, the taste of longing bitter on his tongue. And then, as if by its own volition, his hand moved to the key. Turning it with a quiet click, he opened the door to their room.
"Go inside, Nina."
Kakashi watched the tiny, almost imperceptible judder of her slender neck as she fought to swallow. He followed in after her, closing the door softly behind them, sealing off the world outside. He ran a hand through his hair, his fingers brushing the familiar fabric of his headband before pulling it off, allowing his Sharingan to adjust to the room's dimness. But his focus quickly shifted elsewhere.
Nina stood with her back to him, artfully framed by the floor-to-ceiling windows. Her silhouette cut a striking figure against the darkness, with the moonlight seeping through the sheer curtains, casting a pale, muted glow that traced the contours of her body in exquisite detail.
Despite better judgment, Kakashi tightened the space between him and the kunoichi. He tried to ground himself in reason, to build a case against what was so clearly unfolding. He thought about his duty, the bet he could barely remember at this point, the inviolable lines, and the consequences of indulging in something that was, by all accounts, forbidden. But each argument he constructed dissolved almost as soon as it formed, vanishing with the ease of a breath.
Nina's hair cascaded down her back in loose, dark waves. Entranced by the sight and scent, Kakashi reached out, his fingers weaving through the silken strands. He gathered her hair and swept it to one side, his knuckles grazing the sensitive skin at the nape of her neck as he did, revealing the bare line of her shoulder.
His hand moved to the cleverly concealed zipper along the side seam of her dress. His fingers paused on the small metal tab as if waiting for some last-minute resolve to rise up and halt his actions. But the moment passed, and the moral clarity of right and wrong became even more indistinct.
Kakashi eased the zipper down, the rasp of the metal teeth loud in the hushed room. Nina's dress slackened, settling in a heap on the curve of her hips, exposing the smooth, olive-toned expanse of her back that had been hidden.
If Sarutobi was nervous, she gave no sign. If she was playing him, he couldn't sense the tell. And if this was all fuelled by the remnants of saké, it didn't show in her poised composure. Her calm was disconcerting, amplifying the tension that thrummed between them like a live wire.
With excruciating precision, Kakashi traced a single finger down the line of her spine, moving from one vertebra to the next, cataloguing her reactions with the meticulousness of a shinobi on high alert. Nina's head tilted back ever so slightly, a shiver rippled through her body, her breath caught momentarily, and he could feel the tension knotting in her shoulders, her control slipping by degrees.
He let his hands slip beneath the loosened fabric of her dress, his palms smoothing over her hips, feeling the warmth of her skin bleeding into his own. It was an act of possession, of claiming something he knew he shouldn't. With two light taps of his fingers against her side—a silent signal entrenched in their tacit code—he passed the choice of what happens next back to her.
The room felt suspended in time. Nina turned to face him, her dress still clinging precariously to her hips as though it might slip away with the slightest provocation. It took every ounce of Kakashi's willpower to keep his hands steady as the kunoichi slid her hands beneath the hem of his shirt, pushing it upwards until it bunched at his chest. He released his hold of her hips, allowing her to lift the shirt over his head.
Nina paused, her hand hovering near his face.
Kakashi had been with women before, women who undressed him with casual indifference. He grasped her upper arm, fearing Sarutobi might do what others had done before. Her eyes locked on his, searching for permission, perhaps, or maybe a sign that this was still within the boundaries they had set, the ones that now felt so far behind them.
There was no rush or frantic attempt to remove his mask. Instead of pulling it down, Nina's fingers skimmed the outline of his lips. Her touch was reverent, almost curious as if she was trying to understand him in a way no one else had ever bothered to. But then, as if the weight of what she was about to do became too much, Nina dropped her hand, her eyes flicking away from his as she stepped back, retreating into herself. Kakashi could feel it, too, the realisation that they had ventured too close to a line that neither of them could cross without consequence.
Nina muttered something under her breath—something that might have been an apology or a self-rebuke—and then she turned on her heel, withdrawing to the bathroom. The sound of running water filled the silence that followed.
Kakashi stood there, his body humming with unspent energy. The thought of following her was a temptation he had to wrestle down, a battle against the pull that had been dragging him toward her all night.
~Nina~
Nina didn't bother shutting the door as she stepped into the bathroom. Her mind was too scattered, her thoughts too muddled to care about modesty. Her hands shook as she reached for the shower taps, twisting them sharply until the water pounded against the tiles, steam rapidly filling the small space.
She braced herself against the edge of the vanity, her knuckles blanching under the pressure. When she finally lifted her gaze to the mirror, the reflection staring back at her felt like a stranger—cheeks flushed, eyes dark with raw, unrestrained hunger.
What the hell am I doing?
The tiles beneath Nina's hands cracked under the strain, but she hardly registered it. She knew the answer. Knew exactly what she was thinking and who she was thinking about.
Through the swirling steam, Kakashi's shadow appeared in the mirror, his reflection drawing nearer with a quiet intensity that made her grip the edge of the vanity even tighter. The steam thickened, gradually obscuring his figure from view, but she could feel him—every part of him—from the warmth of his breath on her neck to the solid strength of his bare chest against her back.
With each round of their cat-and-mouse game, the suppression in Nina's mind weakened, her ever-growing feelings fighting to break through.
"What are we doing?" she asked.
Kakashi didn't answer immediately. His hands moved slowly, first gliding over Nina's front—brushing over her breasts, teasing her nipples until they tightened under his touch, then trailing down her abdomen. "We're here," Kakashi said, his hands continuing their descent, settling on her hips where her dress stubbornly clung. He cinched the fabric, pulling it tight against her skin along with the band of her underwear. The thin material of the g-string she wore offered no protection, pressing cruelly against her most sensitive areas. Kakashi drew Nina closer, his masked lips grazing the shell of her ear as he whispered, "Right here."
If it weren't for the mission they were still technically on, being here like this would have felt wrong.
So very wrong.
But the truth was, this wasn't a mission, and the stakes here weren't professional.
Silently, she cursed. She had stood firm against formidable adversaries and endured missions that pushed her to her limits, but this—
A low, desperate moan escaped Nina as Kakashi's grip intensified. Her breaths were quick and unsteady, her chest constricting with each inhale. She was pinned against the Copy-Nin's experience, learning quickly that no amount of theoretical knowledge could have prepared her for this. He wasn't just pushing her—he was pulling her apart, piece by piece.
"Truce?" Kakashi's voice cut through the thick, humid air. Every syllable was a sharp, taunting command that dared her to surrender.
The tiles beneath Nina's fingers splintered further, tiny cracks spreading like a web. She bit down on her lip, the metallic taste of blood faint but enough—a painful distraction. She shook her head in a terse, jerky motion because the last thing she wanted to do was give in.
Kakashi chuckled softly, the sound dark and knowing. With a deft flick of his wrists, releasing the tension, he stripped Nina bare, her clothing sliding down, gathering in a crumpled heap around her ankles.
"Kakashi…" Nina warned, but she knew the words were hollow, a futile attempt to grasp onto something already lost. There was nothing left to ruin, no invisible line to cross. They had already gone too far, and the boundary that once restrained them had long since disappeared. She tried fervently to convince herself that she could still contain this, keep it from spiralling out of control—but deep down, she knew better.
Unlike the missions where Nina effortlessly slipped in and out of roles, this—the slickness between her thighs, the flush on her skin, the way her body quivered under his touch—was raw and visceral, coursing through her veins at phenomenal speed. The more she willed herself to stop, the more her heart raced away.
"I can hear your heart beating," Kakashi said, his voice impossibly calm. His hand wrapped around hers, lifting it from the vanity and guiding her toward the shower. "Relax."
Nina stepped under the spray first, the hot water hitting her like a shock. It was strange, unfamiliar, to share this space with someone else, especially with him. Behind her, she heard the rustle of fabric as Kakashi undressed, a sound she had never thought would quicken her pulse.
She turned—a purely impulsive move—and looked at him, taking in every detail. His body was a masterpiece of strength and scars, each mark a testament to his life as a shinobi. The play of muscles under his skin, the powerful lines of his thighs and the way his cock hung, already thickening with arousal.
~Kakashi~
Kakashi stood still. He'd never forbidden Sarutobi from looking—there was no need. However, this wasn't the detached, professional look of a medic assessing injuries. For a moment, Kakashi considered removing his mask, a thought that rarely crossed his mind. It felt like an obstacle now, a barrier between them that no longer served its purpose.
But before he could pull it down, Nina reacted. She launched out of the shower, her hand grabbing his wrist, stopping him mid-motion.
Her breath was ragged, and her eyes wide. "Don't." Kakashi hesitated, unsure if this was another one of her traitorous commands. Her wet fingers wrung his wrist. "It'll change things," she added, her voice quieter and more controlled, as if she was trying to force logic into the chaos between them.
Kakashi realised then what Nina was truly asking.
As his fingers left the mask and traced down to the warmth of her cheek, his thumb skated across her lips, capturing the quick, erratic breaths that spilled from them. The shinobi in him calculated every possible outcome and potential fallout, yet the man beneath the mask yearned for something far simpler, far more human.
"Tell me to stop."
Kakashi's words were barely out before they were swallowed by Nina's impassioned response, obliterating any pretence of restraint. The kiss was explosive, unleashing every pent-up emotion and silent yearning they had harboured in a single moment. Even with his mask slightly muffling the fullness of their contact, Kakashi could feel the warmth and softness of her lips, the taste of water mingling with her breath. Everything about it drove him to want more, to take more, his body responding with an urgency he hadn't felt in years.
They broke apart momentarily, gasping for air that the steam around them seemed to steal away. "This can't mean anything," Nina whispered between laboured breaths.
Kakashi knew the consequences— the bet, the rules, the warnings—all looming like a shadow in the back of his mind. Irrelevant. Inconsequential. His grip tightened on the back of Nina's neck, pulling her closer, needing to feel the full force of her against him. His other hand slid down to her hip, fingers digging in, feeling the firmness of her muscles beneath the heated softness of her skin.
Step by step, Kakashi nudged Nina backward, guiding her toward the shower. The water poured down over them, the heat mixing with their own, their skin drenched with water and want.
Sarutobi was unpredictable, and he could feel that edge in her, even now. It wasn't in her nature to relinquish her control. Kakashi knew he'd have to pull it out of her—he didn't know exactly how; he was navigating this just as much as she was. The last thing he wanted was to misstep, so he held back. Not because he wanted to but because he had to. Until she chose to let go.
Kakashi kept his lips just shy of Nina's, the closeness taunting her with every breath. His mouth skimmed along her jaw, dipping to the curve of her neck. She tilted her head, opening the line of her throat to him.
"If you could do anything..." Kakashi whispered into her ear, his nose brushing the shell as he paused "…anything at all." Nina's fingers gripped his shoulders, needing something she couldn't bring herself to ask for. Not yet. Kakashi's lips moved lower, pressing against her pulse point, letting her feel his words just as much as she could hear them. "What would you do?"
Nina's breath caught, fingers threading into his hair, then slipping back to his shoulders, unable to settle. "I'd..."
Kakashi's hand that had been resting on her waist moved upward, exploring, unsure when—if—he'd get a response, but that only heightened his curiosity. His fingers bounced over the ridges of her ribcage, light and patient, waiting for a sign, a shift, anything that would tell him where to push, where to hold back.
Then, his fingertips brushed the underside of her breast. Nina's body jerked, a shrilled gasp tearing from her throat. Kakashi stilled, momentarily taken aback. He'd coaxed all kinds of carnal responses from women before, but this...? He wasn't even sure Nina understood what had just happened.
Nina's forehead dropped against his chest as she fought to pull herself together. "I'd ask you to keep going," she confessed, still breathless.
The hot water beat relentlessly against the back of Kakashi's neck, running down his shoulders and spine. His mask was wet. Every breath took a bit more effort, but he spoke clearly despite it. "Then ask."
Nina didn't lift her head, her forehead still pressed to his chest. Her fingers, curled, slipped down from his shoulders, heavy with the unsaid. Kakashi's breath stalled as she tapped twice—tentative but telling.
Permission.
Her surrender.
~Nina~
Nina kept her head bowed, eyes squeezed shut, refusing to meet Kakashi's eyes. She didn't dare. Her world had shrunk to the sensations around her—the rhythmic patter of water on her skin, the rivulets trailing down her breasts, her abdomen, and pooling between her thighs. Beneath her trembling fingertips, she could feel the steady rise and fall of Kakashi's chest while her own breath faltered, stumbling out of sync with the frantic beat of her heart.
A second, sudden sweep of his fingers under her breast forced her head up. Another sharp inhalation dragged out of her by nothing more than his fingers.
Damn him.
She had forgotten where his hand had been—hadn't realised he'd been carefully holding back this entire time.
Droplets of water sprinkled his skin, his hair a wet mess and his eyes…
Those damned mismatched eyes.
Dark. Unreadable. Filled with the same heated lust pulsing through Nina's own veins, a need so potent it bordered on painful. The evidence of it—impossible to ignore—was pearling between her thighs.
Kakashi's eye gleamed with a predatory light, and he moved even closer, his body a tantalising presence against hers. The unmistakable weight of his arousal pressed against her stomach. He leaned in, his lips so close she could almost taste him, but just before they touched, he pulled back slightly, a teasing smile playing behind his mask.
"Impatient, are we?" he teased, the words drifting through his mask like velvet.
If Hatake wanted her impatient, fine, but Nina would never allow him the last word.
"You're one to talk," she shot back. "Or are you all talk?"
A low, rough sound rumbled from Kakashi's chest. "You should know better than that."
He kissed her gently at first, but as the seconds passed, it deepened, becoming more urgent, more passionate. He walked Nina backward. One… two steps. Until her arse hit the ceramic tiles. She felt herself melting into him. His hands were everywhere, a play of featherlight strokes and firm pressure that left her gasping.
One of his fingers slid between her folds, dragging through her slickness, teasing the sensitive flesh there. It had been too long. Too long since anyone had touched Nina like this, and it wasn't just that. It was the way Kakashi did it. His touch was a slow, methodical torture. He didn't let her take what she wanted—what she thought she needed.
Nina writhed beneath him, her thighs trembling, her hips lifting off the wall as she sought more. He lazily circled her entrance, not yet dipping in. Just there. Nina's hips shifted despite herself, seeking more friction, more pressure—anything.
Kakashi's other hand clamped down on her waist, strong and sure. "Easy." His words were heavy with control, pushing just as forcefully into her skin as the tiles behind her. "You can't rush this."
He eased his first finger inside Nina. Her breath hitched hard, her nails scraping against his chest, leaving faint crescent marks.
It wasn't enough—just one finger wasn't nearly enough.
However, Kakashi didn't give in to the frantic pace Nina's body was begging for. He teased her again, this time letting his finger slide in a little deeper, curling and his thumb ghosting over her clit without enough pressure to offer any relief. She clawed at him, her hands gripping his arms, his shoulders.
Nina hadn't told him she wanted more, but somehow, he understood.
Kakashi plunged a second finger inside her, stretching her, filling her just enough to make her toes curl against the tiles. Her cry was cut off by his mouth on hers. His kiss devoured her moans, whether they were of protest or pleasure. He swallowed them whole, controlling her response with every movement of his hand, never letting her push too far.
He added another finger.
Nina's head lolled back against the shower wall, the intensity both overwhelming and perfect. She could hear herself. Wet. So wet. The embarrassing sound of it filled the small space of the shower, mingling with the water that splattered around them. She tried to fight the flush that burned up her neck.
Kakashi continued to move his fingers slowly, deliberately, as though he had all the time in the world to dismantle her. Nina's legs began to shake, her muscles burning from the effort to keep herself upright. She was so close. So damn close. Her hips bucked again, and this time, he let her, his fingers flexing inside her, brushing against that spot, while the pad of his thumb skimmed over her clit, driving her higher.
Nina cried out, her hands fisting against his chest.
"There it is," Kakashi whispered, his breath hot against her ear. "Stay with me."
When she thought he might give her what she craved, his fingers stilled and withdrew. Nina's body, immediately clenching at the loss, at the emptiness, arched toward him, searching for the release she had been so close to.
"Not yet." Kakashi's lips brushed against her temple, soft and fleeting, as he shifted them out of the shower.
Nina's legs wobbled, her knees threatening to buckle with every step. Her breath still came in shallow gasps, the pounding of her heart a relentless reminder of the release that had been so cruelly denied. The night breeze stirred the curtains, her skin prickled at the temperature shift—still wet from the shower.
Kakashi laid her down on the futon, the soft sheets crinkling beneath her back. As Nina lay there bare, her body aching with unsatisfied need, he didn't let go. His hands never left her, fingers trailing over her flushed skin, still guiding her through this.
The cool fabric of his mask brushed against her skin as he littered her with kisses—her collarbone, her throat, her shoulders—everywhere except her lips.
Kakashi dipped his head to her ear, his breath a warm whisper that sent a shiver down her spine. "I want you to let go."
Nina's heart ached at his words. She had spent so long guarding her heart, afraid to let anyone get too close. She felt tears sting at the corners of her eyes. She wanted to believe him, wanted to let herself be swept away by the torrent of emotions she had kept buried. But the fear was still there, gnawing at the edges of her resolve, keeping her tethered to the walls she had built around her heart.
Kakashi's hands slid lower, working her open again with brutal patience. Stroke by agonising stroke. He was stretching out every second, making her want it more. Need it more.
"Kakashi, I—"
Nina didn't want to say his name. Didn't want to give him the satisfaction of hearing the vulnerability in her voice, but it slipped out anyway. Her voice cracked, the words fading into a whimpering mewl. She didn't know what she was asking for, but he did.
Kakashi always knew.
His lips descended on hers in a deep, consuming kiss, claiming the last of her breath. To resist him now would be senseless and … self-destructive. If she had to, she'd just have to. But his proposition… it was a sensual timbre offering to end the deafening roar searing deep within her.
Fuck.
Her entire body quaked, her fingers clutching the sheets like a lifeline, her back arching off the futon as her release tore through her. It was as if all the pent-up emotions—her humanness—had finally found an outlet.
~Kakashi~
Kakashi hadn't expected it to be like this, Nina, yielding so wholly, her unspoken trust allowing him to lead, holding her together while she fell apart beneath him. Guiding her through every shudder, every tremor, until the pleasure finally began to ebb, leaving her gasping for breath, her body limp and shivering beneath him.
That kind of trust...
Kakashi's eyes lingered on the soft rise and fall of Nina's chest, her body now spent, limbs slack against the sheets. She was peaceful, her mind and body sated. But him? He was anything but. The desire he'd been holding back, the one he had kept so carefully reined in, was now impossible to ignore.
Kakashi slipped away, his footsteps nearly silent as he made his way back to the bathroom. The sound of the water still running provided the perfect cover. He stepped under the still-warm spray of the shower.
With his hand wrapped tightly around the shaft of his cock, he stroked himself slowly. A shaky breath snaked past his lips as his eyes fluttered closed, savouring the way his body reacted to the mental images he conjured up. Never before had he let himself do this with his mind filled with her. With…
Nina.
The last time had been a disaster. The guilt had been immediate—crushing, suffocating the moment Kakashi's thoughts had turned to her. He had stopped, the disgusting shame for letting his mind wander so far churning in his gut.
But tonight, there was no guilt. No shame. Kakashi was free.
A low groan escaped his throat, unbidden, as his thumb brushed over the sensitive spot on the underside of the head of his cock. His hips rolled forward. Once. Twice. He fucked his hand roughly, his strokes growing frantic. His other hand braced against the warm tiles, his fingers flexing against the smooth surface as he fought to keep his balance. His breath came in short, ragged pulls, the muscles in his abdomen contracting as the pressure mounted with every rapid movement of his wrist.
A violent shudder ripped up Kakashi's spine as his climax hit, leaving him shuddering against the wall. Each pulse wracking his body as he spilled into his hand.
"Kami..."
Kakashi stood there, chest heaving, hand still loosely wrapped around himself. The release, though powerful, left him feeling both fulfilled and strangely empty, a bittersweet satisfaction lingering in its wake. It had been so long since he'd allowed himself to feel this—allowed himself to want something, someone, this deeply.
After rinsing his hand, Kakashi turned off the shower and dried himself with a towel. Returning to the room, he found Nina already buried beneath the covers, breathing deeply in the steady rhythm of sleep.
Kakashi carefully joined her, her hair loose and spilling across the pillow, brushing against his arm as he slipped one hand beneath her head, the other naturally circling her waist. Nina stirred slightly, seemingly instinctively nestling closer into him. He pressed a soft kiss to the top of her head, her scent—florals and faint vanilla—enveloping him like a calming balm.
Whatever the morning would bring, Kakashi didn't care. Right now, he'd simply enjoy this for what it was: a night where they weren't alone. Where the sheets felt warm and soft and where Nina was safe within his arms. The two of them tucked away from the world.
~End of Chapter~
