CHAPTER 5: THE TRUTH

Initially, Mewtwo was surprised by AI's decision to choose a gender for itself; yet once he had grown used to the idea, he came to view the act as a milestone in its – or now her - maturing psyche. No matter that it had been Kamaria who had suggested the change; he was still impressed with the program's decision. True, Mewtwo suspected that his creation had come to look up to the female as a sister-like figure - an onee-san - and might have done anything the creature thought to be a positive idea, but he never spoke about the matter with AI. After all, he had learned well in the past that even as a newborn, AI's mind was very much her own. As a result, he would not invade it.

Meanwhile, his other companion continued to be a source of deeply rooted frustration. As was becoming annoyingly repetitious, his attempts to reach out to her were futile, being rejected each time no matter what approach he took. Though she wore the pumpellyite bracelet he had given her – which, he was at least pleased to discover, suited her well – she seemed by far more distant than she'd ever been before. To an extent, he understood why this was…but he had never seriously wanted, nor had he made any motions, to join with her in body. Mating, to him, was not even a subject he was comfortable discussing when it veered out of the realm of scientific facts. Yet in one sole incident his body had betrayed his mind, and that revolted him thoroughly. It seemed that AI had been correct: he did indeed crave the other feline. However, for the sake of his desired friendship with her, Mewtwo denied the yearnings he felt for her form at times.

Still, if in complete honesty to himself, he was not precisely certain what he wanted; no amount of pondering on the situation he was in gave him any answers. Fortunately, not all of those hours musing had been spent in vain: the male clone had come to some vague, even obvious, realizations: he cherished Kamaria's rare smiles and her uncommon laughter…and he loathed seeing how those expressions of happiness would fleetly vanish as soon as she saw him.

Eventually matters reached something of a turning point. There had been nothing within the day itself that had indicated the approaching shift: the felines had played their usual game of cat-and-mouse, their observer had made more than a few exasperated comments, and the weather and the local neighbors had remained as indifferent as in the weeks prior. The pursuit-and-dodging campaign placed in neutral for the sake of the evening meal, Mewtwo had joined Kamaria in the dining cavern for one of their simple dinners: a bit of fresh fruit, perhaps some dried meat and vegetables. After being shunned so long, he probably could have predicted the response she gave him – her snarling of sarcastic comments about his motives in eating with her. All the same, it got under his fur, especially when he considered that the entire island had been his home for quite some time, not hers. So, quite frankly sick of her foul treatment, he glared at her and growled right on back:

"What precisely have I done to you, Kamaria, that makes you hate me so? Liberated you from Giovanni? Given you a home without asking for anything in return? Tried to be a kind companion? Ah, wait…those are the things farthest from what might make you despise me! Tell me, what crime have I committed against you that merits such scathing treatment?"

Previously, the other clone had never answered his inquiries, instead merely choosing one of his more recent mistakes to turn against him, as she did now. "Well, you have tried to get up inside of me-"

He ignored that, lashing out a rebuke. "You have despised me ever since the first day you saw me – why is that? What did you conclude about me before I even had a chance to speak to you? Do you think I saved you for the right to make you mine?" The older psychic laughed at that, his chuckling drenched in bitterness. "Are you truly so stubborn as to refuse to believe otherwise? By god, Kamaria, you are one of the coldest creatures I have ever encountered. Even AI is warmer than you, and she is not made of flesh and blood! So if I, by some strange set of circumstances, did wish for a partner, there is nothing beyond your pretty form that would attract me to you."

"That is enough for most!"

He bristled. "But I am not a simple animal! Let us make this perfectly clear, female: your body and your mind may intrigue me, but your harsh heart and your unyielding soul do not. I do not want you as a mate!"

His eyes narrowed then as he regarded her. "On the other hand, you seem to savor arousing my anger…you came to me, desiring to fight-"

She immediately saw where he was going with that, and her face contorted with chagrin. "Wha - Mewtwo, I don't…I do not secretly imagine screwing with you. That's not why I – good god, don't flatter yourself with such ridiculous imagery-"

"Then we are in agreement!" he hissed, cutting her off. "So why-"

"THE ONLY REASON I'M ALIVE IS FOR YOU!"

Mewtwo's reaction was severe: he recoiled from her, his stunned expression aptly convey his sudden confusion. His brow furrowed as he took her declaration in. "What…?"

What did she mean by that?

Seeing his response, Kamaria laughter became acidic to the mind. Finally, after months, she would answer his questions. "Come now; surely you guessed that my purpose here was to tempt you back over to Giovanni's side again? Mewtwo, if it hadn't been that man's lust for your power, I would not exist…I would not be alive. AI, at the very least, must have realized that…I would have thought she'd have told you, instead of keeping you in the dark."

Kamaria had walked around the table to stand before him, and even though he was taller than she was, he felt as if she was staring down her muzzle at him somehow, like an insect that had crawled into her sheets. As he listened, his previously keen fury shifted into horror as she revealed, finally, all the things she'd kept hidden from his knowledge. Her eyes glazed over as she described the events surrounding her unlikely life and why it had been formed. "Or course, Giovanni had larger plans than for me than simply using me as a bargaining chip…and ideally, those plans were supposed to have been kept from me. And they were, at least initially; I heard nothing of what my tasks would be beyond thievery and acting a spy. For the gift of life, I was willing to commit those criminal acts easily enough…after all, I was dealing with items and information, not lives. Furthermore, I had compensation: my own home, a caring teacher, and enough freedom to be content with the hand I'd been dealt. I never once saw myself as being used by anyone. After all, my Ali treated me as an equal; he taught me about the world, urged me to explore what I could…he went so far as to help me understand my powers and when I went into heat. You know, I knew about you by the first time I hit estrus, and you intrigued me, frankly. I even dreamed of you, Mewtwo…Ali looked so sad when I told him that. I suppose that was inevitable though: he knew precisely why I'd been created…and when Giovanni decided to come after you, I discovered the reason behind my conception too."

"Giovanni could have simply used me to replace you…I could have fought just as well against his enemies! But no…no, my purpose was not merely to bind you to Team Rocket again, but to also please you afterwards! I was supposed to be your personal whore…I was supposed to just lay back and let you do whatever the hell you wanted with me! I was supposed to do every little thing I could to keep you fully satisfied with your life in the organization…!"

Understandably, these declarations made Mewtwo feel sickened. Yes; somewhere deep within him mind, he had suspected this, but he had refused to consider the notions as plausible. Yet here was the truth, just as gruesome as he had hoped it would never be. To add to an already disturbing set of ideas, Kamaria had not even finished her explanations yet. "As if that weren't foul enough…as if that weren't already cruel…I was told that in the event that I conceived…if I made a child with you…that I would not even be able to keep my own baby. Oh, I might, might, have been able to breastfeed the infant, for the health advantages it would provide, but afterwards? Whether I consented or not, the baby would have been taken away after it had been weaned, to be raised by a bunch of uncaring humans. I would never get to see it again…or if I did, I would hardly be able to look at my child with any parental pride. It would take time, but Giovanni would ensure that any offspring I might have would be molded into another one of his soulless soldiers. Hell, if I had multiples, he would have his own little set of shock-troopers…I haven't a doubt that he'd have made them so inured to violence that they'd come to lack hearts…."

She seemed to struggle out of her personal mire of remembered despair in order to meet his eyes. "Giovanni…he treated me well enough except when it came to that; and to you! Apparently, I had no choice in any of this…even when I argued, even when I fought for myself, I was restrained and silenced. I was told that I was being ridiculous…according to him, my tasks were easy."

"But…but still, I would never know what it meant to choose and love my own mate - I would never get to raise a family with him! There would only be you in my life! Maybe my desire for joy was a blessing I didn't deserve, considering what I am, and considering all the other things I had already been given…but I wanted the choice, damn it!"

Her paws clenched into fists, while her body trembled. "And you…just by existing, you took that from me! I hate you because of what you meant to my life, and what you would potentially make me: a prostitute, whose body was no longer hers to own; and a mother with no children."

There it was; summed up in one weary sentence was the cause of all her resentment and rage…and Mewtwo would admit that it was a potent reason indeed. Now he could clearly see why she felt the way she did; and in that moment he desired to turn away in forfeit, to go silently to his quarters in defeat. How could he possibly fight her words? And yet, he was not the monster she painted him to be! He needed say that now; he needed to defend himself, for the sake of any future bond they might - by some small chance - come to share, regardless of this other "life" they might have had together. "…Do you honestly believe that I would have gone along with his plans, Kamaria? Do you truly think that I would have raped you, and then let that man steal away any children that might have come from our union?"

The female shivered, unable to look him in the face anymore, for once seeming terribly fragile. "Our desires, or the lack thereof, would not have mattered once I went into heat…you wouldn't have even been able to avoid me, because we would have been forced to live in the same dwelling area. At that close of proximity, resistance would have been hard for either of us at best. As well, no matter how devoted or protective you might have been for them, the infants still would have been lost to us. You probably would have been sent away, and they would have been shipped off to a place where we could never find them."

"…You are telling me that Giovanni desired to ensnare us both in false affection and in mere obligation?" he surmised.

"Something to that effect, yes…he even had a backup plan if you refused to save me by giving up your freedom."

She seemed reluctant to go on…but then, with a twisted grin on her face that smiled at nothing, she answered his silent inquiry: "After all, would you refuse not only to help another of your species, but a pregnant female at that? Could you be so stubborn and dishonorable?"

So much about Kamaria's very existence and her past shook Mewtwo…but this was enough to nearly make him stagger, though he locked his muscles against any sudden feelings of weakness. His eyes automatically dropped to her abdomen, which showed no outward signs of bearing stirring life…yet from the expression of both pain and desperate joy on Kamaria's face, he comprehended that what she had said was not a lie. The entirety of her disclosure was too much for a single being to bear in one short night. From a distance, he noted that he'd asked her who the father was, as if more information somehow mattered. His thorough mind was running on an analytical track, unable to do anything else in order to deal with all that she'd told him.

"It doesn't really matter…the entire event of conception was the result of an artificial union of gametes. I am still a virgin, Mewtwo, just as I suspect you are. I have a scar from where they cut into me to take what they needed for my side in the donation. They started giving me drugs to prepare my body for the unnatural pregnancy – they told me they were vitamins, of all things. The operation was done a couple weeks before Giovanni and his forces came here, dragging me along. I found out that the experiment had succeeded only a few days prior to when we met."

Yes; she remembered Giovanni's words well, recalled the feeling of his hard, accursed hand against her naval….

"Congratulations, Kamaria - you are going to be a mother."

The despair of that moment, however, could not compare to the desperate hope that had come with her freedom. Smiling to herself, she touched her abdomen, extending her senses downwards and inside, able to feel the tiny yet strong life growing in her womb. Mewtwo watched this in a form of stricken, maybe even appalled fascination, feeling no wonder at what – to some people – might be considered a full-fledged miracle. Kamaria saw his expression, and her happiness swiftly shut down, her mood turning cool once more. "This baby…it's mine, Mewtwo. I won't let anyone separate me from it…and I certainly won't let you touch my child. It would probably be for the best if you refrain from intervening with my life again, do you understand?"

She left him behind then, not staying to hear his response. Within the boundaries of her mind, she forced everything into simplicity: finally, she had a chance to be happy, a chance to love unconditionally, and she in him she saw the potential threat of an unknown variable. Her progeny was all she had that was solely her own, and it would be enough for her…but if she lost it, then what could she do with her life? As she shivered beneath her downy fur, her refusal to let Mewtwo near her intensified. How could she allow anyone potentially harmful hold her child, or let his fingers grace its unsullied fur?

She attempted to pay no heed to the tiny voice within her that told her to consider otherwise; that suggested that she was being horribly unfair for holding crimes that Mewtwo might never have committed over his head. She tried to ignore this soft, yet insistent voice; to ignore the male's own evident, unwavering kindness, and the pain that she had seen in his eyes when she had refused to accept him. Yet most of all, she wanted to ignore all the lies she continuously had to keep telling herself in order to function.

Because the truth, she knew, was that no matter what either of them might say…they cared for one another. In her case, this was in the most minimal of ways, and yet…well, as she had mentioned before, she had dreamed of him in past times. Now, after they had finally met, she found that regardless of what she tried to make herself believe, he was proving a dream. This was her final defense, the truths she had shared; they were the last thing she could throw up between them to resist the reasoning that they could have a good, whole bond, if only given the chance. Presently, the female was deeply frightened…and as a result, she had felt the need to throw into the open all her secrets. Kamaria hoped desperately that these facts might continue to aid her in denying his friendship….

If they couldn't, then things would undoubtedly change…and above all else, Kamaria feared what that change could mean for her and her little one. At last she had some control over her own live…and the idea that the bond between Mewtwo and she could deepen to unknown levels shook her. After all, with some sorrow she understood that even if Mewtwo did not regard her as a possible mate, he still considered her his match, in more ways than merely in body and in mind. There was a subtle difference between the two types of pairings, but she comprehended those differences well enough, as he did. Yet there was a precariously thin line between being a match, and in being a friend or lover…and by god, the potentials unsettled her. She wanted certainties!

Yet with him…with him, she only found their opposite.

"Did you know?"

It was a question Mewtwo found he needed to pose to AI, despite being sure of what her answer would be.

His creation responded to him quietly, as if being careful to avoid setting him off. "Yes, I knew. I found out about her condition when I gave her the first medical scans to assess her health. When she began to have morning sickness, I advised her to tell you, but she refused to listen to me. She is now about four months along…I will confess that I'm surprised you didn't sense the fetus yourself. Soon it will begin to make Kamaria show. If she had not told you now, you likely would have guessed within a matter of weeks."

The electronic entity suddenly seemed to realize something. "You are very upset."

"Why did you refrain from telling me?" He chose to disregard her previous statement. There was no point in confirming what was so evident: he felt old, hollowed out, as if he were an empty husk….

"I thought she may have wanted to keep it a secret – I was right. Had I told you, it would have meant a breach in her privacy, and that is something you always taught me to respect. Besides, the odds were in favor of her telling you herself."

He glared up at the sky through his window, feeling the cold from outside holding him firm, invading him deep inside his core…. "How very honorable of you, AI…but you still lack the concept of empathy. If you had…no, you are very much an analytical creature, just as you were always meant to be. As of such, you do not feel…or at the very least, this all cannot be easy for you to understand."

He received no answer from the unseen protector. She knew that it was not words he needed now…no, the cures for his turmoil were intangible items, ones of time and space. If she could comprehend nothing else, it was that his healing was something only he could do. As much as she might wish to, she could not help him now…at least, not like this. As of such, she remained silent - there was nothing left to say.