Disclaimer: Nothing belongs to me beyond the words that make up this story, except the characters of course (although there are some of my own).
Warning: First, I clarify that as this is a fictional story, none of the rites mentioned here are intended to represent either Shintoism or Japanese culture as such to the letter, I am not seeking to offend anyone or their culture in any way. Second, there will be a couple of scenes with sensitive content, read at your discretion.
"The secrets we keep: Yumi"
1864
Yumi entered the altar as soon as Himura left.
She waited patiently after her talk with the previous Guji for the crew to finish cleaning up the mess left behind. Unconscious priests and acolytes and more than one with obvious bruise-type wounds, which showed that - although Himura had not drawn his sword - the young samurai had not held back.
Yumi understood, of course, the boy was heartbroken, and his chest was burning with all the promises that had suddenly vanished. The woman felt much more than guilty. The Guji's words echoed in her mind again...
"You have to leave. As soon as Kaoru dono receives recognition from His Highness the Emperor, you will have to leave the shrine."
The brunette pressed her hands on the fabric of the hakama, clear evidence of her feelings. Perhaps she would have sunk into her own sadness if it were not for the fact that she was aware that there were others with a worse fate than hers.
The light of the lamp flickered then, Yumi directed her eyes towards the fusuma where one of her new acolytes, a chokkai who survived the siege and who had been in Kaede's service, was waiting for her to receive him.
"Come in." Yumi said.
The fusuma moved around, revealing the young woman of no more than fifteen years old; her white complexion looked grayish, her brown eyes were splashed with red from the lack of rest and the excess of previously shed tears, her black hair was still disheveled; evidently she had not had a chance to recover like the rest.
"Yumi sama, I have brought what is necessary, and the bathroom has been prepared," she informed her.
Yumi sighed tiredly. She had fired the previous Guji not long ago, but it was already morning, and it was better to get it over with soon.
"We'll have to wake her up," she said, standing up.
They both left the rest house and headed towards the altar of the goddess Inari, where the newly crowned miko resided. It was a small group that still stood guard around the altar on the outside; the few that were left that Yumi knew were trustworthy. Although perhaps it would be fair to say that after the siege, everyone sought refuge in their companions, as though they were aware that they would not survive otherwise.
When the brunette entered the altar, she was surprised to find the miko alone; a part of her had hoped for Himura's return, even if she knew the impossibility of such a wish. The brunette approached her protégé and began to shake her gently.
"Kaoru dono." She called her. "Kaoru dono."
The girl shuddered, and in that shake Yumi appreciated the trail of tears on the skin of her face; she was even able to perceive the pain and fatigue in the little girl's body. But above all, she noticed that her innocence prevailed.
Himura had kept his word.
"Ne, Kaoru dono..."
The girl's eyes finally opened after blinking, two blue stars whose brightness had diminished. When her gaze fell on her superior's eyes, however, it was not a greeting that left her lips, but a question.
"Kenshin?" she whispered, voice hoarse.
Yumi's heart tightened in her chest, and then, she shook her head twice.
Kaoru looked away sadly, it was evident in the trembling of her lower lip that she felt like crying.
"Gomenasai... I shouldn't..." the girl whispered with difficulty due to the lump she felt in her throat, emotions stuck in her chest.
Silent tears ran down her cheeks.
Yumi then approached and helped her get up until she was sitting - not without some difficulty - kneeling in front of her, she spoke to her with infinite tenderness.
"On the contrary, little girl, you deserve the right to cry," she said, caressing her face. "Even more so now after what's coming."
The young miko's heart jumped in alarm, her eyes flickering in confusion.
Only then did the little girl notice Sasaki's presence in the room behind Yumi. The brunette carried a basket with towels and other tools. Behind both of them two other chokkai were waiting and, in the background, right at the entrance, Kaoru could see the silhouette of one more chokkai through the shoji that separated the hall from the altar.
"Is... something else happening?" She questioned with fear.
Yumi walked away a little, withdrawn into herself; this only alerted the brunette even more, who felt her heart tremble in her chest.
"The Maekkai has been intervened in its efforts to conceive a child of the gods, thanks to Himura kun," Yumi told her. "However, this does not mean they will give up in their attempts to achieve it. But... After the presentation..."
The heat left the young blue-eyed miko's body, her body shivered at the sensation of cold that ran through her then.
"Kenshin no... he couldn't..." The brunette choked on the words because a part of her finally understood how far the young samurai had gotten involved and how much he had hidden from her, at the same time that she wanted to defend him. "Why is this a problem?"
The eldest sighed, it could be seen the fatigue and effort that this represented.
"You still have two days for your purification; in that period, if there has not been some intervention, they will undoubtedly try again during the presentation to the emperor. And I'm afraid Himura kun won't be able to help us by then. -Yumi explained hurriedly-. Do you understand what I'm saying? Although we can protect you for now, once you arrive in front of the high priest you will have to prove your communion with your kami."
"My goddess is Inari." Kaoru refuted, somewhat offended, although she clearly did not fully understood what was being told to her.
"You pronounced two names." Yumi declared to the surprise of her protégé. "And you should have received communion if not for the chosen kami but for your gift. Not presenting any trademark, in your case and in our context, would be the same as saying that you had been repudiated."
Fear.
The girl felt such fear that the need to flee overwhelmed her to the core; Her eyes, her entire body were looking for an exit... an exit in the form of a samurai with red hair and violet-blue eyes. A door that, she remembered, had closed with her cornation.
"I could... I could use my period blood," she proposed, her voice trembled.
"Oh, little bird." Yumi lamented sadly, as did the other chokkai present. Their expressions of sadness and sorrow were daggers of ice that stabbed into the minor's back and chest.
"Nani? (what?)" She asked with a trembling voice, with the mark of her fear and her immediate crying.
None of her companions spoke, not because they did not want to calm the fears and doubts of the youngest, but because they did not have words of comfort and facing such sadness on the face of the newly crowned miko made them feel guilty to a certain extent. One more thorn in Yumi's heart, without a doubt, since both she and her predecessors had neglected to prepare the youngest, the three of them confident that the result would have been different.
It was Sasaki in the end, who ended up answering her.
"You have stopped bleeding Kaoru dono." She told her sadly.
The girl's eyes widened in surprise and anguish.
"You hadn't even realized." Yumi declared with painful surprise.
Kaoru continued searching for another possible solution, her eyes looking in various directions.
"Should I... make a cut then?" She proposed.
On occasions, when a maiden's virginity had been compromised, some young girls were allowed to pretend to have bled, making the cut in the leg, and even using the blood of some animal.
"Kaoru dono." Yumi lamented. Then she shook her head emphatically. She approached her and took her by the shoulders, drawing her in, fixing her gaze on her own. When she had her attention, the brunette caressed her face. "Listen to me. In your position, you will be checked. If you still retain your virtue by then, there will be a second intervention after your presentation to the emperor. Maybe today, we can pretend, but it will be a wasted effort later."
"We would only prolong the inevitable, Kaoru dono." Sasaki completed, cutting off the words that had wanted to make their way to Kaoru's lips. The young woman had also approached, moved by the feelings of anguish so clear on her companion's face. Even more so after knowing herself the pain of being violated...
Kaoru looked from one to the other, while the heat slowly left her body.
"What should I do then?" She asked.
"Trust us." Yumi asked, taking her in her arms and lifting her with her.
Even if she didn't tell her in words, the minor already knew, internally, what would have to be done. So she did not resist even if every cell in her body screamed for her to do so, to fight, to flee...
"Will it hurt?" She questioned not without fear, letting herself be carried away by the older woman towards the ready tub, full of hot water belonging to the onsen.
The crowned miko suddenly felt like she was navigating through a confusing dream, one that little by little was painted with sadness and a certain alarm, but that did not end up completely turning into a nightmare. She saw without looking, without noticing the movements of her companions and noticing things only until they were in front of her.
"Let's hope not for long. -Yumi begged, unable to lie to her. -Come, little one. We better start soon," she said, turning her towards her as soon as they were in front of the tub.
Between the two of them, Sasaki and Yumi, they began to assist the youngest. They undressed her down to her underwear, only opening the haneri until the minor had entered the tub along with both young women, still lost in a trance. Yumi in front of her, Sasaki hugged her from behind, holding her.
"The water will help reduce the pain, Kaoru dono." The one with chocolate eyes told her as she caressed her partner's arms up and down in a clear attempt to get her to relax, although without much success.
Kaoru trembled. And then she began to hiccup.
"Hush, little bird. You're in good hands." Yumi told her, hugging her torso. Her hands began to caress the little girl at the height of her hips, as if she wanted to infuse her with heat above that possessed by the onsen water.
"What should I do?" Kaoru asked, although to no one in particular.
Yumi leaned her towards herself, the youngest almost slipped. After a small struggle, Kaoru rested her head on her superior's left shoulder; Sasaki then caressed her forehead and left her hand there afterwards, then kissed the girl's cheek.
"Try to relax," she told her. "It will hurt more if you stay tense." She explained.
Kaoru closed her eyes, new tears emerging and threatening to fall despite her owner's efforts to contain them. Her breathing became irregular... Sasaki tried to comfort her through her hug. "Think of something beautiful," she asked.
Kaoru shook her head, eyes tightly squeezed. The girl felt Yumi discover the area between her legs while trying to caress her carefully, as if trying to put effort and affection into the touch just so as not to hurt her...
"I don't know what I should imagine" Lamented the brunette. Her heart was beating uncontrollably and she had begun to sweat for a reason other than the heat produced by the water.
"Think of Himura kun." Sasaki whispered to her, making her partner's heart skip a beat.
The image of the swordsman hastily formed in the girl's mind. A figure in the distance under the sun, at the foot of the Tori. There was a warmth that the blue-eyed priestess wanted to recover as she saw him in the distance, immersed in the cold of abandonment.
Yumi's hands spread her legs; her right hand invaded the little girl's privacy and began to stimulate her.
Kaoru jumped scared, and was about to separate. But Sasaki was quick to hold her in her embrace, trying with desperate anguish to physically convey the affection she felt for her. She rocked her body as she hugged her, holding the child's face against her left shoulder. Her voice a soft melody that helped her distract herself from the invasion on her body.
"Think about Himura kun, Kaoru," she ordered again in a sweet voice. "In your Kenshin."
The youngest stifled a cry. Taking a deep breath the vision came back to her.
Kenshin was waiting for her, standing under the Tori. She was walking towards him. With his gaze still on the city, he smiled before even turning to see her. He always knew when she was around.
"In the shine of his eyes, in the smile he always gives you..." Sasaki continued, guiding her through that dream. Her words and her comfort little by little made it possible for the girl to finally relax. She allowed herself to be stimulated by her companion and soon granted access to that invasion.
"Go to him, Kaoru," Sasaki told her, aware that this was about to end; nodding towards Yumi, she tightened her hug without becoming uncomfortable. "Draw him through your memories. Think about him... The way he pronounces your name..."
"Kaoru dono" Kenshin spoke in her vision.
And instantly she felt the heat hurt her center. A burning cut that hit her walls.
"Aah...!" The miko shouted.
"Hush little one, just a little more." Yumi asked her.
The vision began to fade... in its place the tears were let out quickly, the pain came out through crying, the miko who clung tightly to Sasaki's arm that held her below the shoulders; fighting against herself not to get away from the grievance she was suffering until it was over.
"Kaoru dono..." Her companion spoke desperately to her, with tears equally penetrating her chest. "Remember, all those shared moments; the reason why you decided to surrender to the sanctuary."
The youngest squirmed in the grip; Yumi invaded her until she bled.
"Aah...!"
"That's it... It's done." Declared the eldest. "Sasaki," she ordered.
The aforementioned nodded, with a movement of her head she called another of the chokkai present, who hurriedly cleaned the blood on a cloth that looked like cotton. Sasaki sighed once everything was over. Letting herself fall fully into the tub, she submerged herself with her partner until she was covered up to her chest, both of them lying in that space that suddenly felt very small.
"It's over, Kaoru sama... This is enough." She told her in a soft voice without stopping hugging her.
Yumi, unable to see such a scene, hurried towards the chokkai, who now bore the seer's mark of innocence. Taking her shoulder, she walked with her to the anteroom.
"You already know what to do. Once it is ready, give it to Sato." Yumi ordered.
The chokkai nodded.
"Yes, Yumi sama."
The chokkai left in the company of another companion. Yumi took the opportunity to fix her clothes, unable to look behind herself but also unable to leave the room. Behind her she continued to hear the words of comfort that Sasaki kept murmuring to the youngest. Words that she herself would have liked to have.
"Embrace the feeling, Kaoru sama." Sasaki told her while Kaoru remained lying on her. "Cry what you have to cry. There is no shame in tears... you have been reborn today."
Yumi closed her eyes. She felt like vomiting.
"I'm sorry, little one." She murmured in a low voice, almost inaudible, a muffled lament. "I'm so sorry..."
Two days later, when the altar preparations had been completed to receive the new priestess, Kaoru appeared before Yumi asking for advice. She could see in the severity of her gaze that she was still grieving.
Yumi barely managed to hold her gaze.
"I bled again..." The girl declared once her superior questioned the reason for her visit. "It is normal?"
The brunette couldn't help but smile sadly.
"It is. -She answer-. Your bleeding must have stopped due to the shock you suffered during the attack on the sanctuary. And having broken the mark of your virtue, it may have stimulated you again. -She explained, and then asked before she could stop herself. "Does it hurt too much?"
The girl shook her head, unable to pronounce words; the pain was reflected in her blue orbs for a second and Yumi managed to see it.
"Do not lie." She ordered her.
Kaoru frowned in discomfort and sorrow, but finally spoke.
"I don't know what hurts me more. Whether my body or my soul." She said.
Yumi's hands balled into fists, until her fingernails dug into her own flesh.
"Master Takani will visit you today. -She said, looking away from her until then protegee -Take advantage and ask him all your questions, don't feel sorry; he is a decent man and has known you since before entering the sanctuary."
"He will see me like you did." Kaoru lamented.
"It is necessary, little one. -Yumi reminded him. -Although you are not yet an adult woman, you are no longer a child." She declared.
Those last words brought new tears to the young miko's eyes.
...
But even if she had every reason to cry anyway, Yumi couldn't allow herself to shed any tears. Knowing herself as guilty as she was, just like her late companions - and taking into account that the plan concocted by them had to be followed until the end... - No. Yumi did not have the right to cry. Not yet, at least.
The former Guji Jineh would continue his crusade to eradicate those responsible for the fate of the Inari Shrine, Katsura would continue with his rebellion plans, the Shinsengumi would continue hunting the rebels, and the world would continue turning long after she and everyone else died. But before that, she had to finish what she had started.
Holding on to her own sadness and pain inflicted by her own guilt, Yumi forced herself to be strong and let others mourn for her for now.
It was thus that hours before formally handing the miko over to her sacred confinement, she had seen fit to meet with the leader of the Chosu clan, who, after the recent murders, had remained a recluse with the intention of avoiding suspicions being raised about him. But it was a matter of time before he went into hiding after declaring himself an enemy of the shogunate.
Both, he and Shinsaku, and the former's bodyguard, met her in the wooded area surrounding the retreat building.
"Himura gave up his intention to join us." Katsura declared; his annoyance was evident in each of his words. It was clear how dissatisfied he was after having achieved such a feat only for the redhead to end up refusing him once again.
However, Yumi was unfazed by his words.
"It was to be expected." She declared easily as if it were the most obvious thing. "The boy is not someone with a corrupt heart. He just wanted justice."
Katsura frowned. His bodyguard, on the other hand, snorted in amusement.
"It also served our cause," Shinsaku, who feared a conflict, was quick to say. "That intervention has been a fairly strong blow to the shogunate, and has allowed the uprising of other clans, mainly in the south." He reminded them. "Not to mention we were able to free previous patriots, in addition to recovering the port."
To his good fortune, Katsura nodded, although he still didn't look satisfied.
"But it's still not enough for you, right?" Yumi inquired. "I'm afraid I no longer have any machinations that can convince Himura kun to join you. If you haven't achieved it by now, I doubt you can achieve it at all."
"But your promise remains." Katsura asked.
Yumi nodded.
"It is a vow that I cannot break. It's the reason I'm here too." She recognised. Then she said in a blunt voice "I will leave the sanctuary."
That generated diverse reactions in the three men, but everyone shared the surprise.
"To prevent accusations and repercussions from falling on the sanctuary, I will leave as the person responsible. -The miko explained. -I will offer my honor in the place of my companions. But I'm not going to stay in line."
Shinsaku smiled in amusement, as did Katsura's bodyguard, Shishio.
"Oh... Looks like we have a little warrior."
Katsura, after analyzing her for a moment, nodded.
"We have a deal then."
"Once the war is over, if the rebel side is the winner, the priestesses will be relegated to assistants. And they will only be able to attend to Shintoism of their own free will. Any political power they previously possessed will be null and void -Yumi declared. -Including Kaoru sama's. ...The tradition of the "child of the gods", therefore, will also be eradicated."
After defining the plan and the actions to follow they hurriedly said goodbye. Yumi had to return with the sanctuary's entourage to hand over her protégé. However, Katsura's bodyguard, the same samurai who received her at the inn where the rebels were hiding, approached her after having looked at her in detail, apparently trying to understand her.
"I don't understand you." He told her as soon as he was in front of her. "In your place you have honor, pride and power. Why give it up?" He questioned. For someone who sought to stand out above everyone as the strongest it made no sense to abandon the right to such a position with such strong political power.
Yumi smiled at him amused.
"Make no mistake, ronin. -She warned him. -That honor and power you speak of is nothing more than a facade. As women, even if we are revered, we are just puppets. I seek to have power in my hands through my own means. I am not going to settle for crumbs."
The woman's gaze denoted such strength and determination that, after having debated with her, the man ended up granting her that small victory.
"I understand." He told her after smiling half-way, he looked satisfied. "It's good to see that you're not weak." He tempted her.
"What about you?" She challenged.
And Sishio's smile only grew.
Yumi watched them leave with a bittersweet taste in her mouth.
"Kaoru" She thought to herself. "I just hope that when you understand what we really did... that you may forgive us."
...
Hours later, the entourage from the Inari sanctuary, together with the representatives of the imperial priests, appeared in front of the private altar to the goddess Inari, where Kaoru would do her six-month period of seclusion in service to her. The Aizu and Kiyosato clans crews were already waiting for them outside the place.
After the respective processions and bows, Yumi handed over her until then protégé.
"Kaoru miko sama comes to retreat and commune with his chosen kami." She declared.
Shinji, who had been declared the official heir of the first branch of his clan, was at the head of the guard party, and responded to the words of the senior miko.
"The Kiyosato clan, together, with the Aizu clan, receive her and join in their mission to protect her." He declared.
Yumi shared a meaningful look with the young man.
"I put her in your hands, Shinji kun."
The boy nodded.
"I'll take care of her. You don't have to worry, Yumi sama." He responded, hand on the handle of his katana.
Following the event to the letter, the young crowned miko prepared to say goodbye to her superior. Standing in front of her, the eldest could not help but admire her and feel proud of the young woman. Adorned in her ceremonial dress and with ornaments in her hair, the blue-eyed young woman seemed more like a divine and ethereal vision; a small doll made flesh. The little makeup she wore denoted the features that had gradually become sharper.
The brunette felt enveloped in an immeasurable longing. Feeling moved and distressed at the same time, she was unable to prevent the words that came out of her mouth then.
"You would have been such a beautiful bride." She lamented.
If those words had hurt Inari's miko, she did not show it. On the contrary, she seemed reluctant to show any emotion, and for the first time, it was Yumi who cried instead of her. She covered her face with one hand, hurriedly wiping away her tears. "Sorry. I should not have said that."
The brunette barely nodded. She bowed properly and prepared to leave, when Yumi stopped her again.
"Kaoru," she called, getting her to stop.
Yumi searched through the sleeves of her kimono until she pulled out a small object wrapped in red silk cloth. The color brought a certain shine to the brunette's eyes. The oldest unwrapped the object, and then after seeing it, an emotion finally appeared in the youngest's blue orbs.
It was the top that Kenshin had given her three days ago.
"You'll need it, little one." -Yumi told her.
Kaoru hurriedly took it and hugged it to her chest.
"Thank you so much." She said sincerely.
Then she left.
...
Barely three weeks had passed when she had received a visit from the future leader of the Kiyosato clan, Shinji, as soon as he had arrived at the administrative building of the private temple to Inari.
She had been too busy fixing the situation at the sanctuary as best as possible, selecting the future Guji, who would be on the side of the rebellion and Kaoru, of course, that she had barely had time to seek a report from the Inari miko. That visit caused her certain surprise, even if, in part she had already been expecting it. Shinji entered after being granted access and being announced.
"Kiyosato san, what a surprise." Yumi exclaimed, inviting him to sit in front of her; the boy did so. "Shouldn't you be standing guard?" She inquired.
The boy looked tired, no doubt, but beneath the tiredness there was a certain gleam of worry.
"Excuse me. -He apologized. -After hearing that you were visiting, I decided to come."
"It's about Kaoru sama, isn't it?"
The brunette nodded.
"I'm afraid she is not in a good mental state." He declared.
The woman felt a thorn in her chest.
"Are you suggesting that she has lost her sanity?" She challenged with caution.
The young man in front of her frowned, not without some annoyance.
"I'm implying that the damage after the attack has been too much," he said. "It seems like a kind of post-traumatic shock. She has panic attacks every night without fail, and her rest is reduced because of this."
Yumi already knew that, of course. Kaoru, despite her context and how mature it had made her, was still a child. She wasn't even twelve.
"I didn't know you were literate in such topics." Yumi responded cynically; it was clear that she preferred not to discuss that.
But Shinji did not give up.
"All samurai must be," he told him. "Especially, after the first life we took."
Seeing that there would be no way to embarrass him and noticing for the first time that the young man in front of her was more a man than a child despite his age, Yumi put pretensions aside.
"So? What is your point?" She questioned.
"Why has she not been attended to?" The samurai complained.
Yumi huffed in irritation.
"She doesn't have that luxury."
Shinji became angry.
"Luxury? -He questioned. -We are talking about the seer of Inari! If anyone deserves such luxury, it is undoubtedly her."
"It is precisely because of her position that she does not have the right to one. -Yumi cut him off, her voice above his. -Shinji kun, as you yourself have said, she holds a high position, and she is the promise of the clergy to fully recover their power within the current government. Therefore, she cannot be allowed to appear weak."
"But!"
"Even if it were a life or death situation," she cut him off again, "it would be dealt with privately, and the fact would be denied. Unfortunately, being in confinement and after the popularity she acquired in recent weeks after her kuchiyose, all eyes are on her. We can't risk finding out that there is a problem with the princess of Kyoto."
Shinji was suddenly speechless, because he found no arguments to deny what the miko said. But after undoubtedly remembering the panic attacks his now protégé had been suffering from, he forced himself to continue debating.
"Still, this is not something she can solve on her own with pure meditation and prayers; she needs someone to take care of her! If you allow me-"
"Do not even think about it!" The woman suddenly cut him off; she stood up and was about to knock over the tea service that was between them. "Far from helping her you would be putting her in danger! Do you want a second purge of the sanctuary!?" She warned. "No. Kaoru sama will have to resolve her trauma on her own. And your duty is only to ensure that she does not take her own life. - She sentenced. -I also gave you some help. I know you noticed it."
"It's just a toy." He complained.
"It's her anchor. -She debated. -Just make sure she always has it within reach."
Shinji ruminated under his breath. He wanted so badly to fight that woman... But he understood her words and the concern implicit in them. And that toy...
Just as she had said, without fail, it had served to return Kaoru to the here and now whenever one of her attacks occurred. Frustrated and furious with the situation, Shinji excused himself and left the premises.
As soon as he left, Yumi fell to the ground, and her mask of strength fell apart as soon as it had gotten up.
"I'm sorry... -She sobbed. -I'm so sorry."
She hated Momiji. She hated the terrible plan she had conjured, and she hated her even more for not conceiving it sooner. She hated Kaede for having died before she had instructed Kaoru about the expectations that would be placed on her. She hated the Guji for being so weak when falling under Momiji's spell. She hated Hiko for not allowing her to get close to Kenshin again...
"What can you offer him that won't make him more miserable than he already is?" He had questioned her when she had gone to look for him in her desperation at not seeing a way out, knowing that she had been the one behind the murders at the inn.
But above all she hated herself for not having seen a way out for who was supposed to be her little sister. She had failed her terribly by not recognizing the feelings she harbored for Kenshin, by not understanding the doubts that would drown her and by not having done anything to talk to her to clarify them.
If she had perhaps done so, the little girl could have had another aspiration.
But Shinji was right.
...
Barely a month later she was forced to intervene.
...
"Yumi sama." Sato, her new priest in charge, spoke to her. "We received a new order."
"Understood." Yumi answered.
They were back at the administration building, near where Kaoru resided.
"And Guji sama?"
"He entered the Shinsengumi, just as he predicted," Sato reported. "The latest murders were his work."
"He won't last long before Captain Saito or Okita kills him," Yumi declared, still focused on the documents on her small desk. "We must cover the evidence for as long as possible."
"Hai! The cleaning crew arranged by Katsura has already been dispatched."
The woman frowned. She hated having to work with people outside of her own.
"It will have to be enough for now." She said to herself.
Sato seemed to struggle for a moment before speaking again.
"Something else, the date of presentation before the emperor has moved." He declared, finally getting the woman to look at him with something similar to horror. "As soon as the retreat is over, Kaoru dono must appear and perform the ceremony."
"It is too early." She complained, standing up. "Kaoru sama still can't avoid her panic attacks."
Aphonia.
For a brief moment the woman was overcome with anxiety.
"Say the word and I will do it." Sato told her, managing to get her out of her stupor. Yumi was surprised to see no doubt in the boy's eyes. "The moment has come." He assured.
Yumi sighed defeated, her face showing clear anguish.
"Very good." She said.
Sato left the room in the direction of Inari's private temple.
In her solitude the woman let out a long and anguished sigh. She looked around her, admiring for the first time that space in which she had been working for almost a month and which she barely recognized as such. She headed back to where the documents rested and could only end up throwing everything on the ground in a fit of rage and frustration.
A sob escaped her lips, and then tears blurred her vision. She put a hand to her mouth, trying to prevent her cries from being heard, reminding herself that she had no right to cry. But she herself remembered the deplorable appearance of her protégé.
"Tell me Kaoru sama, have you had visions?" She had questioned her the last time she had gone to see her in confinement.
The girl had denied then, her whole body screaming fatigue and sadness. There were dark circles under her eyes, her skin color was much lighter, and her build even thinner.
"Only nightmares." She had responded, her eyes dry with tears.
"Not even a single glimpse?" Yumi had pressed again, afraid that Kaoru was being abandoned in her visions.
The brunette had shaken her shoulders.
"It's hard to say."
"Aah!" Yumi finally screamed, letting out her cries.
And as she did so, she cursed each and every one of those who had put her in such a place...
...including herself.
Yumi had to speed up Kaoru's healing process if she wanted her plan to bear fruit.
...
As predicted, Shinji returned just a day later, after she sent for him. A terrible stormy night.
...
"Did you ask to see me, your excellency?" Shinji questioned as soon as he entered the enclosure where the miko was resting.
Yumi smiled at him as best she could.
"Welcome Shinji kun. There's something we need to talk about." She told him, offering him a seat.
Still distrustful, the boy sat in front of the woman. He was also worried about leaving Kaoru alone on a stormy night.
"I heard that the date for the presentation with the emperor was brought forward." He said, eager to clarify his own doubts on the subject. During the past weeks he had not rested in his attempts to help Kaoru, but he had made no progress. "I suppose they are trying to maintain the fortune teller's popularity and also, gain the shogun's favor by doing so."
Yumi's smile was filled with bitterness.
"We have no choice. We must attend as we were told." She said.
"Will she be able to travel in her condition?" He questioned.
Yumi sighed in irritation. She knew that this was a struggle for the boy.
"She'll have to do it. -She declared. -I will talk to her before leaving, and I know that she will follow my instructions."
"That is..."
Shinji was going to speak, to infer again about the miko's plans, but she had no time for such things and cut him off instantly.
"It is time for her to fully face the darkness, because she has no more time left." She declared.
Silence.
For a long moment Shinji didn't know what to interpret from those words. But when Yumi finally raised her gaze and directed it towards him, trying to communicate what she could not say in words, the boy's heart seemed to have suffered a fall that had made him touch the ground.
Even more so when seeing the precious toy, the top that had belonged to Himura Kenshin, in the miko's hands. As if the gods themselves were upset, lightning struck in the distance, and the roar that followed the flash of its light further highlighted the poem of emotions at the very center of the samurai.
Between fear, bewilderment and rage, the samurai stood up suddenly, knocking over the tea service as he did so.
"How could you do this?!" He claimed, his hands flying towards his katana.
Yumi remained still, however, staring at the ground.
"Will you help her?" She asked in a quiet but firm voice.
That only made him angrier.
"How could I not?! -He questioned with emotion. -You've gone too far! She's not ready yet! She has not received help from anyone!
"She doesn't have time left." She debated, feeling small for the first time in a long time.
"To hell with that!" He declared before snatching the wooden top from her and then running out of the place, undoubtedly in the direction of where Kaoru was.
Yumi's fortitude collapsed like a sigh.
"I'm sorry..." She sobbed.
She would have liked to stay away.
She would have liked to remain oblivious to everything happening outside the walls of that office.
She would have liked to show up until the storm had ended and Kaoru had emerged from the nightmare of her fears.
She would have liked to not have had to be the one to carry out such an undertaking.
But, the affection she felt for the blue-eyed priestess was much greater than his guilt.
And perhaps it was also the same weight of her guilt that finally forced her to stand up and go in the direction of where the young miko was.
In the midst of the chaos of the storm, its strong winds and the cold of the rain that intensified, Yumi walked among the lights of lightning making her way through the foliage of that mountain.
She reached the main building with difficulty, advancing with regret and soaking the rooms one by one to the core. When it became clear - after finding the chaos in Kaoru's room - that the young miko was not there, she felt her heart clench in her chest as she understood the path her former protégé had followed.
There was a trace of the damage it had surely done. Different personal objects of daily use, as well as the instruments of the temple lay scattered all over the floor. The shoji was torn, and there were fissures, scratches actually, in several of its bands of rice leaves.
When Yumi went out towards the garden, she found a path dotted with dark drops, which, in the light of lightning, revealed to be blood marks. Her body became even colder. Moving hastily, fearing that the girl had done irreparable damage to herself, she reached the edge of the temple. There, near the edge of the field, she found the girl she adored and the samurai who had gone for her moments ago.
Shinji held Kaoru by the shoulders and spoke to her in haste and desperation. While Kaoru struggled to free himself from it, his hands were stained with blood...
At the distance, at which she was, she was not able to hear their voices, but she could get an idea of what was happening...
...
Her heart rested when Kaoru finally gave in to Shinji's words and let herself be embraced by him.
...
From then on, Kaoru changed.
The tears dwindled until they dried up, and so did the panic attacks at night. Yumi was no fool, and knew the support Shinji had provided for the young miko during the subsequent months; but there was some other type of understanding between the two if their dynamic denoted anything.
"Shinji kun must have made her an offer. Her countenance looked different." Yumi debated afterwards to herself.
"Soon" It had been said. "The pieces will soon begin to move."
Four months later, Kaoru appeared before the emperor.
Her debut had been perfect and also blessed with a vision. And although there were sighs asking for a second intervention with the kami who owned the middle name that the miko had mentioned, those voices were instantly silenced. Yumi knew this had been Katsura's doing and was grateful that he kept his end of the deal. When Kaoru had to be checked a second time, no one doubted that she had already been claimed by her regent kami.
Upon her return to the shrine, Yumi dreamed of Momiji.
"It's time." She had told her this.
So the chestnut prepared to leave.
1865
KIOTO
The chariot moved with difficulty over the rocky ground. Despite there having been no rain that afternoon, there were areas muddy from the rains of the previous days. She had just finished returning Kaoru to the shrine after Sato and Hikari's support, but even though it was already night, Yumi still had a long list of activities to finish before calling it a day.
A meeting with Katsura, who had been hiding for two months after finally declaring himself a rebel, was still on the day's list. But before that, he had to send a letter to the Kihetai. If the previous Guji and Momiji's instructions were to be followed to the letter, Yumi would have to ensure the fall of the Kamiya clan if only to bring about a confrontation between the Kiyosato clan and Himura. The latter had to take a more active role in the fight wether he wanted or not.
"Just a little more." She thought to herself.
"In less than five months, all of Kyoto will have to burn," she declared.
Ahead of her, sitting on the opposite bench, Shishio smiled smugly, perhaps ecstatic with the expectation of that promise, or perhaps because it had been precisely her who had uttered it.
A/N: I will write based on reviews LOL
And yes, I realized that this chap should have gone first, but meh! Maybe I'll fix it later, and if not, well meh again! xD
The truth is that I am a gardener-type writer, and it has been difficult for me to prune this story, many of the lines I originally had ended up withering, and I am in the process of deciding which path to continue and which to cut. I hope I don't make a mistake and end up drying out the plant. T_T