"Why can't I go?" Billy asked mulishly while he watched Amy putting on her knee pads. "I'm getting really good at shooting, I've killed walkers."
"I promise I won't be gone all day." Amy smiled at him, he was so cute when he pouted. She absently ran her fingers through Braden's soft hair while he cooed up at her, slapping her covered knees in wonder. His big blue eyes looked like they would pop out of his head, they were so wide.
"I could go with you and watch your back!" Billy raised his foot before he thought better of stomping it, still he crossed his arms over his chest stubbornly. "Why can't I go anywhere? I'm almost ten!"
"Well, I'm sorry to break it to you, Bubs." Amy smiled softly when she approached him, hefting her youngest onto her hip. "You won't be leaving these walls until you're thirteen."
"What?"
"There's no need for you to go out there." Amy used her free hand to pull him close, the boy didn't raise his arms to embrace her like he normally would, just stood as still as a statue. "All this, the long road trip and finding the school was for you and your siblings."
"That doesn't make any sense!" Billy shouted, startling her and Braden, the baby immediately started to sniffle and bury his face into her neck. "We're safe here but I can help!"
"Hey! Don't raise your voice to me."
"Then tell me why I can't go out there!" Billy did not lower his voice, his eyes were getting watery with how upset he was getting. "You can't just keep me trapped here! I can't get better if I'm stuck in a room."
"What did I just say?" Amy scrunched up her brow, still watching him closely while she tried to sooth Braden. "If you want to throw a tantrum you can be grounded in your room."
"You're not my-" Billy's teeth clicked loudly in the suddenly quiet room and the tears won. Amy didn't even get a chance to say anything before he rushed from the room crying.
"What happened to him?" Jamie asked curiously from the doorway.
"Your brother was upset that I wouldn't let him come with us to survey the town for supplies." Amy said in an even tone she was very proud of.
It had only been about four months since the world ended and she became a mother, she had to keep reminding herself that she wasn't their mother. That was a woman who changed their diapers and went to parent teacher nights and sacrificed her life so that they could run. Billy was a child who was upset, she had to keep telling herself mentally. It was strange how the sisterly bonding road trip felt so far away, like it had been years since the world fell. Amy had not looked at her phone or itinerary in months, letting the person she was before fade away in the dust. She could not be her old self, she had to be better. There were people counting on her.
"Well, pretty sure he's just all jealous that you're taking Duke, Mom." Jamie said casually, fiddling with the cuff on her jacket while avoiding Amy's eyes. It made something bittersweet rise in her throat, being the second time the girl had called her mom. "He's such a little turd."
"Jamie." Amy huffed a laugh before roughly pulling the girl into a much needed hug.
"Somethin' ta say?" Daryl's sharp voice made all three of them jump and turn to the door where the hunter had a shame faced Billy by the collar of his shirt. "Ya momma's a busy woman so git on."
"I'm sorry!" Billy sniffled, rushing to embrace the surprised blonde. "I didn't mean it! I just wanted to spend time with you!"
"It's okay, love." Amy sighed, her earlier insecurities bubbling beneath the surface but she couldn't lay those on a child. She had to accept that she was the Adopted mom, Bonus mom, Apocalypse mom but she would never be just mom. That was okay, it was going to be okay because she loved them no matter what they called her. The boy was watching Darly who loomed over them with that scrunched up, open mouth expression he had when he was trying to figure out a problem.
"Daddy!" Emma rushed into the room with Michonne and Andre behind her and Amy wondered if she would ever get privacy again. Then Amy realized that her little girl was crying for daddy in Daryl's arms.
"When did that happen?" Michonne asked when the blonde could not get the words to leave her throat.
"Carol was totally hitting on Daryl!" Jamie suddenly pulled away, gushing with a bright smile on her face. "So, Emma decided to let everyone know that Daryl was our dad and she should stop sni-"
"Jamie." Amy sighed, warmth bubbling in her chest.
"Just like with Judy!" Billy suddenly pulled away to nod in solidarity with his sister. "Judy wanted a baby but she had to get married first. That's why mom and dad got a divorce….but they didn't have a baby because Judy was a whore and whores can't be moms! Are you and Daryl going to get married, mom?"
"I can't even with you, bubs." Amy laughed, poor Judy, she really felt bad for the woman if these were the kinds of things that came out of her son's mouth.
"What I say about callin' people whores?" Daryl lightly slapped the boy in the back of the head while everyone laughed.
"Not to let mom hear me." The boy answered immediately, making Amy turn to the hunter judgmentally.
"What?" Daryl took a step back at the ice in her tone but her kids were completely oblivious.
"But I'm not describing her!" Billy continued on, looking up at Jamie with squinted eyes.
"Yeah, as long as it's not an adjective, it's not a bad word!" The preteen crossed her arms over her chest with a proud smile. "Like bitch!"
"Yeah, it's a noun cause she's a whore person!"
"Jamie!"
"Billy!" Daryl and Amy turned to them both in shock while Michonne was no help, laughing freely at her friend's state.
"What's a whore?" Emma asked innocently, too innocently.
Amy needed a vacation, what were they teaching her children?
After a lot of tearful goodbyes, Amy was finally allowed to leave with Michonne and Duke, the boy was practically vibrating in the back seat with excitement. The drive was short and uneventful since the roads were clear after they passed Tony sitting in the guard shack by the main entrance. The blonde worried about the man being so far away from backup but the soldier assured her he would be fine with a walkie behind bullet proof glass.
The town, which consisted of one main street and four surrounding blocks, was picturesque. It was everything that was glamorized about the 1950s. No large chain stores, all of the windows had thoughtful and beautiful displays. There was even a malt shop and vintage consignment shop which wasn't very vintage since it was all new luxury brand items. How could anyone in the tiny town afford thousand dollar bags? It must have been exclusively for the legacies, even if it made absolutely no sense to Amy.
"Damn, I always wanted one of these." Michonne sighed, caressing her new burberry duffle bag. "I just could not justify spending that much, not with Andre and Mike…"
"Well, it's the end of the world!" Amy tried to wave her friend's sadness away, the older woman still felt guilt about leaving her ex and his best friend to fend for themselves. Once, when they shared a bottle of wine, she admitted that it kept her up at night, wondering if he survived and was looking for her. "I still have a couple pairs of heels I took in the beginning. Will I ever wear them? No, but they were too cute to be left to dry rot in some dead man's house."
"Can we- Woah." Duke shouted, pointing frantically to something down the street.
Where there had been a police station was now just charcoal support beams, the fire had taken out all of the buildings beside it and Amy was surprised there wasn't more damage. It looked like all of the small town's residents were there and the blonde slammed on the brakes, lashing out with her arm to stop Michonne from face planting into the dash.
"Well, that answers the question of why the townies didn't try to take the school." Michonne muttered, the trio staring at dozens of walkers who were beating on the glass doors of what was a post office.
"How many do you think are in there?" Duke whispered softly, his earlier excitement replaced quickly with dread.
"Too many to deal with on our own." Amy decided quickly, putting the car in reverse and hoping the walkers would calm once they were far away. The last thing she wanted was the dead to get loose. It would be better to keep them in one place to kill them all at once.
"We're just going to leave them there?" Michonne questioned, glancing behind them when the blonde whipped the car around and stomped on the gas. "Shouldn't we take care of them now?"
"You're a shit shot and I'm not telling Mitch I let his son get into a fight with losing odds the first time we take him out."
"Yeah, Dad's pretty tightly wound since mom finally let him out of the infirmary." Duke nodded in agreement, even if he looked a little reluctant to admit it.
"The man's about to snap." Michonne continued looking behind her until Amy smacked her on the arm. "No offense."
"That's fine." He shrugged, turning to look behind them before hesitantly asking. "Do you think you'll bring me back when you deal with them?"
The drive back in was much quicker since Amy wasn't worried about taking it slow, they needed to get back into town before they broke the glass. Tony must have called in ahead since there was a large group waiting at the courtyard when they pulled in. Even Carol had showed up, looking eager to help out.
"I've been practicing and Gale has been giving me first aid lessons." Carol said proudly, looking down at her expectantly. While Amy remembered Carol being a badass in her last life, in this life, her real life, she wasn't so sure she would ever see it. However, she was a grown woman and had been minding herself for the most part since they left the farm. "I know I can do this…I don't want to be the woman I was anymore."
"You stick close to us and you won't be getting a gun." Amy finally decided, turning towards the woman and trying to block out the fight Duke was having with his parents. She understood their reservations and would let them make their own choices, no matter what. "You fuck around out there and its your life so you need to shad- where's Merle?"
There was a rush afterwards, fifteen people were going to come along so that they still had a good force left at the school. She did take some of the best shooters but left the one woman army that was Michonne along with Tater and Mitch to keep things running. In less than half an hour, she was back in the car with the Dixons and her children watching them drive away.
"Mother fucker!" Merle slammed his fist on the steering wheel when he noticed the first walker stumbling towards them on main street. "Thought you said they was all trapped."
"Yeah by glass." The blonde at his side rolled her eyes and looked at the redneck like it should have been obvious. She was the first to get out, meeting the other dozen people who came along to finish off the dead and move bodies. "Not my fault you had to change your shirt and get dressed up to kill some walkers."
"Bitch, I just got out of the showa!" Merle grinned nastily, wiggling his eyebrows in what he had boasted many times was his panty droppa move. The blonde obviously didn't agree, just looking at the silent hunter as if asking how they could possibly be related. Daryl just grinned until his brother continued to speak. "You could have joined me, saved the water."
"We all know you don't shower, just a whore's bath with the toilet bowl." Amy's nose scrunched up in disgust and turned away to survey their surroundings. From the corner of her eye, she saw Daryl punch his brother in the shoulder, hard, bringing a small smile to her face. The walkers were still two blocks away but Tony and Wade were getting to high ground while the others spread out.
"Can we get on with this or are you going to continue flirting with the Dixons?" Carol asked snidely, only to regret it the moment the blonde beside him turned to her with a blank expression.
"Go sit in the car." Amy looked the older woman up and down once before dismissing her just as quickly. When she opened her mouth to protest it was shut quickly when the blonde waved an impatient hand. "You want to make pithy comments and cry? Then you stay at the school and do laundry. You wanted a chance to prove yourself and your right back to being a little bitch. I don't have the time or patience."
"I'm sorry. I was just try-" Carol's apology was cut short by a snort from the Dixons beside her.
"Don' know why ya bother wit that one." Merle grumbled after taking a couple steps back, looking genuinely uncomfortable while his brother was glaring at him in annoyance.
"Amy just can' seem to help herself." Daryl said snidely, brushing his fingers along her arm. "Always tryin' ta help lost causes."
Amy and Merle both turned to him in surprise, the quiet man usually just punched his brother in the arm and cursed him. There was a lot of venom in his tone but the mean little smile on his face was worrying, she had never seen it on him before. However, they had a job to do so the blonde squeezed his hand once before stepping up with Tony to kill some walkers.
Rationality returned one a few hours after running off with the boys.
Can't go on like this, Chuckles.
His ghosts had been haunting him since he left Florida and were screaming in his soul when he decided to follow Rick. Chuck didn't plan to stay with them very long, he had plans to put an ocean and continent between himself and his brother's family home if he could. It wasn't long before he started seeing Michael and Christine's ghosts in his new friends. With the way Morgan would stare at his son sometimes, as if he could see his wife's face in his features. Or Rick and Lori arguing and their son pretending he couldn't hear it all. At night, he would dream of Rick or Morgan standing above their children with a gun in hand, assuring them it would all be over soon.
He couldn't stand to let it happen again.
Can't go on like this, Chuckles.
Chuck forcefully shook his head in hopes of dislodging his brother's voice and the image of the gun in his mouth. Michael was the one who had their lives together and raised his little brother out the dirt when he relapsed, his brother was the one with the good job and beautiful wife and was always there to help his fuck up little brother. That all changed when Georgie was diagnosed. Chuck had turned a blind eye to his family spiraling, he couldn't do it again. Not when there were two living breathing children who reminded him of his darling Georgia.
Carl was a brave boy, just like his niece and Duane was always looking at the bright side. It was no chore to read to them or share jokes but he couldn't stand the uncertainty on their faces any longer. Rick was close to snapping and Morgan was staring off into space when Duane tried to talk to him. No, he would give the parents a break before they broke their children.
At least, that's how he rationalized it.
"-It was thanks to a very brave little boy that I'm standing before you all today!" Phillip Blake, or the Governor as his soldiers liked to call him, was doing a rousing eulogy after walkers got in through the fences.
Chuck felt like he was watching his niece die all over again when he reached the carnage. Bodies were scattered everywhere, the smell was enough to make him sick but all he could focus on were three children, bloody and injured. Thankfully, they weren't bit and Duane was the worst off with a sprained ankle. Carl and Penny refused to leave the injured child's side, bringing the little trio closer than ever.
"You've got a good boy." An elderly man clapped him on the shoulder with a grimace. "Protecting our Governor and sweet Penny like tha. Blessed the day Phillip Blake found us, don't know what we would do without him!"
"Duane is a goo-"
"So, we need to take a stand!" Phillip's shout made Chuck snap his mouth shut quickly, turning back to the man in question. "Because we've lived in fear, three of our own have died and many more injured! Our home, our safe haven in this fiery hell has been invaded by these monsters! But it was a boy no older than my Penny who stood up and said no more! We need to borrow some of that courage from Duane and protect ourselves and our home!"
The cheers were deafening, the crowd of thirty were all clapping and hollering for their wise leader. Chuck began to feel uncomfortable. He had noticed there was a darkness in his new friend Phillip. Sure, the man arranged for sermons on Saturdays and even helped him in coming up with topics for his homilies. He wasn't a priest or a pastor but Phillips agreed that in the dark days they were living, faith was very much needed. It was good and reached everyone in their group when they came together for church and lunch every week.
"That's why Friday nights, we've arranged a new event to bring us together!" This was the first Chuck heard of such a thing, he had been wondering if there wasn't more they could be doing as a group. Suddenly, Martinez and Shumpert stepped forward with walkers attached to snare poles and he felt his stomach drop. Phillips reached out and grasped the corpse's jaw, shaking it roughly before spitting in its face. The thing struggled in the hispanic man's grip but its fingers just uselessly brushed against the governor's jacket."Look at it! Less intelligent than any animal and twice as slow! We don't have to be afraid anymore!"
Can't go on like this, Chuckles.
"We don't have to be afraid anymore!"
"Governor!"
"Blake!"
The cheers were drowned out with the feeling of being underwater, he couldn't take his eyes off the corpses that were being paraded around. Martinez even let his own lunge at another of the soldiers and people around him laughed! This was a funeral, those things killed their people only the day before and everyone was laughing and jeering at the walker on a stick. Some were even throwing their food and trash at it, as if suddenly all the danger they represented was gone.
"Fuck you!" The old man who complimented Duane just moments ago moved forward to smack at the walker with his cane, getting applause and praise from the crowd. Shumpert stood in place, keeping the corpse still while the old man whacked at it like a pinata. "We don't have to be afraid anymore!"
The urge to run was strong but he had no way of getting the boys out unnoticed. Chuck had seen the last man who they brought back and let go, Phillip made a show of how sad he was to see the man leaving. However, Shumpert left shortly after and the man's hiking bag found its way into the church's inventory closet. He understood, in the most cold and pragmatic recesses of his mind, the man was a major threat to them all by leaving. Phillip was smart enough to hide the dark tasks of leadership from the rest of the group. They were easily led and if the rambunctious crowd was anything to go by prone to hysteria.
"Where's Daddy?" Penny demanded as soon as he arrived at the infirmary where the children had been locked in. The girl now had four guards on her at all times, which meant Carl and Duane had four sets of eyes on them because she refused to leave her friend alone when he was healing.
"He's just finishing up, they're setting up some kind of even for tonight." Chuck smile was strained when the girl's smile widened.
"Oh, Daddy said we wouldn't start fight nights until Christmas!"
"What's fight nights?" Carl asked loudly and Chuck had to work on his breathing, this bright cheerful girl knew about what her father was planning?"
"We get to beat up the monsters!" Penny cheered, clapping her hands enthusiastically, turning to Duane. "Daddy says that everyone wants to be brave like you now."
"Really?" Both boys asked with two very different expressions, Carl looked down right offended while Duane was radiating smug pride.
"Yeah, Duane saved me and Daddy!"
"Martinez killed the walker." Carl looked at both children as if they were stupid and Chuck thought he needed to have a talk with the boy about jealousy. "He shot like all of them and he saved the goats!"
"Hey, it's just about time for dinner." Chuck cut in before it could devolve into a full blown fight, he was sad to notice that Duane had been pulling away since they arrived. All of his thoughts had been revolved around the pretty little girl who was playing nurse at his bedside. "Duane, Ms. Sam will bring your plate but the doctor said you can come home tomorrow."
"Can't Duane come stay with Daddy and me?" Penny pouted up at him with big eyes, it would work on lesser men but his Georgia had the prettiest eyes that ever existed. "We have the room and heat!"
"I'll speak to your father but I think I would like to have Duane close while he's healing, darling." He cooed at the little girl and ruffled her hair just like he used to do to his niece. Then he remembered the day they all went to the beauty parlor together to shave it off to make a wig. He closed his eyes at the piercing grief that laced his chest. Georgie was gone.
Can't go on like this, Chuckles.
"I'm hungry." Carl announced, hopping off the hospital bed before turning to Duane who looked a little lost. "I'll see you tomorrow."
"Can we have fish tomorrow?" Duane asked hopefully when Chuck stepped forward to pat his hair, it was growing a little wild and he had no idea what to do about it. He would have to ask one of the ladies since brushing it only made it bigger and angrier.
"I talk to my guy in the pantry. I'm sure if anyone can get another cut of fish, it'll be the man who saved Mr. Blake!"
"I'll ask Jenie to throw on a filet for your dinner tonight." Phillip spoke up and startled him, they all turned to the Governor who had slipped in unseen. "He's right, an extra serving of fish is the least I can do after you saved me and my Penny."
"See, you're my hero, Duane." Penny returned to his side after quickly hugging her father who did not look amused at being abandoned for a boy. It made something deep in Chuck ache that Georgie never experienced her first love.
"We need to get going." Chuck felt a little remorseful for leaving the boy in the infirmary, he wanted to bring him back to their little two bedroom apartment.
"Actually, I wanted to have a word…to continue where we left off before I was called away?" The Governor sent him a look which made Chuck grimace.
"Boys, I'll be right back." Carl looked like he was itching to climb out of the window to get out, he noticed that the boy never wanted to stay put.
"I know Penny might have mentioned her idea to have Duane moving in with us. I don't want you to think that just because you are not their father that I will step on any toes. You are their guardian, after all." Phillips didn't beat around the bush and got right to the point as soon as they left the room. "I would have flat out refused but you know Penny cried when we went home last night and I have a hard time saying no."
"I've been doing some thinking about it and when spring hits, I want to go look for them." Chuck said firmly, he had been sick with guilt since the cul de sac had been left abandoned. Taking those boys was for the best, or at least he hoped so. However, he could not keep them separated forever, it wasn't fair to any of them. "You're right, I'm not their father and I don't have a right to raise them. I think He will lead me back to them now that they've had a chance to solve their problems."
"The way you described their parents, I didn't think it would be safe for them." The concerned frown on the other man's face looked genuine but there was something about the man that had Chuck clutching his bible. "Perhaps, it was all in God's plan for you to bring them here, to us. After all, that walker nearly bit Penny before Duane pushed her out of the way and he protected me when I was unconcious."
"I do believe it was in His plan to bring us together." Chuck agreed readily, shaking away the paranoid thoughts, Phillips was his brother in their love of their lord, Jesus Christ. "Psalms 133:1."
"Well, we got months before the roads will be safe for long travel..if they ever are…how about you give me a description and I can have our run teams look out for them." Phillips clapped him on the shoulder, smiling compassionately. "You're doing a good thing, just remember your brother. What could have become of Michael if he had the chance to breathe and grieve? I know my own parents gave me that space after my wife passed away. They'll see, you did them a favor."
"You're a good man, Phillip."